Re: Another question

[Guest guest]

Hello,

My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby gate

to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room.  She is big to step

over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out quick. 

When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does not have

to shut herself in.  The only bad thing is that he has learned he can stand at

the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her (which drives

her crazy and he knows it)  we have moved the gate down the hallway a little so

that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his room or the

bathroom. 

Crystal Rice

mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

________________________________

To:

Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

Subject: Another question

 

How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made the

point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms. Not

exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put them

on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he has to

learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage or

basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

Ideas??

Thanks!!

[Guest guest]

The think about door nob things is that one must have the specific MOTOR

STRENGTH to open them (squeeze and turn). HArd for our kids unless we work

to build palmer muscles and TEACH them. But a hook and eye will lock the

door. You know tyou are not locking your kids in their rooms. It is your

house. Do what you need to do to have family safety and peace of mind.

>

>

> How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

>

> We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made

> the point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their

> rooms. Not exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle

> when they're inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're

> not. They do a lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing

> with it (and LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them).

> Plus tends to trash our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on

> in the hall bath, which is hard to hear when I'm at the kitchen table

> working with on his homework.

>

> What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put

> them on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation

> he has to learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the

> garage or basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really

> want.

>

> Ideas??

>

> Thanks!!

>

>

>

>

>

--

Sara- different pathways lead to Nirvana.

[Guest guest]

is a fabulous climber (he can get over our 4' wooden fence gate in the

yard with no problem) ...baby gates are not safe with him.

We were considering a Dutch door but is certainly able to figure out how

to push something to the door then climb over. Since two of the bedrooms in

question are near the steps or overlooking a 2-story foyer, we don't want to

encourage climbing near the doors...

Sent from my iPhone

Hello,

My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby gate

to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room. She is big to step

over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out quick.

When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does not have

to shut herself in. The only bad thing is that he has learned he can stand at

the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her (which drives

her crazy and he knows it) we have moved the gate down the hallway a little so

that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his room or the

bathroom.

Crystal Rice

mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

________________________________

To:

Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

Subject: Another question

How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made the

point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms. Not

exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put them

on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he has to

learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage or

basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

Ideas??

Thanks!!

[Guest guest]

, I bought travel alarms and put on all the doors so if opens a door it

goes off.They have alarms that stick with 2 sided tape or ones that have on the

door and you put the alarm piece between the door and door frame at Walgreens

and JCPennys had these. Nothing to install. does have a half door/dutch

door or daycare door with the lock on the outside but he does not have anything

in his room that he can push to the door to stand on and climb over. I had to to

this because we live in a story house with an open cat walk. You could put a

door that has the top and the bottom and lock the top and night. Make sure it

has a smaller door he can open from the inside if he needs you but one he cannot

get out. Like a pet door sorta. Some people have used full screen doors on kids

bedrooms. Talking about the kids rooms to keep him out put a latch lock on the

top of the door. Like what you are talking about the slide lock. For the fence

what about a taller gate? Cyndi B

>

> Hello,

> My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby

gate to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room. She is big to

step over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out

quick. When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does

not have to shut herself in. The only bad thing is that he has learned he can

stand at the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her

(which drives her crazy and he knows it) we have moved the gate down the

hallway a little so that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his

room or the bathroom.

>

> Crystal Rice

> mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

> Subject: Another question

>

>

> How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

>

> We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made the

point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms. Not

exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

>

> What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put them

on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he has to

learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage or

basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

>

> Ideas??

>

> Thanks!!

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Our town has freakish laws about fence heights. Anything in front of the back

of the house can be no taller than 4'. Since our house is on a wedge-shaped lot

(think slice of pie), only a very small portion of our yard is " behind the back

of the house " . So the parts of our fence that are next to our house are (have

to be) 4' tall. We might be able to get a variance, but we can't afford the 6'

fence anyway (there's a lot of 4' fence). Besides which, he's already pushed

the Cozy Coupe to the 6' part...with it's really just a matter of time.

How tall is the divider part on a Dutch door? Is it halfway up or closer to the

top? If he can reach the top edge, I'm pretty sure he could get over without

having to push anything to it. He grabs the railing by our overlook and walks

his feet up. Sometimes I think that having two active brothers (who both have

ADHD) gives him way more ideas than I really want him to have!!

He's been able to climb out of a crib since he was 2.5....once he could reach

the top there was no keeping him in (until we got a crib tent). It's hard to

believe how strong he is, but then climbing is something he does in short

bursts. I don't think he'd be able to sustain it very long. His stamina is

nowhere near his brothers'.

Sent from myiPhone

On Dec 31, 2009, at 8:32 PM, " cynthiamiltonburns "

wrote:

, I bought travel alarms and put on all the doors so if opens a door it

goes off.They have alarms that stick with 2 sided tape or ones that have on the

door and you put the alarm piece between the door and door frame at Walgreens

and JCPennys had these. Nothing to install. does have a half door/dutch

door or daycare door with the lock on the outside but he does not have anything

in his room that he can push to the door to stand on and climb over. I had to to

this because we live in a story house with an open cat walk. You could put a

door that has the top and the bottom and lock the top and night. Make sure it

has a smaller door he can open from the inside if he needs you but one he cannot

get out. Like a pet door sorta. Some people have used full screen doors on kids

bedrooms. Talking about the kids rooms to keep him out put a latch lock on the

top of the door. Like what you are talking about the slide lock. For the fence

what about a

taller gate? Cyndi B

>

> Hello,

> My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby

gate to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room. She is big to

step over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out

quick. When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does

not have to shut herself in. The only bad thing is that he has learned he can

stand at the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her

(which drives her crazy and he knows it) we have moved the gate down the hallway

a little so that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his room or

the bathroom.

>

> Crystal Rice

> mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

> Subject: Another question

>

>

> How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

>

> We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made the

point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms. Not

exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

>

> What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put them

on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he has to

learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage or

basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

>

> Ideas??

>

> Thanks!!

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

You know those playhouses? saw his brothers up on top of ours, and

didn't rest til he figured out how to get up there, too. It's really no mean

feat, since he's so much smaller and less agile than they are!

Of course, he had to be taught how to get DOWN, lol. I got tired of having to

rescue him constantly. He is our little force of nature!!

Sent from my iPhone

Our town has freakish laws about fence heights. Anything in front of the back of

the house can be no taller than 4'. Since our house is on a wedge-shaped lot

(think slice of pie), only a very small portion of our yard is " behind the back

of the house " . So the parts of our fence that are next to our house are (have to

be) 4' tall. We might be able to get a variance, but we can't afford the 6'

fence anyway (there's a lot of 4' fence). Besides which, he's already pushed the

Cozy Coupe to the 6' part...with it's really just a matter of time.

How tall is the divider part on a Dutch door? Is it halfway up or closer to the

top? If he can reach the top edge, I'm pretty sure he could get over without

having to push anything to it. He grabs the railing by our overlook and walks

his feet up. Sometimes I think that having two active brothers (who both have

ADHD) gives him way more ideas than I really want him to have!!

He's been able to climb out of a crib since he was 2.5....once he could reach

the top there was no keeping him in (until we got a crib tent). It's hard to

believe how strong he is, but then climbing is something he does in short

bursts. I don't think he'd be able to sustain it very long. His stamina is

nowhere near his brothers'.

Sent from myiPhone

On Dec 31, 2009, at 8:32 PM, " cynthiamiltonburns "

wrote:

, I bought travel alarms and put on all the doors so if opens a door it

goes off.They have alarms that stick with 2 sided tape or ones that have on the

door and you put the alarm piece between the door and door frame at Walgreens

and JCPennys had these. Nothing to install. does have a half door/dutch

door or daycare door with the lock on the outside but he does not have anything

in his room that he can push to the door to stand on and climb over. I had to to

this because we live in a story house with an open cat walk. You could put a

door that has the top and the bottom and lock the top and night. Make sure it

has a smaller door he can open from the inside if he needs you but one he cannot

get out. Like a pet door sorta. Some people have used full screen doors on kids

bedrooms. Talking about the kids rooms to keep him out put a latch lock on the

top of the door. Like what you are talking about the slide lock. For the fence

what about a

taller gate? Cyndi B

>

> Hello,

> My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby

gate to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room. She is big to

step over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out

quick. When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does

not have to shut herself in. The only bad thing is that he has learned he can

stand at the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her

(which drives her crazy and he knows it) we have moved the gate down the hallway

a little so that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his room or

the bathroom.

>

> Crystal Rice

> mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

> Subject: Another question

>

>

> How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

>

> We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made the

point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms. Not

exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

>

> What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put them

on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he has to

learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage or

basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

>

> Ideas??

>

> Thanks!!

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

, I would see if there is any way the town could make an exception on fence

height. I live in an area with restrictions also but a family was able to get an

exception here because their child is a climber and a runner. There are a few

people on this list that have children that run have been able to get their

fence paid for. As far as the Dutch door my father in law a carpenter/builder

cut a regular door a little higher to make my sons door.If someone could cut the

door for you then you could pick the height. The door knob has a lock on the

outside of the door. The only time my son is in his room is for sleep at night

and mornings. My son likes to hang around with me downstairs and very seldom

wants to play in his room.Maybe you could put something on the top of the fence

that he could not climb. Did you know that Doug Flutie has partnered to help pay

for fences for families that have autistic kids.Read more about

this.Northeastern Fence and Supply helps autistic family

By Staff reports

Fri Dec 11, 2009, 11:00 AM EST

Saugus - The Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism is proud to announce it has

partnered with Northeastern Fence and Supply Corporation of Saugus to provide

the family of Lynn with a fence that will ensure the safety and

security of their autistic son as part of their " Flutie Family Fence Project. "

Northeastern Fence, a family-owned business located on Route 1 North with more

than 50 years in the industry, has generously donated the labor and fence to be

installed around the family's yard.

The issue of wandering is prevalent within the Autism community. According to a

recent online survey conducted by National Autism Association, 92 percent of the

respondents said their autistic child was prone to wandering.

" With any child, there is always a concern for safety when kids are playing

outside, " said Chirco, Director of Programming at the Flutie Foundation.

" That concern rises for parents of autistic children, who often wander and don't

understand the concept of danger or the repercussions of walking into traffic.

Installing a fence around the yard where children play is an important tool that

allows parents to create a safe area for their child to play freely. "

Chirco said the idea of complimentary fence installation, now known as the

Flutie Family Fence Project, came after repeated calls by parents, voicing their

concerns about the issue. He put out a call to action for fence companies

throughout the state, and Northeastern Fence stepped up to the plate.

" We love doing charitable work, and I know a bit about the needs of autistic

children because I have a family member who is on the spectrum, " said Mike

Payne, owner of Northeastern Fence and Supply. " Fences are good at keeping kids

in the yard, where they are out of harm's way. "

> >

> > Hello,

> > My daughter does not have a bedroom door right now so she puts up the baby

gate to keep her brother out when he is not allowed in the room. She is big to

step over it and he cant and it can be easily removed if she has to get out

quick. When we get the door on I'll probably keep the gate around so she does

not have to shut herself in. The only bad thing is that he has learned he can

stand at the gate and throw things over at her or just sit and stare at her

(which drives her crazy and he knows it) we have moved the gate down the hallway

a little so that he can not get to the doorway but it does not block his room or

the bathroom.

> >

> > Crystal Rice

> > mom to Austin 7 (DS) Savannah 10

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: macookson <macookson@>

> > To:

> > Sent: Thu, December 31, 2009 9:51:28 AM

> > Subject: Another question

> >

> >

> > How can we keep out of his siblings' bedrooms?

> >

> > We were thinking of getting a slide lock to put on the outside but DH made

the point that it makes it seem like we're locking our kids into their rooms.

Not exactly legal or safe! The kids use the lock on the door handle when they're

inside the room but need a way to keep out when they're not. They do a

lot of Lego and K'Nex building and don't want messing with it (and

LOVES popping Lego tires in his mouth to chew them). Plus tends to trash

our daughter's room. He also turns the shower on in the hall bath, which is hard

to hear when I'm at the kitchen table working with on his homework.

> >

> > What can we do? We have safety handles on our outside doors, we could put

them on the bedroom doors but DH and I are nervous that the more motivation he

has to learn how to use these, the quicker he'll be able to get into the garage

or basement or out the front door at will. Not something we really want.

> >

> > Ideas??

> >

> > Thanks!!

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Ok, is still very young, but you are making me wonder...like my other

three kids, LOVES the water. He would spend an hour in the shower if I

didn't make him get out!! Is this a thing with your kids, too?

Sent from my iPhone

Does anyone's child completely bath/shower selves?

In particular, how did you teach water temps & at what age did you start?

This is something I hope to " start " working on this summer but I honestly am

scared about the scalding potential.

DJ is bigger than me now & even if I wear a bathing suit & get in tub with him

it's a stand up, sit down, stand up process. So Dad (for the 1st time since we

got married) is now taking showers with DJ. Heh, now Dad knows what it's like...

I have also noticed that my DJ looooooooves to be taken care of just like the

other male units in my life. So, I am thinking I have to start this bath self

process asap to circumvent the whole helpless me attitude or DJ will be needing

someone to bath him forever.

It should prove drug worthy cause when I noticed his " helplessness " had extended

to bringing me a bottle of water to open or worse wanting me to go get the

water, I went on mommy drink fixing strike.

Ya'll, the first few times I did this, the boy literally just stood there &

stared at the bottle of water & unopened drink mix. I swear he was trying to out

wait me. When what seemed like decades had passed, he slowly moved his hand to

the bottle & PRETENDED he could not open it. If it had been a bottle of

rootbeer, it would have been opened & drank in a nano second.

So spring break has been about learning to ask but get own snack or drink. He

always has asked but we just always got it for him.

Only drawback so far is that I have to find a way to also impose a limit to the

amounts without undoing the independence thing.

Thanks for any pointers.

Kris

[Guest guest]

Hi Kris,

Zeb only takes lactaid if he wants to cheat and eat dairy but he does self

medicate. He knows that if he wants to eat a cheeseburger without a pill he

will spend the rest of the day on the bowl. He also bathes and showers

independently and has done so since he was 12. I marked the shower faucet with

tape to help him learn to regulate the water temp at first I put it on for

him. He does a bad job at drying his body but I am not going to do it. I have

sent him back into the bathroom to dry himself and put on dry clothes. He has

come out with the tee shirt back soaked same for the back of the underwear. He

loves taking a bath or a shower and monopolizes the bathroom for an hour and

longer. He does shampoo his hair but it is not his favorite. I do remind him and

sometimes can convince him to let me shampoo it in the sink. Prom day he let me

shampoo his hair, put in gel, hairspray etc. He hates his hair messed with. I

started teaching him around 10. I

stood outside the shower, stuck my head in or arms when necessary and did the

step to step sometimes in the tub if not shampooing his hair.  Mostly I got

soaked. I gradually backed myself out over a two year period so I could

get into focusing on privacy. My floor has been soaked so many times the

linoleum is coming up.

Charlyne

Subject: Another question

To:

Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 4:13 PM

 

Does anyone's child completely bath/shower selves?

In particular, how did you teach water temps & at what age did you start?

This is something I hope to " start " working on this summer but I honestly am

scared about the scalding potential.

DJ is bigger than me now & even if I wear a bathing suit & get in tub with him

it's a stand up, sit down, stand up process. So Dad (for the 1st time since we

got married) is now taking showers with DJ. Heh, now Dad knows what it's like...

I have also noticed that my DJ looooooooves to be taken care of just like the

other male units in my life. So, I am thinking I have to start this bath self

process asap to circumvent the whole helpless me attitude or DJ will be needing

someone to bath him forever.

It should prove drug worthy cause when I noticed his " helplessness " had extended

to bringing me a bottle of water to open or worse wanting me to go get the

water, I went on mommy drink fixing strike.

Ya'll, the first few times I did this, the boy literally just stood there &

stared at the bottle of water & unopened drink mix. I swear he was trying to out

wait me. When what seemed like decades had passed, he slowly moved his hand to

the bottle & PRETENDED he could not open it. If it had been a bottle of

rootbeer, it would have been opened & drank in a nano second.

So spring break has been about learning to ask but get own snack or drink. He

always has asked but we just always got it for him.

Only drawback so far is that I have to find a way to also impose a limit to the

amounts without undoing the independence thing.

Thanks for any pointers.

Kris

[Guest guest]

Isaac showers completely independently but after about 15 minutes I yell at

him to finish up or I am coming in to turn off the water. He also could

stay in there for an hour if I let him.

Tony does everything independently except the shampoo. After a few minutes

I go in the bathroom and ask him if he is ready and then he does the rest.

The tape on the wall letting him know where to put the arrow on the shower

knob is a good idea. Sometimes he gets it too cold or too hot. I never

thought to teach that part, just thought they would figure it out. However,

we do have our hot water heater set rather low.

Tony will spend a few minutes drying himself but he still prefers to air

dry. Isaac dries just fine unless he is afraid of missing something and

then he comes out kind of wet but then he is already trying to fix it.

When they were younger they would get the floor totally wet. A few times

Isaac filled up the tub and then (I must not have been paying enough

attention) he convinced Tony to also get naked and they would jump into the

bathtub as if it was a swimming pool. A few good jumps and the bathroom

would be covered with water and I would yell, " bath time is over. " Ahhh

..... the good old days.

Lori

>

>

> Ok, is still very young, but you are making me wonder...like my

> other three kids, LOVES the water. He would spend an hour in the

> shower if I didn't make him get out!! Is this a thing with your kids, too?

>

>

>

> Sent from my iPhone

>

> On Apr 13, 2010, at 4:13 PM, " kaprisock "

<kaprisock@...<kaprisock%40yahoo.com>>

> wrote:

>

> Does anyone's child completely bath/shower selves?

>

> In particular, how did you teach water temps & at what age did you start?

>

> This is something I hope to " start " working on this summer but I honestly

> am scared about the scalding potential.

>

> DJ is bigger than me now & even if I wear a bathing suit & get in tub with

> him it's a stand up, sit down, stand up process. So Dad (for the 1st time

> since we got married) is now taking showers with DJ. Heh, now Dad knows what

> it's like...

>

> I have also noticed that my DJ looooooooves to be taken care of just like

> the other male units in my life. So, I am thinking I have to start this bath

> self process asap to circumvent the whole helpless me attitude or DJ will be

> needing someone to bath him forever.

>

> It should prove drug worthy cause when I noticed his " helplessness " had

> extended to bringing me a bottle of water to open or worse wanting me to go

> get the water, I went on mommy drink fixing strike.

>

> Ya'll, the first few times I did this, the boy literally just stood there &

> stared at the bottle of water & unopened drink mix. I swear he was trying to

> out wait me. When what seemed like decades had passed, he slowly moved his

> hand to the bottle & PRETENDED he could not open it. If it had been a bottle

> of rootbeer, it would have been opened & drank in a nano second.

>

> So spring break has been about learning to ask but get own snack or drink.

> He always has asked but we just always got it for him.

>

> Only drawback so far is that I have to find a way to also impose a limit to

> the amounts without undoing the independence thing.

>

> Thanks for any pointers.

> Kris

>

>

[Guest guest]

We turned the temp on the water heater down to 120 degrees - non scald

temp. That was before we realized that Elie prefers what I call COLD water

but when I checked is actually about 90 degrees (swimming pool temp). When

Elie showered - about 5 or so years ago- we had him scrub with a nylon

scrungy by the numbers. We made a silly song up that had him going from his

head to his toes scrubbing. But then he developed a 'thing' about showers.

So now he soaks in bubble bath in a tub (still COLD water). He will NOT

scrub his head - or even wash it- so someone has to shampoo his head and he

is also shaved while in the tub since someone does that for him. HE has no

modesty - has no idea what that is, so we just ignore it as well. His

bedroom is on a hallway that has a door, so we make sure it is closed when

he is tubbing - this he is not exposed to the LR area or where other people

would be. Elie gets out of the tub - after an hour or so) and drapes a

towel around his neck - like macho guys do! Then he struts back to this

room and air dries for an hour or so before dressing. So he does not towel

himself - and I will tell you that I stopped drying him off when he was 10

and swung at me - evidently for him drying with a towel is another very

sensory thing.

I never got in the shower with him , nor has anyone else. Neither my

husband nor I leave our rooms unclothed, but Elie loves being naked. Even

now living with - there is a hall door to close so he isn't nude in

public, but he is frequently nude inhis own room and of course from

bathroom to bedroom.

>

>

> Hi Kris,

> Zeb only takes lactaid if he wants to cheat and eat dairy but he does self

> medicate. He knows that if he wants to eat a cheeseburger without a pill he

> will spend the rest of the day on the bowl. He also bathes and showers

> independently and has done so since he was 12. I marked the shower faucet

> with tape to help him learn to regulate the water temp at first I put it on

> for him. He does a bad job at drying his body but I am not going to do it. I

> have sent him back into the bathroom to dry himself and put on dry clothes.

> He has come out with the tee shirt back soaked same for the back of the

> underwear. He loves taking a bath or a shower and monopolizes the bathroom

> for an hour and longer. He does shampoo his hair but it is not his favorite.

> I do remind him and sometimes can convince him to let me shampoo it in the

> sink. Prom day he let me shampoo his hair, put in gel, hairspray etc. He

> hates his hair messed with. I started teaching him around 10. I

> stood outside the shower, stuck my head in or arms when necessary and did

> the step to step sometimes in the tub if not shampooing his hair. Mostly

> I got soaked. I gradually backed myself out over a two year period so I

> could get into focusing on privacy. My floor has been soaked so many times

> the linoleum is coming up.

> Charlyne

>

> From: kaprisock <kaprisock@... <kaprisock%40yahoo.com>>

> Subject: Another question

> To:

> Date: Tuesday, April 13, 2010, 4:13 PM

>

>

>

> Does anyone's child completely bath/shower selves?

>

> In particular, how did you teach water temps & at what age did you start?

>

> This is something I hope to " start " working on this summer but I honestly

> am scared about the scalding potential.

>

> DJ is bigger than me now & even if I wear a bathing suit & get in tub with

> him it's a stand up, sit down, stand up process. So Dad (for the 1st time

> since we got married) is now taking showers with DJ. Heh, now Dad knows what

> it's like...

>

> I have also noticed that my DJ looooooooves to be taken care of just like

> the other male units in my life. So, I am thinking I have to start this bath

> self process asap to circumvent the whole helpless me attitude or DJ will be

> needing someone to bath him forever.

>

> It should prove drug worthy cause when I noticed his " helplessness " had

> extended to bringing me a bottle of water to open or worse wanting me to go

> get the water, I went on mommy drink fixing strike.

>

> Ya'll, the first few times I did this, the boy literally just stood there &

> stared at the bottle of water & unopened drink mix. I swear he was trying to

> out wait me. When what seemed like decades had passed, he slowly moved his

> hand to the bottle & PRETENDED he could not open it. If it had been a bottle

> of rootbeer, it would have been opened & drank in a nano second.

>

> So spring break has been about learning to ask but get own snack or drink.

> He always has asked but we just always got it for him.

>

> Only drawback so far is that I have to find a way to also impose a limit to

> the amounts without undoing the independence thing.

>

> Thanks for any pointers.

> Kris

>

>