Re: New on here!

[Guest guest]

Welcome to the group! Yes, BP's team up on each other. In our family, at

least, you can definately tell when we're around my Nada. (Hubby and I JUST

had this conversation tonight, in fact) because they hoover the rest of us

(well, usually them) into picking on the " bad " kid. Usually they seem to be

joking, at least in my family, but the jokes hurt badly, and they're really not

that funny. And, really, they're not meant to be. They're meant to tear a

person down. If you say anything or complain about it, you're accused of

being hypersensitive and a " drama queen. " I had to talk to DH about it today,

b/c he's bad about getting into that when he's around my Nada. When we're

away, he's the sweetest, kindest man you'll know. Here, he's out of control,

and

he knows it. He apologized and acknowledged, and I let him know why it

bothers me so much, and a lot of other things. Anyway, I'm rambling.

Welcome to the group. I've not been here long, but I've found lots of help

here.

Kristi

[Guest guest]

Pookiepuki,

Welcome to the board. It's a great place for KO's of BP's.

Have you been diagnosed as BP, or is it a guess on your part?

As I understand it, most BP's don't admit to having it or even

seeing their own faults.

a

>

> Hi

>

> I'm a new member and I just wanted to post and introduce myself.

I have

> just come to the realization that my mother more than likely has

BPD and

> suddenly gives light to why I'm so messed up myself and why I tend

to

> sabotage my own relationships. I also believe that my brother

also has

> BPD and between the two of their influence I have pretty much

> permanently parked myself in counseling.

>

> A little background into my life, my childhood was filled with

abuse,

> not caring if I died, and neglect. I know this is a lot like

where BPD

> starts and why I question if I have it myself. But my BP mom and

BP

> brother seemed to bond together and torment me throughout my

childhood.

> And being the baby of the family didn't really help. Do BPs team

up

> together to tear down another person?

>

> But now I know that I need to try and distinguish with the coping

> mechanisms I have learned from my mom and the chance that I may

have BPD

> myself. It will be hard and I realize that my relationship with my

> mother is very destructive to me and my progression in dealing

with my

> problems. I am sabotaging a relationship with a man I love more

than

> anybody I have ever met. I don't want to but the relationship

would get

> me disowned and my mom would flip out. I am realizing now that my

fear

> of disappointing my mom is ruining my life and I want to be

happy. It

> is hard though. Which is why I joined this group for help and

support

> and objective opinions. I tend to attack those in my life who try

to

> give me advice because I don't want people to control me (my BPD

> tendencies).

>

> Thanks for listening to me and there will be more venting later I'm

> sure.

>

[Guest guest]

Pookie,

Welcome. Yes, often, though not always, " BPs team up

together to tear down another person. " I'm one of

many people whose FOO always `teamed up' against me.

It's affected all of my relationships, too. You're not

alone. Keep posting. Keep coming back.

One Non-BP Recovering Man

--- pookiepuki wrote:

> Hi

>

> I'm a new member and I just wanted to post and

> introduce myself. I have

> just come to the realization that my mother more

> than likely has BPD and

> suddenly gives light to why I'm so messed up myself

> and why I tend to

> sabotage my own relationships. I also believe that

> my brother also has

> BPD and between the two of their influence I have

> pretty much

> permanently parked myself in counseling.

>

> A little background into my life, my childhood was

> filled with abuse,

> not caring if I died, and neglect. I know this is a

> lot like where BPD

> starts and why I question if I have it myself. But

> my BP mom and BP

> brother seemed to bond together and torment me

> throughout my childhood.

> And being the baby of the family didn't really help.

> Do BPs team up

> together to tear down another person?

>

> But now I know that I need to try and distinguish

> with the coping

> mechanisms I have learned from my mom and the chance

> that I may have BPD

> myself. It will be hard and I realize that my

> relationship with my

> mother is very destructive to me and my progression

> in dealing with my

> problems. I am sabotaging a relationship with a man

> I love more than

> anybody I have ever met. I don't want to but the

> relationship would get

> me disowned and my mom would flip out. I am

> realizing now that my fear

> of disappointing my mom is ruining my life and I

> want to be happy. It

> is hard though. Which is why I joined this group

> for help and support

> and objective opinions. I tend to attack those in

> my life who try to

> give me advice because I don't want people to

> control me (my BPD

> tendencies).

>

> Thanks for listening to me and there will be more

> venting later I'm

> sure.

>

>

>

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[Guest guest]

Thanks so much for your replies. And I have noticed that my family

does tend to be a bit harsh. I developed a thick skin at a young age.

But my sister in law is having a lot of trouble with the abrasiveness

of it all. She may be a little overly sensitive, but my family is

hard to take. That makes sense.

>

> Welcome to the group! Yes, BP's team up on each other. In our

family, at

> least, you can definately tell when we're around my Nada. (Hubby

and I JUST

> had this conversation tonight, in fact) because they hoover the

rest of us

> (well, usually them) into picking on the " bad " kid. Usually they

seem to be

> joking, at least in my family, but the jokes hurt badly, and

they're really not

> that funny. And, really, they're not meant to be. They're meant

to tear a

> person down. If you say anything or complain about it, you're

accused of

> being hypersensitive and a " drama queen. " I had to talk to DH

about it today,

> b/c he's bad about getting into that when he's around my Nada.

When we're

> away, he's the sweetest, kindest man you'll know. Here, he's out

of control, and

> he knows it. He apologized and acknowledged, and I let him know

why it

> bothers me so much, and a lot of other things. Anyway, I'm

rambling.

> Welcome to the group. I've not been here long, but I've found lots

of help here.

>

> Kristi

>

>

>