Disappointing People

[Guest guest]

Hi people,

Ive been working on my fear of disappointing people lately. Its really

pervasive, damn it. I think it started with the constant critcism I got from

Yeti (I was criticized for not taking criticism well enough, lovely BP logic

there). Now as an adult I really try to avoid disappointing people. Anyone

else experience anything similar?

[Guest guest]

My counselor has dubbed me a " people pleaser " . A good book about this

is The Disease to Please. I fear disappointing people to an unhealthy

extreme. I also have, in the past, ignored my own needs and wants to

attempt to make situations better for others, most likely due to the

fact that I was always trying to make my mom happy so I wasn't

subjected to her extreme verbal abuse and put downs. She would

withdraw love completely and show me nothing but hate when I

disappointed her. Before we went to no contact, she basically said I

was not a daughter she wanted, that she had my sister and she didn't

need me because I was an ungrateful brat.

With her, at least, I no longer attempt to please her. But I catch

myself doing it with everyone else, because it's just how I grew up

and I didn't know anything different. It has been quite a journey, one

in which I am still near the beginning of, discovering who I am.

Good luck, !

>

> Hi people,

>

> Ive been working on my fear of disappointing people lately. Its really

> pervasive, damn it. I think it started with the constant critcism I

got from

> Yeti (I was criticized for not taking criticism well enough, lovely

BP logic

> there). Now as an adult I really try to avoid disappointing people.

Anyone

> else experience anything similar?

>

>

>

>