You Know You Live In AZ If....

[Guest guest]

These were written with tongue in cheek so please don't accept as gospel truth.

Enjoy!

YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN AZ IF.......

You've signed so many petitions to recall governors you can't remember the

name of the incumbent.

You notice your car overheating before you drive it.

You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.

You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.

Youcan hear the weather forecast of 115 degrees without flinching.

You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour....and it will be over 100

degrees.

You discover in July it only takes two fingers to drive your car because your

steering wheel is so hot.

You can make sun tea instantly.

You run your a/c in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.

The best parking is determined by shade.....not distance.

You realize that " Valley Fever " isn't a disco dance.

Hotter water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one.

It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation and yet all the streets are

totally empty of both cars and people.

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

Sunscreen is sold year round, kept right at the checkout counter.

You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box.

Some fools will market mini-misters for joggers and some other fools will

actually buy them. Worse....some fools actually try to jog.

You know hot air ballons can't rise because the air temperature is hotter

than the air inside the ballon.

You see two trees fighting over a dog.

You can say " Hohokam " and people don't think you are laughing funny.

You see more irregation water on the street than there is in the Salt River.

You have to go to a fake beach for some fake waves.

You can pronounce " Saguaro, " " Tempe, " San Xavier, " " Canyon de Chelly, "

" Mogollon Rim, " and " Cholla. "

Your Christmas decorations include sand and 100 paper bags.

You think a red light is merely a suggestion.

You think 60 tons of crushed red rock makes a beautiful yard.

Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.

Vehicles with open windows have the right of way in the summer.

All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out

come the end of April.

You think someone driving wearing overn mitts is clever.

Most homes have more firearms than people.

People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically

assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.

You can finish a Big Gulf in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.

~ " If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the

entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. "