hurting

[Guest guest]

Well made sure I didn't have much time to dwell on things. He decided to start being very aggressive and refuse to do anything- he even fought us because he didn't want to go to the bathroom before he put on his goodnight last night. He has been peeing through the goodnight for the last few nights and he fought us for 2 hours then I just couldn't do it anymore Paige was crying and wanted to go to bed and I finally gave in- we never give in but it was just too much. Today he refused to get out of bed because he didn't want to go to school so here he is home today because how do you make an 8 year old get up and get dressed and get on the bus. I would have to pull him out and force him and then he would be aggressive all day at school so really what is the point? We have an appointment at the Dr. tonight so hopefully we can

figure out what is wrong. How is it going with you? Sorry this is so negative but it just seems like so much right now. Kellie

Subject: Re: hurtingTo: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) comDate: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AM

Kellie,

Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing then all of a sudden he said "Jinx"? It broke my heart. A month later we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention.

We willl get pictures out of Jinx and "Talk" about him. Was sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois

Re: hurting

AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other Holiday needs. Search Now.

[Guest guest]

Kellie, I understand! Don't apologize! I know and we all know on here that it is so hard! I know what you mean about the struggles with you are going through! kept saying today I hate school! I don't want to go! Then I take him to the bus and like every day I have to pick him up and give him to the assistant on the bus and usually thinks it is funny when he is doing this but today he had another look on his face like he really did not want to go! Things are still pretty rocky here and upsetting! With school, home etc! headbutted jim on Fri leaving Jim with a bacl and blue eyelid during a meltdown where he was being restrained! And yesterday he came running at me with his vsmile and split my lip! Then he had a major meltdown at the Olive Garden yesterday when we went there after church! It was just the kids and I!StacieSent via BlackBerry by AT&TDate: Mon, 10 Nov 2008 07:43:22 -0800 (PST)To: <AutismBehaviorProblems >Subject: Re: hurting Well made sure I didn't have much time to dwell on things. He decided to start being very aggressive and refuse to do anything- he even fought us because he didn't want to go to the bathroom before he put on his goodnight last night. He has been peeing through the goodnight for the last few nights and he fought us for 2 hours then I just couldn't do it anymore Paige was crying and wanted to go to bed and I finally gave in- we never give in but it was just too much. Today he refused to get out of bed because he didn't want to go to school so here he is home today because how do you make an 8 year old get up and get dressed and get on the bus. I would have to pull him out and force him and then he would be aggressive all day at school so really what is the point? We have an appointment at the Dr. tonight so hopefully we can figure out what is wrong. How is it going with you? Sorry this is so negative but it just seems like so much right now. KellieSubject: Re: hurtingTo: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) comDate: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AMKellie, Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing then all of a sudden he said "Jinx"? It broke my heart. A month later we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention. We willl get pictures out of Jinx and "Talk" about him. Was sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois Re: hurting AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other Holiday needs. Search Now.

[Guest guest]

Hi and Stacie,sorry to hear you are having a hard sunday,

monday. Sunday was major meltdown day for us too. Hope the day gets

better for you moms and children.

Best wishes,

Tishanne

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> Subject: Re: hurting

> To: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) com

> Date: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AM

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> Kellie,

>  Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the

missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some

autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing

then all of a sudden he said " Jinx " ? It broke my heart. A month later

we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J

wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and

looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention.

>  We willl get pictures out of Jinx and " Talk " about him. Was

sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois

>

> Re: hurting

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> AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other

Holiday needs. Search Now.

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Tishanne! I hope it is better for you too!StacieSent via BlackBerry by AT&TDate: Mon, 10 Nov 2008 16:14:58 -0000To: <AutismBehaviorProblems >Subject: Re: hurting Hi and Stacie,sorry to hear you are having a hard sunday, monday. Sunday was major meltdown day for us too. Hope the day gets better for you moms and children. Best wishes, Tishanne > > > Subject: Re: hurting > To: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) com > Date: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AM > > > > > > Kellie, >  Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing then all of a sudden he said " Jinx " ? It broke my heart. A month later we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention. >  We willl get pictures out of Jinx and " Talk " about him. Was sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois > > Re: hurting > > > > > > > > > AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other Holiday needs. Search Now. >

[Guest guest]

Hope for a calmer day for all of us. Kellie

Subject: Re: hurtingTo: AutismBehaviorProblems Date: Monday, November 10, 2008, 6:07 PM

Thanks Tishanne! I hope it is better for you too!Stacie

Sent via BlackBerry by AT & T

From: "tishannepatterson" <tishannepatterson@ yahoo.com>Date: Mon, 10 Nov 2008 16:14:58 -0000To: <AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) com>Subject: Re: hurting

Hi and Stacie,sorry to hear you are having a hard sunday, monday. Sunday was major meltdown day for us too. Hope the day gets better for you moms and children.Best wishes,Tishanne> > > Subject: Re: hurting> To: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) com> Date: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AM> > > > > > Kellie,> Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing then all of a sudden he said

"Jinx"? It broke my heart. A month later we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention. > We willl get pictures out of Jinx and "Talk" about him. Was sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois> > Re: hurting> > > > > > > > > AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other Holiday needs. Search Now.>

[Guest guest]

I totally understand

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Monday, November 10, 2008 6:11:19 AMSubject: Re: hurting

NO everyone it was . Right when I was writing the post Paige was dancing to the wiggles tape and she was being so cute that I didn't even notice I had put her name there. Just the normal Mom thing of getting there names mixed up in my head.

Subject: Re: hurtingTo: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) comDate: Sunday, November 9, 2008, 12:37 AM

Kellie,

Is that a flu she had? I know what youare talking about with the missing thing. J had a boxer for 13 years and I swear he had some autism too. We lost him in May and the first few days J said nothing then all of a sudden he said "Jinx"? It broke my heart. A month later we got another white boxer who was a little thing. At first J wouldn't have anything to do with it but now it is getting big and looking alot like Jinx and J is paying it some attention.

We willl get pictures out of Jinx and "Talk" about him. Was sick for a long time or did it jusy happen quikley? Lois

Re: hurting

AOL Search: Your one stop for directions, recipes and all other Holiday needs. Search Now.

[Guest guest]

That story is so beautiful and heartbreaking too. My son n is

six and still not quite verbal, but the way they do communicate when

they can is amazing isn't it. I am so sorry about . I would be

hurt too, but then sometimes I feel like I am a leaky water bottle as

it is. Since n's regression and diagnosis, he, his sister and I

have become all but invisible to our immediate family. Mostly, I have

learned to accept, but some days I want to scream in all of their

faces until spittle flies from my mouth and I turn purple, but that

probably would be counterproductive. Sometimes I feel that I am alone

in an ocean of pain, and sometimes I think I am just a big crybaby.

You experienced a huge loss and you have a right to feel hurt,

whether your family would acknowledge your feeling regardless of it's

truth is another story entirely. ---

AutismBehaviorProblems , Kellie Folkerts

wrote:

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> Lois,

> She died of bacterial meningitis and the next day went into

the hospital with that horrible flu that was going around.  They only

admitted him because of what happened to and he was on an I.V.

and ice packs that night and still had 105 temp.  He was only 3 1/2

and had very little language at the time.  When he was sick he didn't

make a sound-he didn't cry or call out he just laid there.  Since it

didn't get bad until about 11 pm if he was at home we would have lost

him as well.  They tested and all of us for that flu but

was the only one to test positive.  We tried to explain to that

went to heaven but he didn't really seem to notice she was

gone.  We had Paige 2 years later and when she was about 10 months

old I took all the baby stuff and put it away (swing,playpen etc.,)

while was in school.  That day he came home and just started

crying and pacing all around the house.  He couldn't stop and then I

> went to check on Paige who was napping and he came in her room

look at her and said baby and then he was okay.  He was afraid she

was gone like and it made me understand so much more about

him.  He couldn't tell us what he was thinking but the whole time he

was missing her just like us.  Not long ago when we got a new

computer and I hadn't loaded all the pictures into the slide show he

came to me with a pen and paper and said -  I wrote her name on

it and he went on google and did a search with her name.  He was

looking for her pictures!  I loaded them in and he just kept looking

at them and saying her name.  We always have cupcakes for dessert on

her birthday and we let balloons go at the cemetery.  Today it rained

all day so we didn't go together (i went alone)  we will all go on

Saturday.  Sorry this is so long.   Thanks for asking again it is

nice use her name especially today.  Kellie

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> Subject: Re: hurting

> To: AutismBehaviorProblems

> Date: Saturday, November 8, 2008, 3:11 AM

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> Kellie,

>  What happened to her? That is unreal that your friend said that! I

tell you, People can be so goofy in what they say. Can you talk to

your DH about her? She must have been a great little girl. ((HUGS))

Lois

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[Guest guest]

Thank you. It has been very emotional and the pain will always be there. The pain never goes away but I guess you just adjust to that being how you feel. I can tell how much you love your son from your post and I know what it feels like to be so alone in all of this. I hope you can find a way to make your immediate family understand what you are going through and that your family needs their love and support. Have you tried giving them a handout or a book on Autism? I hope you don't mind me saying but it sounds like you are overwhelmed emotionally and really need someone to talk to. Feel free to email me privately or through the group. This is a great group with a lot of experience and support to offer. Sometimes it helps just to know other people are going through the same things and maybe get some ideas on how

they have dealt with similar situations. Please know that even though it feels like it sometimes you are not alone. I'm not sure of your name but want to send you a hug (((( n's Mom )))) and a prayer for a good day today. Kellie > > > Subject: Re: hurting> To: AutismBehaviorProbl emsyahoogroups (DOT) com> Date: Saturday, November 8, 2008, 3:11 AM> > > > > > > > Kellie,> What happened to her? That is unreal that your friend said that! I tell you, People can be so goofy in what they say. Can

you talk to your DH about her? She must have been a great little girl. ((HUGS)) Lois> > Re: hurting>