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Re: Introducing Myself

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Hi Terry,

I see you made it over here to the Chronic Pain Group. Welcome! I

just sent you a response to your email from the DDD email

correspondence we have been sharing.

I've learned more from your introductory post to this group about

your plight, and it certainly sounds rough! I DO hope you have some

in-house help--friends, neighbors, or even something arranged

through the health care system. I know hospitals have occupational

therapists to help people with a lot of physical and ambulatory

problems such as yourself.

If you do decide to go through with the foot surgery be sure to inquire at the

hospital if they have an occupational therapist who could work with you and

possibly set you up with some help, at least at first for right after you come

home.

I don't see how you can endure much more, and my prayers and well

wishes will be going out to you.

These Groups seem to be really helpful. Perhaps I'll see you over

on the Fibromyalgia Group as well.

wrote:

> Hello to everyone, I don't know where to start with my story.

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  • 2 months later...
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Thanks for the welcome Gwen.

Doesn't sound to me like your problems are so minor. My girl scout co-leaders

dh has anklosing spondylitis and for a time that's what everyone thought I had

and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Besides, each of us has our losses that we

have had to bear because of our chronic pain and no one is here to judge who is

better or worse off than anyone else.

I've encountered quite a few people that are so quick to dismiss my problems,

or others like us with chronic pain, as minor because we are not dealing with a

life threatening illness or we haven't loss limbs, etc.

If I hear the words " You need to count your blessings " one more time, I'm going

to scream. As if we're not grateful? Like we're not bright enough to know that

there are people worse of than we are?

Just because there are, does that mean we do not have the right to mourn our

pain and the losses in our life because of our illnesses and chronic pain? It's

like saying that a man who lost his arm in battle doesn't have a right to mourn

the loss of the arm because he still has the other arm and his legs.

If you play that game, soon you are saying that the only person who truly has

the right to feel sorry for themselves is a person living in a third world

country who consists of nothing more than a headless, armless, legless, torso.

Last summer I ran across an old girl scout friend of mine who was not aware of

my injury and subsequent illnesses. As soon as she saw me she knew I wasn't

well and she wanted to know what was wrong. I proceeded to tell her about the

foot injury that led to the development of the Fibro and RSD.

She had tears in her eyes when I was done, and gave me a big hug. I then

proceeded to ask her what was new in her life, and she then went on to tell me

that she had just recovered from breast cancer.

Well, I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me whole! Here I had just

rambled on for 20 minutes about me when she was dealing with a life-threatening

issue. Chronic pain and fatigue that made me want to die at times was one

thing. Breast cancer was quite another. I told her exactly that.

My friend hugged me again, smiled and told me basically that I was wrong to feel

that way. Her breast cancer had been caught early and that she knew she was

going to be fine.

On the other hand, she said that her sympathies were with me, and that she was

going to pray for me every night from then on. I was absolutely dumbstruck,

until she told me that her beloved grandmother suffered from debilitating

Rheumatoid arthritis for 30 years.

Until her death her Grandma used to pray every night for just one pain free day.

That's all she wanted, one pain free day.

My friend knew how I felt. She said that watching her grandmother live in

chronic pain was absolutely devastating. The breast cancer she had just faced

was a small bump in her life, whereas my chronic pain was an uphill battle that

I would have to face every day for the rest of my life. By the time she was

done I was in tears. I just couldn't believe that someone I knew actually " got

it " .

So let's be careful not to minimize our own pain. Each of us faces our own

uphill battle and has the right to mourn our own losses due to chronic pain,

while counting our blessings along the way. :)

Miriana

>Gwen wrote:

>First I want to say, I am so sorry for all of your problems. Reading your post

makes me forever grateful for my minor problems.

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--- miriana Ivanovic-Hoff wrote:

>

> So let's be careful not to minimize our own pain. Each of us

faces our own uphill battle and has the right to mourn our own losses

due to chronic pain, while counting our blessings along the way. :)

>

>

Beautifully said, Miriana!

Cheryl in AZ

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