Re: Marie- ARGH My husband

[Guest guest]

Oh my hun... this is just awful.... I do know where you are coming from.. have you asked him why he is not talking to you... have you thought back to think what caused him to become silent... this is just bad. Don't take it out on yourself,,, you know it has got to be hurting him as well.. otherwise he would not be so quiet with you. You know he loves ya,,,, so he is hurting ... but he shouldn't be hurting you. Do you have any mutual friends that would know what is going on that you could talk to .. or that they could talk to him and see what is going on. I am so sorry that you have to go through this. Something is going to have to give here somewhere. Sooner or later he has got to talk to you. Just hang in there.. keep praying that you will know what to do and don't blame yourself... IT takes two always. hugs you and I will be here a bit if you need to talk .. hugs

Huggles you lots

Sophia

-- Marie- ARGH My husband

Marie,

I can't believe that he is still being an ass today. He never carries it on this long. You would think with the way HE is acting that I did something to him or that I started this.

He is the one that came home from work on Sunday evening all pissy, bitched about the dinner that I had cooked and had waiting for him, then didn't speak to me the rest of the night. Hmm. Then Monday, he left for work before 5 am so I know I didn't say or do anything to him then. He went to his mother's for lunch (or breakfast since it was so early. When he goes in at 5 he gets his "lunch break at 9 am) anyway.... He comes home at 3pm, I was asleep. I felt terrible and knew that he was aware of the way I was feeling so I just stayed in bed. Then at 5 I heard him in the kitchen preparing dinner, I went to the restroom, brushed my teeth and waited for him to let me know dinner was done (as he normally would when he cooks a meal or like I would when I cook a meal) NO.. He ate, left his mess and grease all over the kitchen and went to watch TV til about 8. When he did come downstairs, he didn't say a word to me, not Hi... not how are you... not even F*c* U.... He stayed in the same area as me for another 4 hours and didn't say ONE word to me!! So, I went upstairs and left a letter in the bathroom for him to see either before he went to bed or the next morning if he didn't feel like reading it that night. I also mentioned in the letter that he had better plan on cleaning up HIS mess in the kitchen because I was not.

This morning, he got up at 9. I went upstairs and took my meds at 9:15, then came back down. He still didn't speak to me. He got bathed and dressed around 1pm. I did too. Then I got my stuff and said BYE as I was walking out the door. He still said nothing to me. I worked till 9pm. He was on the computer and not speaking to me when I got home. He had however cleaned up his mess in the kitchen. He just went to bed about an hour ago, without one word to me.

What bothers me is, if I was supporting myself financially, I would not put up with this bullshit at all. I would go to a hotel and wait for him to apologize or leave me. Instead, I am trapped unless I want to go to a shelter and give up visitation with my children. Of course, things being like this with the person that I have loved and trusted more than anyone else before in my life is devastating too. How can I make him see the error of his ways and make him appreciate what he has in me, when I can't even stand on my own two feet anymore?!

I hate it! I hate being sick! I hate having almost no income. I hate fighting with my husband. I hate not being able to tell him to go screw himself. I hate feeling as if I am losing my best friend. It is times like this that I get extremely suicidal, so consider this your warning.

I don't have the emotional strength anymore to deal with these kind of games. I put up with 12 years of emotional and verbal abuse from my X plus 15 years of physical, emotional and verbal abuse from my mother.... I don't have anymore energy for this shit!!

Hubby thinks since I don't cry and don't get overly emotional like he does, that I'm cold or somehow don't care as much. If he only knew how bad he makes me feel. I don't show it much, I just snap and one day that "snap" will be the end. Would hate to think his last memory will be of us fighting over something as stupid as whatever he is ticked off about.

Thanks for the ears.........

Alenna --------------------------------------------------

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"When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us." Helen Keller (1880 - 1968)

Re: ARGH My husband

Alenna:

(((((ALenna))))

I can so relate to you.. sounds like yours is being just as selfish and rotten as mine is beng..

you keep venting and know that we are all here to listen. and we all love you and understand..

Gentle Hug's

Marie

pretty_n_cute2002@... messanger same name'smarieava@...my_blue_eyes67@...1. While it is wonderful to share our experiences with everyone on the list as to what treatments do and don't work for us, pls always check with your dr. Some treatments are dangerous when given along with other meds as well as to certain health conditions or just dangerous in general.2. If you are in a difficult situation (doesn't matter what it is) pls don't be afraid to ask for help. It is the first step to trying to make that situation better.Have a nice day everyone.

[Guest guest]

Alenna:

I support you holehardedly..

I can totaly understand the situation you are in.. and I am with you all the way..

You should not half to give in to him.. I am ALWAYS the one who gives in just to keep the peace. but not this time. he can be pissed off at me all he want's. and say what he please's.. I REFUSE TO GIVE IN THIS TIME.. I have been giving in and giving up for way too long..

I have an Illness weather he can understand that or not..(and I know he understand's) he and I just have diffrent view's on illness.

It really sound's to me like your hubby know's how to push all your button's.. god I know how that work's. Jake deffinatly knows how to push all my button's. he knit pick's and drive's me totaly crazy...

I am the dooer in this family.. I have ALWAYS take care of every one.. Took care of my mom who had Fibro, and many many other health condition's. till she died in may of 94.. ammediatly after she died.. I had to take care of all the arrangement's quit my Job driving truck. making 1400.00 a week to cleaning house's here in town for 50,00 a week. Just so I could stay home and Take Care of my Dad.. I also ended up taking Care of My beloved mother in law. till she died in may of 95.. then I took care of my father in law. for 6 months after he was injured at work.. Then I ended up moving back to Michigan for three months to take care of my aunt. who had also raised me. till I was 13.. she died in March of 99.. then came back to Illinois and took care of my sister in law till July 99 when she finaly died of cancer.. I had finaly had enough told my dad. Jake and my in laws enough was enough. I went back to work driving truck.. I was ran off the road.. in Dec. of 99. my Semi rolled over.. It is amazing I was not killed.. the Paremdic's. Police and people who stopped to help could not believe I was a live.. I ended up loosing my job.. I was petrified to get back in a nother vehicle even my own car.. I was treated for a concusion, Post Traumatic Stress. Rotary cuff Injury.. Broken Ankle.. soft tissue injuries and so on and so on.. In Febuary of 2000 Jake started having health problem's. me being the nurse in the family I thought he was having stroke's.. But he wasn't in May of 2000 he was dnxd. with Multiple Sclerosis. since he was dnxd. he has become something else to live with.. he goes from being my best friend to being the biggest pain in my ass. If I was able to make my own living believe me I would not be here.. I would deffinatly be on my own..

But we all do what we half to do for us.. only the person in the situation knows whats best for them.. not everything is easy for every one..

oh geeze I am rambling again..

I am sorry.. Just know that I know what you are going through.. and I support you one hundred percent..

Gentle Hug's

Marie

AOL. marieavaYahoo. pretty_n_cute2002

[Guest guest]

Marie,

You have been through so much with taking care of others and then your accident and injuries. I don't blame you about not wanting to take any crap. When he gets crappy, remind him of all you did do over the years and that you took care of his parents. He should be grateful you are alive after what happened. You've already done enough work for an entire life, he shouldn't be griping at you now that you are sick. The trauma and stress of everything could be why you have the FMS in the first place. Arghhhh, men!

hugs,

Sundra

____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here

[Guest guest]

Alenna,

Hugs to you hun... you have had a rough time. I wish I could help to take care of you Be good to yourself and I hope that this all comes back to you 10 fold... hugs for your sacrifices and your caring heart May you be surely blessed:)

Huggles you lots

Sophia