Re: Righteous Anger! (Doreen)

[Guest guest]

>

> I absolutely love your story. I have such empathy for you. I have

done the same thing myself. I know EXACTLY how you feel/felt so don't

be put off by my sense of humor around it. The fact that I can now

view it with humour means to me that I have found some freedom from

similiar incidents (and there were many). So take heart girl. There

is hope!!

>

Hi Doreen,

Shall we play! LOL ...

" I know EXACTLY how you feel/felt " Is that really true?

My story is that I could not possibly know what anyone feels. I can

only KNOW my story, about what was written and how that made me feel.

" I have such empathy for you " . Empathy is not possible in my world. I

can not feel what someone else feels. I can only feel the results of

my own THINKING and tell the story that someone else is feeling the

same thing.

If someone has their leg chopped off I can not feel their pain. I can

only feel the pain of my unexamined stories I have about missing a

leg. " Empathy " is really a total waste of energy, rather than making

myself miserable with my stories I could actually do something to

help them, like buying a copy of " Loving What Is " for them to read.

LOL ... they might even realize that having one leg is perfect!

Just some thoughts

Loving what is, angel, and that would be you.

Neo

[Guest guest]

Yes Neo, we could play with this forever. LOL. I write a story about how I

feel, you say it is a story, I say your story of me telling a story is a

story.......oh boy...............

I agree with what you say. But it is hard to express how one " feels " for

someone's stories. For me I write in terms of how I think my words can be

understood (by me of course!!!).

I sometimes think myself into silence..........

What fun.....

Doreen

Re: Righteous Anger! (Doreen)

>

> I absolutely love your story. I have such empathy for you. I have

done the same thing myself. I know EXACTLY how you feel/felt so don't

be put off by my sense of humor around it. The fact that I can now

view it with humour means to me that I have found some freedom from

similiar incidents (and there were many). So take heart girl. There

is hope!!

>

Hi Doreen,

Shall we play! LOL ...

" I know EXACTLY how you feel/felt " Is that really true?

My story is that I could not possibly know what anyone feels. I can

only KNOW my story, about what was written and how that made me feel.

" I have such empathy for you " . Empathy is not possible in my world. I

can not feel what someone else feels. I can only feel the results of

my own THINKING and tell the story that someone else is feeling the

same thing.

If someone has their leg chopped off I can not feel their pain. I can

only feel the pain of my unexamined stories I have about missing a

leg. " Empathy " is really a total waste of energy, rather than making

myself miserable with my stories I could actually do something to

help them, like buying a copy of " Loving What Is " for them to read.

LOL ... they might even realize that having one leg is perfect!

Just some thoughts

Loving what is, angel, and that would be you.

Neo

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Neo wrote:

" It is not possible to hurt another human being.

No one can hurt

me. That's my job. So I know I can't hurt you. I

slap you, you do

the rest. But if I have the thought, if I slap you,

it would hurt

you, I have to stop. It goes beyond my normal

boundaries, my

evolution. If I don't stop, I self-inflict my own

pain. " BK.

Hmmm....well, my story and experience of watching this happen in the external

world, when parents publicly slap their children hard, is that they howl (as

does

the dog when beaten, or a baby when dropped). Did they have a 'story' about

they

couldn't be hurt if someone else inflicted it ? Dogs, or rather puppies and

babies

can't be running stories ... they're new to this experience. So what's the

deal?

While I can see the 'psychological' aspect (you can't hurt me; I do that) with

verbal

abuse, I have not made the leap into 'denial' of physical pain - can someone

enlighten me how I do this ? And can I put this to the test Neo ~ can I come

and

slap you ? (LOL).

Also you wrote ~

" I have such empathy for you " . Empathy is not possible in

my world. I

can not feel what someone else feels. I can only

feel the results of

my own THINKING and tell the story that someone

else is feeling

the

same thing.

Empathy comes from being in touch with the sense 'we are all one' .... so you

would feel or THINK you would feel another's pain then .... wouldn't you ?

There

are examples on tape of your Kt showing 'empathy' ~ only perhaps you call it

something different, like 'sympathy' ? (I sincerely hope not, as sympathy can

be

patronising, whereas empathy never is.) Be interested to know why what you call

your 'connection' with others ...

regards, Barbara

> >

> > I absolutely love your story. I have such empathy for you. I have

> done the same thing myself. I know EXACTLY how you feel/felt so don't

> be put off by my sense of humor around it. The fact that I can now

> view it with humour means to me that I have found some freedom from

> similiar incidents (and there were many). So take heart girl. There

> is hope!!

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> " I have such empathy for you " . Empathy is not possible in my world. I

> can not feel what someone else feels. I can only feel the results of

> my own THINKING and tell the story that someone else is feeling the

> same thing.

>

> If someone has their leg chopped off I can not feel their pain. I can

> only feel the pain of my unexamined stories I have about missing a

> leg. " Empathy " is really a total waste of energy, rather than making

> myself miserable with my stories I could actually do something to

> help them, like buying a copy of " Loving What Is " for them to read.

> LOL ... they might even realize that having one leg is perfect!

> Neo

Dear Neo,

I really like what you wrote and it also has some charge for me...I

have been empathetic to others, especially those loved ones who are

depressed. And as a counselor I can also see right into someone's

*dark material* and be very clear about their stuff. But even if I am

right about them and how messed up they are (smile) I'm wrong and

messed up, because I'm wrong minded....I'm not seeing the *real*

person....this is so good for me to see about myself. Boy, this really

brings up issues about counseling for me...

Thank you for bringing this up so that I can look at it again...

love,

nne

[Guest guest]

> I hafta jump in here.

>

> I hear your story and I think you are saying there is no such thing

> as empathy. But.......you also say " humans can only feel the pain

> of the story they are believing about someone elses pain. " Damn,

> thats' my empathy!!!

>

> I keep thinking we are all saying the same thing but making stories

> about it so we give it a twist to make it " special " to us.

>

Hey Doreen,

Maybe it might help to hear 's story about empathy? You can hear

it on CD 2 of the new CD/tape set on addictions. She does the Work

with a father and his daughter who is a heroine addict. Powerful

stuff. LOL ... Toward the end of the second CD the father gets to

learn that there is no such thing as empathy. Might be worth

purchasing the CD set if you are interested.

Loving what is, sweetheart, and that would be you.

Neo