Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 Hi , I remember blasting into Kel's pdoc's office and saying " I thought people with OCD didn't *do* the things they were obsessing about!!!?? " and he replied that kids generally don't have the urge control that teens and adults have. Many of my child's early compulsions involved risk or harm. The overarching compulsion was to do something, anything that would risk her getting hurt or my getting so angry that I would kill her (the obsession.) OCD told her it would get much worse if she didn't take these " dares " , so for a long while she was compelled to do just about anything she had ever been asked not to do, or warned not to do due to it being dangerous. She did things like dash into the street without pausing to look both ways (after years of being reliable in doing this), riding her bike with her eyes closed, touching or attempting to touch hot things such as a casserole dish right out of the oven, touch the sharp edge of a knife, unhook her seat belt while riding in the car, etc. etc. etc. Once I walked across the kitchen to get something from a cabinet that she had asked for, I turned around and just that quick she was right under my feet on the floor, she " had to " take the risk that I would step on her head and kill her. Getting the meds right helped immeasurably, and she also took a small dose of Risperdal to reduce the tics and urges, which it did very well. The ERP for this type of thing was to (using your example) have her sit at the table with the bottle of pills from the medicine cabinet, and resist taking them for increasing periods of time. Once that becomes easy (prompts little/no anxiety), then maybe the container with the pills is open, then maybe he pours them all in his hand. It goes without saying that all this is under close supervision (don't use pills that could really hurt him--perhaps skittles or similar in an empty prescription bottle would be close enough to trigger the anxiety he needs to acclimate to, without actually taking any risk that he could gulp medicine that could harm him.) If you think your son is having similar obsession as my child's (risk hurting yourself or angering your Mother or teacher, or else) you can also address the obsession itself by the type of exposures I've mentioned in other posts--writing out a detailed story where he does take the pills, gets very sick, is rushed to the hospital but it's too late, or drawing a picture, etc. etc. until the obsession fades. I think these types of obsessions and compulsions are fairly common in young kids, they strike at the heart of their main worries, that they are not safe after all, dangerous things are everywhere and maybe even Mom or Dad (big, invincible protectors) could hurt or kill, because we are so much bigger. Nonetheless (((hugs))) I remember also wishing my child would do something non-life-and-limb-threatening such as ordering or arranging for compulsions, rather than scaring the life out of me and risking actual harm. Please be certain his doctor knows he is doing compulsions that are dangerous, and/or unable to resist urges that could be harmful. A med adjustment may be in order, or perhaps the doctor will want to add a medication to tone down urge behaviors. Take care, Kathy R. in Indiana ----- Original Message ----- > Kathy: > I printed out the last few posts in reference to this subject. Thanks for your time in relaying your knowledge on it. There seems to be a litttle different development in his compulsions or, probably better stated, a " discovery " of his compulsions. He apparently actually responds and follows through with the obsessive thoughts-not the really bad ones. For desire not to actually state what it is, I'll give an example similar to what he's thinking. For example, if he had a thought that he really needed to take pills out of the medicine cabinet and take all of them, he will do it. Again, that's only an example. The reason I'm using this example is because some of the thoughts about an action he HAS TO DO are actually harmful/unacceptable, and he's DOING THEM! Ok, so now what. It's impossible to " blow off " things like that or deflate them, because following through with them are totally unacceptable. The last few days, it's not been life-threatening, but always things he ABSOLUTELY should not do. So what to do then? I used to think the obsessions were about his being afraid of doing something, but since he's acting on them now, there's got to have been a bridge made along the way. This disturbs me. Has your daughter or anyone on this list's children ever acted on the bad thought-I supposed it is similar to the hand-washing. " I have to wash my hands or else I'll get germs " , which of course other than reddened, chapped hands and eating time, can't really harm the child or anyone else. Boy, do I wish this was the type he had. Anyway, ideas? > in So IL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 20, 2004 Report Share Posted June 20, 2004 God bless you during this terribly difficult stretch! You're in my prayers. God bless you Kathy b/c you are so kind to encourage all of us in this battle! And you know soooooo much and are so willing to take the time to share your wisdom with humor and eloquence! cristey On Sun, 20 Jun 2004 20:36:16 -0500 " Kathy " writes: > Hi , I remember blasting into Kel's pdoc's office and saying " I > thought people with OCD didn't *do* the things they were obsessing > about!!!?? " and he replied that kids generally don't have the urge control that > teens and adults have. ________________________________________________________________ The best thing to hit the Internet in years - Juno SpeedBand! Surf the Web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER! Only $14.95/ month - visit www.juno.com to sign up today! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 Kathy, Thank you. I think a medication change is in order, too. I am printing out this e-mail to go along with all your recent replies that I've printed, so I have something to refer to when it gets confusing. You don't know how much I appreciate it. We're in the mode again where it's wearing me out. It's also weighing heavily on my heart and mind as that nagging thing that we wish we didn't have to deal with all the time, so direction right now is so appreciated. in Southern Illinois Re: To Kathy R. Hi , I remember blasting into Kel's pdoc's office and saying " I thought people with OCD didn't *do* the things they were obsessing about!!!?? " and he replied that kids generally don't have the urge control that teens and adults have. Many of my child's early compulsions involved risk or harm. The overarching compulsion was to do something, anything that would risk her getting hurt or my getting so angry that I would kill her (the obsession.) OCD told her it would get much worse if she didn't take these " dares " , so for a long while she was compelled to do just about anything she had ever been asked not to do, or warned not to do due to it being dangerous. She did things like dash into the street without pausing to look both ways (after years of being reliable in doing this), riding her bike with her eyes closed, touching or attempting to touch hot things such as a casserole dish right out of the oven, touch the sharp edge of a knife, unhook her seat belt while riding in the car, etc. etc. etc. Once I walked across the kitchen to get something from a cabinet that she had asked for, I turned around and just that quick she was right under my feet on the floor, she " had to " take the risk that I would step on her head and kill her. Getting the meds right helped immeasurably, and she also took a small dose of Risperdal to reduce the tics and urges, which it did very well. The ERP for this type of thing was to (using your example) have her sit at the table with the bottle of pills from the medicine cabinet, and resist taking them for increasing periods of time. Once that becomes easy (prompts little/no anxiety), then maybe the container with the pills is open, then maybe he pours them all in his hand. It goes without saying that all this is under close supervision (don't use pills that could really hurt him--perhaps skittles or similar in an empty prescription bottle would be close enough to trigger the anxiety he needs to acclimate to, without actually taking any risk that he could gulp medicine that could harm him.) If you think your son is having similar obsession as my child's (risk hurting yourself or angering your Mother or teacher, or else) you can also address the obsession itself by the type of exposures I've mentioned in other posts--writing out a detailed story where he does take the pills, gets very sick, is rushed to the hospital but it's too late, or drawing a picture, etc. etc. until the obsession fades. I think these types of obsessions and compulsions are fairly common in young kids, they strike at the heart of their main worries, that they are not safe after all, dangerous things are everywhere and maybe even Mom or Dad (big, invincible protectors) could hurt or kill, because we are so much bigger. Nonetheless (((hugs))) I remember also wishing my child would do something non-life-and-limb-threatening such as ordering or arranging for compulsions, rather than scaring the life out of me and risking actual harm. Please be certain his doctor knows he is doing compulsions that are dangerous, and/or unable to resist urges that could be harmful. A med adjustment may be in order, or perhaps the doctor will want to add a medication to tone down urge behaviors. Take care, Kathy R. in Indiana ----- Original Message ----- > Kathy: > I printed out the last few posts in reference to this subject. Thanks for your time in relaying your knowledge on it. There seems to be a litttle different development in his compulsions or, probably better stated, a " discovery " of his compulsions. He apparently actually responds and follows through with the obsessive thoughts-not the really bad ones. For desire not to actually state what it is, I'll give an example similar to what he's thinking. For example, if he had a thought that he really needed to take pills out of the medicine cabinet and take all of them, he will do it. Again, that's only an example. The reason I'm using this example is because some of the thoughts about an action he HAS TO DO are actually harmful/unacceptable, and he's DOING THEM! Ok, so now what. It's impossible to " blow off " things like that or deflate them, because following through with them are totally unacceptable. The last few days, it's not been life-threatening, but always things he ABSOLUTELY should not do. So what to do then? I used to think the obsessions were about his being afraid of doing something, but since he's acting on them now, there's got to have been a bridge made along the way. This disturbs me. Has your daughter or anyone on this list's children ever acted on the bad thought-I supposed it is similar to the hand-washing. " I have to wash my hands or else I'll get germs " , which of course other than reddened, chapped hands and eating time, can't really harm the child or anyone else. Boy, do I wish this was the type he had. Anyway, ideas? > in So IL Our list archives, bookmarks, files, and chat feature may be accessed at: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group// . Our list advisors are Gail B. , Ed.D., Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list moderators are Birkhan, Castle, Fowler, Kathy Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Gail Pesses, Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout. Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 21, 2004 Report Share Posted June 21, 2004 Cristey, Thank you-for the prayers, that is. Needing them badly right now as, I suppose, we all do....... Re: To Kathy R. God bless you during this terribly difficult stretch! You're in my prayers. God bless you Kathy b/c you are so kind to encourage all of us in this battle! And you know soooooo much and are so willing to take the time to share your wisdom with humor and eloquence! cristey On Sun, 20 Jun 2004 20:36:16 -0500 " Kathy " writes: > Hi , I remember blasting into Kel's pdoc's office and saying " I > thought people with OCD didn't *do* the things they were obsessing > about!!!?? " and he replied that kids generally don't have the urge control that > teens and adults have. ________________________________________________________________ The best thing to hit the Internet in years - Juno SpeedBand! Surf the Web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER! Only $14.95/ month - visit www.juno.com to sign up today! Our list archives, bookmarks, files, and chat feature may be accessed at: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group// . Our list advisors are Gail B. , Ed.D., Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list moderators are Birkhan, Castle, Fowler, Kathy Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Gail Pesses, Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout. Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 22, 2004 Report Share Posted June 22, 2004 ----- Original Message ----- > God bless you Kathy b/c you are so kind to encourage all of us in this > battle! And you know soooooo much and are so willing to take the time to > share your wisdom with humor and eloquence! *****Thank you Cristey, I'm glad to know you find the posts helpful. I spent a loooong while desperately hanging on the support of this group, generous folks who explained and suggested and generally held my hand. I credit those parents with dramatically shortening my child's path from onset to relief; because of their input I did not waste valuable time with the wrong doctors, therapies, or medications for her. So now it is my privilege to pass on what I've learned. If I seem to know so much about parenting a child with OCD, remember that a lot of it is knowledge freely given to me by more experienced parents back when this list was new. Take care, Kathy R. in Indiana Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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