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> Agree with you on getting males to open up,

> it is just not natural for us.

Doug, the roles are reversed here. I open up and she doesn't. She

says I talk too much, but if I am silent for however long - minutes,

hours, or days - it is total silence. It was the same with my first

wife. I guess I didn't learn.

- Dan

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LOL I found this reference to Iron amusing. My mother bought it for my

husband shortly after we were married as she felt my mother in law was too

controlling in our lives and he needed to break away. This was about 4

years before my husband, daughter and I moved in with my mother in law for a

year while we were looking for a home near them. One of my mother's major

gripes is that all of us have chosen to live in the hometown of our spouses

near their in laws.

Now that I think about it, I don't think it's that amusing just one more

attempt by her to show she could see clearly what others couldn't

d

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Doug,

I have Bly's " Iron " and I have read it several times.

The connection between my BIID problem and the prince's leg wound is

striking.

I have not had an Iron character in my life. Thinking about

that, I have a very strong reason not to divorce my wife. Her son is

15 years old. He is polite to me, but distant. He observes the

problems between me and my wife and sometimes expresses support for

me, like when my wife says she is doing nothing wrong.

I think even if things are rough between me and my wife, my stepson

needs me. I have to balance that with my fear of falling back into

uncontrollable BIID. If I self-destruct it won't help my stepson.

- Dan

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Dan that is brave and generous of heart. - j

Dan wrote:

Doug,

I have Bly's " Iron " and I have read it several times.

The connection between my BIID problem and the prince's leg wound is

striking.

I have not had an Iron character in my life. Thinking about

that, I have a very strong reason not to divorce my wife. Her son is

15 years old. He is polite to me, but distant. He observes the

problems between me and my wife and sometimes expresses support for

me, like when my wife says she is doing nothing wrong.

I think even if things are rough between me and my wife, my stepson

needs me. I have to balance that with my fear of falling back into

uncontrollable BIID. If I self-destruct it won't help my stepson.

- Dan

Send questions and/or concerns to ModOasis-owner

" Stop Walking on Eggshells, " a primer for non-BPs, can be ordered via

1-888-35-SHELL () and for the table of contents, go to:

http://www.BPDCentral.com

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