New to group-need advice please

[Guest guest]

,

I would take him now and not wait.  We always called them " talking doctors "

just people to help and make our thoughts better just like doctor make our

bodies better.  Find an ocd specialist that can really help him now while he is

young. 

Just my opinion.

in WA

Subject: New to group-need advice please

To:

Date: Sunday, March 28, 2010, 4:49 PM

 

Hello,

I am new to the group and am looking for any advice/support I can get. I have a

son who just turned 5. I noticed from an early age (around 3) that he was a

very deep thinker and a worrier. The deepness to the religious questions he

asks me are amazing. My son has a lot of classic symptoms of OCD. He is

tortured by intrusive thoughts. He went through a period of a month or so where

he was so afraid he was accidently going to hurt someone else. He would

constantly ask me... " I think I just hit my brother, " but the thing is, I was

watching him and he did no such thing. I had a very non-scary conversation

about privates, and after that he was so worried that he was going to accidently

touch someone else's privates. He would constantly say, " I think I just touched

____ privates on accident, " even though he didn't. I can tell by the look on

his face when he is having intrusive thoughts and he is very disturbed by them.

The other night he was bawling

saying, " I don't want to think this way, get the thoughts out of my mind. " His

new thing this past week is he is afraid he is going to pee in his pants. At

preschool the teacher said he went to the bathroom 4 times over a three hour

period. I actually took him to the doc just to make sure he didn't have a UTI

and he didn't.

Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

At this point I have chosen to monitor his symptoms and if the bad days start

out weighing the good ones, then I will take him to be seen by a specialist. I

am afraid if I have him seen, it will make him worry worse and really think he

has a problem. Any suggestions? I know what my son is going through as I

suffered the same way as a child/adolescent. It breaks my heart. Thank you,

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

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[Guest guest]

,

You may want to learn about PANDAS in addition to OCD. The urinary urges are

common to PANDAS as are the flare ups you mention. OCD waxes and wanes. PANDAS

starts or flares abruptly, with periods of normal behavior in between.

The OCD thoughts (such as intrusive thoughts or scrupulosity) are the same for

both disorders, but the treatments are different.

PANDAS is triggered by a strep infection. But that doesn't mean it has to be

strep throat. Younger kids frequently get ear infections or sinus infections

which can also be caused by the same bacteria, but you can't culture the ear

canal or sinuses easily. So they don't get diagnosed with " strep " per se. One of

the treatments for PANDAS is antibiotics.

Places you can go to to learn more are:

www.pandasresourcesnetwork.org

www.webpediatrics.org

www.pandasnetwork.org

ERP can also be very helpful for both traditional OCD and PANDAS and I would

highly recommend the workbook " What to Do When Your Brain Gets Stuck "

There are several moms on this forum whose kids have PANDAS, so if you have

questions, please feel free to ask. We've all been in your shoes.

His new thing this past week is he is afraid he is going to pee in his pants.

At preschool the teacher said he went to the bathroom 4 times over a three hour

period. I actually took him to the doc just to make sure he didn't have a UTI

and he didn't.

>

>

>

> Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome to the group!

I am so sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through.

My daughter is now 9. When she was 2 we started noticing " odd " behaviors

including violent head thumping and excessive rocking. There were many others

red flags as well, but too much to go in to right now. Behaviors changed over

the years but it always seemed as though there was something strange going on

with her. We worked with a local childrens clinc, her doctor and once she

started school we worked with them on an IEP for her. EVERYONE said there were

red flags but no one could tell us what was going on. Toward the end of first

grade my daughter informed me that she had been touching other kids at school in

thier " privates " . I know the sheer fear of not knowing what is going on. I

bawled my eyes out all the way to the school. I felt it was my duty to let them

know, so they could handle it in the best possible way, as far as notifying the

other parents. All I could think is that if she is doing that, someone had done

something to her. It was a horrible experience. As it turned out, she was only

" worried " about touching other kids, like when she helped her best friend up on

the monkey bars. What a relief! I too had had a light-hearted talk with her

about good/bad touching at the same time as discussing not going with strangers,

fire safety etc.... Her little mind latched on to this one topic and to this day

she still struggles with the worry that she is going to accidently touch someone

there. It is heart breaking.

She has also climbed in to my lap, bawling, and asked me what was wrong with

her. She has told me that her brain feels like it is tied up in knots. As a

parent, though it is frustrating and annoying to have to deal with it, it is

more agonizing to watch your baby suffering. I know how you feel because she has

been at that exact stage. It has now progressed and manifested in other ways as

well. She avoids going to the bathroom to the last second, often times being too

late, because she doesn't want to wash her hands. It is obsessive when she does

it. She has scrubbed behind her ears wtill they have cracked and bled. She

worries about lying so she insert " I think " in to just about everything she

says. I could go on and on.

I have to agree that getting help from someone now would probably be a good

idea. It may be very difficult to find someone that will help though. My

daughter has yet to be diagnosed with anything. We finally have a parental

consultation with a psychologist coming up on the 6th and we are hoping it

actually gets us somewhere. We did hear an awful lot of BS from an awful lot of

people up to this point. Everything from, she is demon posessed because we

weren't going to church at the time, to she'll outgrow it, to it's due to

approaching puberty. If I may, my best advice to you is, take what is useful and

throw the garbage out. You know your child better than anyone. No one else is

there watching and dealing with it day in and day out. Go with your instincts

and keep fighting for your baby! It's a tough fight, but you are not alone! I'm

glad you found us, and you are welcome to vent on here any time!

Take care and keep us posted.

Heidi -WA

New to group-need advice please

Hello,

I am new to the group and am looking for any advice/support I can get. I have a

son who just turned 5. I noticed from an early age (around 3) that he was a very

deep thinker and a worrier. The deepness to the religious questions he asks me

are amazing. My son has a lot of classic symptoms of OCD. He is tortured by

intrusive thoughts. He went through a period of a month or so where he was so

afraid he was accidently going to hurt someone else. He would constantly ask

me... " I think I just hit my brother, " but the thing is, I was watching him and

he did no such thing. I had a very non-scary conversation about privates, and

after that he was so worried that he was going to accidently touch someone

else's privates. He would constantly say, " I think I just touched ____ privates

on accident, " even though he didn't. I can tell by the look on his face when he

is having intrusive thoughts and he is very disturbed by them. The other night

he was bawling sa ying, " I don't want to think this way, get the thoughts out of

my mind. " His new thing this past week is he is afraid he is going to pee in his

pants. At preschool the teacher said he went to the bathroom 4 times over a

three hour period. I actually took him to the doc just to make sure he didn't

have a UTI and he didn't.

Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

At this point I have chosen to monitor his symptoms and if the bad days start

out weighing the good ones, then I will take him to be seen by a specialist. I

am afraid if I have him seen, it will make him worry worse and really think he

has a problem. Any suggestions? I know what my son is going through as I

suffered the same way as a child/adolescent. It breaks my heart. Thank you,

__________________________________________________________

Hotmail: Trusted email with powerful SPAM protection.

http://clk.atdmt.com/GBL/go/210850553/direct/01/

[Guest guest]

Welcome, .

Yes, to the flare ups. OCD waxes and wanes. Sometimes it is predictable, like

with illness, stress, not enough sleep, change in routine, etc. Other times, it

just waxes because that is what OCD does.

Doing the correct therapy, CBT/ERP (cognitive behavioral therapy / exposure and

response prevention), is better to do sooner, rather than later. As they

mature, the OCD can become more ingrained, which can make it harder to fight

later. Although, it can be difficult to find a therapist, who truly knows how

to treat OCD correctly, that takes young children too. But, using CBT/ERP, the

brain can be retrained and be more effective than medication.

I'm so sorry he was crying about it recently. We've been there too with our son

(now 18). It's so hard on them, and as a parent, you feel helpless to make it

better.

You mentioned you suffered the same way as a child. Do you also have OCD?

Glad you found our group, .

BJ

>

>

> Hello,

>

>

>

> I am new to the group and am looking for any advice/support I can get. I have

a son who just turned 5. I noticed from an early age (around 3) that he was a

very deep thinker and a worrier. The deepness to the religious questions he

asks me are amazing. My son has a lot of classic symptoms of OCD. He is

tortured by intrusive thoughts. He went through a period of a month or so where

he was so afraid he was accidently going to hurt someone else. He would

constantly ask me... " I think I just hit my brother, " but the thing is, I was

watching him and he did no such thing. I had a very non-scary conversation

about privates, and after that he was so worried that he was going to accidently

touch someone else's privates. He would constantly say, " I think I just touched

____ privates on accident, " even though he didn't. I can tell by the look on

his face when he is having intrusive thoughts and he is very disturbed by them.

The other night he was bawling saying, " I don't want to think this way, get the

thoughts out of my mind. " His new thing this past week is he is afraid he is

going to pee in his pants. At preschool the teacher said he went to the

bathroom 4 times over a three hour period. I actually took him to the doc just

to make sure he didn't have a UTI and he didn't.

>

>

>

> Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

>

>

>

> At this point I have chosen to monitor his symptoms and if the bad days start

out weighing the good ones, then I will take him to be seen by a specialist. I

am afraid if I have him seen, it will make him worry worse and really think he

has a problem. Any suggestions? I know what my son is going through as I

suffered the same way as a child/adolescent. It breaks my heart. Thank you,

>

> _________________________________________________________________

> Hotmail: Trusted email with powerful SPAM protection.

> http://clk.atdmt.com/GBL/go/210850553/direct/01/

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I just wanted to say, " Welcome " , and I'm sorry you have to be a part of this

group.I hate this ocd, especially when it hits such young children.My son was

diagnosed at age 4.He is now 8.He too, had many of the same symptoms your son

has, afraid he had peed his pants, thinking he may have done something with his

privates,afraid of stabbing me or someone , or hurting someone.constant bad

thoughts, etc,

It does wax and wane, so you will experience good times and bad times.My advice

is for you not to wait, and get him started in therapy.

My daughter who is 13 was diagnosed with ocd at age 5, and I can give you some

hope, because she is much better now. Many years of meds( some were the wrong

ones, and many years of therapy, and hospitalizations) she's not great, but she

is better! 

Hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

Hello BJ, and everyone who has taken the time to respond,

I am so glad I have found this group. Your e-mails have brought me to tears

just because it makes me feel better that I am not alone. Bj, you asked me if I

have OCD and yes I do. I am 31 years old and have suffered with it for as long

as I can remember. I think that is why it makes me so heartbroken, because I

know what it is like to live that way. Just like my son, I had the intrusive

thoughts of OCD. I have never been treated for the OCD but because at my age

now, I am so much better. Because I was not doing any outward rituals or

compuslions, I suffered silently. Even in kindergarten I remember not wanting

to go to class because I was afraid I was going to throw up in front of

everyone. The intrusive thoughts tortured me. As I approaced middle school and

high school; panic attacks were a normal part of my life. Although I suffered

many years growing up, there is hope. I am a succesful and happy person, and as

I have mentioned earlier I have learned to control my own symptoms and thoughts.

I guess in a way it makes me feel a little guilty because of all of the things

my son could inherit from me...why did it have to be this?

To:

From: BJClosner@...

Date: Mon, 29 Mar 2010 05:48:31 +0000

Subject: Re: New to group-need advice please

Welcome, .

Yes, to the flare ups. OCD waxes and wanes. Sometimes it is predictable, like

with illness, stress, not enough sleep, change in routine, etc. Other times, it

just waxes because that is what OCD does.

Doing the correct therapy, CBT/ERP (cognitive behavioral therapy / exposure and

response prevention), is better to do sooner, rather than later. As they mature,

the OCD can become more ingrained, which can make it harder to fight later.

Although, it can be difficult to find a therapist, who truly knows how to treat

OCD correctly, that takes young children too. But, using CBT/ERP, the brain can

be retrained and be more effective than medication.

I'm so sorry he was crying about it recently. We've been there too with our son

(now 18). It's so hard on them, and as a parent, you feel helpless to make it

better.

You mentioned you suffered the same way as a child. Do you also have OCD?

Glad you found our group, .

BJ

>

>

> Hello,

>

>

>

> I am new to the group and am looking for any advice/support I can get. I have

a son who just turned 5. I noticed from an early age (around 3) that he was a

very deep thinker and a worrier. The deepness to the religious questions he asks

me are amazing. My son has a lot of classic symptoms of OCD. He is tortured by

intrusive thoughts. He went through a period of a month or so where he was so

afraid he was accidently going to hurt someone else. He would constantly ask

me... " I think I just hit my brother, " but the thing is, I was watching him and

he did no such thing. I had a very non-scary conversation about privates, and

after that he was so worried that he was going to accidently touch someone

else's privates. He would constantly say, " I think I just touched ____ privates

on accident, " even though he didn't. I can tell by the look on his face when he

is having intrusive thoughts and he is very disturbed by them. The other night

he was bawling saying, " I don't want to think this way, get the thoughts out of

my mind. " His new thing this past week is he is afraid he is going to pee in his

pants. At preschool the teacher said he went to the bathroom 4 times over a

three hour period. I actually took him to the doc just to make sure he didn't

have a UTI and he didn't.

>

>

>

> Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

>

>

>

> At this point I have chosen to monitor his symptoms and if the bad days start

out weighing the good ones, then I will take him to be seen by a specialist. I

am afraid if I have him seen, it will make him worry worse and really think he

has a problem. Any suggestions? I know what my son is going through as I

suffered the same way as a child/adolescent. It breaks my heart. Thank you,

>

> __________________________________________________________

> Hotmail: Trusted email with powerful SPAM protection.

> http://clk.atdmt.com/GBL/go/210850553/direct/01/

>

>

[Guest guest]

HI - I was reading your post and felt like I was reading what I would have

written a few years ago had I known this group existed.  From my experience the

" flare ups " seems to be a normal part of the OCD process.  My son experienced

very similar things as you have described.  He had the " pee feeling " for quite

some time and would go to the bathroom numerous times, almost to the point of

being disruptive.  We did the doctor thing to check for UTI, which was

negative.  My son also had the reporting things where he would say the things he

was worried he was going to do even though he never did them.  When this first

happened it was so disruptive that we could not even have a conversation or do

anything without this interfering.  I think it is good for you to monitor your

child, however, I would also make calls to begin treatment as soon as you can as

sometimes there are waiting lists.  I was lucky and found someone who could see

us the day

after I called, but she is not covered by insurance and those therapists tend

to have more of a waiting list.  I know there is that worry that you will make

your child's worries intensifies, but you may also validate their concerns by

seeking treatment.  We started treatment for my son at age 5 and it was the best

thing we would have done.  He was very advanced emotionally for his age, always

contemplating the ways of the world and God since he was 3, so this certainly

helped the process.  Hope this helps!

 

(8 year old son with OCD)

Connecticut

 

[Guest guest]

(((()))) I know that feeling. . The dread of it being a life long

disorder. And yes, he could have inherited from you, since it is genetic. .

But, 1 in 100 have OCD, and many don't inherit it too. It can be managed with

the right therapy, and possibly meds, if the anxiety is too high, so that's

good. There is also the possibility that his OCD might not be as severe as

yours was when you were a child. I'm glad to hear you are better as an adult,

but sorry to hear you suffered so much. We've had many adults in this group

that share the OCD diagnosis with their children. Every time I have a parent

share that they are better as an adult, it gives me hope for our son.

Glad you found us, .

BJ

> >

> >

> > Hello,

> >

> >

> >

> > I am new to the group and am looking for any advice/support I can get. I

have a son who just turned 5. I noticed from an early age (around 3) that he was

a very deep thinker and a worrier. The deepness to the religious questions he

asks me are amazing. My son has a lot of classic symptoms of OCD. He is tortured

by intrusive thoughts. He went through a period of a month or so where he was so

afraid he was accidently going to hurt someone else. He would constantly ask

me... " I think I just hit my brother, " but the thing is, I was watching him and

he did no such thing. I had a very non-scary conversation about privates, and

after that he was so worried that he was going to accidently touch someone

else's privates. He would constantly say, " I think I just touched ____ privates

on accident, " even though he didn't. I can tell by the look on his face when he

is having intrusive thoughts and he is very disturbed by them. The other night

he was bawling saying, " I don't want to think this way, get the thoughts out of

my mind. " His new thing this past week is he is afraid he is going to pee in his

pants. At preschool the teacher said he went to the bathroom 4 times over a

three hour period. I actually took him to the doc just to make sure he didn't

have a UTI and he didn't.

> >

> >

> >

> > Do your children experience " flare ups? " He can go for weeks and act ok, and

then will have a period of several days when he is really bothered by the

symptoms.

> >

> >

> >

> > At this point I have chosen to monitor his symptoms and if the bad days

start out weighing the good ones, then I will take him to be seen by a

specialist. I am afraid if I have him seen, it will make him worry worse and

really think he has a problem. Any suggestions? I know what my son is going

through as I suffered the same way as a child/adolescent. It breaks my heart.

Thank you,

> >

> > __________________________________________________________

> > Hotmail: Trusted email with powerful SPAM protection.

> > http://clk.atdmt.com/GBL/go/210850553/direct/01/

> >

> >