Re: Intimacy and Asperger Syndrome ÃÂ Can They Coexist?

[Guest guest]

Hi grobertson;Good points, not every one can jump out with a response verbally opr physically. As a child I was not able to, only learned how as a leen and adult. Somertimes I over react to something that was met inncoently.renaissanzelady "No one can abuse you unless you give them permission to

do so,

and one's silence is the same as granting permission."

gprobertson responded: " ... <snip> ... I think that the statement

above gives

bullies permission to do whatever they like because their victims are

to blame

.... <snip> ... "

It's unfortunate that you think that because the statement I made is

accurate

and correct.

Children are taught from an early age how to deal with situations that

are

unpleasant to them. They are taught to 'get away' from the situation.

As early as 3 years of age, in daycare and pre-school and kindergarten

settings,

the message that is repeated is that when someone is doing something

that upsets

you, WALK AWAY.

If that person follows you, TELL A GROWN UP.

If that person does nothing, KEEP TELLING GROWN UPS UNTIL SOMEONE

LISTENS.

The discussion in this thread, however, was about adults who are even

more able

than children to WALK AWAY from abusive individuals ... in real life,

online and

anywhere else the individual may feel victimized or abused.

No one need remain in an abusive situation unless they choose to remain

in said

abusive situation.

If an adult finds hi

mself or herself in a bad situation, AS or not,

they have

choices. If the individual CHOOSES to remain in the bad situation,

that

individual is giving silent permission for the abuse to continue.

In other words, gprobertson, no one can abuse you unless you give them

permission to do so, and one's silence is the same as granting

permission.

Raven

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[Guest guest]

" Thank you also for this insight. Those who don't have a life or death struggle

can tend to set high standards for others, without knowing the other person's

situation. "

Yours truly went through a suicidal phase and nearly succeeded. There are two

people close to me who are going through life or death struggles right now. Yet

I keep my own standards high because I realize that society is not going to cut

me any slack.

Even treading water is not enough. You have to swin for shore.

That is life.

Administrator