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RE: OT: Recipe for not fretting

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Hi Michele,

The decision to not fret has to come from within. One needs to make a

decision to not fret about the things they cannot change. The weather, for

example. Mother Nature will do what she will do, and she does not consult

the Weather Channel before she does it.

Our son was in the Navy at the end of the Persian Gulf thing. Our friends

thought I was nuts when they asked if I was worried about him and I said no.

My fretting over him would not have benefited either of us. What good would

it have done him to come home and find his mother had fretted herself into

the local mental health facility?

Actually he had a much better chance of returning home from the Persian Gulf

alive than from a drive to the nearest city and back.

When I was first married I used to lie in bed at night and toss and turn and

fret about our lack of money. Then I discovered that I controlled the

channel and did not have to be slave to my thoughts. So, when I went to bed

I would lay there and picture in my mind one of my favorite places. A quiet

lake, trees, animals, soft breeze. . . The next thing I new it was morning.

At first it was a struggle because the money thoughts kept intruding. I just

kept pushing them out, until the peaceful scene won. Don't ask how long it

took. It was about 40 years ago and I don't remember. Besides, the time will

vary for each person who tries it.

I've just built on that over the years. If you'd like to chat about it

privately please do so.

Judith Alta

-----Original Message-----

From: the scorpio [mailto:rawbabymama@...]

You're welcome :)

My mom has no friends - literally- because she is so judgemental. She also

does not talk much with family outside of immediate because she can't stand

Cuban culture(we're Cuban). It makes me sad for her. Also, there would be

that whole control issue; if she had friends, they might have their own

lives and make decisions without her, kind of like me....which drives her

nuts!

She's about to go the doctor for heart problems because of the combination

of fretting over everything, SAD diet and weighing twice as much as she

should.

If you have any ways to channel that not fretting thing, let me know!

Sincerely,

Michele

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Judith,

Our heads aren't much different than a computer. When I had anxiety with

fearful thoughts like my husband was hurt again while I was at work and I'd

call with something trivial to make sure he wasn't, I learned that once a

negative thought began if you just said cancel a few times to yourself it

would stop it. Like switching programs. Once you learn how anything that

frets you really works it can give a different perspective. May not go away

but its easier to deal with.

> When I was first married I used to lie in bed at night and toss and turn

and

> fret about our lack of money. Then I discovered that I controlled the

> channel and did not have to be slave to my thoughts

Wanita

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So right you are about computers and brains.

You method was probably easier than mine. But whatever works is what to use.

Now all I have to do is " change the subject. " It all gets easier with time.

Judith Alta

-----Original Message-----

From: Wanita Sears [mailto:wanitawa@...]

Judith,

Our heads aren't much different than a computer. When I had anxiety with

fearful thoughts like my husband was hurt again while I was at work and I'd

call with something trivial to make sure he wasn't, I learned that once a

negative thought began if you just said cancel a few times to yourself it

would stop it. Like switching programs. Once you learn how anything that

frets you really works it can give a different perspective. May not go away

but its easier to deal with.

> When I was first married I used to lie in bed at night and toss and turn

and

> fret about our lack of money. Then I discovered that I controlled the

> channel and did not have to be slave to my thoughts

Wanita

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>So right you are about computers and brains.

>

>You method was probably easier than mine. But whatever works is

>what to use.

>

>Now all I have to do is " change the subject. " It all gets easier

>with time.

>

were you conscientious about changing the subject tags as well?

but in all seriousness, creative visualization can be an amazing tool to

eliminate or reduce negative thoughts and create positive ones. i just

skimmed your post, but if i recall correctly, that's what you described as

your strategy - substituting positive for negative thoughts.

Suze Fisher

Lapdog Design, Inc.

Web Design & Development

http://members.bellatlantic.net/~vze3shjg

Weston A. Price Foundation Chapter Leader, Mid Coast Maine

http://www.westonaprice.org

----------------------------

“The diet-heart idea (the idea that saturated fats and cholesterol cause

heart disease) is the greatest scientific deception of our times.” --

Mann, MD, former Professor of Medicine and Biochemistry at Vanderbilt

University, Tennessee; heart disease researcher.

The International Network of Cholesterol Skeptics

<http://www.thincs.org>

----------------------------

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LOL I hope so!

For me it's a matter of taking out the ugly pictures and putting in pretty

ones.

It's not easy. But it does work. And it gets easier with practice.

Judith Alta

-----Original Message-----

From: Suze Fisher [mailto:s.fisher22@...]

>So right you are about computers and brains.

>

>You method was probably easier than mine. But whatever works is

>what to use.

>

>Now all I have to do is " change the subject. " It all gets easier

>with time.

>

were you conscientious about changing the subject tags as well?

but in all seriousness, creative visualization can be an amazing tool to

eliminate or reduce negative thoughts and create positive ones. i just

skimmed your post, but if i recall correctly, that's what you described as

your strategy - substituting positive for negative thoughts.

Suze Fisher

Lapdog Design, Inc.

Web Design & Development

http://members.bellatlantic.net/~vze3shjg

Weston A. Price Foundation Chapter Leader, Mid Coast Maine

http://www.westonaprice.org

----------------------------

" The diet-heart idea (the idea that saturated fats and cholesterol cause

heart disease) is the greatest scientific deception of our times. " --

Mann, MD, former Professor of Medicine and Biochemistry at Vanderbilt

University, Tennessee; heart disease researcher.

The International Network of Cholesterol Skeptics

<http://www.thincs.org>

----------------------------

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