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Re: signs and community

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In a message dated 8/7/2006 10:04:33 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

dmartin336@... writes:

What about just sucking up the courage to meet your neighbors, introduce

your child (have a block party or something). Let them know of your concerns

so

that if your child does go out and about the neighbors know his name and

make sure he's not harmed.

All my neighbors know about Maddie; we've lived in this house for 14 years.

I've spoken with them all, and even did up a *Maddie MO* and gave it to our

police station. But you have to understand that it's not that simple in a

lot residential areas. We live in the city. Our local police

headquarters is used to dealing with hard crime. My neighborhood is nice,

but you go

4 blocks in a different direction, and it looks HUGELY different...that's the

way big cities are. I gave the police my Maddie MO, along with a box of

madeliene cookies I made, and honestly, I thought the woman cop was going to

look inside to make sure it wasn't a bomb!!!!!

<<When my son would decide to go visit the neighbor boys their

mom and the kids were aware and welcoming...mom and the kids were aware and

relationships. >>

Again, I have to say that the way the autism manifests itself in Maddie,

visiting neighbors is not something she does. We are still at the stage where

she can't go ANYWHERE that's not 100% familiar to her (or where she's in her

stroller, aka safe zone, and even then she's often terrified). And people?

Well, we're working towards that goal as well. The last IEP we had for

Maddie, Duff and I talked with the team about all her goals, and we had to be

honest and say that the number one priority for our family, MOST times, is

keeping her alive. Sounds funny to a lot of people, but we spend SO much

time making sure her environment is safe, and that her IEP team is doing the

same.

I don't know that a sign is an answer. But I don't judge folks for opting

to get one, saying whatever it is they feel might help their family keep

their child safe.

Just an honest opinion....not trying to be controversial here.

Donna

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Donna M,

I recognize your name from some other lists that I also subscribe to

and I had to stop for a moment because Joan's son is also named

Andy...

Welcome to DS-autism! Why don't you tell us more about your family

and your work? (I know that you have tons of resources at your

fingertips, but I can't remember if it was because of your job or you

are extremely quick to stay on top of things and share them with

others.) I don't recall stories about your son, so please do

share....

Your Andy sounds like he is doing remarkably well if he is able to

move around the neighborhood independently and use a cell phone.

Most of our kids on this DS-autism list are much more restricted due

to the way autism affects their speech and language capabilities. I

can't think of too many others who have described their kids with the

dual dx being able to converse on the telephone, let alone be

responsible for their own cell phone. I think that for the most

part, most of our kids are extremely limited (i.e, non-verbal)

verbally, although I know there are some kids (sorry, and adults!)

who are able to converse.

At 16, my son will sing songs to people on the other end of the

phone- it means he doesn't have to have a real conversation! He is

just now beginning to listen to them, but since turn-taking in his

communication skills is still really tough, we are always thrilled

when he actually stops to listen to the person on the other end.

As for moving around the neighborhood, again, that is wonderful that

your Andy is able to be so independent. Like many others on this

list, my Pete takes off at a moment's notice and we have had to have

all kinds of locks put on our house. (Plus a 911 call and many

minutes of drop-dead panic when he took off..) I am always happy

when we are able to walk in a crowded area or even in our

neighborhood without having to link my arm through his. He is so

impulsive that he might run up to someone passing by and try to

snatch their hat or glasses. He has *me* conditioned to be ready to

go after him at a moment's notice. So even though right now he

appears to be maturing out of this some, it feels like I can never

relax and let my guard down.

The biggest independent thing that Pete has done successfully in

recent months is to carry in the empty trash can and recycling bins

on trash day. We have a very long driveway, and I can finally trust

him to gather the bins and bring them back up to the garage without

running willy-nilly away from me and into the neighbor's drive or

worse, across our moderately busy street. I can stand at the garage

and wait for him without having to be at his elbow. This has been

HUGE.

I haven't been posting much, but my goodness, there are a lot of new

members! Welcome everyone!

Beth Mum to Pete (AKA Ben) age 16 central Ohio

PS In Bexley, a small urban town tucked inside of Columbus, there

are signs EVERYWHERE on the streets that have 25 MPH speed limits

saying " SLOW DOWN AND LET OUR CHILDREN GROW UP " .

Hmm... Works for me....

At 5:39 PM +0000 8/8/06, wrote:

>Now we let Andy go out and about as long has he has his cell phone with him.

>You can NOT start too early on that skill. Andy has his phone by his side

>and has begun calling us during the day just to check in. He is 20 now and yes

>we leave him alone in the house. But the neighbors know him, he has his phone

>with speed dial and photo match. It's been a long road...start it now.

>

>Donna ez

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I agree totally with that sign! It says it all!

Liz

Re: Re: signs and community

" SLOW DOWN AND LET OUR CHILDREN GROW UP " .

This one I like!!

Joan

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GREAT!!!!!

Sara - Choose to make lemonade, not complain about the lemons.

>

>Reply-To:

>To:

>Subject: Re: Re: signs and community

>Date: Tue, 8 Aug 2006 18:23:48 -0700 (PDT)

>

> " SLOW DOWN AND LET OUR CHILDREN GROW UP " .

>

>

>This one I like!!

>

>Joan

>

>__________________________________________________

>

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In a message dated 8/8/2006 8:58:15 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

ppaul1@... writes:

At 16, my son will sing songs to people on the other end of the

phone-

Yes, and I've had that pleasure!!! Elvis, wasn't it MB???? ;-)

Donna

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