RE: New to Group

[Guest guest]

You need to get out of there. You're too enmeshed in this

emotionally volatile and unhealthy situation. (I read your other

post before I read this one.)

You need to live your own life. I think on some level, you know

that. The prospect of living on your own must scare you because 1)

you've stayed in this situation for the last 5 years, and 2) you

keep wanting to change THEM so that it would be easier to stay,

instead of looking at the natural option to leave and strike out on

your own. It's just easier to manage them, right?

If I were you, I'd take the time to ask myself: Is this the life

you want? The preferred victim of a BPD father? Getting into daily

arguments with a man whose emotional age is that of an angry

child?

There's a big world out there just waiting for you to go out and

take a bite out of it. Why retreat from it and settle for this

insanity? Maybe a good therapist can help you sort out what is

scaring you about living on your own.

Sure, it looks like you've got a free place to live -- but even your

computer is in their house, making you further enmeshed with them.

It seems you've settled for this living arrangement at a HUGE cost

to your well-being, emotional health and sanity, which is priceless.

It's as if you've faded into the background of their life. What

about YOUR life? You were born with the basic human right of having

your own life in the world -- every human being is created with

special talents and gifts, and there is a life out there waiting for

you that uses your talents and gifts. The aspects of you that make

you unique -- that make you YOU. I hate to see it buried beneath

the overpowering presence of a BPD.

-Kyla