Re: MS and Weight

August 5, 2006

I have felt that attitude from my neurologist. When I saw him in September he said "you've got to do something about your weight". He's pretty blunt and just says everything like that. When I saw him a few weeks ago I didn't like his attitude. He didn't say anything about my weight but I think it was there hanging in the air between us. I complained to his NP about the cane not being enough for me most of the time. She just ignored it. I think the idea is that I wouldn't need more than a cane if I just lost weight.

hugs to you Jackie!

love....Sharon

Sharon (MSersLife Group Owner/Creator)

Kind words may be short... but their echoes are endless.... Mother Theresa

MS and Weight

Hi everyone,â€¦..I know I have brought this up before, but I donâ€™t think Iâ€™ve talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby being in denial about their MS, [iâ€™m sorry I forgot who it was] I too have that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years. 200 lbs to be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isnâ€™t much emotional support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the physical things for the most part, but

half the time he acts like: â€œif youâ€™d only lose weightâ€ youâ€™d be able to do this yourself. ANDâ€¦â€¦ to add insult to injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way, because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or take me to PT [if it was ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,â€¦..just every day stuff that goes undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I havenâ€™t lost enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me then it wonâ€™t force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be enabling me.

My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad about myself because I gained all this weight, and I havenâ€™t lost any, even though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I canâ€™t seem to not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I canâ€™t take many medicines to stop or lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and loved sports, and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I canâ€™t do that anymore I have all this pent up energy I just donâ€™t know how to get rid of. I donâ€™t eat a lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I canâ€™t eat a lot. So its not like Iâ€™m downing 10 Big Macâ€™s, and eating Bon Bons by the ton.

But, when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there isnâ€™t very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just lost the weight I would be okay then. I donâ€™t want sympathy, I just want some one to offer some help. I canâ€™t afford to hire someone.

Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more. Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part.

Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it?

Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0

August 5, 2006

Hi Jackie,

Did your doctor ever tell you if any of your meds. could put

on weight? If not maybe he could explains if this could be part of

the problem, when you see him again. My doctor told me at least two

of my meds puts on at least 4 pounds a years each. The meds could be

part of the problem with our ms and extra weight. Well good luck with

every thing and have a great day. Remember it is what is on the

inside that counts not what we look like on the outside. Gale

-- In MSersLife , " Jackie Hanan " wrote:

>

> Hi everyone,...I know I have brought this up before, but I don't

think I've

> talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their

hubby

> being in denial about their MS, [i'm sorry I forgot who it was] I

too have

> that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and

pain on

> the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years.

200 lbs to

> be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite

a few

> added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the

spasms, and

> some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only

I lost

> the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn't much

emotional

> support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about

doing the

> physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts

like: " if you'd

> only lose weight " you'd be able to do this yourself. AND.. to add

insult to

> injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the

same way,

> because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered

to help

> me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or take me to PT

[if it was

> ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,...just every day stuff that

goes

> undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I

haven't lost

> enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them

for me

> then it won't force me to do anything about my weight, and they

will just be

> enabling me.

> My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel

so bad

> about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven't lost

any, even

> though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and

then I gain

> it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can't

seem to

> not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can't take many medicines

to stop or

> lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I

use to

> be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and

loved sports,

> and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can't do that

anymore I have

> all this pent up energy I just don't know how to get rid of. I

don't eat a

> lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can't eat a

lot. So

> its not like I'm downing 10 Big Mac's, and eating Bon Bons by the

ton. But,

> when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So

there

> isn't very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if

I just

> lost the weight I would be okay then. I don't want sympathy, I

just want

> some one to offer some help. I can't afford to hire someone.

> Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even

more.

> Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part.

> Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it?

> Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0

>

August 5, 2006

Hi Sharon,…….its

not that I don’t want to lose weight, but it just seems so overwhelming

to me, and requires I give up more things that I enjoy. I’ve always been

a food person, and cooking I delighted in, and making sure everyone was

enjoying whatever I made. Those days are over as I can’t cook very often

now, but I still like all the different meals that seem to be off limits if you

want to lose weight. I have tried to modify many of my favorites, and I don’t

think it’s the main menu’s, but the

desserts that I have a harder time finding satisfying tastes. I have tried many

of the artificial sweeteners only to gag on the aftertaste. I just ordered a

Stevia blend so maybe I’ll have better luck with it. I know there has to

be a way to have my “cake” and eat it too!! lol….

Thanks for the hugs, they were much needed as I have been feeling rather

low again lately, so I’ve been doing mostly lurking.

Love and hugs, Jackie

p/s thanks for recommending iherbs, I’ve ordered from them

twice now, and I am impressed with how efficient they are in getting my stuff

to me.

From: MSersLife [mailto:MSersLife ] On Behalf Of Sharon

Marsden

Sent: Saturday, August 05, 2006 5:59 AM

To: MSersLife

Subject: Re: MS and

Weight

I have felt that attitude from my neurologist.

When I saw him in September he said " you've got to do something about your

weight " . He's pretty blunt and just says everything like

that. When I saw him a few weeks ago I didn't like his attitude. He

didn't say anything about my weight but I think it was there hanging in the air

between us. I complained to his NP about the cane not being enough for me

most of the time. She just ignored it. I think the idea is that I

wouldn't need more than a cane if I just lost weight.

hugs to you Jackie!

love....Sharon

Sharon

(MSersLife Group Owner/Creator)

Kind words

may be short... but their echoes are endless.... Mother Theresa

MS and Weight

Hi everyone,…..I know I have brought this up before, but I

don’t think I’ve talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who

talked about their hubby being in denial about their MS, [i’m sorry I

forgot who it was] I too have that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my

disabilities and pain on the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the

last 25 years. 200 lbs to be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few

added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and some

of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost the weight

I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn’t much emotional support

for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the physical

things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: “if you’d

only lose weight” you’d be able to do this yourself.

AND…… to add insult to injury I am afraid others in my family [his

relatives] feel the same way, because in the 14 years we have been here, no one

has even offered to help me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or

take me to PT [if it was ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,…..just

every day stuff that goes undone because I think its like a punishment to me

because I haven’t lost enough weight to be able to do those things

myself. If they do them for me then it won’t force me to do anything

about my weight, and they will just be enabling me.

My in-laws have been

so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad about myself because I

gained all this weight, and I haven’t lost any, even though I have tried

off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain it back. Especially

when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can’t seem to not eat the sweets

to comfort myself. I can’t take many medicines to stop or lesson the pain

much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to be able to do for

enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and loved sports, and getting out for

walks, and such. Now that I can’t do that anymore I have all this pent up

energy I just don’t know how to get rid of. I don’t eat a lot

because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can’t eat a lot. So

its not like I’m downing 10 Big Mac’s, and eating Bon Bons by the

ton. But, when people look at me, I think they

think I do eat that much. So there isn’t very much sympathy for my

disabilities, because after all if I just lost the weight I would be okay then. I don’t want sympathy, I just want some one to

offer some help. I can’t afford to hire someone.

Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more. Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part.

Anyone else run into

this problem? And if so how do you handle it?

Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0

August 5, 2006

What meds do you take Gale?

Sharon

Sharon (MSersLife Group Owner/Creator)

Kind words may be short... but their echoes are endless.... Mother Theresa

Re: MS and Weight

Hi Jackie,Did your doctor ever tell you if any of your meds. could put on weight? If not maybe he could explains if this could be part of the problem, when you see him again. My doctor told me at least two of my meds puts on at least 4 pounds a years each. The meds could be part of the problem with our ms and extra weight. Well good luck with every thing and have a great day. Remember it is what is on the inside that counts not what we look like on the outside. Gale-- In MSersLife@yahoogrou ps.com, "Jackie Hanan" <rubyjax@... > wrote:>> > Hi everyone,... I know I have brought this up before, but I don't think I've> talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby> being in denial about their MS, [i'm sorry I forgot who it was] I too have> that problem with my

hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on> the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years. 200 lbs to> be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few> added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and> some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost> the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn't much emotional> support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the> physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: "if you'd> only lose weight" you'd be able to do this yourself. AND.. to add insult to> injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way,> because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help> me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or

take me to PT [if it was> ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,...just every day stuff that goes> undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I haven't lost> enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me> then it won't force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be> enabling me. > My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad> about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven't lost any, even> though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain> it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can't seem to> not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can't take many medicines to stop or> lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to> be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical

person, and loved sports,> and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can't do that anymore I have> all this pent up energy I just don't know how to get rid of. I don't eat a> lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can't eat a lot. So> its not like I'm downing 10 Big Mac's, and eating Bon Bons by the ton. But,> when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there> isn't very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just> lost the weight I would be okay then. I don't want sympathy, I just want> some one to offer some help. I can't afford to hire someone. > Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more.> Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part. > Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it?> Weak smiles, Jackie

:-*0>

August 5, 2006

What meds do you take Gale?

Sharon

Sharon (MSersLife Group Owner/Creator)

Kind words may be short... but their echoes are endless.... Mother Theresa

Re: MS and Weight

Hi Jackie,Did your doctor ever tell you if any of your meds. could put on weight? If not maybe he could explains if this could be part of the problem, when you see him again. My doctor told me at least two of my meds puts on at least 4 pounds a years each. The meds could be part of the problem with our ms and extra weight. Well good luck with every thing and have a great day. Remember it is what is on the inside that counts not what we look like on the outside. Gale-- In MSersLife@yahoogrou ps.com, "Jackie Hanan" <rubyjax@... > wrote:>> > Hi everyone,... I know I have brought this up before, but I don't think I've> talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby> being in denial about their MS, [i'm sorry I forgot who it was] I too have> that problem with my

hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on> the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years. 200 lbs to> be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few> added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and> some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost> the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn't much emotional> support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the> physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: "if you'd> only lose weight" you'd be able to do this yourself. AND.. to add insult to> injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way,> because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help> me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or

take me to PT [if it was> ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,...just every day stuff that goes> undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I haven't lost> enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me> then it won't force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be> enabling me. > My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad> about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven't lost any, even> though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain> it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can't seem to> not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can't take many medicines to stop or> lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to> be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical

person, and loved sports,> and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can't do that anymore I have> all this pent up energy I just don't know how to get rid of. I don't eat a> lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can't eat a lot. So> its not like I'm downing 10 Big Mac's, and eating Bon Bons by the ton. But,> when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there> isn't very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just> lost the weight I would be okay then. I don't want sympathy, I just want> some one to offer some help. I can't afford to hire someone. > Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more.> Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part. > Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it?> Weak smiles, Jackie

:-*0>

August 5, 2006

Hi Gale,….I

only take oxycodone, valium, and Armor Thyroid for meds. I went for 10 years

with undiagnosed Hypothyroidism, and I gained most of the weight during that

time. Some weeks as much as 3-5 lbs or so. I kept asking

the Dr.’s if my thyroid might need to be checked, but it always came back

within the normal range. Finally 100 lbs later it measured just a tad under the

normal limit, and I was put on meds. Guess what? The rapid weight gaining stopped.

I have a lot of fluid

retention that may or may not be associated with my heart problem.

I don’t have a

problem with how I look as much as the rest of my family and friends do. They were

use to seeing me at 125, and now I am more than twice that, and they just don’t

like it. My hubby has gained with me, so he doesn’t ever complain about

how I look. His main thing is he is convinced I would be able to move better,

and not be so disabled. He may be right to a point, but it puts a lot of

pressure on me to try and lose the weight to prove to him one way or another if

it is the main problem of my disabilities.

Thanks for the suggestion!

Smiles, Jackie J

From: MSersLife [mailto:MSersLife ] On Behalf Of gbuerk

Sent: Saturday, August 05, 2006 6:25 AM

To: MSersLife

Subject: Re: MS and

Weight

Hi Jackie,

Did your doctor ever tell you if any of your meds. could put

on weight? If not maybe he could explains if this could be part of

the problem, when you see him again. My doctor told me at least two

of my meds puts on at least 4 pounds a years each. The meds could be

part of the problem with our ms and extra weight. Well good luck with

every thing and have a great day. Remember it is what is on the

inside that counts not what we look like on the outside. Gale

..

August 5, 2006

Hi Gale,….I

only take oxycodone, valium, and Armor Thyroid for meds. I went for 10 years

with undiagnosed Hypothyroidism, and I gained most of the weight during that

time. Some weeks as much as 3-5 lbs or so. I kept asking

the Dr.’s if my thyroid might need to be checked, but it always came back

within the normal range. Finally 100 lbs later it measured just a tad under the

normal limit, and I was put on meds. Guess what? The rapid weight gaining stopped.

I have a lot of fluid

retention that may or may not be associated with my heart problem.

I don’t have a

problem with how I look as much as the rest of my family and friends do. They were

use to seeing me at 125, and now I am more than twice that, and they just don’t

like it. My hubby has gained with me, so he doesn’t ever complain about

how I look. His main thing is he is convinced I would be able to move better,

and not be so disabled. He may be right to a point, but it puts a lot of

pressure on me to try and lose the weight to prove to him one way or another if

it is the main problem of my disabilities.

Thanks for the suggestion!

Smiles, Jackie J

From: MSersLife [mailto:MSersLife ] On Behalf Of gbuerk

Sent: Saturday, August 05, 2006 6:25 AM

To: MSersLife

Subject: Re: MS and

Weight

Hi Jackie,

Did your doctor ever tell you if any of your meds. could put

on weight? If not maybe he could explains if this could be part of

the problem, when you see him again. My doctor told me at least two

of my meds puts on at least 4 pounds a years each. The meds could be

part of the problem with our ms and extra weight. Well good luck with

every thing and have a great day. Remember it is what is on the

inside that counts not what we look like on the outside. Gale

..

August 5, 2006

Honey, I'm sorry you have to deal with this. My best friend in high school was always "chunky" or "full figured" but when she started dating this boy that was abusive to here(when she was 15-17)He just totally destroyed her own self value and she gained 200 pounds. I think she was weighing around 360 pounds but got married and had a child. Her husband accepted her as she was. But her insurance paid for a gastric bypass due to family history and her health problems(she also had hypothyroidism) She was the same as you, before her surgery she ate no more than I did, her body just processed it differently. Would your insurance cover that for health reasons for you? 'Jackie Hanan wrote: Hi everyone,…..I know I have brought this up before, but I don’t think I’ve talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby being in denial about their MS, [i’m sorry I forgot who it was] I too have that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on the enormous amount of weight I have put on in

the last 25 years. 200 lbs to be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn’t much emotional support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: “if you’d only lose weight” you’d be able to do this yourself. AND…… to add insult to injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way, because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or take me to PT [if it was ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,…..just every day stuff that goes undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I haven’t lost enough

weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me then it won’t force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be enabling me. My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven’t lost any, even though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can’t seem to not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can’t take many medicines to stop or lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and loved sports, and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can’t do that anymore I have all this pent up energy I just don’t know

how to get rid of. I don’t eat a lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can’t eat a lot. So its not like I’m downing 10 Big Mac’s, and eating Bon Bons by the ton. But, when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there isn’t very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just lost the weight I would be okay then. I don’t want sympathy, I just want some one to offer some help. I can’t afford to hire someone. Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more. Everyone seems to just ignore the MS

part. Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it? Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0

August 6, 2006

{{{{{{{{Jackie}}}}}}}} There is that strange attitude that if a person is overweight, they must be eating enormous portions of food and doing so all day long. Of course, if that were true, there would be great amounts of weight added constantly, daily and weekly. From childhood, I could eat big meals and stay right where I was in weight, while others can't. Lots of folks who are overweight eat very small portions. Just goofy ideas people have. I'd long been a "smaller" weight person, gaining right good while pregnant, then losing it all within a year. Well, the year was with the boys. The girls are about two years. LOL About eight years ago, however, I began putting on weight and very quickly. I gained about roughly 60 to 70 pounds in five or six months. That was due to "other issues". Addressed and weight gain stopped. Ah, but weight

hasn't been lost, either. LOL Then came pregnancy numbers three and four and I gained that good bit of weight. My PG weight is gone. The rest is not. I don't know if anyone would consider my weight being the cause of any problems I have. But then, I don't tell most people about the problems I have. The vast majority of family, in fact, have no idea. With Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, some folks believe that's weight related. I can only imagine what they'd think of MSish stuff. LOL My Ex-In-Laws were preoccupied with weight, but it was manageable. (I wasn't heavy then). My sons have always been big kids. Big babies and on it went. Their bio-dad had a lot of trouble with criticism from family while he was growing up. He will always be worried about weight. He normally was "overweight", but even when smaller, he felt

huge. After divorce, more comments came regarding the boys. I heard most of them, but the boys began hearing more. It's hurtful and harmful. My wonderful in-laws I have now are focused on weight. My MIL is always on a "diet" and has tried everything out there, as have a few other family members. My FIL actually has an eating disorder. He realizes it to some extent. His health is adversely affected by the extreme yo-yo'ing he does. Weight is always a topic and and I have laughed, betting on how long into a visit it might be before weight is brought up. lol <g> For my FIL, weight is enough of an issue that when Jenna was an infant of early months, and had visited a doctor, FIL's question was "did he say anything about her weight?" ROFL Good grief! Yes, he said she was beautiful and healthy! LOL My weight makes some things harder than they once were, I'm sure. I do feel a difference after having lost some weight in the last year. However, it is not the cause of my numbing, fatigue, pains, etc. <g> Going from being very physcially active to not being able to do the things you so long loved, has to be very difficult. It isn't helped at all by the attitudes of others, overtly expressed or not. I'm sorry, Jackie. Hugs, Challis Jackie Hanan wrote: Hi everyone,…..I know I have brought this up before, but I don’t think I’ve talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby being in denial about their MS, [i’m sorry I forgot who it was] I too have that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years. 200 lbs to be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few added problems, but I do

not think it has contributed to the spasms, and some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn’t much emotional support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: “if you’d only lose weight” you’d be able to do this yourself. AND…… to add insult to injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way, because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or take me to PT [if it was ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,…..just every day stuff that goes undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I haven’t lost enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me then it won’t force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be enabling me.

My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven’t lost any, even though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can’t seem to not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can’t take many medicines to stop or lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and loved sports, and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can’t do that anymore I have all this pent up energy I just don’t know how to get rid of. I don’t eat a lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can’t eat a lot. So its not like I’m downing 10 Big Mac’s, and eating

Bon Bons by the ton. But, when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there isn’t very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just lost the weight I would be okay then. I don’t want sympathy, I just want some one to offer some help. I can’t afford to hire someone. Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more. Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part. Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it? Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0 __________________________________________________

August 6, 2006

Jackie, I just wanted to tell you, that there is more to you, than weight. I struggled with weight since I was about 11 yrs old. My hormones are constantly out of whack, and as soon as puberty hit, so did the weight. I have been dx'd with PCOS, which makes it difficult to lose weight. Before I was dx'd with diabetes , I was told I was insulin resistant, something that went along with the pcos. In 2001, I had gastric bypass surgery. I started out at 300 lbs. I was hoping to lose enough to "fit in" to society more and feel better about myself. I lost 110 lbs, bringing me down to 190. I never lost another lb, even though I hardly ate anything. So, when people say that overweight people are heavy because of eating a lot, it simply isn't always the case. Since I hit my lowest weight back in 2001, I slowly gained back 40 lbs. Not by overeating, because only a small amt. fits into my pouch now. But, here I sit at 230 for the last 3 years. If I do a very strict low carb diet, I can lose 10 lbs, but I don't lose any more than that no matter what I do. So, I am happy I had the surgery, because with it came a new way of thinking. I got so many compliments as I lost weight. My self esteem skyrocketed for the first time in my life. I met and married my husband, which was the best thing I ever did. He is my best friend. We added 2 more children to our house since 2003. (we have 4 now) I would still like to lose this 40 lbs and get back down to 190, but it has been very hard. I find that I am now "average" sz, even though I am 230. The 70 lbs I have kept off is a big deal. I can move so much better now. And I still have my newfound attitude about myself. It stuck somehow. lol. So, I'm saying a few things. Gastric bypass is not a cure all. I became my sickest after I lost weight. You probably won't lose as much as you hope to lose. And, you do not have to overeat to be heavy. I am living proof. When I weighed 300 lbs, some people only saw the weight, and not the person. Kwim? That hurt. I am a complex individual. I am pretty, smart, funny..... I started to like myself. I can be sexy when I want, although with 4 kids it isn't often. lol. : ) You deserve love, friendship, and all the good things in life. There is much more to you, than weight.

You take care girl, Trista

Re: MS and Weight

{{{{{{{{Jackie}}}}}}}}

There is that strange attitude that if a person is overweight, they must be eating enormous portions of food and doing so all day long. Of course, if that were true, there would be great amounts of weight added constantly, daily and weekly. From childhood, I could eat big meals and stay right where I was in weight, while others can't. Lots of folks who are overweight eat very small portions. Just goofy ideas people have.

I'd long been a "smaller" weight person, gaining right good while pregnant, then losing it all within a year. Well, the year was with the boys. The girls are about two years. LOL About eight years ago, however, I began putting on weight and very quickly. I gained about roughly 60 to 70 pounds in five or six months. That was due to "other issues". Addressed and weight gain stopped. ! ; Ah, but weight hasn't been lost, either. LOL Then came pregnancy numbers three and four and I gained that good bit of weight. My PG weight is gone. The rest is not.

I don't know if anyone would consider my weight being the cause of any problems I have. But then, I don't tell most people about the problems I have. The vast majority of family, in fact, have no idea. With Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, some folks believe that's weight related. I can only imagine what they'd think of MSish stuff. LOL

My Ex-In-Laws were preoccupied with weight, but it was manageable. (I wasn't heavy then). My sons have always been big kids. Big babies and on it went. Their bio-dad had a lot of trouble with criticism from family while he was growing up. He will always be worried about weight. He normally was "overweight", but even when smaller, he felt huge. After divorce, more comments came regarding the boys. I heard most of them, but the boys began hearing more. It's hurtful and harmful.

My wonderful in-laws I have now are focused on weight. My MIL is always on a "diet" and has tried everything out there, as have a few other family members. My FIL actually has an eating disorder. He realizes it to some extent. His health is adversely affected by the extreme yo-yo'ing he does. Weight is always a topic and and I have laughed, betting on how long into a visit it might be before weight is brought up. lol <g>

For my FIL, weight is enough of an issue that when Jenna was an infant of early months, and had visited a doctor, FIL's question was "did he say anything about her weight?" ROFL Good grief! Yes, he said she was beautiful and healthy! LOL

My weight makes some things harder than they once were, I'm sure. I do feel a difference after having lost some weight in the last year. However, it is not the cause of my numbing, fatigue, pains, etc. <g>

Going from being very physcially active to not being able to do the things you so long loved, has to be very difficult. It isn't helped at all by the attitudes of others, overtly expressed or not. I'm sorry, Jackie.

Hugs,

Challis

Jackie Hanan <rubyjaxcenturytel (DOT) net> wrote:

Hi everyone,…..I know I have brought this up before, but I don’t think I’ve talked about it in this way. Who ever it was who talked about their hubby being in denial about their MS, [i’m sorry I forgot who it was] I too have that problem with my hubby, only he blames all my disabilities and pain on the enormous amount of weight I have put on in the last 25 years. 200 lbs to be exact. More pounds, not total. My added weight has caused quite a few added problems, but I do not think it has contributed to the spasms, and some of the other problems I have. My hubby seems to think if only I lost the weight I would be ALL better!! So I feel like there isn’t much emotional support for how hard it is for me. He has been pretty good about doing the physical things for the most part, but half the time he acts like: “if you’d only lose weight” you’d be able to do this yourself. AND…… to add insult to injury I am afraid others in my family [his relatives] feel the same way, because in the 14 years we have been here, no one has even offered to help me. I sure could use someone to clean my house, or take me to PT [if it was ordered], or swimming, or cut my hair,…..just every day stuff that goes undone because I think its like a punishment to me because I haven’t lost enough weight to be able to do those things myself. If they do them for me then it won’t force me to do anything about my weight, and they will just be enabling me.

My in-laws have been so obsessed with weight, and have made me feel so bad about myself because I gained all this weight, and I haven’t lost any, even though I have tried off and on over the years. I lose some, and then I gain it back. Especially when I am sick, or going thru a flare I can’t seem to not eat the sweets to comfort myself. I can’t take many medicines to stop or lesson the pain much. Everything else has been taken from me that I use to be able to do for enjoyment. I was a very physical person, and loved sports, and getting out for walks, and such. Now that I can’t do that anymore I have all this pent up energy I just don’t know how to get rid of. I don’t eat a lot because I also have IBS, and when that is flaring I can’t eat a lot. So its not like I’m downing 10 Big Mac’s, and eating Bon Bons by the ton. But, when people look at me, I think they think I do eat that much. So there isn’t very much sympathy for my disabilities, because after all if I just lost the weight I would be okay then. I don’t want sympathy, I just want some one to offer some help. I can’t afford to hire someone.

Having MS sucks, but having MS and being morbidly obese sucks even more. Everyone seems to just ignore the MS part.

Anyone else run into this problem? And if so how do you handle it?

Weak smiles, Jackie :-*0

__________________________________________________

August 6, 2006

Trista, that was a brave post! I weigh about 200 lbs., but am over 5'

10" which does make some difference; the weight came with age and

inactivity after joint replacement. I just eat reasonably and do NOT worry about it, nor does my internist! Love to you, n