Re: 13.5 hours and counting...

[Guest guest]

GOOD LUCK !!

Jackie

> Tomorrow (in 13.5 hours)I have therapy #3 with Nada. I am doing much

> better this time with the pre-appointment 24 hour anxiety attack. I

> know my heart-rate will increase considerably tomorrow before the

> appointment and my head will pound for hours afterward, but I am glad

> to see a little improvement in myself.

>

> My goals tomorrow.

> 1. To love myself, my opinions, and my values very, very much. I

> just read this in SWOE Workbook and it is so true! " When our sense of

> obligation is greater than our sense of self-respect and self-caring,

> (emotional) blackmailers quickly learn to take advantage. "

> 2. Not to even attempt to reason with Nada in a logical way, but

> instead pay attention to her emotions, and try to form responses

> accordingly. Also from SWOE WKBK: " Imagine a clogged sink (Nada's

> brain). The water (rational thinking) is mostly blocked by build-up

> of hair, scum, and whatever else is in there from the past (the

> emotions)....The more time Non-BPs spend searchingfor logical

> answers, the longer they will elude them. "

> 3. I will TRY not to get into an argument over re-written

> history because it will never have a good outcome. I know my reality

> and that's enough.

> 4. I will not put the T in the " Judge " position, but instead

> really try to BE MYSELF (not in a courtroom) and say how her actions

> effect me, right when they happen.

> 5. If she is verbally abusive to me or in reference to my

> husband, I will clearly communicate my personal limits (therapy

> should be a safe place and if it is not I will leave.) O wow, will I

> really? Yes I can do this!

> 6. I will try to figure out exactly why I am going to therapy

> with Nada. I know she will never be my mother in the way that I

> would hope, put perhaps I need to give her this chance as a part of

> my own healing process. Her progress or lack there of is validating

> all of the research and exploration I have been doing since I found

> SWOE and this list.

>

> Blessings,

>

[Guest guest]

GOOD LUCK !!

Jackie

> Tomorrow (in 13.5 hours)I have therapy #3 with Nada. I am doing much

> better this time with the pre-appointment 24 hour anxiety attack. I

> know my heart-rate will increase considerably tomorrow before the

> appointment and my head will pound for hours afterward, but I am glad

> to see a little improvement in myself.

>

> My goals tomorrow.

> 1. To love myself, my opinions, and my values very, very much. I

> just read this in SWOE Workbook and it is so true! " When our sense of

> obligation is greater than our sense of self-respect and self-caring,

> (emotional) blackmailers quickly learn to take advantage. "

> 2. Not to even attempt to reason with Nada in a logical way, but

> instead pay attention to her emotions, and try to form responses

> accordingly. Also from SWOE WKBK: " Imagine a clogged sink (Nada's

> brain). The water (rational thinking) is mostly blocked by build-up

> of hair, scum, and whatever else is in there from the past (the

> emotions)....The more time Non-BPs spend searchingfor logical

> answers, the longer they will elude them. "

> 3. I will TRY not to get into an argument over re-written

> history because it will never have a good outcome. I know my reality

> and that's enough.

> 4. I will not put the T in the " Judge " position, but instead

> really try to BE MYSELF (not in a courtroom) and say how her actions

> effect me, right when they happen.

> 5. If she is verbally abusive to me or in reference to my

> husband, I will clearly communicate my personal limits (therapy

> should be a safe place and if it is not I will leave.) O wow, will I

> really? Yes I can do this!

> 6. I will try to figure out exactly why I am going to therapy

> with Nada. I know she will never be my mother in the way that I

> would hope, put perhaps I need to give her this chance as a part of

> my own healing process. Her progress or lack there of is validating

> all of the research and exploration I have been doing since I found

> SWOE and this list.

>

> Blessings,

>

[Guest guest]

That's right , you can do it! You must 'handle' her; don't

take her as a serious person who can get to you. Grieve for the

fact you never had a mother, and be grateful for the fact that you

DO have husband. You can do it. Just remember she isn't able to

think like you so don't hurt when she says things that if YOU would

say them, you would mean for them to hurt someone. Treat her as a

child or animal to be handled. You can do it!

> Tomorrow (in 13.5 hours)I have therapy #3 with Nada. I am doing

much

> better this time with the pre-appointment 24 hour anxiety attack.

I

> know my heart-rate will increase considerably tomorrow before the

> appointment and my head will pound for hours afterward, but I am

glad

> to see a little improvement in myself.

>

> My goals tomorrow.

> 1. To love myself, my opinions, and my values very, very much.

I

> just read this in SWOE Workbook and it is so true! " When our sense

of

> obligation is greater than our sense of self-respect and self-

caring,

> (emotional) blackmailers quickly learn to take advantage. "

> 2. Not to even attempt to reason with Nada in a logical way,

but

> instead pay attention to her emotions, and try to form responses

> accordingly. Also from SWOE WKBK: " Imagine a clogged sink (Nada's

> brain). The water (rational thinking) is mostly blocked by build-

up

> of hair, scum, and whatever else is in there from the past (the

> emotions)....The more time Non-BPs spend searchingfor logical

> answers, the longer they will elude them. "

> 3. I will TRY not to get into an argument over re-written

> history because it will never have a good outcome. I know my

reality

> and that's enough.

> 4. I will not put the T in the " Judge " position, but instead

> really try to BE MYSELF (not in a courtroom) and say how her

actions

> effect me, right when they happen.

> 5. If she is verbally abusive to me or in reference to my

> husband, I will clearly communicate my personal limits (therapy

> should be a safe place and if it is not I will leave.) O wow, will

I

> really? Yes I can do this!

> 6. I will try to figure out exactly why I am going to therapy

> with Nada. I know she will never be my mother in the way that I

> would hope, put perhaps I need to give her this chance as a part

of

> my own healing process. Her progress or lack there of is

validating

> all of the research and exploration I have been doing since I

found

> SWOE and this list.

>

> Blessings,

>