strangest thing...

[Guest guest]

My mom's lower eyelids are drooping in the inside corners. VERY noticably!

They weren't like that yesterday, or the day before, and she's not acting

tired...but it's not the whole lower eyelid, it's just the inside corners,

closest to her nose, and it gives her a very strange look. No med changes

either. What in the world???

Saturday we were having a pig roast at our church, and went with us.

She had a BLAST! She was the life of the party, out on the patio with the

smokers (including the pig - hahaha!) and keeping everybody in stitches.

She also helped me to set up the tables with all the dishes people brought

in, set up the dinnerware, etc...helped newcomers with nametags, and really

was in her element. Very VERY lucid!

On Friday I'll be riding on our church's float in the parade, playing my

keyboard...I was working on the music and needed a bridge but nothing would

come to me so I ran over to the NH and asked my mom if she'd come over and

help, and she did...ended up spending the afternoon and all evening, and she

was better than I've seen her in YEARS! What really shocked me was that she

had NO short-term memory issues, or long-term either...NONE of the paranoia

that we've been seeing for the last few years (and even longer, to a lesser

degree)...NO issues with her " stuff " ...in fact she mentioned at one point

that she's got plenty of clothes there and doesn't have space for any more,

anyway (!!!)...then we got back and she started asking me questions about

LBD and I answered her as I always have, she asked about her finances, and I

told her the truth. We talked about when she crashed in March and April

(that led to her placement at King's), about her horrible black depressions

and hospitalization, she wanted to know how I was feeling during that time,

we talked and cried together, she thanked me for all I did for her, and

continue to do, and told me I wasn't to worry about her because she's found

her place there (at the NH), and she'll be fine, she enjoys being around all

the people and helping out, and she appreciates that I did so much for her

when she couldn't do anything for herself. She also said that she's fine

with me being her guardian, and with Gwen taking care of her business...

There's SO much more, we talked for an hour, in the day room overlooking the

lake. This weekend, and our talk about EVERYTHING last night, even about

issues in her marriage to my dad (they were divorced when I was 23), even

about the things she said about Gwen and me in her paranoid confusion,

EVERYTHING - this weekend I got to know my mother. All the walls were down,

all the secrecy, the manipulations and mindgames that she's played for as

far back as I can remember, it was all gone. And her memory - and

memories - were intact. And her reasoning. She was sincere, honest,

genuine, loving, selfless, intelligent...all the best of was there,

and none of the worst. Literally, I feel like I met my mother, finally. It

was such an enormous blessing that I cried again when I got home, and again

while talking to Gwen about it.

I know that the Lewy's are cruel and will take her away again, and that they

could bring back the paranoia and confusion and worse. But this weekend,

and during our talk last night, I was given an amazing gift that will hold

me through whatever is going to come, because this has been the very first

time that I have been with my mom and there were no walls, no suspicions, no

reservations, no manipulations, no secrets...just me and my mom. What an

incredible, indescribable, unexpected gift!

Today she called me, and thanked me for the wonderful weekend. She talked

about all the things we did, and remembered all the details from the pig

roast and from yesterday. She said she had a great time playing my keyboard

and hanging out with all of my pets, and felt very much at home, and how she

likes where she lives now, but it's nice to have a change of scenery. I

missed her, after this weekend, and went to spend an hour with her after

supper, then had to come home because I still have quite a bit of work to do

in my shop tonight before bed (thanking the Lord that my business is going

so well). It is absolutely amazing what the right meds and the concentrated

therapy and behavior management techniques they've been using at King have

done for her. I never thought I'd see my mom as my mom again, let alone an

even better " version " of my mom...

His,

Sherry

www.owly.net

daughter of , (mis?)diagnosed with AD in 2005, descent slowed by

Aricept; diagnosed with LBD March 2008, in a wonderful NH 1/2 mile from my

house. We're learning to live with Lewy...