Guest guest Posted March 19, 2004 Report Share Posted March 19, 2004 I have not posted in a while - Free needed her space and ability to work on her issues without my " crowding " her space or crimping her ability to talk freely. But I have to jump in. One of the most basic rules of the group is to not GIVE advice - but to use " I " statements. For example, I could say in response to a post that " I had about the same thing happen, and what I did was... " Unfortunately, what I see a TON of lately is " You should's " - as in YOU should do this or try that or go here or not say that, etc., etc., ad nauseum. IMHO, this is not only counterproductive, it can be harmful, for each person's situation is different. I am sure this will raise some hackles, but, not a lot of injury can be caused to me by black and white pixels on a CRT. Just my two cents worth, of course! YMMV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2004 Report Share Posted March 19, 2004 " I " agree. > I have not posted in a while - Free needed her space and ability to > work on her issues without my " crowding " her space or crimping her > ability to talk freely. But I have to jump in. One of the most > basic rules of the group is to not GIVE advice - but to use " I " > statements. For example, I could say in response to a post that " I > had about the same thing happen, and what I did was... " > Unfortunately, what I see a TON of lately is " You should's " - as in > YOU should do this or try that or go here or not say that, etc., > etc., ad nauseum. IMHO, this is not only counterproductive, it can > be harmful, for each person's situation is different. I am sure > this will raise some hackles, but, not a lot of injury can be caused > to me by black and white pixels on a CRT. Just my two cents worth, > of course! YMMV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 20, 2004 Report Share Posted March 20, 2004 " I " totally agree with you. " I think " if we had remembered to do this, much of the previous animosity would have been avoided. However, " I think " this experience was a great teacher. I know it reminded me of how difficult it is to communicate in written form as opposed to face-to-face. I don't know why it would raise any hackles.....you are just stating one of the rules. Sylvia > I have not posted in a while - Free needed her space and ability to > work on her issues without my " crowding " her space or crimping her > ability to talk freely. But I have to jump in. One of the most > basic rules of the group is to not GIVE advice - but to use " I " > statements. For example, I could say in response to a post that " I > had about the same thing happen, and what I did was... " > Unfortunately, what I see a TON of lately is " You should's " - as in > YOU should do this or try that or go here or not say that, etc., > etc., ad nauseum. IMHO, this is not only counterproductive, it can > be harmful, for each person's situation is different. I am sure > this will raise some hackles, but, not a lot of injury can be caused > to me by black and white pixels on a CRT. Just my two cents worth, > of course! YMMV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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