Re: Hello All and Thank You

February 18, 2004

Dear :

Welcome to the group. I must say your handle " Lewydaughter " broke my heart.

So many of us have become that. I has been a little over 6 months for me.

My dad was diagnosed very late and died 5 weeks after his diagnosis. I never

saw myself through the light you shed, but I felt so described by your

Lweydaughter handle.

I am sorry your mom feels so bad about being in the nh. It must be lonely

for her. Jus try to be as possitive and give her as much joy as you can when

you are there. Don't let her mood strain the relationship between the two of

you. She needs all the positive feeling she can have and the best ones will

come from you. When your visits become happy times to cherish, they will be

more

fullfilling for her and she will not be missing you so much. She will have

those feelings, even if she doesn't remember seeing you from one visit to the

other. Have you thought that she cannot keep track of time and once a week may

be an incredible long time for her to see you? I don't know what to do

about that, but some of it may be the way she perceives it.

I have two teenage daughters, 18 and 16. The oldest one went away to college

for the first time 9 days after my dad died. I took her to Chicago to settle

her there. By the time I got back to Miami, I had no idea what had hit me.

It took a long time and many postings here to work it all out. As you see I

am still posting. It is a great feeling to be able to give and receive support

in this non-judgemental environment. I am glad you joined our group. You

have all our support, my prayers and hugs,

Josie

February 18, 2004

Hi, ,

Welcome to our group! You will find some great people here! Thanks for

telling us about your mom. It sounds like you have your hands full. I had to

laugh when you told about your mom worrying about " the prostitute wearing her

clothes " in the picture with your dad. Sometimes they come out with the

funniest

things. It always seems like when I am at the end of my rope with my dad, he

comes up with something that just makes me laugh because it is so crazy. I

bring my dad to work with me in the mornings. Today he wanted to know why all

the naked people were running around the office! He definitely has a better

time at the office than I do! Glad you found us!

Hugs,

Piper

February 18, 2004

Welcome to the group lewydaughter. Hang on to the laughter..sometimes its

the only thing that helps up to get through the day.

Courage

Hello All and Thank You

>It's comforting to find " kindred spirits " . A bit about my

>story: My Mom is 80, was diagnosed with LBD in July 2003. My father

>died 5 mos. prior, so many of Mom's early symptoms (memory lapses,

>delusions, hallucinations)were attributed to exhaustion and grief,

>after caring for Dad at home for 3 years. She now lives in a

>seniors' residence, but wants to return home. Physically, she's

>still relatively strong, has some problems with balance, digestion.

>The confusion, delusions, hallucinations persist. She signed a power

>of attorney for personal care and financial matters some time ago,

>now wishes to revoke that and " try living on her own " . A recent trip

>to her family dr. has hopefully convinced her that she's in the best

>possible place, but she's angry with me, thinks I've " shunned " her.

>I'm the only child, a divorced mom of 4 young adults who are just

>beginning to leave the nest. Mom lives 1/2 hr. away. I visit weekly

> & we talk on the phone daily, but it doesn't seem to be enough for

>her. The guilt is overwhelming; visits are strained. When we're

>together alone, she is bitter and critical of my efforts, yet in

>the company of her dr., or the residence staff, she acts as

>though all is well. Mom is taking Aricept and Celexa which seem to

>be " holding the fort " . She thinks her greatest problems are

>cataracts, glaucoma and the " prostitute wearing her clothes " in the

>photograph of my father and her! Laughter is the only thing keeping

>me (nearly)sane through this; fortunately Mom laughs too, sometime!

>Again, I thank you for being here/out there. Blessings to all.

>

>Welcome to LBDcaregivers.

>

February 22, 2004

Hi Lewydaughter

Sorry to hear about your mother. Anger is part of it. You have to be a duck

and let it just roll off your back like rain water. It isnt easy. Since you

are an only child having your mother in an assisted living is probably the

best place. I have two sisters who helped with my mother and now we take

care of my dad. I have 3 other siblings and they live out of state. Do all

that you can and dont feel bad about what you cannot control.

M

>

>Reply-To: LBDcaregivers

>To: LBDcaregivers

>Subject: Hello All and Thank You

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