Re: Doing the work on feelings

[Guest guest]

Dear Tami:

Excellent question!

You quoted as saying " stress is an alarm clock that tells us

that we are attaching to something that is not true for us. "

So if you are depressed, sad, etc. and that feeling is not a " happy "

one for you then what belief are you attaching to that is not true?

Here is an example:

" I am angry because I feel sad & depressed. "

Well obviously this is arguing with what is and it is an insane

belief.

The problem is that we have skipped one whole generation of

thinking.

Now we must discover and do The Work on the story that is making me

feel sad & depressed?

or

admit that the truth is that I merely have had a feeling and I have

decided to name it " sad & depressed " .

Believing the lie that my problem is that " I am sad & depressed " and

not determining what is behind those feelings is not going to work.

Problems must be healed at their source; otherwise we are only

treating the symptoms and I will, as you said, " settle with the

plaster " . :-)

Steve D.

> Hi

> I have this question that bothers me:

> says that suffering is an optional.

> stress is an alarm clock

> that tells us that we are attaching something that is not true for

us.

> reality = true.

> o.k.

>

> So, if I am upset because

> I have this " should " tought...

> I know what to do with that:

> It shouldn't rain

> turns to

> It should rain

>

> But

> How do I do the work on negative feelings

> such as depression, sadness, ext...

> Do I do it simply like that:

> I shouldn't feel sad, is that true?

> No! - if I feel sad

> Yes! - if I don't

> Or,

> I " need " to do the work on the toughts that caused

> the bad emotion.

> What does says about doing the work on emotions?

>

> For me

> the way I perceive it now:

> When I feel sad,

> I do the work on-

> You are not suppose to feel sad

> is that true?

> NO...

> It makes me feel a little better, not much

> I feel like it is a plaster, temporary solution.

>

> I know

> I am inquiring with a motive...

> My motive is to feel better,

> isn't what the work is all about?

> And if I don't feel better,

> I feel like I didn't do the work " right " ,

> so I settle with the plaster - that I am suppose to feel like

sheet!!!

> I am confused,

> Any suggestions?

[Guest guest]

It is me again

being more clear to myself

with my question.

I will refraze my question again:

>

> You quoted as saying " stress is an alarm clock that tells us

> that we are attaching to something that is not true for us. "

#####

mentioned stress...(is an alarm...)

What about:

sadness, depration.

Sadness is an alarm clock also?

or

sadness is just sadness?

the same goes to depration.

>

> " I am angry because I feel sad & depressed. "

>

I am not A-N-G-R-Y because I feel sad & depressed

I just feel deprassed.

Steve,

I am curious,

if I would ask you to facilitate me,

and I will say:

Steve, I am deprassed!!!

I would you go from there.

I know only 3 ways to do the work on that one:

1. Is it true that you are depressed?

2. Is it true that you shouldn't feel depressed?

3. You are depressed because_______

(and than ivestigate the tought that is behind the depressed)

What would you do with me?

What does in emotional issues?

>

> The problem is that we have skipped one whole generation of

> thinking.

> Now we must discover and do The Work on the story that is making me

> feel sad & depressed?

Option number 3 (wright?)

> or

> admit that the truth is that I merely have had a feeling and I have

> decided to name it " sad & depressed " .

What did you mean by that?

>

> Believing the lie that my problem is that " I am sad & depressed "

and

> not determining what is behind those feelings is not going to work.

> Problems must be healed at their source; otherwise we are only

> treating the symptoms and I will, as you said, " settle with the

> plaster " . :-)

Again, option nomber 3 (wright?)

>

> Steve D.

Thank you very much

I appritiate our friendship

Tami

[Guest guest]

Dear Tami,

what sounds comfortable to me is:

I should *never* feel sad - Is that true? Do I?

or

I should not feel sad *now* - Is that true? Does it look like I feel

sad, now?

And maybe: I am sad. - is that true? who told me to label it " sadness " ?

And how do I react when I think this thought? What if I could not name

it?

Where I go with it, is: If I believe the thought that I am sad, I feel

sad about that, or I tell myself over and over the story that I am sad.

And I notice, that when I feel sad, each whence in a while, my mind

wanders off. And it sounds like: Where was I? Oh yes, I was feeling

sad… about what? Oh, right. God, do I feel sad…

And you can also do the work on what caused the emotion.

says, if you feel sad, and think you shouldn't, you feel sad on

top of feeling sad. And if you don't inquire, you may feel sad about

that, too.

And the work is not about feeling better - it is about realizing what

you thought was true, isn't.

Love,

Am 09.08.2004 um 21:15 schrieb Tami:

> Hi

> I have this question that bothers me:

> says that suffering is an optional.

> stress is an alarm clock

> that tells us that we are attaching something that is not true for us.

> reality = true.

> o.k.

>

> So, if I am upset because

> I have this " should " tought...

> I know what to do with that:

> It shouldn't rain

> turns to

> It should rain

>

> But

> How do I do the work on negative feelings

> such as depression, sadness, ext...

> Do I do it simply like that:

> I shouldn't feel sad, is that true?

> No! - if I feel sad

> Yes! - if I don't

> Or,

> I " need " to do the work on the toughts that caused

> the bad emotion.

> What does says about doing the work on emotions?

>

> For me

> the way I perceive it now:

> When I feel sad,

> I do the work on-

> You are not suppose to feel sad

> is that true?

> NO...

> It makes me feel a little better, not much

> I feel like it is a plaster, temporary solution.

>

> I know

> I am inquiring with a motive...

> My motive is to feel better,

> isn't what the work is all about?

> And if I don't feel better,

> I feel like I didn't do the work " right " ,

> so I settle with the plaster - that I am suppose to feel like sheet!!!

> I am confused,

> Any suggestions?

[Guest guest]

Dear Tami,

So, you could just feel depressed and hve no underlying thoughts of

anger or guilt that are causing those feeling of being depressed?

Then I suggest doing The Work on Mother, Father, Sister, Brother,

Boss, Lover, Friend, etc., etc. and see what comes up.

You said:

" ,I am curious, if I would ask you to facilitate me, and I will say:

Steve, I am deprassed!!!

I would you go from there.

I know only 3 ways to do the work on that one:

1. Is it true that you are depressed?

I agree that is a good way to go. Are you depressed when you

asleep?

2. Is it true that you shouldn't feel depressed?

This is also a good one. Arguing with What Is.

3. You are depressed because_______

(and than ivestigate the tought that is behind the depressed)

There are always thoughts that arise that bring on the depression.

Depression is a " feeling " which is #2 in the 4 steps of creation.

What would you do with me?

I would first try your #1 " Is it true that you are depressed? "

And in question #3 you would find what it does to you to believe that

thought.

I would add a Sub #3a of " Can you see a reason to drop that thought --

and I am not asking you to drop it (because you would if you

could!)? "

And Sub #3b " Can you find one peaceful reason to keep that thought? "

And in question #4 you would find who you would be without that

belief.

And then we would turn it around to " I am not depressed. "

And pehaps you would find that to be just as true or truer. Let's

look at the amount of time each day that you are experiencing

depression and how much time you are not experiencing depression. I

bet that it is not 100% of 24 hours each day.

You said: " What does in emotional issues? "

I do not see a set pattern for what does in any situation

except that she uses the 4 questions and a turnaround.

Love, Steve

> It is me again

> being more clear to myself

> with my question.

>

> I will refraze my question again:

> >

> > You quoted as saying " stress is an alarm clock that tells

us

> > that we are attaching to something that is not true for us. "

>

> #####

> mentioned stress...(is an alarm...)

> What about:

> sadness, depration.

> Sadness is an alarm clock also?

> or

> sadness is just sadness?

>

> the same goes to depration.

>

>

> >

> > " I am angry because I feel sad & depressed. "

> >

>

> I am not A-N-G-R-Y because I feel sad & depressed

> I just feel deprassed.

>

> Steve,

> I am curious,

> if I would ask you to facilitate me,

> and I will say:

> Steve, I am deprassed!!!

>

> I would you go from there.

>

> I know only 3 ways to do the work on that one:

> 1. Is it true that you are depressed?

> 2. Is it true that you shouldn't feel depressed?

> 3. You are depressed because_______

> (and than ivestigate the tought that is behind the depressed)

>

> What would you do with me?

> What does in emotional issues?

>

> >

> > The problem is that we have skipped one whole generation of

> > thinking.

> > Now we must discover and do The Work on the story that is making

me

> > feel sad & depressed?

>

> Option number 3 (wright?)

>

> > or

> > admit that the truth is that I merely have had a feeling and I

have

> > decided to name it " sad & depressed " .

>

> What did you mean by that?

>

> >

> > Believing the lie that my problem is that " I am sad & depressed "

> and

> > not determining what is behind those feelings is not going to

work.

> > Problems must be healed at their source; otherwise we are only

> > treating the symptoms and I will, as you said, " settle with the

> > plaster " . :-)

>

> Again, option nomber 3 (wright?)

> >

> > Steve D.

>

> Thank you very much

> I appritiate our friendship

>

> Tami

[Guest guest]

Hi Steve

>

Thank you :-)

I wrote:

> I know only 3 ways to do the work on that one:

> 1. Is it true that you are depressed?

For me the first one sounded " unnecessary "

because, obviously,

If I calim to be depressed -

why bothering asking this question:

Is it true that you are depressed?

What I have learn from your response:

> I agree that is a good way to go. Are you depressed when you

> asleep?

Is that even when I am depressed,

I am not all the time depressed.

In fact I can be depressed only 10 minutes,

but since being depressed scares me

(I need to invasigate on:

You are depressed and it means that... I lost my way)

I forget that two moment ago I wasnt depressed

I know that this feeling wouldn't last forever

but yet, my all being becauses depressed.

I can be 10 minutes happy

and forget it very fast

I can be 10 depressed

and it stain my all day.

So I see your point

But then

When I claim that I am depressed

I mean that I am depressed now!!!

sure I wasn't depressed when I was asleep.

So, my answer to questions 1,2 (is it true?)

might be YYYYEEEEESSSS

How will you move on?

I read what you wrote:

> And in question #3 you would find what it does to you to believe

that

> thought.

> I would add a Sub #3a of " Can you see a reason to drop that

thought --

> and I am not asking you to drop it (because you would if you

> could!)? "

> And Sub #3b " Can you find one peaceful reason to keep that thought? "

> And in question #4 you would find who you would be without that

> belief.

I will write new message on that one.

Thank you