Re: thoughts ..... happen

[Guest guest]

Yes very interesting thank you. sounds like you had a spiritiual

experience. --

I didnt decide to quit my job. maybe someone else needed it more.

or could do a better job

i feel better about it than.

love, roslyn

- In Loving-what-is , " Rosemarie Sadjed "

wrote:

>

> Daaaahhh, again " I am not the Doer " !!!!!

>

> Andy´s discussion Karin´s quest ... stirring my mind throughout

> a couple of days (or weeks?)

>

> These days I´ve felt being absorbed by the issue ... couldn´t help

> *thinking* about it :-)))

>

> But I feel much better meanwhile ...

> seems that there is no more confusion for me ... or at least it´s

> less, so far ...

> I don´t know where the discussion has gone, is it stuck?

> or does it go on without me noticing ?

>

> I ´d like to share what I experienced yesterday.

> To me it is proving definitely what Andy has stated these days ...

> ( in my simple words I´m going to refer to: there is no *me* ,

> there are no decisions to be made ..., it´s rather that there are

> things being done " through " *me* .)

>

> I had planned to go to Germany the day before yesterday. I had a

> meeting with somebody in the afternoon in southern Germany,

> but before I get there I thought of taking some free time to have a

> look around and see some places I ´ve not yet got to know ...

>

> Some time ago I ´d heard of a certain place with a small church

> where they had a sacred place like a shrine of the Triple

> Goddess or The Three Holy Virgins being passed down from

> times long before Christianity. That´s what I wanted to know

> more about and investigate in.

>

> Then my car didn´t start.

> I had to go to the garage for fixing.

> But there was nothing to be found, nothing wrong with the car :-)

> ???!!!! The car was o.k.!

> Only I was late now.

> This was why I had to go to my meeting directly and I " thought " to

> leave the other program for next day.

> But next day developed in a different way!

> When I was driving through the land I watched the beautiful

> landscape ... as it seemed, a little bit forgetting about the Three

> " Virgines Capitales " I had wished to visit the day before.

>

> Then I happened to get into a region where I knew there was a

> town named Braunau which is the place where A. Hitler had

> been born!

> I somehow slightly stopped thinking about going there and

> answered to myself " No, never , why for heaven´s sake should I

> go there and see that place??? "

>

> But - to make the story short -- finally I did go there!

> I parked my car and set out to ask somebody for the house

> where Hitler was born.

> And that was the moment when I had .... how do I say? ... kind of

> a strong feeling that I DID NOT DECIDE !

> Something had made me go there - for a reason I don´t know.

>

> I got there to this place and saw a big stone taken from one of

> those camps (Mauthausen) and on the stone it read " Freedom,

> Peace and Democracy. No Fashism never, ever. Millions of

> Dead Reminding Us. "

> When I stood there reading these words and looking to the

> house where this man had been born, I suudenly was moved to

> tears ... and again it was like it wasn´t *me* feeling this emotion

> ...

> I was moved to tears, I felt like crying and I felt the shock to

> remember those many people in the concentration camps and

> so many men never come back from war ...

> I remembered them compassionately - AND - that moment I

> also felt a drive to apologize to this man, Hitler, to ask him for

> forgiveness because of the sufferings HE had endured.

>

> Don´t ask me why , but this was what *I* was thinking that

> moment.

> (And I wouldn´t tell that everybody, at least for now!)

>

> Two passages above I said " Something had made me go there,

> for a reason I don´t know. "

> And, yes, that was the moment when I was reminded of the

> discussions we´ve had here on this list recently.

> I experienced this moment in a way it is hard for me to talk about.

>

> I just decided to share it with you because it is my story of how

> the statement of " We are not the Doer " is true!

>

> I felt like the action (to go to this place) as well as the emotion I

> experienced in the presence of that stone was not *mine*, it

> didn´t come from me, maybe it can be said that it emanated from

> IT - that´s the term being used by Andy, as I learned, or:

> TOTALITY.

> What comes to my mind is also the TAO which I read stands for

> many different terms like The Way, The Meaning, Meditation, The

> Unquestionable, ... The Guidance.

> All These - in my understanding - are only attempts to express

> what our mind cannot get, by now.

>

> So, my story fo yesterday is a somehow picturesque experience

> and proof for me that I need not worry about decisions and plans

> to be made!

> I ´ve been thinking about - and rather bothering myself with - the

> question of how to make plans for a while.

> Now I can see maybe a little bit more clearly, that I really really

> need not think about that any more!

>

> I had plans to go and visit an old church, my car didn´t start ...

> and consequently my steps were led to another place.

> That´s it.

>

> If you would ask me - I feel that I´m unable to express my

> feeling about the whole story but, anyhow, I would say that it´s

> pretty far from being confused ... it´s rather peaceful, yes,

that´s it

> ... and it´s like there are no questions and no answers ... no

> need of ...!

>

> I thought it might interest some of you.

> Thank you for listening!

>

> Love,

> Rosemarie

>