Guest guest Posted December 25, 2007 Report Share Posted December 25, 2007 My advice is first before I could learn to trust someone else I had to learn to trust myself. I also had to surround myself with trusting people. To me I need to first see trust and how someone trusts another before I can do this myself. Do you have anyone in your life you trust? If so I would spend lots of time analyzing that person and why you trust them. Then I would try to intergrate that person's qualities that you trust into the trust you have for yourself. Once you do this you will be able to start to look at trusting qualities in your boyfriend instead of focusing on those things you are seeing that you perceive to be untrustworthy. ANother thing that might help is to identify what qualities he has that you find to be untrustworthy and then find out where this perception comes from. If his actions have not been untrustworthy then what is it about him or your perception of the things he says or does that makes you feel this way? Hope this helps. Kelley To: WTOAdultChildren1@...: c_mh13@...: Mon, 24 Dec 2007 07:55:21 +0000Subject: new and need advice i found out only a couple days ago that BPD existed and i have been reading stop walking on eggshells. i feel so relieved because it fits my mom exactly and i can finally understand why she acts the way she does. but my most immediate problem is with my boyfriend. im not sure if it has something to do with being raised by someone with BPD, but i have the HARDEST time trusting him and it really hurts and frustrates him that i don't. i want to trust him so bad, and logically i know i can but every time i start to i just get this overwheliming panic feeling and start questioning where he's at or what he's doing. im just so afraid that something would happen to mess up the relationship. i really want to trust him and i know i can, but i just can't ignore that feeling sometimes. and it's starting to affect our relationship. i love him so much and i don't want to hurt him like that. and i don't want him to start pushing me away because of it. does anyone have any insight into this or any advice on where to go from here? _________________________________________________________________ Don't get caught with egg on your face. Play Chicktionary! http://club.live.com/chicktionary.aspx?icid=chick_wlhmtextlink1_dec Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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