Mothers

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In a message dated 4/10/2003 12:40:14 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

lshuman@... writes:

> i have had a negative thought when my " other " daughter cancels her dr's

> app'ts- and for me (when UNinvestigatged) it means that i love her and want

> her to take care of herself and

> and want her to feel well because i hear that's what she wants....sweet

> intentions maybe uninvestigated and perhaps miscommunicated....

I'm really hearing this tonight. Thank you for pointing out this perspective,

Laurie. It seems like everything my mom has ever done for me/to me/with

me...has been because she loved me.

I have really been postponing doing the Work on my mom. She's been like this

sacred story to me...and earlier tonight I was thinking about how did

the Work on her mom for three years. I started thinking how I could possibly

undo every single story I have about the world/life by judging one person!

The thoughts about one person totally run into thoughts about other things --

sort of like that adult/child post I just wrote. And lately, I'm really

feeling a pull to go back and undo some more childhood stories..however silly

they sound. I bet I could find an adult one that's exactly the same!

And then I was thinking about the amends. It seems like I'm better able to

make amends after doing the Work on a specific person/thought. If I do the

Work on: I shouldn't lie...Ibroad) and then make the amends to apologize to

every single person I've lied to, that would be a huge list! So I do my

amends as I do the Work on them...like Gio shouldn't lie to me...and I start

small. I also do living amends...which might look like not lying to

strangers.

I think I'd like to start looking at Work about my mom finally. I'm ready to

see who she really is...and I'm ready to meet her for the first time..and to

introduce her to who I really am without all my stories about her. Sounds

exciting to me! I get to make two new friends! My mom...and me. : )

Love,

*m