Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

[Guest guest]

> Is this due to their

> hearing impairement or one of those " extras " some kids have? Anyone

> have any thoughts?

For us, when JD got his cochlear implant, his ability to focus increased

quite a bit. Of course, I certainly wouldn't even dream of suggesting this

as advice for solving the problem, but for JD, his inability to focus seemed

to stem from his hearing problems.

Kay

[Guest guest]

We have found that with Ashleigh, the less she understands, the more

frustrated she becomes and the less focused. Could it be the work is

difficult and therefore she is trying to avoid it?

" Stay on task "

karin

RE: E Mapa

> >

> >..... What have you all done re: Hayley's focusing issues?

> > If you have any suggestions or comments I would really appreciate

hearing

> >them.

> >

> >Sabreen has been diagnosed as having ADD, but since the diagnosis is so

> >subjective and based mostly on observation I'm not sure that is in fact

her

> >problem. But she definitely has a problem with inattention and lack of

> >focus and organizational skills.

> >

> >Shabana

>

>

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[Guest guest]

I think it depends on what other issues. If he has other issues besides

deafness causing him to not learn language, you need to get it written in

the IEP that the teachers need to work with those other issues to get him

closer on track. For instance our teacher used kind of like a PECS

system...they use those for autistic kids also...and to get the kids to stay

on task, each day Hayley and the other ones with other issues would do their

things according to the picture. The entire classroom is covered with

language.

I thought Hayley would be language delayed forever, and that is not the

case...she is certainly catching up.

I am not sure how old your son is, but I would get on this issue...get

assessments at the schools for the deaf so they can show you how to work

with your son. They'd give the home school a report with ideas also.

Request one asap via your school district; ours took over a year to get.

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Uponelist

>To: <Listen-Uponelist>

>Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>Date: Thu, 2 Mar 2000 07:56:54 -0700

>

>my son as a language delay that I am told he would have even if he were a

>hearing, speaking child.

> Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>

>

> >

> >

> > > Is this due to their

> > > hearing impairement or one of those " extras " some kids have? Anyone

> > > have any thoughts?

> >

> > For us, when JD got his cochlear implant, his ability to focus increased

> > quite a bit. Of course, I certainly wouldn't even dream of suggesting

>this

> > as advice for solving the problem, but for JD, his inability to focus

>seemed

> > to stem from his hearing problems.

> >

> > Kay

> >

> >

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> > All messages posted to this list are private and confidential. Each

>post

>is the intellectual property of the author and therefore subject to

>copyright restrictions.

> >

> >

>

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[Guest guest]

my son as a language delay that I am told he would have even if he were a

hearing, speaking child.

Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>

>

> > Is this due to their

> > hearing impairement or one of those " extras " some kids have? Anyone

> > have any thoughts?

>

> For us, when JD got his cochlear implant, his ability to focus increased

> quite a bit. Of course, I certainly wouldn't even dream of suggesting this

> as advice for solving the problem, but for JD, his inability to focus

seemed

> to stem from his hearing problems.

>

> Kay

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> GET A NEXTCARD VISA, in 30 seconds! Get rates

> as low as 0.0% Intro APR and no hidden fees.

> Apply NOW!

> http://click./1/975/1/_/440511/_/951974158/

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> All messages posted to this list are private and confidential. Each post

is the intellectual property of the author and therefore subject to

copyright restrictions.

>

>

[Guest guest]

I know that with , when he doesnt understand

what is going on around him and cant make out what

people are saying, he really loses focus and his

attention goes elsewhere. Its improved dramatically at

school since he got an FM unit but at home I think the

trouble with staying focused is just from frustration

of not always knowing what is going on around him.

J.

--- Terri wrote:

> Hi Shabana and and any one else with a hearing

> impaired child who

> has a problem with inattention and lack of focus.

> The lack of focus

> is a big issue with several HI children I know. Is

> this due to their

> hearing impairement or one of those " extras " some

> kids have? Anyone

> have any thoughts?

>

> Also, what can you do to help? As Shabana said, if

> you have any

> suggestions or comments I would also really

> appreciate hearing them.

>

> Thanks,

>

> Terri , Mother of Kathy, 5 HoH, " Focus dear,

> Focus " is my

> constant refrain

>

>

> >Message: 5

> > Date: Mon, 28 Feb 2000 09:00:18 -0500

> >

> >Subject: RE: E Mapa

> >

> >..... What have you all done re: Hayley's

> focusing issues?

> > If you have any suggestions or comments I would

> really appreciate hearing

> >them.

> >

> >Sabreen has been diagnosed as having ADD, but since

> the diagnosis is so

> >subjective and based mostly on observation I'm not

> sure that is in fact her

> >problem. But she definitely has a problem with

> inattention and lack of

> >focus and organizational skills.

> >

> >Shabana

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

> Is this due to their

> hearing impairement or one of those " extras " some kids have? Anyone

> have any thoughts?

Hi I am new to the list, I have a 81/2 y.o. daughter with a bilateral

sensorineural hearing loss. We don't know if she was born with it or if it

happened when she had 2 febrile seizure at 18mos old.

Andria was a very uncooperative child at 21/2 when she was finally

diagnosed...she was a smart cookie and did whatever her brother did(he's 2 years

older than her) and she was saying some words, anyway...I think their brains

need to " catch up " this is not scientific just my feelings. Their ears didn't

hear so their brains cannot properlyprocess the info

being sent. I had to " teach " her to cooperate, it was tough, but i worked

with her for at least 15mins everyday, and she still had a difficult time

cooperating with the teacher. Try short activities, something they enjoy, try

to be casual and not make it a big deal...maybe they just need a little more

time to grow.

Tracey

3kids 10 hearing(speech delayed)

Andria 8 H.I.

Isabelle 3 hearing

I am glad to be a part of this group...Kay is a wonderful help.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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restrictions.

[Guest guest]

This is Tracey again,

Just thought of something...they depend on their other senses so much...maybe

they just get tired of watching, listening....maybe they need a break???

I know if it was my job to listen all the time i would get tired, infact

sometimes i wish i could turn the volume down on my hearing ears

RE: E Mapa

> >

> >..... What have you all done re: Hayley's

> focusing issues?

> > If you have any suggestions or comments I would

> really appreciate hearing

> >them.

> >

> >Sabreen has been diagnosed as having ADD, but since

> the diagnosis is so

> >subjective and based mostly on observation I'm not

> sure that is in fact her

> >problem. But she definitely has a problem with

> inattention and lack of

> >focus and organizational skills.

> >

> >Shabana

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Hi, Lukas has this problem, also. But only with language. He is able to

focus great on anything that does not require language. He even goes so far

as to tune people out by grimacing and fidgiting. It is odd. While his

language has improved this year considerably, he still has quite a problem

with acquiring new language. He has other issues, but I cant tell you what

they are. One doctor thinks it may be anxiety. He just doesnt communicate

like he should be. He is VERY emotional. Easily frustrated. Somewhat

agressive. Highly defiant. But he is turning seven, he is a boy, and he is

deaf.....what the heck is normal, anyway? so, I dont know if he would have

these issues if he were not deaf, I think maybe alot of it comes from

frustration due to lack of language.

RE: E Mapa

> >

> >..... What have you all done re: Hayley's focusing issues?

> > If you have any suggestions or comments I would really appreciate

hearing

> >them.

> >

> >Sabreen has been diagnosed as having ADD, but since the diagnosis is so

> >subjective and based mostly on observation I'm not sure that is in fact

her

> >problem. But she definitely has a problem with inattention and lack of

> >focus and organizational skills.

> >

> >Shabana

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

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> Get a NextCard Visa, in 30 seconds! Get rates as low as

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> Apply NOW!

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> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> All messages posted to this list are private and confidential. Each post

is the intellectual property of the author and therefore subject to

copyright restrictions.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Stefanie, I have no idea. This big wig ped. neuro pshych did some evals on

him and said that he may have this even if he were hearing. But, like I

say, I think alot of his language and behavior issues come from frustration,

I dont necissarily believe that he would have delays or behavior problems if

he were hearing. It is all sooooo frustrating. If I can find a

professional who knows anything about deaf children, he doesnt know anything

about other issues, if I can find one who knows something about behavior

/lang. issues, they cant relate it to deaf children. They all say (or

imply) well he is deaf, duh, of course he has language and behavior issues.

Not the case, I dont believe, I know of many deaf kids who are right up with

language and have no other issues, one of them lives in my house ! Our

daughter has always been way ahead with lang (sign) and is very " typical "

for a deaf child. UUUUUHHHH! Sorry, I am venting today, have a good day,

Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>

>

> >If you don't mind my asking, how do they know that? My son is 18

> >months, and I'm still waiting for words, though he babbles a lot, so

> >I'm curious about how they evaluate something like that.

>

> Stefanie

>

> >

> >

> >my son as a language delay that I am told he would have even if he were a

> >hearing, speaking child.

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

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> All messages posted to this list are private and confidential. Each post

is the intellectual property of the author and therefore subject to

copyright restrictions.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Stefanie:

Not sure how old your son is (I have too much going on now) but if you sign

to him, he is noticing and will begin to catch on. I think it has to do with

peripheral vision. I think Hayley signed her first sentence at four. It

was " pat the dog? " One of my concerns with Hayley and NOT signing was that

she was so good with her facial expressions that she got away with not using

her language for a while. When your son sees the power language gives

him...maybe when he drags you to the pantry and you figure out what he

wants, if you know the sign for it, model it for him and then ask that he

sign it also. I know that raising a special needs kid is hard when you have

other kids and maybe a job to deal with at the same time, and then add going

to school to learn sign.

GOod luck,

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Uponelist

>To: Listen-Uponelist

>Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>Date: Fri, 3 Mar 2000 23:59:19 -0500

>

>, thanks for your answer. It is really frustrating, isn't it,

>not knowing what to attribute to the deafness and what is

>developmental? I have similar issues with my mostly hearing

>daughter, i.e. is her behavior due to a developmental stage, or is it

>an issue that needs additional attention? The hearing issues only

>compound it. Right now, my son and I are both frustrated with his

>lack of communication ability (I'm just learning sign, and so far

>he's shown no interest in picking it up); he'll drag me to the pantry

>if he wants to eat, to the fridge if he's thirsty; he'll bat away

>what he doesn't want and take what he does. So apart from my anxiety

>over whether he has the ability to learn spoken language, I'm

>frustrated that I can't understand what he wants/needs, which in turn

>frustrates him, which means I listen to a lot of whining/crying,

>which makes me a less than patient and wonderful mother. Ok, so now

>I'M venting, so enough from me! Thanks again for sharing --

>

>Stefanie

>

> >

> >

> >Stefanie, I have no idea. This big wig ped. neuro pshych did some evals

>on

> >him and said that he may have this even if he were hearing. But, like I

> >say, I think alot of his language and behavior issues come from

>frustration,

> >I dont necissarily believe that he would have delays or behavior problems

>if

> >he were hearing. It is all sooooo frustrating. If I can find a

> >professional who knows anything about deaf children, he doesnt know

>anything

> >about other issues, if I can find one who knows something about behavior

> >/lang. issues, they cant relate it to deaf children. They all say (or

> >imply) well he is deaf, duh, of course he has language and behavior

>issues.

> >Not the case, I dont believe, I know of many deaf kids who are right up

>with

> >language and have no other issues, one of them lives in my house ! Our

> >daughter has always been way ahead with lang (sign) and is very " typical "

> >for a deaf child. UUUUUHHHH! Sorry, I am venting today, have a good

>day,

> >

>

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[Guest guest]

, thanks for your answer. It is really frustrating, isn't it,

not knowing what to attribute to the deafness and what is

developmental? I have similar issues with my mostly hearing

daughter, i.e. is her behavior due to a developmental stage, or is it

an issue that needs additional attention? The hearing issues only

compound it. Right now, my son and I are both frustrated with his

lack of communication ability (I'm just learning sign, and so far

he's shown no interest in picking it up); he'll drag me to the pantry

if he wants to eat, to the fridge if he's thirsty; he'll bat away

what he doesn't want and take what he does. So apart from my anxiety

over whether he has the ability to learn spoken language, I'm

frustrated that I can't understand what he wants/needs, which in turn

frustrates him, which means I listen to a lot of whining/crying,

which makes me a less than patient and wonderful mother. Ok, so now

I'M venting, so enough from me! Thanks again for sharing --

Stefanie

>

>

>Stefanie, I have no idea. This big wig ped. neuro pshych did some evals on

>him and said that he may have this even if he were hearing. But, like I

>say, I think alot of his language and behavior issues come from frustration,

>I dont necissarily believe that he would have delays or behavior problems if

>he were hearing. It is all sooooo frustrating. If I can find a

>professional who knows anything about deaf children, he doesnt know anything

>about other issues, if I can find one who knows something about behavior

>/lang. issues, they cant relate it to deaf children. They all say (or

>imply) well he is deaf, duh, of course he has language and behavior issues.

>Not the case, I dont believe, I know of many deaf kids who are right up with

>language and have no other issues, one of them lives in my house ! Our

>daughter has always been way ahead with lang (sign) and is very " typical "

>for a deaf child. UUUUUHHHH! Sorry, I am venting today, have a good day,

>

[Guest guest]

,

I went through the same thing with Lukas when he first started learning

sign. And, while this may sound cruel, I learned that I had to demand

language from him. If he is in the kitchen pillaging through the cupboards

or fridge, once you finally figure out what he wants, hold it up and sign

what it is, and sign " oh, cookie, you want a cookie " , and wait for him to at

least attempt to sign something. If he wont, no cookie, or if you think

that is too mean, get behind him and help him make the sign. We have been

going through this for six years, six long years! As I said, Lukas has a

lang delay, so it has taken him a long time to learn that language is a

powerful tool. He would come up to me and scream to get my attention, then

sign one word, and I had to figure out the rest. Well, you know what?

Lukas is turning seven this month and he FINALLY understands that he has to

sign " I want cookie please " . He just woke up one day recently and realized

that he really can communicate in complete thoughts. If your son can get

what he wants from screaming and pointing, then he wont sign. It took me

too long to realize this. My daughter is completely opposite. She has been

signing since she was nine months old. Boys are diffrent. But IT DOES GET

BETTER. I held my breath waiting for the day when I could actually have a

conversation with my son, and now I tear up, just about every time he tells

me a story or a thought. Also, one more thing, I know your son is just

little, but we found that as soon as we introduced Lukas to written

language, it just gave him one more tool for lang. that he can relate to

sign and use accordingly. We have the captioning on all the time, and label

everything. He loves me to draw pictures and label all the parts. It has

also been really helpful for our family to draw pictures for use in

explaining things. For example, if he is going to a birthday party, draw a

picture of kids and cake and balloons, etc, sign all the words. This also

works for heading off bad behavior, draw a picture of the bad behavior, then

cross it out and be very dramatic in doing it.

Believe me, I completely understand whining and crying and being sick and

tired of it. Even my daughter with HIGH language screams and whines

constantly, (she thinks I neglect her). Good Luck, I know it is a strugle,

but keep learnig sign and feeding it to your son (and your daughter, too,

she could be a big help in teaching your son). It is such a joy when his

face lights up because he finally gets it! Bye,

Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>

>

> , thanks for your answer. It is really frustrating, isn't it,

> not knowing what to attribute to the deafness and what is

> developmental? I have similar issues with my mostly hearing

> daughter, i.e. is her behavior due to a developmental stage, or is it

> an issue that needs additional attention? The hearing issues only

> compound it. Right now, my son and I are both frustrated with his

> lack of communication ability (I'm just learning sign, and so far

> he's shown no interest in picking it up); he'll drag me to the pantry

> if he wants to eat, to the fridge if he's thirsty; he'll bat away

> what he doesn't want and take what he does. So apart from my anxiety

> over whether he has the ability to learn spoken language, I'm

> frustrated that I can't understand what he wants/needs, which in turn

> frustrates him, which means I listen to a lot of whining/crying,

> which makes me a less than patient and wonderful mother. Ok, so now

> I'M venting, so enough from me! Thanks again for sharing --

>

> Stefanie

>

> >

> >

> >Stefanie, I have no idea. This big wig ped. neuro pshych did some evals

on

> >him and said that he may have this even if he were hearing. But, like I

> >say, I think alot of his language and behavior issues come from

frustration,

> >I dont necissarily believe that he would have delays or behavior problems

if

> >he were hearing. It is all sooooo frustrating. If I can find a

> >professional who knows anything about deaf children, he doesnt know

anything

> >about other issues, if I can find one who knows something about behavior

> >/lang. issues, they cant relate it to deaf children. They all say (or

> >imply) well he is deaf, duh, of course he has language and behavior

issues.

> >Not the case, I dont believe, I know of many deaf kids who are right up

with

> >language and have no other issues, one of them lives in my house ! Our

> >daughter has always been way ahead with lang (sign) and is very " typical "

> >for a deaf child. UUUUUHHHH! Sorry, I am venting today, have a good

day,

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

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> Get a NextCard Visa, in 30 seconds! Get rates as low as

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> All messages posted to this list are private and confidential. Each post

is the intellectual property of the author and therefore subject to

copyright restrictions.

>

>

[Guest guest]

We have to do the same thing with . But instead of sign, she has to

say the words. I used to feel guilty until I realized the it was the only

way she would learn what she had to do to get what she wanted. But once she

gets it, she always says it.

Sheri

[Guest guest]

,

No, what you do/did to help your son to communicate is not cruel. We had

to do the same thing with our daughter. We made her ask for what she

wanted at the table instead of jumping up and running around the table; if

she didn't ask (in sign for her) , she didn't get it. To help you put it

in perspective, would you let your hearing children demand and scream for

what they want? It not only promotes bad manners but also allows them to

not use their language that they will need in life.

----------

>

> To: Listen-Uponelist

> Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

> Date: Saturday, March 04, 2000 7:57 AM

>

>

>

> ,

> I went through the same thing with Lukas when he first started learning

> sign. And, while this may sound cruel, I learned that I had to demand

> language from him. If he is in the kitchen pillaging through the

cupboards

> or fridge, once you finally figure out what he wants, hold it up and sign

> what it is, and sign " oh, cookie, you want a cookie " , and wait for him to

at

> least attempt to sign something. If he wont, no cookie, or if you think

> that is too mean, get behind him and help him make the sign. We have been

> going through this for six years, six long years! As I said, Lukas has a

> lang delay, so it has taken him a long time to learn that language is a

> powerful tool. He would come up to me and scream to get my attention,

then

> sign one word, and I had to figure out the rest. Well, you know what?

> Lukas is turning seven this month and he FINALLY understands that he has

to

> sign " I want cookie please " . He just woke up one day recently and

realized

> that he really can communicate in complete thoughts. If your son can get

> what he wants from screaming and pointing, then he wont sign. It took me

> too long to realize this. My daughter is completely opposite. She has

been

> signing since she was nine months old. Boys are diffrent. But IT DOES

GET

> BETTER. I held my breath waiting for the day when I could actually have

a

> conversation with my son, and now I tear up, just about every time he

tells

> me a story or a thought. Also, one more thing, I know your son is just

> little, but we found that as soon as we introduced Lukas to written

> language, it just gave him one more tool for lang. that he can relate to

> sign and use accordingly. We have the captioning on all the time, and

label

> everything. He loves me to draw pictures and label all the parts. It

has

> also been really helpful for our family to draw pictures for use in

> explaining things. For example, if he is going to a birthday party, draw

a

> picture of kids and cake and balloons, etc, sign all the words. This

also

> works for heading off bad behavior, draw a picture of the bad behavior,

then

> cross it out and be very dramatic in doing it.

> Believe me, I completely understand whining and crying and being sick and

> tired of it. Even my daughter with HIGH language screams and whines

> constantly, (she thinks I neglect her). Good Luck, I know it is a

strugle,

> but keep learnig sign and feeding it to your son (and your daughter, too,

> she could be a big help in teaching your son). It is such a joy when his

> face lights up because he finally gets it! Bye,

> Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>

>

> >

> >

> > , thanks for your answer. It is really frustrating, isn't it,

> > not knowing what to attribute to the deafness and what is

> > developmental? I have similar issues with my mostly hearing

> > daughter, i.e. is her behavior due to a developmental stage, or is it

> > an issue that needs additional attention? The hearing issues only

> > compound it. Right now, my son and I are both frustrated with his

> > lack of communication ability (I'm just learning sign, and so far

> > he's shown no interest in picking it up); he'll drag me to the pantry

> > if he wants to eat, to the fridge if he's thirsty; he'll bat away

> > what he doesn't want and take what he does. So apart from my anxiety

> > over whether he has the ability to learn spoken language, I'm

> > frustrated that I can't understand what he wants/needs, which in turn

> > frustrates him, which means I listen to a lot of whining/crying,

> > which makes me a less than patient and wonderful mother. Ok, so now

> > I'M venting, so enough from me! Thanks again for sharing --

> >

> > Stefanie

> >

> > >

> > >

> > >Stefanie, I have no idea. This big wig ped. neuro pshych did some

evals

> on

> > >him and said that he may have this even if he were hearing. But, like

I

> > >say, I think alot of his language and behavior issues come from

> frustration,

> > >I dont necissarily believe that he would have delays or behavior

problems

> if

> > >he were hearing. It is all sooooo frustrating. If I can find a

> > >professional who knows anything about deaf children, he doesnt know

> anything

> > >about other issues, if I can find one who knows something about

behavior

> > >/lang. issues, they cant relate it to deaf children. They all say (or

> > >imply) well he is deaf, duh, of course he has language and behavior

> issues.

> > >Not the case, I dont believe, I know of many deaf kids who are right

up

> with

> > >language and have no other issues, one of them lives in my house !

Our

> > >daughter has always been way ahead with lang (sign) and is very

" typical "

> > >for a deaf child. UUUUUHHHH! Sorry, I am venting today, have a good

> day,

> > >

> >

> >

> >

------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > MAXIMIZE YOUR CARD, MINIMIZE YOUR RATE!

> > Get a NextCard Visa, in 30 seconds! Get rates as low as

> > 0.0% Intro or 9.9% Fixed APR and no hidden fees.

> > Apply NOW!

> > http://click./1/2122/1/_/440511/_/952146198/

> >

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[Guest guest]

Thanks for all your comments. It helps to know I'm not the only one facing

this problem. Let me share some good news with you all, especially those

of you with children who have recently been diagnosed with hearing

impairments.

A few weeks ago when I visited Sabreen's school, it was report card day

and the children were in the hall racing for their respective school buses

etc. I came upon a group of 5 hearing impaired kids who were comparing

report cards with one another. They all rushed forward waving their

reports cards screaming or signing " Look Mrs. Reza, we all got straight

A's. " I can't tell you how wonderful it felt to hear those words. These

children all have various levels of hearing impairment and are

mainstreamed. They have interpreters to sign for them in their classes and

receive speech therapy and extra communication arts with their hearing

impaired teacher, but none of them receive modified instruction. Mind you,

our school district is pretty tough and I know many of the hearing kids

didn't do as well on their report cards, so basically these 5 hearing

impaired kids probably did better then a cross section of the hearing

kids. So on the days that I get really frustrated and am on the verge of

tears, I think back on that moment and try to remember that with the help

of God, our kids have the ability to accomplish a great deal.

[Guest guest]

>,

Thanks for all this great info; I know I need to start forcing him to

communicate in a clearer fashion, it's my own fault for being so lazy

about it. And I like the idea of labeling things. I just feel so

frustrated that I know so little sign, and that it's such a struggle

for me to learn this whole new language -- and I'm supposed to be

teaching it to HIM! I feel like someone said to me " Here's your new

baby; by the way, you're going to need to learn Spanish because

that's the first language he'll be able to use! " And I wasted all

that time learning French!

Anyway, thanks for the suggestions -- I'll let you know how it goes!

Stefanie

>

>

>,

>I went through the same thing with Lukas when he first started learning

>sign. And, while this may sound cruel, I learned that I had to demand

>language from him. If he is in the kitchen pillaging through the cupboards

>or fridge, once you finally figure out what he wants, hold it up and sign

>what it is, and sign " oh, cookie, you want a cookie " , and wait for him to at

>least attempt to sign something. If he wont, no cookie, or if you think

>that is too mean, get behind him and help him make the sign. We have been

>going through this for six years, six long years! As I said, Lukas has a

>lang delay, so it has taken him a long time to learn that language is a

>powerful tool. He would come up to me and scream to get my attention, then

>sign one word, and I had to figure out the rest. Well, you know what?

>Lukas is turning seven this month and he FINALLY understands that he has to

>sign " I want cookie please " . He just woke up one day recently and realized

>that he really can communicate in complete thoughts. If your son can get

>what he wants from screaming and pointing, then he wont sign. It took me

>too long to realize this. My daughter is completely opposite. She has been

>signing since she was nine months old. Boys are diffrent. But IT DOES GET

>BETTER. I held my breath waiting for the day when I could actually have a

>conversation with my son, and now I tear up, just about every time he tells

>me a story or a thought. Also, one more thing, I know your son is just

>little, but we found that as soon as we introduced Lukas to written

>language, it just gave him one more tool for lang. that he can relate to

>sign and use accordingly. We have the captioning on all the time, and label

>everything. He loves me to draw pictures and label all the parts. It has

>also been really helpful for our family to draw pictures for use in

>explaining things. For example, if he is going to a birthday party, draw a

>picture of kids and cake and balloons, etc, sign all the words. This also

>works for heading off bad behavior, draw a picture of the bad behavior, then

>cross it out and be very dramatic in doing it.

>Believe me, I completely understand whining and crying and being sick and

>tired of it. Even my daughter with HIGH language screams and whines

>constantly, (she thinks I neglect her). Good Luck, I know it is a strugle,

>but keep learnig sign and feeding it to your son (and your daughter, too,

>she could be a big help in teaching your son). It is such a joy when his

>face lights up because he finally gets it! Bye,

> Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

[Guest guest]

Good for you . I think I have a link to a deaf female firefighter (or

maybe Kay does) from another list. Also, I personally knew a deaf guy in

the land area who was a firefighter.

mary

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Uponelist

>To: Listen-Uponelist

>Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>Date: Tue, 7 Mar 2000 05:46:25 -0800 (PST)

>

>you wrote----

>but a hearing disability should not impede

> > on ANYTHING your

> > child wants to do.

>

>That is exactly what I try and get thru to my son and

>the rest of the family. If there is one thing that I

>strictly enforce it is the fact that can do

>anything he wants to in life. I remember at the

>beginning of the school year they had a career day and

>had to tell what their mom and dad did. told

>his class that his dad was in the Navy and his mom was

>a firefighter and rode an ambulance. It later got back

>to me that a teaching assistant asked him if he

>understood that he could never be in the Navy or be a

>firefighter. Boy, was I hopping mad. I flew into that

>school the next day and had a few words with her. I

>shared with her that although he will never be able to

>go into the military he sure as heck can be a

>firefighter if he chooses that path. Then I proceeded

>to tell her there was a book out by a

>firefighter/paramedic who has been in the fire service

>for 20 yrs or so and guess what--he's deaf!!! I let

>her know if she ever told my son he couldnt do

>anything there were going to be major problems!!

>

>Sorry to ramble on but thats just one thing that gets

>me really worked up. All 3 of my children know that

>life is what you make of it--none of us are perfect

>and we all have to work for what we want it life,

>regardless of any disability one might have!

>

> J.

>--- P Rosenthal wrote:

> > Stefanie:

> >

> > As a hearing impaired mom of a hearing impaired 4

> > year old, I agree with

> > the suggestion about lipreading. As my hearing got

> > progressively worse

> > over the years, I've been able to function

> > reasonably well in most

> > instances because I already had lipreading skills

> > from a young age. In

> > many situations, I do better than my husband who has

> > a moderate hearing

> > loss (I'm profound) because he can't lip read!

> >

> > Are you planning to teach your child to speak orally

> > as well as sign? My

> > daughter only had 10 to 15 words when her loss was

> > diagnosed at 23

> > months and now she is speaking up a storm despite

> > having to race against

> > her rapidly progressive hearing loss.

> >

> > A word of advice about labeling and withholding

> > until your child says or

> > signs the word. This method does not work with every

> > child or with every

> > person who does this with your child. My daughter

> > clammed up when the

> > SLP at her first oral program tried to withhold toys

> > until she named

> > them. It just made her more stubborn in her refusal

> > to say anything. I

> > spoke with my private SLP about it and she said that

> > with my child, you

> > have to move on to the next object if she won't

> > repeat it after a few

> > tries. That doesn't mean the child should get the

> > object, just put it

> > away and try with a new one. Staying on the same

> > object too long becomes

> > a battle of wills.

> >

> > BTW, deaf and HOH children can go on to college and

> > graduate school

> > nowadays (ha ha). I know, bc I did. It doesn't mean

> > the road there will

> > be easy, but a hearing disability should not impede

> > on ANYTHING your

> > child wants to do. I've always thought of hearing

> > loss as one of the

> > more minor disabilities.

> >

> > Good luck with your son!

> >

> > a

> >

> >

>__________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/7/2000 12:44:24 AM Eastern Standard Time,

info@... writes:

<< My daughter clammed up when the

SLP at her first oral program tried to withhold toys until she named

them. It just made her more stubborn in her refusal to say anything. >>

a,

This is exactly what my son was put through in speech therapy. He had to say

it or else. He spent more time in time out than doing therapy, which was

fine with him. At home it is give and take. I've learned to pick my battles

with him. Besides, if he thinks he won sometimes he is easier to deal with.

Right now his object of desire is a Playstation so all I have to say is " If

you want to play with your games you have to finish therapy. " Works so far

but I am sure this too will pass.

At the dentist today he never said a word to the staff but as soon as I came

back to talk with the dentist he started talking away. His hygienist, ,

had been joking with him and asked him if he talked and he nodded no. She

said " Well look at that Dr. H. he can talk " When she said that Jake started

laughing and finally said something to her. " Ha, ha I talk! "

Elaine

[Guest guest]

You go girl!!!!!

Tracey

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Uponelist

>To: Listen-Uponelist

>Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>Date: Tue, 7 Mar 2000 05:46:25 -0800 (PST)

>MIME-Version: 1.0

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>Message-ID:

>Mailing-List: list Listen-Uponelist; contact

>Listen-Up-owneronelist

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>X-eGroups-

>

>you wrote----

>but a hearing disability should not impede

> > on ANYTHING your

> > child wants to do.

>

>That is exactly what I try and get thru to my son and

>the rest of the family. If there is one thing that I

>strictly enforce it is the fact that can do

>anything he wants to in life. I remember at the

>beginning of the school year they had a career day and

>had to tell what their mom and dad did. told

>his class that his dad was in the Navy and his mom was

>a firefighter and rode an ambulance. It later got back

>to me that a teaching assistant asked him if he

>understood that he could never be in the Navy or be a

>firefighter. Boy, was I hopping mad. I flew into that

>school the next day and had a few words with her. I

>shared with her that although he will never be able to

>go into the military he sure as heck can be a

>firefighter if he chooses that path. Then I proceeded

>to tell her there was a book out by a

>firefighter/paramedic who has been in the fire service

>for 20 yrs or so and guess what--he's deaf!!! I let

>her know if she ever told my son he couldnt do

>anything there were going to be major problems!!

>

>Sorry to ramble on but thats just one thing that gets

>me really worked up. All 3 of my children know that

>life is what you make of it--none of us are perfect

>and we all have to work for what we want it life,

>regardless of any disability one might have!

>

> J.

>--- P Rosenthal wrote:

> > Stefanie:

> >

> > As a hearing impaired mom of a hearing impaired 4

> > year old, I agree with

> > the suggestion about lipreading. As my hearing got

> > progressively worse

> > over the years, I've been able to function

> > reasonably well in most

> > instances because I already had lipreading skills

> > from a young age. In

> > many situations, I do better than my husband who has

> > a moderate hearing

> > loss (I'm profound) because he can't lip read!

> >

> > Are you planning to teach your child to speak orally

> > as well as sign? My

> > daughter only had 10 to 15 words when her loss was

> > diagnosed at 23

> > months and now she is speaking up a storm despite

> > having to race against

> > her rapidly progressive hearing loss.

> >

> > A word of advice about labeling and withholding

> > until your child says or

> > signs the word. This method does not work with every

> > child or with every

> > person who does this with your child. My daughter

> > clammed up when the

> > SLP at her first oral program tried to withhold toys

> > until she named

> > them. It just made her more stubborn in her refusal

> > to say anything. I

> > spoke with my private SLP about it and she said that

> > with my child, you

> > have to move on to the next object if she won't

> > repeat it after a few

> > tries. That doesn't mean the child should get the

> > object, just put it

> > away and try with a new one. Staying on the same

> > object too long becomes

> > a battle of wills.

> >

> > BTW, deaf and HOH children can go on to college and

> > graduate school

> > nowadays (ha ha). I know, bc I did. It doesn't mean

> > the road there will

> > be easy, but a hearing disability should not impede

> > on ANYTHING your

> > child wants to do. I've always thought of hearing

> > loss as one of the

> > more minor disabilities.

> >

> > Good luck with your son!

> >

> > a

> >

> >

>__________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

Elaine:

Kids are smart aren't they? They're just acting like typical young

children who don't want to " perform " on demand. Luckily, my daughter

loves her new school and though it is all therapy (plus 3 recess

periods), she doesn't think of it as work, just play.

I remember a while back you were inquiring about the e School in

ville. Are you moving there? The one in NYC isn't fully opened

yet due to licensing red tape. I had hoped my daugher would go there,

but they evaluated her last Spring and said she was doing too well

compared to the other applicants! A mixed blessing to be sure since she

still had a significant speech and language delay. Hence, we relocated

to St Louis for the Moog School.

a

[Guest guest]

>,

Where do I find out more about cued speech, and how to learn it?

Thanks,

Stefanie

>

>

>Stefanie,

>You might want to check into cued speech. It only takes a few days to

>learn the system and about 6 months to a year to become fluent. It's a

>visual modality of communication that uses handshapes and face touches

>to indicate which sounds are coming out of your mouth when you speak.

>Since it represents sounds and not words, you can cue in any language.

>It also allows you to teach your child phonetics and reading

>phonetically. You then still have the option of learning and teaching

>your child sign since you're already able to communicate with them by

>about the third day of learning to cue. It really helps them learn to

>lipread too.

>

[Guest guest]

>a,

Yes, my goal is for my son to be oral; from everything I've heard, he

should be able to be oral (he's severe/moderately severe, but seems

to hear quite a bit with his aids). But since he's 18 months and

still only babbling, with an occasional word here and there, I want

to give him other ways to communicate, for his comfort and mine.

Plus I want to plan ahead, in case his loss is progressive.

Thanks for the advice about pushing him -- I know if it were my

daughter, she would also dig her heels in, so I'll be careful to

watch for signs of that. My goal is not to frustrate him, but to

strongly encourage him to communicate clearly. Right now, banging on

the pantry door and saying " uh, uh, uh " just isn't clear enough for

me!

I'm REALLY glad to hear you say you think of hearing loss as a " more

minor disability " ; so far, he shows signs of being able to everything

else, so I'm hoping this is something we all just learn to work with,

and let him know he can achieve whatever he sets his mind to.

Thanks again for your help --

Stefanie

>

>

>Stefanie:

>

>As a hearing impaired mom of a hearing impaired 4 year old, I agree with

>the suggestion about lipreading. As my hearing got progressively worse

>over the years, I've been able to function reasonably well in most

>instances because I already had lipreading skills from a young age. In

>many situations, I do better than my husband who has a moderate hearing

>loss (I'm profound) because he can't lip read!

>

>Are you planning to teach your child to speak orally as well as sign? My

>daughter only had 10 to 15 words when her loss was diagnosed at 23

>months and now she is speaking up a storm despite having to race against

>her rapidly progressive hearing loss.

>

>A word of advice about labeling and withholding until your child says or

>signs the word. This method does not work with every child or with every

>person who does this with your child. My daughter clammed up when the

>SLP at her first oral program tried to withhold toys until she named

>them. It just made her more stubborn in her refusal to say anything. I

>spoke with my private SLP about it and she said that with my child, you

>have to move on to the next object if she won't repeat it after a few

>tries. That doesn't mean the child should get the object, just put it

>away and try with a new one. Staying on the same object too long becomes

>a battle of wills.

>

>BTW, deaf and HOH children can go on to college and graduate school

>nowadays (ha ha). I know, bc I did. It doesn't mean the road there will

>be easy, but a hearing disability should not impede on ANYTHING your

>child wants to do. I've always thought of hearing loss as one of the

>more minor disabilities.

>

>Good luck with your son!

>

>a

[Guest guest]

>I wanted to say I'm glad to hear both perspectives on this, from

>a and Chris. I think that's the beauty of this list: there are

>a wide variety of people who come from different experiences. I

>thank you both for sharing.

Stefanie

[Guest guest]

At 11:36 PM 3/8/00 -0500, you wrote:

>com>

>To: Listen-Uponelist

>MIME-Version: 1.0

>Mailing-List: list Listen-Uponelist; contact Listen-Up-owneronelist

>Delivered-To: mailing list Listen-Uponelist

>Precedence: bulk

>List-Unsubscribe: <mailto:Listen-Up-unsubscribeonelist>

>Date: Wed, 8 Mar 2000 23:36:07 -0500

>X-eGroups-

>

>Reply-To: Listen-Uponelist

>Subject: Re: Re: Digest 426 - focusing issues

>Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii

>Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit

>X-RCPT-TO:

>X-UIDL: 893061701

>Status: U

>

>

>

> >I wanted to say I'm glad to hear both perspectives on this, from

> >a and Chris. I think that's the beauty of this list: there are

> >a wide variety of people who come from different experiences. I

> >thank you both for sharing.

Your welcome. I did not intend to agitate anyone here, especially the

listowner. It was an opinion, intended for discussion.

My apologies to all.

Chris

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