Re: New here - Looking for Advice/Support

[Guest guest]

Hi, Cristina. It sounds like OCD to me too and I don't think she's acting up

because you are pregnant. How could a three year old come up with that sort

of behavior? It's not normal--even as a reaction to life changes. Sometimes

OCD is like a scratch-and-sniff--it's there and when something " scratches " it,

it starts to " stink. " Maybe the baby coming is the " scratcher. " Both of my

daughters have OCD, as do I and several other family members. My youngest one

has always shown signs and I can tell you that the sooner you get help for

her, the easier your life will be! I know that now is not the time for you to

start making extra doctor appointments but many children/adolescent

psychiatrists have pretty long waits for appointments. There are some books you

might

want to look at, including " Freeing Your Child From Obsessive-Compulsive

Disorder " by Tamar Chansky and any book on OCD or anxiety by Aureen Pinto

Wagner.

Wagner has a book called " Up and Down the Worry Hill " which is written for

small

children. I bought it even though my youngest is ten! Good luck and please

keep posting--this group has been wonderful for me! Kelley in NV

[Guest guest]

Cristina,

That might be possible to be related to picking up on the stress

from your pregnancy. I think sometimes when people have a tendency

or predisposition towards OCD (runs in family or something), that

stress can trigger behaviors. It's amazing what all stress and

anxiety can affect and trigger in the body. And with toddlers, they

tend to go through a stubborn " my way " phase a lot of times anyway,

that I guess could get worse if OCD gets added in. I know with

that I knew it was OCD behaviors but at that time hadn't read about

therapy and treatment; didn't do that until began having

problems at age 11.5.

Keep us updated on how things are going!

>

>

> Thank you so much for your detailed e-mail! I hope my daughter

ends up being like and stopping this behavior, of course. A

few people have told me she may be picking up on stress from my

pregnancy and acting this way... but I'm not too sure.

>

> Either way, I'm keeping an eye on it and going to place a few calls

just in case.

>

> Thanks.

> Cristina

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Cristina, welcome! Yes I would also be concerned about your daughter's

behavior especially with OCD in the family. My daughter's OCD began when

she was four, hers was triggered by a strep infection. Has your daughter

been ill lately or within the past few months with a strep infection? There

is a subset of kids whose OCD is autoimmune and triggered by strep. This is

called PANDAS (pediatric autoimmune neuropsychiatric disorders associated

with streptococcus). There are files or links for information about PANDAS

at the group home page. The hallmark of this is abrupt, literally overnight

onset of obsessions and compulsions that happens at the same time the

child's circulating strep antibodies are elevated (which can occur some time

after a strep infection has cleared.)

If you feel something is not right, I would suggest taking your daughter to

a child psychiatrist for evaluation rather than relying on the pediatrician

and his advice. The reason is many pediatricians are not too aware of

problems such as OCD and may believe that a young child cannot have it. Our

ped also told me to ignore or consequence my child's behavior, and told me

she was probably just repeating words she had heard (she was obsessing about

death and mutilation.) But her extreme distress over these thoughts told me

she wasn't just parroting words she didn't understand.

The telling bit is that your daughter herself is distressed when she can't

get her walking or whatever " just right, just so " and feels she must start

over again or else. Also that she is trying to get you to do these things

right and start over when you don't. You describe her as " making a huge

scene " when prevented from starting over and that it's taking a toll on her.

I'm betting this behavior is out of character for her. OCD controls kids by

sending them a huge jolt of anxiety when they do a thing " wrong " and a bit

of relief from the anxiety when they finally get it " right " which is highly

motivating to say the least--more so than pleasing Mom, avoiding punishment,

etc. This process is different from a child who is perhaps worried about a

new brother or sister and acting out or seeking attention by being willful,

though it is often mistaken for willful behavior.

OCD can be triggered in a person predisposed to it by a stressful situation,

such as a move, a death in the family, and etc. so news of a little brother

or sister on the way could have kicked this off in her. (If not that, then

some other stressor could just have easily done it, or illness as I

mentioned above.)

Write in again with any further questions, and let us know how things go.

Take care,

Kathy R. in Indiana

----- Original Message -----

> Hi,

>

> I'm writing on behalf of my dd who is 3 yo. She has not been diagnosed

with OCD, but I'm really concerned about her recent behaviors, specifically

repeating or " starting over " (as she calls it) her walking or running. She

will start walking in a certain direction and then turn around and start

again from where she originally was and do the same thing again and again.

This started a few weeks ago and started with only doing it twice, but now

she'll go back and forth several times until she's satisfied. It takes it's

toll on her, too. At times she just keeps doing it and then goes about her

business, but at times she gets really frustrated with herself and will

continue to do something while starting to cry. I called her pediatrician

yesterday and I was told to ignore her behavior - it may just go away and be

a 3 yo thing. Well, I stay home with my daughter and we are together all

the time that I just feel something is not right or at least I need to look

into it. I've tried asking her " why are you playing that silly game? " and

she says " I messed up " and " I need to start over " . There have even been

times where she wants me to start over with her and start walking from a

specific location we were at and walk back again. I was doing it for a

while, but now I don't and just say if you feel you messed up, you can start

over, but I don't think you did anything wrong and I haven't done anything

wrong so I'm not starting over. The only time I have been starting over

with her is at the checkout lines at a store she has twice wanted to walk

back to the line and " start over " and starts crying causing a huge scene

begging " mommy to start over, too " . It's mainly walking, but also getting

her into her car seat - she'll bounce down as soon as I put her in and then

say " do it again " . I ask her why and she says " I messed up " . This is

really taking its toll of me as I'm not familiar with her acting this way

and I'm not sure how to respond. I'm also 36 weeks pregnant and so of

course I'm hormonal as well as !

> trying t

> o understand and *fix* it, but don't know if there is a way to fix her

behavior.

>

> I'm not sure if I'm taking the right approach or not or where to go from

here. Should I see if this continues for another month or so? Does this

sound like OCD to you? Although my mom has never been diagnosed I do

believe she has OCD - her house has to be spotless and if anything has been

moved from its original location she notices and fixes it right away. Maybe

I have a little myself as I check the stove and windows a few times before

leaving the house if we are going to be gone for the day and I check the

garage door a couple of times before driving off.

>

> Any advice you can give me on helping my daughter would be greatly

appreciated.

>

> Thank you.

> Cristina