Re: clothing issues and school

[Guest guest]

Does your son have a 504 plan or an IEP? Either way, I'd make sure the

principal and teachers know that he has this issue and let them know that you

are

working on it. Then you can slowly address the clothing issues using ERP - have

him wear something that he resists for a few minutes at a time and very

gradually work up to the point where he can wear it to school. Of course he has

to

be willing to work on this. This is really hard and may never work that well,

but it's worth a try. (My daughter actually ate a bite and a half of oatmeal

this morning - something that she has never in her entire LIFE managed to do

because of the texture. And she still won't wear socks...) Other than that, I'd

help him prepare to answer questions from friends about his " issues " - I think,

though, that most kids understand the " I hate the way it feels " thing. Most

kids have something that they can't stand (tight waists, hats, wool sweaters,

etc.). You'll probably have to work on a three-way compromise : something your

son, the principal and you can all live with.

Good luck!

in NV

[Guest guest]

Your email really touched home with me. My daughter (12) is starting a new

private school next week. The dress code is also for her to wear belts and

socks, docker style pants etc. My daughter has not worn socks in over two

years, not able to wear any pants with buttons, zippers, etc., and

definately not able to wear a belt. I don't know if your child is in

therapy, but we had our therapist write a letter to the principal and

teacher stating that she has OCD and one of her symptoms is not being able

to wear certain styles and types of clothes. I took it to the principal

today and the school said that they are more than happy to work with us. I

also printed up information on OCD to give to the school so they know what

to expect. Hope this is helpful!

>

>Reply-To:

>To:

>Subject: clothing issues and school

>Date: Sun, 15 Aug 2004 22:17:06 -0000

>

>I'm looking for suggestions from parents who have had clothing issues

>such as not wearing socks or belts and dealing with the school. Our

>10 y.o. OCD son will be entering 5th grade in a couple of days. Last

>year was ok because the school dress code was uniforms and we were

>able to find uniform pants with elastic waists and shirts did not

>always have to be tucked in. This year the uniform policy changed to

>street clothes but the principal is going to be much more rigid with

>tucking in of shirt tails, wearing belts, etc. Of course, our son

>wants to dress close to the same as his friends but he still has many

>clothing issues that we were able to " hide " last year without many

>people noticing. He did share with us that some kids made fun of him

>because he always pulled on his socks. He hasn't worn socks all

>summer so we're certainly not looking forward to that again either.

>(I'm not going to worry to much about that until winter hits.) Any

>suggestions for dealing with the school without drawing to much

>attention to his " SID " is certainly appreciated.

>Thanks

>

>

>

>

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[Guest guest]

I found generally that my daughter's teachers and principals were most

willing to work with us (and be patient) when I or her pdoc stated that

such-and-such thing was an OCD issue AND my child would be working on it in

therapy. That way the teachers could see progress, and a couple even

celebrated with her when she did finally show up wearing socks or whatever.

She had severe clothing/sensory problems from ages 4 (onset)-7. ERP (and

probably finally getting her SSRI worked out right) made a huge difference.

She was highly motivated to be able to wear leotards, swimsuits, jeans,

skirts, underwear(!) and so on as other girls her age did. Others I have

read have gotten on top of the clothing sensitivities with Occupational

Therapy. This perhaps is available through some schools, or of course

privately.

Today was my (now 10-year-old's) first day of fifth grade--middle school.

Sigh. She was up most the night :-( BUT only struggled briefly with socks

and new sneakers before announcing that the bad feelings would probably stop

as soon as she headed for the bus. What a major, major contrast to the

years when getting dressed, especially on a big " first day " like this with

new shoes on top of it, would have meant hysterical tears, anxiety and

frustration.

Take care,

Kathy R. in Indiana

----- Original Message -----

> Your email really touched home with me. My daughter (12) is starting a new

> private school next week. The dress code is also for her to wear belts and

> socks, docker style pants etc. My daughter has not worn socks in over two

> years, not able to wear any pants with buttons, zippers, etc., and

> definately not able to wear a belt. I don't know if your child is in

> therapy, but we had our therapist write a letter to the principal and

> teacher stating that she has OCD and one of her symptoms is not being able

> to wear certain styles and types of clothes. I took it to the principal

> today and the school said that they are more than happy to work with us. I

> also printed up information on OCD to give to the school so they know what

> to expect. Hope this is helpful!

[Guest guest]

In , " Kathy " <kathylr@a...>

wrote:

" Today was my (now 10-year-old's) first day of fifth grade--middle

school. Sigh. She was up most the night :-( BUT only struggled

briefly with socks and new sneakers before announcing that the bad

feelings would probably stop as soon as she headed for the bus.

What a major, major contrast to the years when getting dressed,

especially on a big " first day " like this with new shoes on top of

it, would have meant hysterical tears, anxiety and frustration.

Take care,

Kathy R. in Indiana "

Kathy-

So great to hear that Kellen was able to face fifth grade issues

with relatively minimal struggles. I love to hear of continued

success in our kids.

How are *you* doing with middle school? If it's anything like at

our house, my children were very ready...I had more trauma realizing

they were growing up. Just wait until high school and college...(my

oldest is a sophomore in college; middle son is a junior in high

school...next year I'll be a wreck because my 'baby' will be

starting high school...I think I need to go get the kleenex box now!)

Blessings-

(Ohio) Anne (13)