Guest guest Posted August 4, 2007 Report Share Posted August 4, 2007 " Oh also reminds me that I notice even when there is plenty of room on a footpath (walk way) people seem to gravitate to walking towards me - no matter where I stand or walk, seems others are obliviously aiming at me - I really don't understand it. " Same here. I suppose this behavior can be explained by that ape-like dominance article posted. " Interesting last time I went into town, my mum discovered this phenomenon, as she was carrying a long twisted piece of metal (part of a optical illusion thing, I'd bought for my son), she put it in her bag and it was close to her body, with only a little bit sticking out, amazing how many people walked straight into it though. " Maybe it only happens when she is with you. For some reason, I find it happens to other people when I am with them, but they do not report it happening when I am not with them. It's depressing because I begin to think that not only do people not see me when I am alone, but that I can make other people invisible to society just by being in their presence. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2007 Report Share Posted August 4, 2007 " Oh also reminds me that I notice even when there is plenty of room on a footpath (walk way) people seem to gravitate to walking towards me - no matter where I stand or walk, seems others are obliviously aiming at me - I really don't understand it. " Same here. I suppose this behavior can be explained by that ape-like dominance article posted. " Interesting last time I went into town, my mum discovered this phenomenon, as she was carrying a long twisted piece of metal (part of a optical illusion thing, I'd bought for my son), she put it in her bag and it was close to her body, with only a little bit sticking out, amazing how many people walked straight into it though. " Maybe it only happens when she is with you. For some reason, I find it happens to other people when I am with them, but they do not report it happening when I am not with them. It's depressing because I begin to think that not only do people not see me when I am alone, but that I can make other people invisible to society just by being in their presence. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2007 Report Share Posted August 4, 2007 In a message dated 8/3/2007 5:47:03 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, julie.stevenson16@... writes: This suddenly reminded me of the occasions of not been heard when I speak.There have been quite a few times, like in meetings etc where I have raised a point and got absolutely no reaction and I am sat there wondering if I have spoken aloud, or just thought things in my head. Although I have been quite sure that on occasions I have spoken aloud and then moments later someone else will say the same thing and be acknowledged - I find that particularly frustrating at times. This used to happen to me a lot. Part of the reason was that I have trouble regulating the volume of my voice, always have. For that reason, I usually ended up coming across as quiet. Sometimes people just didn't hear me because of that. Then, I usually back down if someone else starts talking. It is conflict avoidance I suppose, since competing like that tends to make me more aggressive. It wouldn't do to belt someone for talking over you, though it could be amusing, but not worth the bad reputation or jail time. When I was younger, there were also times people talked over me out of that dominance thing. I can even recall my so called best friend talking over me at parties. He would do that and give me that sidelong look he thought made him so sly, but really he just looked like mildly intelligent pig. I can clearly recall the room being full of the kids from class and him doing that, then me leaving and no one even noticing. I actually walked home from one such party and no one noticed for hours. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2007 Report Share Posted August 4, 2007 In a message dated 8/3/2007 5:47:03 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, julie.stevenson16@... writes: This suddenly reminded me of the occasions of not been heard when I speak.There have been quite a few times, like in meetings etc where I have raised a point and got absolutely no reaction and I am sat there wondering if I have spoken aloud, or just thought things in my head. Although I have been quite sure that on occasions I have spoken aloud and then moments later someone else will say the same thing and be acknowledged - I find that particularly frustrating at times. This used to happen to me a lot. Part of the reason was that I have trouble regulating the volume of my voice, always have. For that reason, I usually ended up coming across as quiet. Sometimes people just didn't hear me because of that. Then, I usually back down if someone else starts talking. It is conflict avoidance I suppose, since competing like that tends to make me more aggressive. It wouldn't do to belt someone for talking over you, though it could be amusing, but not worth the bad reputation or jail time. When I was younger, there were also times people talked over me out of that dominance thing. I can even recall my so called best friend talking over me at parties. He would do that and give me that sidelong look he thought made him so sly, but really he just looked like mildly intelligent pig. I can clearly recall the room being full of the kids from class and him doing that, then me leaving and no one even noticing. I actually walked home from one such party and no one noticed for hours. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 In a message dated 8/3/2007 5:48:55 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, julie.stevenson16@... writes: Oh also reminds me that I notice even when there is plenty of room on a footpath (walk way) people seem to gravitate to walking towards me - no matter where I stand or walk, seems others are obliviously aiming at me - I really don't understand it. It is probably the herding instinct. Humans, being social animals, tend to cluster together, especially in time of danger. Personally, I find that rather annoying, particularly since the crowding usually makes a situation worse. There is also the panicky herd behavior of if one person runs, those around them run too, often without knowing why. When I was around 12 or so, my mother and I went to Disney Land or whichever one was in Florida. It was night and we were coming across the lake on one of the two ferry boats. One of the crew ran past us toward the rear looking rather scared and most of the other people, there weren't many, started running too because they saw him run. Looking forward, I could see the other ferry about 50 feet or so, probably more but the night plays with distances, right in front of us. Our ferry was in reverse I guess because I could fell us slowing and turning. Rather than run, I took a couple of pictures. Unfortunately they didn't come out. The military has a lot of trouble with this, soldiers bunching up under fire. That hinders command and makes the troops better targets for the enemy. Still, when panic takes over, the herding instinct is so strong, that at battles like Agincort, the French climbed into piles many men deep and taller than a standing man, killing most of the men in the process. Same happened in more modern battles like Custer's Last Stand and others, though not to that extent. The men did bunch up making them easy targets. Even today, terrorists use this bit of psychology to their advantage. If they do a bombing, they might set secondary bombs in locations where crowds will gather to cause more casualties. Bombings also cause stampedes as well. When in college, we had a few bomb threats. I would always stand away from the crowds in case the bomber knew where the collection areas were and planted something there. During the time of the DC sniper we had a couple of those bomb calls. Again, I stayed on the periphery, moving around the whole time, stopping and starting a little, not enough to call attention, but enough to throw off and aim. Also, I was watching the treeline for things like movement, the glint from a scope, etc. Nothing like that ever happened though. Besides, I think even the sniper would have gone for the crowd which would cause more panic than shooting someone on the outside. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 In a message dated 8/3/2007 5:48:55 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, julie.stevenson16@... writes: Oh also reminds me that I notice even when there is plenty of room on a footpath (walk way) people seem to gravitate to walking towards me - no matter where I stand or walk, seems others are obliviously aiming at me - I really don't understand it. It is probably the herding instinct. Humans, being social animals, tend to cluster together, especially in time of danger. Personally, I find that rather annoying, particularly since the crowding usually makes a situation worse. There is also the panicky herd behavior of if one person runs, those around them run too, often without knowing why. When I was around 12 or so, my mother and I went to Disney Land or whichever one was in Florida. It was night and we were coming across the lake on one of the two ferry boats. One of the crew ran past us toward the rear looking rather scared and most of the other people, there weren't many, started running too because they saw him run. Looking forward, I could see the other ferry about 50 feet or so, probably more but the night plays with distances, right in front of us. Our ferry was in reverse I guess because I could fell us slowing and turning. Rather than run, I took a couple of pictures. Unfortunately they didn't come out. The military has a lot of trouble with this, soldiers bunching up under fire. That hinders command and makes the troops better targets for the enemy. Still, when panic takes over, the herding instinct is so strong, that at battles like Agincort, the French climbed into piles many men deep and taller than a standing man, killing most of the men in the process. Same happened in more modern battles like Custer's Last Stand and others, though not to that extent. The men did bunch up making them easy targets. Even today, terrorists use this bit of psychology to their advantage. If they do a bombing, they might set secondary bombs in locations where crowds will gather to cause more casualties. Bombings also cause stampedes as well. When in college, we had a few bomb threats. I would always stand away from the crowds in case the bomber knew where the collection areas were and planted something there. During the time of the DC sniper we had a couple of those bomb calls. Again, I stayed on the periphery, moving around the whole time, stopping and starting a little, not enough to call attention, but enough to throw off and aim. Also, I was watching the treeline for things like movement, the glint from a scope, etc. Nothing like that ever happened though. Besides, I think even the sniper would have gone for the crowd which would cause more panic than shooting someone on the outside. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 In a message dated 8/5/2007 12:40:49 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply writes: It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for.TomAdministrator An interesting observation. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 In a message dated 8/5/2007 12:40:49 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply writes: It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for.TomAdministrator An interesting observation. Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL.com. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 " Happens in stores too. People ask me things like I work there or something. They are usually a little embarrassed when they realize I'm not an employee. " This happens to me too and I do not understand why. I can be walking around in jeans and a T-shirt and someone will ask me " Excuse me, do you work here? " It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 " Happens in stores too. People ask me things like I work there or something. They are usually a little embarrassed when they realize I'm not an employee. " This happens to me too and I do not understand why. I can be walking around in jeans and a T-shirt and someone will ask me " Excuse me, do you work here? " It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 This suddenly reminded me of the occasions of not been heard when I speak.There have been quite a few times, like in meetings etc where I have raised a point and got absolutely no reaction and I am sat there wondering if I have spoken aloud, or just thought things in my head. Although I have been quite sure that on occasions I have spoken aloud and then moments later someone else will say the same thing and be acknowledged - I find that particularly frustrating at times. replied: "This used to happen to me a lot. Part of the reason was that I have trouble regulating the volume of my voice, always have. For that reason, I usually ended up coming across as quiet. Sometimes people just didn't hear me because of that. " People tend to ignore me also, but I have since found out that when they do hear but say nothing, it isbecause I flatten them with both my logic and deadpan delivery sometimes, and this sets them off. Other times they just don't hear me, or deliberately choose not to hear me, even when I raise my voice. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 This suddenly reminded me of the occasions of not been heard when I speak.There have been quite a few times, like in meetings etc where I have raised a point and got absolutely no reaction and I am sat there wondering if I have spoken aloud, or just thought things in my head. Although I have been quite sure that on occasions I have spoken aloud and then moments later someone else will say the same thing and be acknowledged - I find that particularly frustrating at times. replied: "This used to happen to me a lot. Part of the reason was that I have trouble regulating the volume of my voice, always have. For that reason, I usually ended up coming across as quiet. Sometimes people just didn't hear me because of that. " People tend to ignore me also, but I have since found out that when they do hear but say nothing, it isbecause I flatten them with both my logic and deadpan delivery sometimes, and this sets them off. Other times they just don't hear me, or deliberately choose not to hear me, even when I raise my voice. Tom Administrator Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 I can be in a completely different part of the world, first time visitor, and other visitors will walk right up to me and ask for directions. Uh ... ok. Raven > > " Happens in stores too. People ask me things like I work there or > something. They are usually a little embarrassed when they realize I'm > not an employee. " > > This happens to me too and I do not understand why. I can be walking > around in jeans and a T-shirt and someone will ask me " Excuse me, do > you work here? " > > It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable > people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the > time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for. > > Tom > Administrator > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 I can be in a completely different part of the world, first time visitor, and other visitors will walk right up to me and ask for directions. Uh ... ok. Raven > > " Happens in stores too. People ask me things like I work there or > something. They are usually a little embarrassed when they realize I'm > not an employee. " > > This happens to me too and I do not understand why. I can be walking > around in jeans and a T-shirt and someone will ask me " Excuse me, do > you work here? " > > It's funny that people would mistake us Aspies for knowledgeable > people when they need someone, but that they ignore us the rest of the > time. I guess maybe that is what we are good for. > > Tom > Administrator > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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