Guest guest Posted April 3, 2004 Report Share Posted April 3, 2004 Hi yall - howdy from seaside, OR. I've been enjoying the work I'm reading here. I didn't know KT had a face lift but that's cool. certainly brings up some should and shouldn't stories... I left bullfrog, Utah in January, moved to Oregon, and am doing my best to adjust. I'm still homesick for my beloved bullfrog. and yes, I just like saying the word bullfrog. hee, hee... but, the universe gave me an opportunity for change and I took it. It is so incredible to be living by the ocean - I'm amazed, and beautiful Margaret is in Lake Oswego. anyhoo, the current story I'm running is of a boyfriend who is Catholic and pissing me off because he does not consider my metaphysical lifestyle a real religion. He told me I don't have a religion because I don't go to church. I really thought I had gotten to the point with the work where I didn't care what other people thought about my religion...but Then he makes some nasty jibe about my lack of religion and whee...here I go....on another temper tantrum joyride...I'm so annoyed with his religious intolerance. Yeah, its time to find out whets really not true. d should not say I have no religion Is it true? Yes dammit, he should notice how spiritual I am He should notice my entire life is my religion - my church He should see I'm starting to sprout wings He should see the divinity in me He should notice how spiritual you are? Is that true? Yes dammit - I just ooze spirituality in everything I do Is that true? Well I like to think I do... But I guess I can't know if that's true... D should not say you have no religion? No, he shouldn't be so judgmental But T, judging others is what we do best It is natural Ok, D should judge me, but he should correct himself before concluding I have no religion You know what D should do? What he should think? What corrections he needs to make? No...I just know what I want him to think... I want D to think I am spiritual That's truer... How do you react when you get angry about D saying You have no religion? It really pisses me off - my reaction is anything but spiritual - I feel like I have something to prove I want to bust his chops - I feel like I'm being excluded from some kind of exclusive God club T, you no longer attend an organized religion but you used to do so. Back then, if you had looked at you, you also would have said you have no religion... Yeah...I can find that... So his comment that you have no religion is his story of religion - it doesn't have anything to do with you... So why the angry reaction? Ok, I can get a sense that whatever I'm pissed about isn't about him...once again, its not about the other persons story...he can say i have no religion and I can choose to be upset - or I can choose to feel no reaction to his story How do you treat him when you believe that D should not say you have no religion? I freaked...I refused to stay in the same room with him I called him lots of names...I haven't been nice in 2 days. I demanded an apology...I threatened to end the relationship... geesh...none of this stuff was very spiritual behavior. No wonder he doesn't think I have a religion... D should not have said I have no religion... Can I think of a peaceful reason to keep running this story? It is very stressful - my behavior around it has been very defensive...and I'm reinforcing how UNspiritual I can be in the face of something that makes me mad... What does it matter what D thinks about you? What does it matter if D thinks you have no religion? Why such a fearful reaction? The thought that is coming is...he might be right. Man...waves and waves of pain I really want to rebel against the thought he might be right. Lets just play it for a minute - relax and let go of your defenses and be on the edge for minute...would it be so bad if you had no religion? Well...let's hear the thought Tabrina has no religion I'm getting lots of BUTS But...I am religious - I do believe in God But...I am a good person - I do live my life according to a principle... But...I do attend church - my entire life everyday is my church But...I don't want God to forget about me - if I have no religion he might not notice me Is that true? God might forget you? Yeah, I feel like I'm on a deserted island ...trying to light a signal fire so God won't forget me..It was like D told me the fire is out. So your panic is about God, not what D thinks... Yeah... God won't notice you unless you have a religion? Is it true? Hmm...No, Gosh...Maybe...I won't stick out. I won't have a thumbtack representing me on his " spiritual people chart " God has a chart? Is it true? Umm...I can't know that but I believe it I can feel the stress that arises when I think I'm not on the chart... T, this story is completely fabricated by you I need God to notice me Is that true? absolutely. yes, yes, yes. otherwise, this life, everything I have lived through has been for nothing. NOTHING alot of anger here... Ok...let's play with this. Remember we can play with our fearful thoughts - that is what is so nice about the work... what if...what if it all was for nothing? Wow. I just feel my heaving...my hands are clenching...my heart is jumping...I want to cry - I want to throw myself off a ledge - I want to scream...a sensation of falling ook ook ook Its all for nothing. a black, black void Its all for nothing. Is that true? That's my fear but I can't know if it's true It is driving me crazy. I can't know if it's true or not I want to fight like crazy to convince myself there is something. I want to pound on god's chest - notice me, notice me, notice me.... You want to make God do something? boy, that really sounds hopeless lol...yeah it does... like hoping king kong will pick me up and fall in love with me... waiting on that island for something to happen that may never happen God should notice me Is it true? yes Is it REALLY true? Yes - I want special attention from God I deserve it You deserve SPECIAL attention from God? Yes Is it really true? YES, dammit How do you feel when you believe this story? I act crazy. I feel frenzied. my thoughts are just running around like chickens without heads... is there a peaceful reason to keep this story? no, but the alternative seems very, very empty... nothing for nothing how do you know God isn't giving you special attention? well I was ok with not thinking about it either way until D stated that in his opinion, I have no religion. I felt like I had been caught naked without a label. I felt frightened that God wouldn't find me and I'd be stuck in the dark without a flashlight. Is it true? God won't find you? I don't know Can you make God do anything? No How about just working with you for now and leave God up to God ok... Do some turnarounds... God should notice me I should notice God - yes I should notice me - yes I have no religion I do have a religion I do have a religion - my religion is no religion... lol..truer...thats really funny - I could have said that to D instead - D should say I have no religion D should say I have no religion I should say I have no religion Practice that - how does it feel? I have no religion I have no religion I have no religion Like being on a tightrope without a net An awful feeling - well not all of it Some of it feels exhilarating... Like I'm really alive - really risking it Take it as far as you can take it... I am willing to have no religion Yes...that is true... I look forward to having no religion YES, who needs more dumb stories? I am willing for D to say I have no religion Still some resistance...why? I want D to think I am just as religious as he is Why? What will you get for it? I can't think of anything I would get for it. If I can't influence God, surely D can't either. If D doesn't think I am spiritual, does that mean I'm not spiritual? No, it just means he has his own story running... I'm over here doing my spiritual thing I don't need his approval. I want his approval. Is that true? no. no, that's really not true. there have been many times when I have deliberately paraded my " lack of religious activity " in his face... Oh that's really true...when you think of it that way is it suprising he had a story about it? no, not at all he may have some fear too... he has always been Catholic and now he is seeing a woman who doesn't share his religious background, his belief systems... his entire story could very well have been about his fears... Wow - I feel so much better so much more relaxed. I look forward to D saying I have no religion... Yes, I can own this... It certainly slam dunked me back into the work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 3, 2004 Report Share Posted April 3, 2004 wow, that was fun! Tabekat wrote:Hi yall - howdy from seaside, OR. I've been enjoying the work I'm reading here. I didn't know KT had a face lift but that's cool. certainly brings up some should and shouldn't stories... I left bullfrog, Utah in January, moved to Oregon, and am doing my best to adjust. I'm still homesick for my beloved bullfrog. and yes, I just like saying the word bullfrog. hee, hee... but, the universe gave me an opportunity for change and I took it. It is so incredible to be living by the ocean - I'm amazed, and beautiful Margaret is in Lake Oswego. anyhoo, the current story I'm running is of a boyfriend who is Catholic and pissing me off because he does not consider my metaphysical lifestyle a real religion. He told me I don't have a religion because I don't go to church. I really thought I had gotten to the point with the work where I didn't care what other people thought about my religion...but Then he makes some nasty jibe about my lack of religion and whee...here I go....on another temper tantrum joyride...I'm so annoyed with his religious intolerance. Yeah, its time to find out whets really not true. d should not say I have no religion Is it true? Yes dammit, he should notice how spiritual I am He should notice my entire life is my religion - my church He should see I'm starting to sprout wings He should see the divinity in me He should notice how spiritual you are? Is that true? Yes dammit - I just ooze spirituality in everything I do Is that true? Well I like to think I do... But I guess I can't know if that's true... D should not say you have no religion? No, he shouldn't be so judgmental But T, judging others is what we do best It is natural Ok, D should judge me, but he should correct himself before concluding I have no religion You know what D should do? What he should think? What corrections he needs to make? No...I just know what I want him to think... I want D to think I am spiritual That's truer... How do you react when you get angry about D saying You have no religion? It really pisses me off - my reaction is anything but spiritual - I feel like I have something to prove I want to bust his chops - I feel like I'm being excluded from some kind of exclusive God club T, you no longer attend an organized religion but you used to do so. Back then, if you had looked at you, you also would have said you have no religion... Yeah...I can find that... So his comment that you have no religion is his story of religion - it doesn't have anything to do with you... So why the angry reaction? Ok, I can get a sense that whatever I'm pissed about isn't about him...once again, its not about the other persons story...he can say i have no religion and I can choose to be upset - or I can choose to feel no reaction to his story How do you treat him when you believe that D should not say you have no religion? I freaked...I refused to stay in the same room with him I called him lots of names...I haven't been nice in 2 days. I demanded an apology...I threatened to end the relationship... geesh...none of this stuff was very spiritual behavior. No wonder he doesn't think I have a religion... D should not have said I have no religion... Can I think of a peaceful reason to keep running this story? It is very stressful - my behavior around it has been very defensive...and I'm reinforcing how UNspiritual I can be in the face of something that makes me mad... What does it matter what D thinks about you? What does it matter if D thinks you have no religion? Why such a fearful reaction? The thought that is coming is...he might be right. Man...waves and waves of pain I really want to rebel against the thought he might be right. Lets just play it for a minute - relax and let go of your defenses and be on the edge for minute...would it be so bad if you had no religion? Well...let's hear the thought Tabrina has no religion I'm getting lots of BUTS But...I am religious - I do believe in God But...I am a good person - I do live my life according to a principle... But...I do attend church - my entire life everyday is my church But...I don't want God to forget about me - if I have no religion he might not notice me Is that true? God might forget you? Yeah, I feel like I'm on a deserted island ...trying to light a signal fire so God won't forget me..It was like D told me the fire is out. So your panic is about God, not what D thinks... Yeah... God won't notice you unless you have a religion? Is it true? Hmm...No, Gosh...Maybe...I won't stick out. I won't have a thumbtack representing me on his " spiritual people chart " God has a chart? Is it true? Umm...I can't know that but I believe it I can feel the stress that arises when I think I'm not on the chart... T, this story is completely fabricated by you I need God to notice me Is that true? absolutely. yes, yes, yes. otherwise, this life, everything I have lived through has been for nothing. NOTHING alot of anger here... Ok...let's play with this. Remember we can play with our fearful thoughts - that is what is so nice about the work... what if...what if it all was for nothing? Wow. I just feel my heaving...my hands are clenching...my heart is jumping...I want to cry - I want to throw myself off a ledge - I want to scream...a sensation of falling ook ook ook Its all for nothing. a black, black void Its all for nothing. Is that true? That's my fear but I can't know if it's true It is driving me crazy. I can't know if it's true or not I want to fight like crazy to convince myself there is something. I want to pound on god's chest - notice me, notice me, notice me.... You want to make God do something? boy, that really sounds hopeless lol...yeah it does... like hoping king kong will pick me up and fall in love with me... waiting on that island for something to happen that may never happen God should notice me Is it true? yes Is it REALLY true? Yes - I want special attention from God I deserve it You deserve SPECIAL attention from God? Yes Is it really true? YES, dammit How do you feel when you believe this story? I act crazy. I feel frenzied. my thoughts are just running around like chickens without heads... is there a peaceful reason to keep this story? no, but the alternative seems very, very empty... nothing for nothing how do you know God isn't giving you special attention? well I was ok with not thinking about it either way until D stated that in his opinion, I have no religion. I felt like I had been caught naked without a label. I felt frightened that God wouldn't find me and I'd be stuck in the dark without a flashlight. Is it true? God won't find you? I don't know Can you make God do anything? No How about just working with you for now and leave God up to God ok... Do some turnarounds... God should notice me I should notice God - yes I should notice me - yes I have no religion I do have a religion I do have a religion - my religion is no religion... lol..truer...thats really funny - I could have said that to D instead - D should say I have no religion D should say I have no religion I should say I have no religion Practice that - how does it feel? I have no religion I have no religion I have no religion Like being on a tightrope without a net An awful feeling - well not all of it Some of it feels exhilarating... Like I'm really alive - really risking it Take it as far as you can take it... I am willing to have no religion Yes...that is true... I look forward to having no religion YES, who needs more dumb stories? I am willing for D to say I have no religion Still some resistance...why? I want D to think I am just as religious as he is Why? What will you get for it? I can't think of anything I would get for it. If I can't influence God, surely D can't either. If D doesn't think I am spiritual, does that mean I'm not spiritual? No, it just means he has his own story running... I'm over here doing my spiritual thing I don't need his approval. I want his approval. Is that true? no. no, that's really not true. there have been many times when I have deliberately paraded my " lack of religious activity " in his face... Oh that's really true...when you think of it that way is it suprising he had a story about it? no, not at all he may have some fear too... he has always been Catholic and now he is seeing a woman who doesn't share his religious background, his belief systems... his entire story could very well have been about his fears... Wow - I feel so much better so much more relaxed. I look forward to D saying I have no religion... Yes, I can own this... It certainly slam dunked me back into the work --------------------------------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 3, 2004 Report Share Posted April 3, 2004 tabrina, thanks for posting that. i like the way you Work. very flowing and organic feeling and i'd like to get there myself sometime, so i look forward to reading more... warmly, susan > Hi yall - howdy from seaside, OR. I've been enjoying the work I'm > reading here. I didn't know KT had a face lift but that's cool. > certainly brings up some should and shouldn't stories... > > I left bullfrog, Utah in January, moved to Oregon, and am doing my > best to adjust. I'm still homesick for my beloved bullfrog. and > yes, I just like saying the word bullfrog. hee, hee... > > but, the universe gave me an opportunity for change and I took it. > It is so incredible to be living by the ocean - I'm amazed, and > beautiful Margaret is in Lake Oswego. > > anyhoo, the current story I'm running is of a boyfriend who is > Catholic and pissing me off because he does not consider my > metaphysical lifestyle a real religion. He told me I don't have a > religion because I don't go to church. > > I really thought I had gotten to the point with the work where I > didn't care what other people thought about my religion...but > Then he makes some nasty jibe about my lack of religion and > whee...here I go....on another temper tantrum joyride...I'm so > annoyed with his religious intolerance. Yeah, its time to > find out whets really not true. > > d should not say I have no religion > > Is it true? > > Yes dammit, he should notice how spiritual I am > He should notice my entire life is my religion - my church > He should see I'm starting to sprout wings > He should see the divinity in me > > He should notice how spiritual you are? > Is that true? > > Yes dammit - I just ooze spirituality in everything I do > > Is that true? > > Well I like to think I do... > But I guess I can't know if that's true... > > D should not say you have no religion? > > No, he shouldn't be so judgmental > > But T, judging others is what we do best > It is natural > > Ok, D should judge me, but he should correct himself > before concluding I have no religion > > You know what D should do? What he should think? > What corrections he needs to make? > > No...I just know what I want him to think... > I want D to think I am spiritual > That's truer... > > How do you react when you get angry about D saying > You have no religion? > > It really pisses me off - my reaction is anything but > spiritual - I feel like I have something to prove > I want to bust his chops - I feel like I'm being > excluded from some kind of exclusive God club > > T, you no longer attend an organized religion but > you used to do so. Back then, if you had looked > at you, you also would have said you have no religion... > > Yeah...I can find that... > > So his comment that you have no religion is his story > of religion - it doesn't have anything to do with you... > So why the angry reaction? > > Ok, I can get a sense that whatever I'm pissed about > isn't about him...once again, its not about the > other persons story...he can say i have no religion > and I can choose to be upset - or I can choose to feel > no reaction to his story > > How do you treat him when you believe that D should not > say you have no religion? > > I freaked...I refused to stay in the same room with him > I called him lots of names...I haven't been nice in 2 days. > I demanded an apology...I threatened to end the relationship... > > geesh...none of this stuff was very spiritual behavior. > No wonder he doesn't think I have a religion... > > D should not have said I have no religion... > > Can I think of a peaceful reason to keep running this story? > > It is very stressful - my behavior around it has been > very defensive...and I'm reinforcing how UNspiritual I > can be in the face of something that makes me mad... > > What does it matter what D thinks about you? > What does it matter if D thinks you have no religion? > Why such a fearful reaction? > > The thought that is coming is...he might be right. > > Man...waves and waves of pain > I really want to rebel against the thought he might be right. > > Lets just play it for a minute - relax and let go of your > defenses and be on the edge for minute...would it be > so bad if you had no religion? > > Well...let's hear the thought > > Tabrina has no religion > > I'm getting lots of BUTS > > But...I am religious - I do believe in God > But...I am a good person - I do live my life according > to a principle... > But...I do attend church - my entire life everyday is my church > But...I don't want God to forget about me - if I have no religion > he might not notice me > > Is that true? God might forget you? > > Yeah, I feel like I'm on a deserted island ...trying to light a > signal fire so God won't forget me..It was like D told me the > fire is out. > > So your panic is about God, not what D thinks... > > Yeah... > > God won't notice you unless you have a religion? > > Is it true? > > Hmm...No, Gosh...Maybe...I won't stick out. I won't > have a thumbtack representing me on his " spiritual > people chart " > > God has a chart? Is it true? > > Umm...I can't know that but I believe it > I can feel the stress that arises when I think I'm not > on the chart... > > T, this story is completely fabricated by you > > I need God to notice me > > Is that true? > > absolutely. yes, yes, yes. otherwise, this life, > everything I have lived through has been for nothing. > NOTHING > > alot of anger here... > > Ok...let's play with this. Remember we can play with > our fearful thoughts - that is what is so nice about the > work... > > what if...what if it all was > for nothing? > > Wow. I just feel my heaving...my hands are clenching...my heart is > jumping...I want to cry - I want to throw myself off > a ledge - I want to scream...a sensation of falling > > ook ook ook > > Its all for nothing. > > a black, black void > > Its all for nothing. Is that true? > > That's my fear but I can't know if it's true > > It is driving me crazy. I can't know if it's true or not > I want to fight like crazy to convince myself there > is something. I want to pound on god's chest - notice me, > notice me, notice me.... > > You want to make God do something? boy, that really > sounds hopeless > > lol...yeah it does... > like hoping king kong will pick me up and fall in love with me... > waiting on that island for something to happen that may never > happen > > God should notice me > > Is it true? > > yes > > Is it REALLY true? > > Yes - I want special attention from God > I deserve it > > You deserve SPECIAL attention from God? > > Yes > > Is it really true? > > YES, dammit > > How do you feel when you believe this story? > > I act crazy. I feel frenzied. my thoughts are > just running around like chickens without heads... > > is there a peaceful reason to keep this story? > > no, but the alternative seems very, very empty... > nothing for nothing > > how do you know God isn't giving you special attention? > > well I was ok with not thinking about it either way until > D stated that in his opinion, I have no religion. > > I felt like I had been caught naked without a label. > I felt frightened that God wouldn't find me and I'd > be stuck in the dark without a flashlight. > > Is it true? God won't find you? > > I don't know > > Can you make God do anything? > > No > > How about just working with you for now and leave > God up to God > > ok... > > Do some turnarounds... > > God should notice me > > I should notice God - yes > I should notice me - yes > > > I have no religion > I do have a religion > > I do have a religion - my religion is no religion... > lol..truer...thats really funny - I could have said that to D > instead - > > D should say I have no religion > > D should say I have no religion > I should say I have no religion > > Practice that - how does it feel? > > I have no religion > I have no religion > I have no religion > > Like being on a tightrope without a net > An awful feeling - well not all of it > Some of it feels exhilarating... > Like I'm really alive - really risking it > > Take it as far as you can take it... > > I am willing to have no religion > > Yes...that is true... > > I look forward to having no religion > > YES, who needs more dumb stories? > > I am willing for D to say I have no religion > > Still some resistance...why? > > I want D to think I am just as religious as he is > > Why? What will you get for it? > > I can't think of anything I would get for it. > If I can't influence God, surely D can't either. > > If D doesn't think I am spiritual, does that mean I'm not spiritual? > > No, it just means he has his own story running... > I'm over here doing my spiritual thing > I don't need his approval. > > I want his approval. > > Is that true? > > no. no, that's really not true. there have been many times > when I have deliberately paraded my " lack of religious > activity " in his face... > > Oh that's really true...when you think of it that way is it > suprising he had a story about it? > > no, not at all > > he may have some fear too... > he has always been Catholic and now he is seeing a > woman who doesn't share his religious background, > his belief systems... > > his entire story could very well have been about > his fears... > > Wow - I feel so much better > so much more relaxed. > > I look forward to D saying I have no religion... > > Yes, I can own this... > It certainly slam dunked me back into the work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 3, 2004 Report Share Posted April 3, 2004 > Hi yall - howdy from seaside, OR. I've been enjoying the work I'm > reading here. I didn't know KT had a face lift but that's cool. > certainly brings up some should and shouldn't stories... > Wow , Tabrina...I always LOVE to read your work. Blow a kiss to the ocean for me.... I love you, nne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.