tlblack2006

[Guest guest]

Thanks for your response. it is nice to know others understand. Yes I

often feel that my stable friends , no matter how good of a person

they are, could ever understand. I have 1 " normal " sister, but she is

20yrs. older than me, but she had the same nada and the same BPD

sisters. So, we are there for each other, but we live far apart. I

have a cousin through marriage who is like they way a mother should be

who also had a bad childhood. I'm lucky to have them. I have a guy who

entered my life about 2 years ago just at work, now we are becoming

friends. he is so " normal " and stable that is what draws me to him. he

is all those good things you want in someone(no not perfect), but good.

I don't think I could ever in a million years explain or have him

understand what it was like or why I am the way I am alot. It is so

hard to get close to someone and let that guard down. I feel so

uncomfortable around him sometimes because I don't feel " normal " , I

don't feel like I know who I am.

I'm working in theropy, but man I have a long road ahead of me.

Do you ever just feel lost? You know you can NEVER go back to the

dysfunction, but have no idea how to be " normal "