Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 I don't know if it is OCD, but sock thing is very common w/ OCD kids. My step-daughter had fits w/ socks from age 3 to about 6 or so. And she also would not play w/ her toys, and did not want anything moved or removed from her room, but had no problems leaving stuff around the house out of place....'other people's' stuff. She was only particular about her stuff. You stepson sound sounds very much like my daughter. But I couldn't say for sure if your stepson has OCD. Does he have a high level of anxiety about you touching his stuff...does the sock thing ever make you late getting out of the house? I guess I'm asking does teh OCD interfer w/ your life or is he just a little particular about his stuff? Amy PS - I'm a step mom too! Subject: Is this OCD To: Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 2:44 PM Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a gift he especially loved, or found an item/book/shirt he liked he would add it to his " special pile " which grew to about 5ft x 4ft in size. These items were sometime played with by him, but very rarely removed from his room. If he did wear a hoodie he loved he would talk about how he hoped that people who saw wouldn't remember it. His fathers house was a bit chaotic (messy) with not too much storage, so I ensured that his new room had lots of drawers and shelves. My step son moved his items over on his own terms, wanting to take all his special pile on one trip and he immediately tucked everything away into his new room. His room is very organized, everything in it's " right " spot and nothing on the floor, and he also refuses to take things out of his room and bring downstairs. I also find that things he particularly likes, he doesn't want to play with , and just tucks it away in a special spot. I find this very odd. These actions don't apply to the downstairs/communal areas of the house where he has no problem leaving his books all over or ripping apart the couch to build a fort. In addition to this, we also can't keep his fingers out of his mouth, this happens generally when he's reading, watching TV. Not only biting his nails but simply running his fingers across his teeth. There is also an issue with getting his socks on perfectly. Any insight would be helpful. thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Hi- I guess it doesn't really interfere with our life.., although his sock thing (partic. the seam along the toes) can hold us up a bit when we leave. He doesn't seem to mind us touching his stuff, but if i bring something out of his room to see if he'll play with it, he generally won't and then asks me to return it to it's spot and he'd rather play with it there. Some toys are allowed downstairs, but generally they stay there and don't make the trip upstairs. If he grabs a book from downstairs for a bedtime story, he'll ask us to return it back downstairs when we're done. He does sound like your daughter. Subject: Re: Is this OCD To: Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 11:53 AM I don't know if it is OCD, but sock thing is very common w/ OCD kids. My step-daughter had fits w/ socks from age 3 to about 6 or so. And she also would not play w/ her toys, and did not want anything moved or removed from her room, but had no problems leaving stuff around the house out of place....'other people's' stuff. She was only particular about her stuff. You stepson sound sounds very much like my daughter. But I couldn't say for sure if your stepson has OCD. Does he have a high level of anxiety about you touching his stuff...does the sock thing ever make you late getting out of the house? I guess I'm asking does teh OCD interfer w/ your life or is he just a little particular about his stuff? Amy PS - I'm a step mom too! From: Bunch <rd_bunchyahoo (DOT) com> Subject: Is this OCD To: @ yahoogroups. com Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 2:44 PM Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a gift he especially loved, or found an item/book/shirt he liked he would add it to his " special pile " which grew to about 5ft x 4ft in size. These items were sometime played with by him, but very rarely removed from his room. If he did wear a hoodie he loved he would talk about how he hoped that people who saw wouldn't remember it. His fathers house was a bit chaotic (messy) with not too much storage, so I ensured that his new room had lots of drawers and shelves. My step son moved his items over on his own terms, wanting to take all his special pile on one trip and he immediately tucked everything away into his new room. His room is very organized, everything in it's " right " spot and nothing on the floor, and he also refuses to take things out of his room and bring downstairs. I also find that things he particularly likes, he doesn't want to play with , and just tucks it away in a special spot. I find this very odd. These actions don't apply to the downstairs/communal areas of the house where he has no problem leaving his books all over or ripping apart the couch to build a fort. In addition to this, we also can't keep his fingers out of his mouth, this happens generally when he's reading, watching TV. Not only biting his nails but simply running his fingers across his teeth. There is also an issue with getting his socks on perfectly. Any insight would be helpful. thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Hi- I guess it doesn't really interfere with our life.., although his sock thing (partic. the seam along the toes) can hold us up a bit when we leave. He doesn't seem to mind us touching his stuff, but if i bring something out of his room to see if he'll play with it, he generally won't and then asks me to return it to it's spot and he'd rather play with it there. Some toys are allowed downstairs, but generally they stay there and don't make the trip upstairs. If he grabs a book from downstairs for a bedtime story, he'll ask us to return it back downstairs when we're done. He does sound like your daughter. Subject: Re: Is this OCD To: Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 11:53 AM I don't know if it is OCD, but sock thing is very common w/ OCD kids. My step-daughter had fits w/ socks from age 3 to about 6 or so. And she also would not play w/ her toys, and did not want anything moved or removed from her room, but had no problems leaving stuff around the house out of place....'other people's' stuff. She was only particular about her stuff. You stepson sound sounds very much like my daughter. But I couldn't say for sure if your stepson has OCD. Does he have a high level of anxiety about you touching his stuff...does the sock thing ever make you late getting out of the house? I guess I'm asking does teh OCD interfer w/ your life or is he just a little particular about his stuff? Amy PS - I'm a step mom too! From: Bunch <rd_bunchyahoo (DOT) com> Subject: Is this OCD To: @ yahoogroups. com Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 2:44 PM Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a gift he especially loved, or found an item/book/shirt he liked he would add it to his " special pile " which grew to about 5ft x 4ft in size. These items were sometime played with by him, but very rarely removed from his room. If he did wear a hoodie he loved he would talk about how he hoped that people who saw wouldn't remember it. His fathers house was a bit chaotic (messy) with not too much storage, so I ensured that his new room had lots of drawers and shelves. My step son moved his items over on his own terms, wanting to take all his special pile on one trip and he immediately tucked everything away into his new room. His room is very organized, everything in it's " right " spot and nothing on the floor, and he also refuses to take things out of his room and bring downstairs. I also find that things he particularly likes, he doesn't want to play with , and just tucks it away in a special spot. I find this very odd. These actions don't apply to the downstairs/communal areas of the house where he has no problem leaving his books all over or ripping apart the couch to build a fort. In addition to this, we also can't keep his fingers out of his mouth, this happens generally when he's reading, watching TV. Not only biting his nails but simply running his fingers across his teeth. There is also an issue with getting his socks on perfectly. Any insight would be helpful. thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Hi there and welcome to the group. It sounds like your stepson has had some changes in his life. Sometimes children who go through changes (both in who cares for them, and where they live) like to have a sense of security. Perhaps your stepson feels that his " special " things should not be played with or used in order to keep them " special. " In other words, keeping them in one spot and not playing w/them will ensure they stay new and special and he will know where they are. This could be a security issue. As for the sock thing, I think this is very common in lots of kids- not just those who have OCD. The feeling of not having the seam at the end of your toes can be irritating. If you browse through some of the pages here, you will see that many children who have OCD have compulsions and thoughts that they are unable to control. These thoughts and compulsions cause a fear factor to them. Does your little guy have these kinds of symptoms? It sounds like your little one may be trying to control his surroundings due to the lack of control in his own life. Allowing him to do this in his room might actually benefit him and help him feel comfortable in his new surroundings. I hope this helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 I second all of this and would like to add a simple tip to help with the sock thing -- let him wear his socks inside out.? This made a HUGE difference at our house. Lee Re: Is this OCD Hi there and welcome to the group. It sounds like your stepson has had some changes in his life. Sometimes children who go through changes (both in who cares for them, and where they live) like to have a sense of security. Perhaps your stepson feels that his " special " things should not be played with or used in order to keep them " special. " In other words, keeping them in one spot and not playing w/them will ensure they stay new and special and he will know where they are. This could be a security issue. As for the sock thing, I think this is very common in lots of kids- not just those who have OCD. The feeling of not having the seam at the end of your toes can be irritating. If you browse through some of the pages here, you will see that many children who have OCD have compulsions and thoughts that they are unable to control. These thoughts and compulsions cause a fear factor to them. Does your little guy have these kinds of symptoms? It sounds like your little one may be trying to control his surroundings due to the lack of control in his own life. Allowing him to do this in his room might actually benefit him and help him feel comfortable in his new surroundings. I hope this helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Hi there, Have you found the ocfoundation.org website yet? Under " education " you will find a guide to parents about OCD, and in that you will find " symptoms " of OCD. Reading about what OCD can look like may help. Generally there is anxiety/fear around thoughts and/or compulsions. Your step son's need to have his toys in their proper place, may just be his way, or may be early signs of OCD stuff, if not full fledged OCD. The sox thing too. Ours showed lots of signs like this when he was young, very particular and even rigid in certain ways, and some quirky other things, but nothing that we could have recognized overtly as OCD. You might ask him if he has thoughts that repeat in his head, or if he ever needs things to feel " just right " (a type of OCD, hard for them to really describe). Do you notice him getting stuck on things at times, other than the sox thing? Since we all do things that are obsessive or compulsive in nature, the difference for someone with OCD is that they cannot stop, and the obsessions take up an hour a day or more and cause lack of function, as well as a great deal of anxiety. Having said that, things can start mild and grow, so it's good that you are doing your research on this so you will know what to look for. It is much easier to manage this disorder when it is mild rather than when it gets severe, so it is definitely in your interest to address any symptoms early. Best of luck on this and congrats on your " new " (?) marriage. Warmly, Barb Just > > From: Bunch <rd_bunchyahoo (DOT) com> > Subject: Is this OCD > To: @ yahoogroups. com > Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 2:44 PM > > Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. > we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a gift he especially loved, or found an item/book/shirt he liked he would add it to his " special pile " which grew to about 5ft x 4ft in size. These items were sometime played with by him, but very rarely removed from his room. If he did wear a hoodie he loved he would talk about how he hoped that people who saw wouldn't remember it. His fathers house was a bit chaotic (messy) with not too much storage, so I ensured that his new room had lots of drawers and shelves. My step son moved his items over on his own terms, wanting to take all his special pile on one trip and he immediately tucked everything away into his new room. > His room is very organized, everything in it's " right " spot and nothing on the floor, and he also refuses to take things out of his room and bring downstairs. I also find that things he particularly likes, he doesn't want to play with , and just tucks it away in a special spot. > I find this very odd. These actions don't apply to the downstairs/communal areas of the house where he has no problem leaving his books all over or ripping apart the couch to build a fort. > In addition to this, we also can't keep his fingers out of his mouth, this happens generally when he's reading, watching TV. Not only biting his nails but simply running his fingers across his teeth. There is also an issue with getting his socks on perfectly. Any insight would be helpful. thanks > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Hi , he does seem very particular about his things and having his room neat. I guess " neat " would be the word, everything back in its place. Or book from downstairs taken back down, etc. Since he seems fine with " messing up " other things/areas.... Sounds like he doesn't get overly upset if something is moved, taken out? I'm just a mom but with 3 sons, all pretty much grown now. I don't think this is " OCD " but can't say it might not develop into something later? Only 1 of my sons has OCD. The rest of us have our little OCD-type quirks about certain things, etc. Another son was more " OCDy " in his younger years (about age 5 and younger), very neat about stuff, hated to get dirty, went thru an OCD " stage " earlier but that all later passed. (YAY!) Yet another was very particular about any of us bothering his stuff; refused to share any books that were " his " , afraid someone would bend a page or something; if sat on his bed, wanted it changed or would toss a clean sheet/blanket over the other.... I re-check a few things. This is what I mean by " quirks. " OCD is more when it starts to interfere with life, taking up time, causing lots of anxiety, stress.... Like when the disorder is taking control. (very simply put there) So with your stepson, I don't know if it's a " quirk " , he likes to be " neat " (I envy that, LOL) or if there's more leaning to OCD. ---- Gee, I'm no help am I? The sock thing -- oh yes, my OCD-stage son also went thru that when young. (I keep saying " young " , he's 20 now) His shoes had to be tied tight enough and he hated almost all socks. Even took scissors once to try to cut the little knot out of the seams, etc. I also vote for trying to wear the socks insideout, it can help at times. Mine would have tears over not getting socks to be " right " or shoes tied tight enough, etc. Oh, there are also " seamless " socks that can be bought; don't know about stores but have seen them online. I wonder if part of stepson is doing any hoarding? It might just be that his special stuff he wants to keep " special " - he is just 5. But sometimes kids begin to collect too much and don't use anything but won't throw away or store anywhere else, etc., and it starts to be a problem. I guess it's something I would keep an open mind on and an eye on -- that it could be or become OCD, etc. Quick thoughts, > > Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. > we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 Thanks to everyone, this has been really helpful. Since things generally don't seem to be interfering with our day to day, I'm thinking it's probably a control thing...since he refuses to bring things back and forth between his mama's and our place as well...and that's understandable. I'll keep my eye on him though. Thanks very much for your help! (the sock idea is great!) Subject: Re: Is this OCD To: Date: Monday, February 16, 2009, 3:00 PM Hi , he does seem very particular about his things and having his room neat. I guess " neat " would be the word, everything back in its place. Or book from downstairs taken back down, etc. Since he seems fine with " messing up " other things/areas. ... Sounds like he doesn't get overly upset if something is moved, taken out? I'm just a mom but with 3 sons, all pretty much grown now. I don't think this is " OCD " but can't say it might not develop into something later? Only 1 of my sons has OCD. The rest of us have our little OCD-type quirks about certain things, etc. Another son was more " OCDy " in his younger years (about age 5 and younger), very neat about stuff, hated to get dirty, went thru an OCD " stage " earlier but that all later passed. (YAY!) Yet another was very particular about any of us bothering his stuff; refused to share any books that were " his " , afraid someone would bend a page or something; if sat on his bed, wanted it changed or would toss a clean sheet/blanket over the other.... I re-check a few things. This is what I mean by " quirks. " OCD is more when it starts to interfere with life, taking up time, causing lots of anxiety, stress.... Like when the disorder is taking control. (very simply put there) So with your stepson, I don't know if it's a " quirk " , he likes to be " neat " (I envy that, LOL) or if there's more leaning to OCD. ---- Gee, I'm no help am I? The sock thing -- oh yes, my OCD-stage son also went thru that when young. (I keep saying " young " , he's 20 now) His shoes had to be tied tight enough and he hated almost all socks. Even took scissors once to try to cut the little knot out of the seams, etc. I also vote for trying to wear the socks insideout, it can help at times. Mine would have tears over not getting socks to be " right " or shoes tied tight enough, etc. Oh, there are also " seamless " socks that can be bought; don't know about stores but have seen them online. I wonder if part of stepson is doing any hoarding? It might just be that his special stuff he wants to keep " special " - he is just 5. But sometimes kids begin to collect too much and don't use anything but won't throw away or store anywhere else, etc., and it starts to be a problem. I guess it's something I would keep an open mind on and an eye on -- that it could be or become OCD, etc. Quick thoughts, > > Hi, I am a new stepmon to a very sweet articulate little 5 year old who is exhibiting some behaviors which I am a little confused about. Granted I haven't had much exposure to little ones in the past, so perhaps I'm over reacting. > we have shared custody with his mother and he and his father have moved into my house (6 weeks ago) however this behavior existed before the move. At his previous residence when ever he received a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2009 Report Share Posted February 16, 2009 My son who is oCd and severe anxiwty plus sensory integration disordered had this for a looong time nd it still flares up- I would say it defianely came from the sensory stuff. Once you start reading and making the connections you will be amazed at what goes together and how they respond to sensory stuff things you never would think are sensory really are. PS OT really helped us alot for this too > > My son has OCD in germs and stuff but he is obsessed about people > watching him..... at school he wont put up his hand or ask the teacher > a question or do anything that could cause attention be it positive or > negative...... so if he is sick he won't ask to come home, if he is > missing a part of an assignment or didn't get the question he won't > ask..... If they are doing sports he gets so worked up that everybody > is watching him (even though they arn't), if he forgets his glasses to > school, he would come home leaving his bag there and not tell a > teacher crying and upset because the kids may hve seen him without > glasses. (we live 5 minute walk away from school). He had the chance > to go on a Harly son motor bike at a gala, and I could see he > wanted to but he couldn't do it because he felt the whole gala was > watching him and so on...... He really believes the whole world just > stops and watches him all the time. The psychologist said there was a > name for this but can't remember it to look it up.... > Just wondering if thisis OCD or part of his low self esteem. > > Cheers and thanks in advance Jackie (New Zealand) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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