Guest guest Posted April 11, 2002 Report Share Posted April 11, 2002 Moe, IMHO, Follow your instincts. And TRY your hardest to start accumulating evidence on the things you've told us...in case she tells the judge she wants to live there. If you can prove it's not a good environment, it won't matter what your daughter wants. Keep a journal....write down dates times places, witnesses to all these things, the more you can prove and the more documentation you have, the better off you will be, and your daughter. And DO NOT feeling guilty about leaving your daughter home alone for short periods of time. 12 (again, depends on maturity level) in my opinion, is old enough to take care of themselves for short periods of time. Take care and follow your heart, you are a good person. --- moe wrote: > Hi everyone. > I haven't been posting to much but I need to ask > for your all's help and opinions on this. My middle > daughter is wanting to move in with her dad and his > wife. I don't want her too. Not because her dad > remarried. Here are my reasons, when I was > homeless, he wouldn't take the girls with him until > I could find us a place to live. He didn't have > room for them. He has two step daughters 12 and 14. > He leaves them home alone when he works. This > didn't bother me until the girls (my daughters) came > home telling me that the two stepsisters were in a > fight while their dad and step mom was at work and > the one who is 14 ran the 12 year old's head through > a window. The 14 year old has been posting nude > pictures of herself on the internet. The ex hubby > did nothing and neither did the mom. Their idea of > punishment is to make her daughters live with their > dad for 2 weeks where he gives them a talking to and > makes them cry. The 14 year old sneaks out of the > house to be with boys. They actually caught her in > the car with an older boy (20) and she was having > oral sex with him. Last night my daughter was > chatting with the 12 year old. She was home alone > while the parents were bowling, and she went outside > while they were gone. He never has money to help > with our daughters (ex. my youngest needed paper > for school), I was completely broke and she asked > him for $1.00 to go to the dollar store and buy > paper. He said he didn't have the money. (They > were staying with him that weekend) She asked him > on Friday when he picked her up, on Saturday they > went and bought a new entertainment center, computer > desk, chair and other things. I don't want my > daughters to hate their dad. (Which my oldest says > she does). Based on these things (and there are > others) I just don't want my daughter to live with > them. > > Please don't get me wrong. I am not perfect and > there are things that I do. I do leave my daughters > home alone to go to the store. The store is less > then 3 tenths of a mile from my home. I do let my > daughters play on the computer, closely monitored > though. I do without so that they can have things > they want. I know that people will probably think I > am jealous, and maybe I am but I just don't want my > daughter living in a household like this. Not now. > She is only 12. > > I know that she is old enough to go to the judge and > tell him that she wants to live with her dad. I > wonder though, based on the things that are known, > if he would let her live with him. That scares me. > Anyone have any ideas, or has been through this. I > would love to hear from someone. IF you prefer to > email me personally, the email addy is > rnickell@... > > Thanks for listening and reading. > Love and prayers to all, > Moe > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system > (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.319 / Virus Database: 178 - Release > Date: 1/28/2002 > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2002 Report Share Posted April 11, 2002 Good advice ....I agree! Re: Moe Moe, IMHO, Follow your instincts. And TRY your hardest to start accumulating evidence on the things you've told us...in case she tells the judge she wants to live there. If you can prove it's not a good environment, it won't matter what your daughter wants. Keep a journal....write down dates times places, witnesses to all these things, the more you can prove and the more documentation you have, the better off you will be, and your daughter. And DO NOT feeling guilty about leaving your daughter home alone for short periods of time. 12 (again, depends on maturity level) in my opinion, is old enough to take care of themselves for short periods of time. Take care and follow your heart, you are a good person. --- moe wrote: > Hi everyone. > I haven't been posting to much but I need to ask > for your all's help and opinions on this. My middle > daughter is wanting to move in with her dad and his > wife. I don't want her too. Not because her dad > remarried. Here are my reasons, when I was > homeless, he wouldn't take the girls with him until > I could find us a place to live. He didn't have > room for them. He has two step daughters 12 and 14. > He leaves them home alone when he works. This > didn't bother me until the girls (my daughters) came > home telling me that the two stepsisters were in a > fight while their dad and step mom was at work and > the one who is 14 ran the 12 year old's head through > a window. The 14 year old has been posting nude > pictures of herself on the internet. The ex hubby > did nothing and neither did the mom. Their idea of > punishment is to make her daughters live with their > dad for 2 weeks where he gives them a talking to and > makes them cry. The 14 year old sneaks out of the > house to be with boys. They actually caught her in > the car with an older boy (20) and she was having > oral sex with him. Last night my daughter was > chatting with the 12 year old. She was home alone > while the parents were bowling, and she went outside > while they were gone. He never has money to help > with our daughters (ex. my youngest needed paper > for school), I was completely broke and she asked > him for $1.00 to go to the dollar store and buy > paper. He said he didn't have the money. (They > were staying with him that weekend) She asked him > on Friday when he picked her up, on Saturday they > went and bought a new entertainment center, computer > desk, chair and other things. I don't want my > daughters to hate their dad. (Which my oldest says > she does). Based on these things (and there are > others) I just don't want my daughter to live with > them. > > Please don't get me wrong. I am not perfect and > there are things that I do. I do leave my daughters > home alone to go to the store. The store is less > then 3 tenths of a mile from my home. I do let my > daughters play on the computer, closely monitored > though. I do without so that they can have things > they want. I know that people will probably think I > am jealous, and maybe I am but I just don't want my > daughter living in a household like this. Not now. > She is only 12. > > I know that she is old enough to go to the judge and > tell him that she wants to live with her dad. I > wonder though, based on the things that are known, > if he would let her live with him. That scares me. > Anyone have any ideas, or has been through this. I > would love to hear from someone. IF you prefer to > email me personally, the email addy is > rnickell@... > > Thanks for listening and reading. > Love and prayers to all, > Moe > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system > ( http://www.grisoft.com). <http://www.grisoft.com).> > Version: 6.0.319 / Virus Database: 178 - Release > Date: 1/28/2002 > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2002 Report Share Posted April 11, 2002 Moe~ Sorry to hear you are going through such a difficult time of decisions, so many feelings involved too. I can only tell you that I experienced first hand, the back and fourth routine. It can be so unsettling for a child to have so many changes. Especially with all of the hormones raging war! I have thought about moving my daughter to her grandmother's, but it would only make things more confusing and unstable. You sound like such a sweet Mom, I can't imagine you wouldn't be the best gardian for her! Just tell her NO and she will get over it. You know, the WHAAAAAA cry cry in her room? That's the one. I say you are the mom and you know what is best for your child. SO THERE on her and her Dad if you don't want her to go! I just don't think that is selfish. Boy, am I opinionated on this one. :0) Different situations may call for a child to move to the other parent, but if she is doing well with you, stick to your guns and show her loyalty. That ought to soften her up. AFTER the Booooooo Hooooooooos. Kids that age are not always happy! LOL Who knows, maybe I know nothing, but look how I grew up! HEHEHEHE. Roots...Sista! LOL Love you, Ingrid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2002 Report Share Posted April 12, 2002 Ummm....why would he insist she get her braces off? That's kinda wierd... I know court is hard even when you know you're in the right. I will say some prayers for you my friend. __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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