I'm still here!

[Guest guest]

Gosh, I've missed you all so much! Things for me havestarted to calm down a little bit. Everything was incomplete chaos for a few weeks. I'm still waiting tohear from the surgeon that my paperwork has comethrough.

**Okay, that thought just prompted me to call my insurance co. I got the approval! Now I just need to decide if I should have the lift now at the same time or if I should wait. Given my current life circumstances, I obviously don't have $6000 to just throw down for a lift. But I will have around $15,000 in cash at the end of this crisis. Which, BTW, I was in court two days ago and the judge awarded me about$3,000/mo in child support alone. While that doesn't solve all of my problems I do feel better knowing that it's an order.

So here's the million dollar question...

I could easily use that $15 grand to pay off my debts or I could use part of it to pay for the lift and the other part for a down payment on a new car (he came and took my Volvo). Or I could just bank it because I might need it since I'm about to be living in the streets...I'm sure most of you are wondering how I could even think about spending the money on a lift right now,

So I'll tell you how...FEAR.

Try not to be judgmental here…I'm just being honest and asking for honest opinions. I'm certain everybody here can identify with what I'm about to say…

How can I start to heal from this disaster in my life if I don't feel good about myself?

If you ask me, I think I would go into depression...The surgeon told me that because I'm a DD once the implants were removed I would be very saggy. "Like a 70 year old woman." So at some point I will obviously start a new relationship with another man and I don't want my saggy chest to be an issue, but it will be. It will be an issue for me. I know me and I know I would never get physically close and therefore I would not get emotionally close or invested. What I see if a future of loneliness. So the answer is to obviously have the lift at some point. The question is, do I ask the court to give me the money now and have the surgery at the same time as removal. Or do I wait and have it done later possibly at a cheaper rate…(remember he wants $6,000 for the lift) Help ladies! I don't know what to do. I just know I don't want to make the wrong decision…

Christene

[Guest guest]

Hi Christene,

Glad you hear from you!! I figured there was alot going on in your

life, and am glad to hear that things are looking up. My opinion is

this - if not having a lift will stunt your emotional growth and

make it harder for you to move on after all the dust has settled,

then get it done. There may not be another time where you've got

$6000 available to you, and also if you get it done now, then you

only have to go through one surgery. I didn't need a lift because I

went from an A/B to a C, back to an A/B again, all in 6 months

time. However, if you're a DD, then it sounds like you probably

would have alot of extra skin after this surgery, and that might be

upsetting for you. Good to hear the child support issue worked in

your favor as well. It won't be long and the explant will be behind

you as well.

Sis

>

>

> [;] Gosh, I've missed you all so much! Things for me have

> started to calm down a little bit. Everything was in

> complete chaos for a few weeks. I'm still waiting to

> hear from the surgeon that my paperwork has come

> through.

>

> **Okay, that thought just prompted me to call my insurance co. I

got the

> approval! Now I just need to decide if I should have the lift now

at the

> same time or if I should wait. Given my current life

circumstances, I

> obviously don't have $6000 to just throw down for a lift. But I

will

> have around $15,000 in cash at the end of this crisis. Which, BTW,

I was

> in court two days ago and the judge awarded me about$3,000/mo in

child

> support alone. While that doesn't solve all of my problems I do

feel

> better knowing that it's an order.

>

> So here's the million dollar question...

>

> I could easily use that $15 grand to pay off my debts or I could

use

> part of it to pay for the lift and the other part for a down

payment on

> a new car (he came and took my Volvo). Or I could just bank it

because I

> might need it since I'm about to be living in the streets...I'm

> sure most of you are wondering how I could even think about

spending the

> money on a lift right now,

>

> So I'll tell you how...FEAR.

>

> Try not to be judgmental here…I'm just being honest and asking

> for honest opinions. I'm certain everybody here can identify with

> what I'm about to say…

>

> How can I start to heal from this disaster in my life if I don't

> feel good about myself?

>

> If you ask me, I think I would go into depression...

> The surgeon told me that because I'm a DD once the implants were

> removed I would be very saggy. " Like a 70 year old woman. " So

> at some point I will obviously start a new relationship with

another man

> and I don't want my saggy chest to be an issue, but it will be. It

> will be an issue for me. I know me and I know I would never get

> physically close and therefore I would not get emotionally close or

> invested. What I see if a future of loneliness. So the answer is

to

> obviously have the lift at some point. The question is, do I ask

the

> court to give me the money now and have the surgery at the same

time as

> removal. Or do I wait and have it done later possibly at a cheaper

> rate…(remember he wants $6,000 for the lift) Help ladies! I

> don't know what to do. I just know I don't want to make the

> wrong decision…

>

> Christene [;]

>

[Guest guest]

I'm so happy it's seems everybody understands my reasons/desire to get it done now. I feel so selfish about it but I'm thinking about how what I do today is going to effect me 6 months from now....

I'm feeling better since the round of abx. I'm not sweating to the degree I was before and the funky smell isn't as prominent. My skin has only gotten worse though. I'm sure I'll post pictures of my legs pretty soon. My arms and hands are really bad too. I don't think there will be a swimsuit season for me anytime soon…which sucks since I'll be living right on the coast! Honestly I think I could use another round of abx. Especially before they cut me open.

As for the "financial" portion...I won't be "fine" if he has anything to say about it. He's fighting me for the kids because he does not want to pay all of that money every month (yes, he's actually verbalized that) What's really sad is that he thought he had this whole thing figured out to the degree that literally everything was going to end up in his favor....remember how scared he had me because he was so confident? Ha! Well, there's nothing I can do about his financial suffering now....hate it for him!

I think once I get these things out, everything will start to improve for me between explant, final hearing, and getting the hell out of Georgia and making a fresh start, I see no reason to not start feeling better, at least a little bit. It just seems there are so many things weighing me down right now. I'm actually looking forward to the day that it all comes together at the end. Of course it helps that I'm not alone in this. I wonder if everyone truly realizes how genuinely grateful I am for the "friendship" of everyone here. I get to to laugh. I get to cry, I get to vent all of my frustrations. I get lots of free knowlege. You can't put a price on the wisdom of those who have walked before me. But best of all, I get to feel like I'm doing something to help others!

I'm hanging tough through all of these trials and tribulations because I'm sure you've already figured this out by now ~I'm not one to give up ~ Winners don't quit and quitters don't win and I intend to win!

Christene

>> Christene,> > It sounds like you're going to be fine financially -> even if there are some rough waters between now and> then. . . > > It sounds like you really need to get that lift - if> just for your mental wellbeing. . . My only caution> though is to have the money in hand before making any> commitments. > > I think you'll find, like most of us, that the money> you spend on explant is the best investment you can> make in yourself. . . It will allow you to do whatever> it takes to become financially independent, regardless> of what your (soon to be ex) does! . . . > > You've been through some rough times already . . .> Just keep in mind that the end is in sight - things> will sort themselves out and you'll be feeling better> before long.> > How have you been feeling lately? Is that infection> clearing up?> > Hugs and prayers,> > Rogene>

[Guest guest]

Christene,

If you plan to leave the state with the kids, you need

to plan very carefully. It's likely the court will

have a big say in whether or not you can move.

Document, document, document! . . . Save everything

that might prove why it's in your best interest to

leave. See if you can record phone calls. My daughter

was able to get the Califonia court to let her leave

with the kids . . . a really tough sell. . . I fear

she wouldn't be alive today if she hadn't.

Is your hubby still in the service? . . . I would

think it would be hard for him to gain custody if he's

subject to overseas assignments.

These guys think they're so smart - until the bill

comes due! LOL!

Hugs,

Rogene