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Feeling odd...

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Background:

Nada always comes to my house for xmas. This year I asked her to

stay away. I wanted to create good holiday memories with my husband

and son. I have had very limited phone contact and no visits with

her in the past 6 months since her last huge rage.

Problem:

Nada sent 3 huge boxes of presents to my house. Tons for son and for

me, and $ for husband to use to go skiiing. Now, I know that Nada

only has my small family and my sister to buy gifts for. I know that

she likes to shop. I know that every year she goes overboard for

gifts, even when I have asked her not too. I am at the point in my

life where I am decluttering constantly. I really don't want or need

anything small. New furniture- sure. A trip away from the daily

grind, sure.

So, why do I feel bad about all of these gifts? I think it is

because I am mad/sad/annoyed that Nada has not learned who the real

me, what my real wants/needs are. Ahe is doing what makes HER feel

good, instead off what I would actually wish for.

Is this more FOG? Shouldn't I feel grateful that I have so many

beautifully wrapped gifts under the tree? ICK. Plus it will make me

feel inauthentic when I have to thank Nada for all of the lovely

gifts.

Thanks for reading. I feel better knowing that I have vented a bit.

Di.

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