Re: ABOUT ME AND MY SON WITH ASPERGERS

[Guest guest]

Consider getting a private evaluation outside of the school. Get an independent phsycologist to run a battery of tests to determine your childs needs. Not cheap but worth it. We had to do that for our son. To the tune of $3000. But to get my child the right education it was a small price to pay. Schools tend to be a bit biased. I would still get their eval but get one of your own as well. You will discover how different the 2 evaluations can be. Also hire an advocate. I just recommended this to someone else. Go to this website www.taskca.org They can help steer you in the right direction. BTW aspergers is legally classified as a disability. Hire an advocate. The school cannot bully you if you have one present to help reperesent you. Good Luck!!!! in Lancaster, Ca tamsexyred34@... wrote: HI MY NAME IS TAMMY ... MY SON IS ALEX AND HE IS 6 YEARS OLD .. I HAVE ALWAYS ACCEPTED ALEX AS ALEX .. BUT HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN DIFFRENT BUT THEN ALL KIDS ARE .ALEX ATE BABY FOOD TILL HE WAS 3 .. ALEX DIDNT GET POTTY TRAINED TILL HE WAS 5 ..ALEX ONCE CLIMBED UP ME TO GET AWAY FROM DIFFRENT KIND OF TILE ON THE FLOOR AND SCREAMED ..ALEX ALWAYS HAD ONE CERTAIN TOY IN HIS HAND AND WOULD SCREAM AND CRY IF YOU TOOK FROM HIM ...YOU COULD GET RID OF THE REST OF HIS TOY BUT NEVER EVER THE ONE TOY HE OBSESSED WITH .. RIGHT NOW IT IS A MAGNA DOODLE ..HE

WANTS TO TAKE IN TO GROCERY STORES ..RESTRAUNTS .. INTO THE BATHROOM .. ALEX DID HAVE A FRIEND BUT HE WOULD GO OVER AND PLAY OVER THERE BUT NOT WITH THE LITTLE BOY .. HE WOULD PLAY SEPERATLY OR A VIDEO GAME HE WOULD PLAY WITH THE BOY ..ALEX TENDS TO RUN IN PLACE OR IN CIRCLES .. AND HE FLAPS HIS HANDS .. YOU KNOW LIKE AFTER YOU WASH YOUR HANDS YOU FLING EM ARROUND TO DRY THEM THAT IS WHAT ALEX DOES . HEALSO USES LOTS OF HAND GESTURES WHICH MEAN NOTHING TO ME ...HE HAS A EYE TICK AND RAPID BLINKING ..ALEX IS HARD TO TALK TO .. YOU HAVE TO PULL TEETH TO GET HM TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND SOME WONT EVEN GET A RESPONCE .. PEOPLE WILL SAY HI ALEX AND HE IGNORES .. I THOUGHT WHY IS ALEX RUDE ? WHEN HIGHLY NERVOUS NO EYE CONTACT BUT HE WOULD HUG AND KISS ME AND HIS DAD .. SO WHEN A NURSE AND A FRIEND WHO IS A PARA SUGGESTED HE HAVE SOME FORM OF AUTISM OR TOURETTES I THOUGHT THEY WERE CRAZY .,. MY SON IS NOT LIKE RAINMAN AND THAT IS ALL I KNEW ABOUT AUTISM ..I FELT

INSULTED HOW DARE SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY SON ..ALEX USED TO WASH HIS HANDS 20 OR MORE TIMES A DAY .. HE WONT EAT MOST FOODS .. CHEESE PIZZA .. CHICKEN NUGGETS ...HE WOULD ONLY EAT BABY FOOD WHEN HE WAS A BABY . SO HIM BEING PICKY HAS BEEN NOTHING NEW .. HE WONT EAT ANY VEGGIES ..AND IF WE TRY TO GET HIM TO .. HE STARTS ACTING LIKE HE IS GONNA VOMMIT .. HE WONT SIT STILL AT A MEAL HE IS UP RUNNING ARROUND IN CIRCLES OR WASHING HIS HANDS ..IF HE GETS DIRT OR FOOD OR ANYTHING ON ONE OF HIS TOYS HE IS DISGUSTED AND WILL THROUGH ACROSS THE ROOM...HE IS NOT VIOLENT .. BUT HE WHINES AND CRYS .. ALOT .IF WE GO SOMEWHERE . HE REPEATS CAN WE GO HOME NOW CAN WE GO HOME NOW .. UNTIL WE GET HOME .. THREATS WONT EVEN GET HIM TO STOP .. HE WANTS TO BE WITH ME ALL THE TIME .. AND MY OTHER SON HAS ACCUSED ME OF PLAYING FAVORITES CUZ ALEX WONT LEAVE ME ALONE .. AND I THINK THERE IS JEALOUSY BUT WHAT TO DO ? DO I TELL ALEX TO GO AWAY ? NO SO I TRY TO MAKE EXTRA SPECIAL TIME FOR ME

AND MY OTHER CHILDREN .ALEX STUTTERS AND THIS YEAR ALEX IS IN 1ST GRADE .. AND AT 12 NOON EVERYDAY ALEX SAYS CAN I GO HOME NOW ... AND TEACHER TELLS HIM NO . AND THEN HE REFUSED TO DO SCHOOL WORK.. WONT TALK AND NO EYE CONTACT PERIOD ...THE TEACHER SAYS HE IS NOT ACCPETED BY THE GROUP .. HE IS PICKED LAST AT EVERYTHING BY HIS PEERS .. DOESNT HAVE FRIENDS AND DOESNT SEEM TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS .. I HAVE SIGNED PAPERS FOR EVALUATION AND IN THE PROCESS .. PRINCIPAL AND SCHOOL PSYCHOLOGIST ARE DRAGGIN THERE ASSES AND NOT HELPING ...THEY HAVE TOLD ME HE EVEN WITH ASPERGERS MAY NOT QUALIFY FOR A IEP ...HIS PSYCHOLOGIST .. SAYS HE HAS ASPERGERS IN AUTISM SPECTRUM DOESNT HAVE A MOOD DISORDER ..BUT SENSORY INTEGRATION ISSUES ..AND DELAYS .. AND POSSIBLY HE WILL BE RX WITH PDD IN 6 MONTHS ..ALEX DOESNT LIKE TO WEAR CLOTHES .. WHEN HE GETS HOME HE STRIPS DOWN TO BOXERS .. HE WEARS CLOTHES INSIDE OUT .. UNLESS I MAKE HIM CHANGE ..HE WEARS SHOES ON THE WRONG FOOT AND IS NOT

BOTHERED BY IT ...MY SON HAS POOPED OUTSIDE IN THE FRONT YARD HE HAS NO MANNERS NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES WE TELL HIM HE POOPS OUTSIDE .. OR HE ANNOUNCES LOUDLY IN RESTRAUNT HE FARTED OR POOPED .. I HAVE OFTEN SAID TO MY FRIENDS .. I CANT SEEM TO TEACH HIM MANNERS OR ETIQUETTE ..HE ONLY LIKES TO TALK ABOUT HIS VIDEO GAMES .. YOU CANT INISIATE A CONVERSATION HE IS JUST NOT INTERESTED ... HE CAN TELL YOU THE NAMES OF ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE GAME .. BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANIAMALS OR ANYTHING ELSE .. MY FAMILY MY MOTHER IN LAWS HAVE COMPLAINED IT IS HARD TO BOND WITH HIM .. WHICH I FIND INSULTING .. HE IS THE CHILD THEY NEED TO INISIATE THE BONDING ..I CANT FIND A PSYCHIATRIST TO SEE HIM THIS YEAR THERE ALL BOOKED .. OR NOT TAKING NEW PATIENTS .. MY SON HATES SCHOOL .. AND GETS UPSET ON FRIDAY ABOUT HAVING TO RETURN TO SCHOOL ON MONDAY .. HE SAYS EVERYONE HATES HIIM , AND SOMEONE TOOK SCISSORS TO HIS BACKPACK ..HE CAME HOME . AND GOT HOME AND ROCKED BACK AND FORTH

FOR A HOUR .. CRYING ABOUT THE BACKPACK .. THEN DIDNT WANT IT AFTER A HOUR .. SAID IT WAS RUINED ANDWANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT ...HE CRIES AND WHINES ALL THE TIME ... HE WANTS THINGS JUST SO ... AND IF I DONT GET HIM CHOCOLATE MILK HE CRIES AND WHINES .. IF HIS 2 YEAR OLD SISTER DOESNT SLEEP WITH HIM HE CRIES AND SCREAMS .. IF THE HALL LIGHT AND NITE LIGHT AND BATHROOM LIGHT IS NOT ON HE SCREAMS .. EVERYONE HAS THERE OPINIONS .. I HAVE TRIED TO FIND OUT WHAT I NEED TO DO FOR HIM ..EVERYONE SAYS HE NEEDS OT ... WELL WHERE THE HELL DO I GET OT ? I HAVE TALKED TO AUTISM 1800 LINES AND THEY TELL ME IT IS REALLY MERCURY POISONING AND GET MEDS TO TAKE MERCURY OUT AND HE WILL BE FINE .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO GET REFRIDGE BOX AND PUT HIM IN IT WHEN HE SCREAMS .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO RUN MY HOME LIKE A DRILL CAMP ... WHAT TO DO I DONT KNOW ... I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO A MOM OF A CHILD ... WHO HAS HAD WHAT MY SON HAS AND TO SEE WHAT

SOLUTIONS AND THINGS I NEED TO DO .. I HAVE CALLED EVERYONE AND MY SON IS STILL TORMENTED TO GO TO SCHOOL ... I DONT KNWO WHAT TO DO .. I TRY TO ENCOURAGE HIM .. I LOVE HIM AND NO ONE SEEMS TO GET HE IS TRAMATIZED GOING TO SCHOOL BUT I HAVE BEEN TOLD .. IF HE DOESNT GO .. I WILL NOT GET THE HELP HE NEEDS .. SO PLEASE EMAIL ME .. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE .. I WILL GIVE NUMBER IF YOU EMAIL ME THANK YOU .. A CONCERNED MOM TAMMY

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[Guest guest]

well god bless you ... im sorry i probally sound so self centered i know my son doesn't have it the worst but it is the pain from my son i feel ... i am frustrated and i have begun asking people to pray for alex and our family to have peace with whatever comes our way ... you sound like a loving mom and grandma .. your children are lucky god bless you .. tammy

i came fron dysfunctional home also ... but i found being a survivor is enpowering and not living like a survivor .. ithink it sounds like you would agree

[Guest guest]

Hi Tammy,

I read your long letter clear to the end, and really enjoyed you pouring your heart out to us, and this is my response, hang in there lady! You are going through a lot with your son right now. I had a son like yours, and now he is all grown up, his name is Marty. He was like your son when he was a child, had many problems like your son has, and had seizures too, lots of seizures, nearly every day. I got all sorts of conflicting advice too, and really all I could do was take it one day at a time, and that is probably all you can do too.

We get the idea, don't know where it comes from, that there is an "answer" and a "solution," and maybe there are some answers and some solutions along the way, but with me and my son anyway, there has never been THEE answer, and THEE solution. We have just taken what comes along and dealt with it every day.

And for that we needed strength, and we needed faith, so I became a Christian in 1973, gave my life to Jesus Christ, not saying everybody has to do that, but it was all I could think of to do when my son was little, was to turn to God for help. Because they had told me he was hopeless, the "experts," told me that I should put him into the state institution and just forget about him, that he would make me nuts, I would become an alcoholic, a dope addict, my husband would leave me.

Not very nice things to say to a mom who just simply loved her child, and wanted to help him, as you do yours I am sure. I worried about the other kids too, he has two brothers older and a little sister younger, and now all four of them are grown up. And we still just take one day at a time.

My son Marty is now 42 years old, and the others are in their 40s too, only my daughter is 36. They have been through a lot in life, I have been through a lot in life too, their father turned to alcohol and he died of cirrhosis of his liver, I quit drinking, carried on taking care of the family. I knew they needed me. I have found we all have choices, that is about all we have, and we don't control the whole universe!

So we have to accept what we cannot change. Now I sound like I am in recovery, well actually I am in recover to some things. Am not a control freak anymore, but just accept the things I cannot change, and ask God to give me the courage and the wisdom to change the things I can. I think he has done this in my life, in my son's life, in my families life. We have all been in recovery to old ways of thinking that actually were dysfunctional.

I found my son was not the really big problem, but my OWN thinking was, and it has changed. So he has had his purpose, all things have a purpose I do believe, and all things work together for GOOD, for those who love GOd, and are called according to His purpose......this is Bible.

Well that is about all I will say for now, anyway I do hope you will keep writing to us, because we do care about you, and many of us understand what you are going through, we have been, and are going through it, and we are here to love you, and to love one another, and to support one another.

Now I am going out with my 2 year old grandson, Lucas. I take care of 3 grandchildren every day for my daughter, who works. My son Marty is sitting in his chair playing with his shoe laces, he does not get up and run around the house anymore tearing it up, and I praise God for that, his school years are long behind him, I took him out at age 18, had enough of school by then. He is on a food tube, big decision there, but he is much healthier now, his seizures are way down now, he wears depends now.

Who would have thought he would ever be like this, he cannot get up alone now, has no balance, doesn't talk, but he is so handsome, looks like his dad, and I love him so much every day it would be impossible to explain with words. He speaks so much with his eyes, they are beautiful eyes with so much expression, so much love radiating from him, from me, though us......

So all we can do is thank God for our lives I think, and take it one day at a time. Please keep writing sis.

Much love,

Carolyn in Oregon, beautiful fall day, and we are heading out now to do something, me and my grandson. will stay with Marty.....

ABOUT ME AND MY SON WITH ASPERGERS

HI MY NAME IS TAMMY ... MY SON IS ALEX AND HE IS 6 YEARS OLD .. I HAVE ALWAYS ACCEPTED ALEX AS ALEX .. BUT HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN DIFFRENT BUT THEN ALL KIDS ARE .ALEX ATE BABY FOOD TILL HE WAS 3 .. ALEX DIDNT GET POTTY TRAINED TILL HE WAS 5 ..ALEX ONCE CLIMBED UP ME TO GET AWAY FROM DIFFRENT KIND OF TILE ON THE FLOOR AND SCREAMED ..ALEX ALWAYS HAD ONE CERTAIN TOY IN HIS HAND AND WOULD SCREAM AND CRY IF YOU TOOK FROM HIM ...YOU COULD GET RID OF THE REST OF HIS TOY BUT NEVER EVER THE ONE TOY HE OBSESSED WITH .. RIGHT NOW IT IS A MAGNA DOODLE ..HE WANTS TO TAKE IN TO GROCERY STORES ..RESTRAUNTS .. INTO THE BATHROOM ..

ALEX DID HAVE A FRIEND BUT HE WOULD GO OVER AND PLAY OVER THERE BUT NOT WITH THE LITTLE BOY .. HE WOULD PLAY SEPERATLY OR A VIDEO GAME HE WOULD PLAY WITH THE BOY ..ALEX TENDS TO RUN IN PLACE OR IN CIRCLES .. AND HE FLAPS HIS HANDS .. YOU KNOW LIKE AFTER YOU WASH YOUR HANDS YOU FLING EM ARROUND TO DRY THEM THAT IS WHAT ALEX DOES . HEALSO USES LOTS OF HAND GESTURES WHICH MEAN NOTHING TO ME ...HE HAS A EYE TICK AND RAPID BLINKING ..ALEX IS HARD TO TALK TO .. YOU HAVE TO PULL TEETH TO GET HM TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND SOME WONT EVEN GET A RESPONCE .. PEOPLE WILL SAY HI ALEX AND HE IGNORES .. I THOUGHT WHY IS ALEX RUDE ? WHEN HIGHLY NERVOUS NO EYE CONTACT BUT HE WOULD HUG AND KISS ME AND HIS DAD .. SO WHEN A NURSE AND A FRIEND WHO IS A PARA SUGGESTED HE HAVE SOME FORM OF AUTISM OR TOURETTES I THOUGHT THEY WERE CRAZY .,. MY SON IS NOT LIKE RAINMAN AND THAT IS ALL I KNEW ABOUT AUTISM ..I FELT INSULTED HOW DARE SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY SON ..ALEX USED TO WASH HIS HANDS 20 OR MORE TIMES A DAY .. HE WONT EAT MOST FOODS .. CHEESE PIZZA .. CHICKEN NUGGETS ...HE WOULD ONLY EAT BABY FOOD WHEN HE WAS A BABY . SO HIM BEING PICKY HAS BEEN NOTHING NEW .. HE WONT EAT ANY VEGGIES ..AND IF WE TRY TO GET HIM TO .. HE STARTS ACTING LIKE HE IS GONNA VOMMIT .. HE WONT SIT STILL AT A MEAL HE IS UP RUNNING ARROUND IN CIRCLES OR WASHING HIS HANDS ..IF HE GETS DIRT OR FOOD OR ANYTHING ON ONE OF HIS TOYS HE IS DISGUSTED AND WILL THROUGH ACROSS THE ROOM...HE IS NOT VIOLENT .. BUT HE WHINES AND CRYS .. ALOT .IF WE GO SOMEWHERE . HE REPEATS CAN WE GO HOME NOW CAN WE GO HOME NOW .. UNTIL WE GET HOME .. THREATS WONT EVEN GET HIM TO STOP .. HE WANTS TO BE WITH ME ALL THE TIME .. AND MY OTHER SON HAS ACCUSED ME OF PLAYING FAVORITES CUZ ALEX WONT LEAVE ME ALONE .. AND I THINK THERE IS JEALOUSY BUT WHAT TO DO ? DO I TELL ALEX TO GO AWAY ? NO SO I TRY TO MAKE EXTRA SPECIAL TIME FOR ME AND MY OTHER CHILDREN .ALEX STUTTERS AND THIS YEAR ALEX IS IN 1ST GRADE .. AND AT 12 NOON EVERYDAY ALEX SAYS CAN I GO HOME NOW ... AND TEACHER TELLS HIM NO . AND THEN HE REFUSED TO DO SCHOOL WORK.. WONT TALK AND NO EYE CONTACT PERIOD ...THE TEACHER SAYS HE IS NOT ACCPETED BY THE GROUP .. HE IS PICKED LAST AT EVERYTHING BY HIS PEERS .. DOESNT HAVE FRIENDS AND DOESNT SEEM TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS .. I HAVE SIGNED PAPERS FOR EVALUATION AND IN THE PROCESS .. PRINCIPAL AND SCHOOL PSYCHOLOGIST ARE DRAGGIN THERE ASSES AND NOT HELPING ...THEY HAVE TOLD ME HE EVEN WITH ASPERGERS MAY NOT QUALIFY FOR A IEP ...HIS PSYCHOLOGIST .. SAYS HE HAS ASPERGERS IN AUTISM SPECTRUM DOESNT HAVE A MOOD DISORDER ..BUT SENSORY INTEGRATION ISSUES ..AND DELAYS .. AND POSSIBLY HE WILL BE RX WITH PDD IN 6 MONTHS ..ALEX DOESNT LIKE TO WEAR CLOTHES .. WHEN HE GETS HOME HE STRIPS DOWN TO BOXERS .. HE WEARS CLOTHES INSIDE OUT .. UNLESS I MAKE HIM CHANGE ..HE WEARS SHOES ON THE WRONG FOOT AND IS NOT BOTHERED BY IT ...MY SON HAS POOPED OUTSIDE IN THE FRONT YARD HE HAS NO MANNERS NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES WE TELL HIM HE POOPS OUTSIDE .. OR HE ANNOUNCES LOUDLY IN RESTRAUNT HE FARTED OR POOPED .. I HAVE OFTEN SAID TO MY FRIENDS .. I CANT SEEM TO TEACH HIM MANNERS OR ETIQUETTE ..HE ONLY LIKES TO TALK ABOUT HIS VIDEO GAMES .. YOU CANT INISIATE A CONVERSATION HE IS JUST NOT INTERESTED ... HE CAN TELL YOU THE NAMES OF ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE GAME .. BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANIAMALS OR ANYTHING ELSE .. MY FAMILY MY MOTHER IN LAWS HAVE COMPLAINED IT IS HARD TO BOND WITH HIM .. WHICH I FIND INSULTING .. HE IS THE CHILD THEY NEED TO INISIATE THE BONDING ..I CANT FIND A PSYCHIATRIST TO SEE HIM THIS YEAR THERE ALL BOOKED .. OR NOT TAKING NEW PATIENTS .. MY SON HATES SCHOOL .. AND GETS UPSET ON FRIDAY ABOUT HAVING TO RETURN TO SCHOOL ON MONDAY .. HE SAYS EVERYONE HATES HIIM , AND SOMEONE TOOK SCISSORS TO HIS BACKPACK ..HE CAME HOME . AND GOT HOME AND ROCKED BACK AND FORTH FOR A HOUR .. CRYING ABOUT THE BACKPACK .. THEN DIDNT WANT IT AFTER A HOUR .. SAID IT WAS RUINED ANDWANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT ...HE CRIES AND WHINES ALL THE TIME ... HE WANTS THINGS JUST SO ... AND IF I DONT GET HIM CHOCOLATE MILK HE CRIES AND WHINES .. IF HIS 2 YEAR OLD SISTER DOESNT SLEEP WITH HIM HE CRIES AND SCREAMS .. IF THE HALL LIGHT AND NITE LIGHT AND BATHROOM LIGHT IS NOT ON HE SCREAMS ..

EVERYONE HAS THERE OPINIONS .. I HAVE TRIED TO FIND OUT WHAT I NEED TO DO FOR HIM ..EVERYONE SAYS HE NEEDS OT ... WELL WHERE THE HELL DO I GET OT ? I HAVE TALKED TO AUTISM 1800 LINES AND THEY TELL ME IT IS REALLY MERCURY POISONING AND GET MEDS TO TAKE MERCURY OUT AND HE WILL BE FINE .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO GET REFRIDGE BOX AND PUT HIM IN IT WHEN HE SCREAMS .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO RUN MY HOME LIKE A DRILL CAMP ... WHAT TO DO I DONT KNOW ...

I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO A MOM OF A CHILD ... WHO HAS HAD WHAT MY SON HAS AND TO SEE WHAT SOLUTIONS AND THINGS I NEED TO DO .. I HAVE CALLED EVERYONE AND MY SON IS STILL TORMENTED TO GO TO SCHOOL ... I DONT KNWO WHAT TO DO .. I TRY TO ENCOURAGE HIM .. I LOVE HIM AND NO ONE SEEMS TO GET HE IS TRAMATIZED GOING TO SCHOOL BUT I HAVE BEEN TOLD .. IF HE DOESNT GO .. I WILL NOT GET THE HELP HE NEEDS ..

SO PLEASE EMAIL ME .. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE .. I WILL GIVE NUMBER IF YOU EMAIL ME THANK YOU .. A CONCERNED MOM TAMMY

[Guest guest]

Hi Tammy,

I read your long letter clear to the end, and really enjoyed you pouring your heart out to us, and this is my response, hang in there lady! You are going through a lot with your son right now. I had a son like yours, and now he is all grown up, his name is Marty. He was like your son when he was a child, had many problems like your son has, and had seizures too, lots of seizures, nearly every day. I got all sorts of conflicting advice too, and really all I could do was take it one day at a time, and that is probably all you can do too.

We get the idea, don't know where it comes from, that there is an "answer" and a "solution," and maybe there are some answers and some solutions along the way, but with me and my son anyway, there has never been THEE answer, and THEE solution. We have just taken what comes along and dealt with it every day.

And for that we needed strength, and we needed faith, so I became a Christian in 1973, gave my life to Jesus Christ, not saying everybody has to do that, but it was all I could think of to do when my son was little, was to turn to God for help. Because they had told me he was hopeless, the "experts," told me that I should put him into the state institution and just forget about him, that he would make me nuts, I would become an alcoholic, a dope addict, my husband would leave me.

Not very nice things to say to a mom who just simply loved her child, and wanted to help him, as you do yours I am sure. I worried about the other kids too, he has two brothers older and a little sister younger, and now all four of them are grown up. And we still just take one day at a time.

My son Marty is now 42 years old, and the others are in their 40s too, only my daughter is 36. They have been through a lot in life, I have been through a lot in life too, their father turned to alcohol and he died of cirrhosis of his liver, I quit drinking, carried on taking care of the family. I knew they needed me. I have found we all have choices, that is about all we have, and we don't control the whole universe!

So we have to accept what we cannot change. Now I sound like I am in recovery, well actually I am in recover to some things. Am not a control freak anymore, but just accept the things I cannot change, and ask God to give me the courage and the wisdom to change the things I can. I think he has done this in my life, in my son's life, in my families life. We have all been in recovery to old ways of thinking that actually were dysfunctional.

I found my son was not the really big problem, but my OWN thinking was, and it has changed. So he has had his purpose, all things have a purpose I do believe, and all things work together for GOOD, for those who love GOd, and are called according to His purpose......this is Bible.

Well that is about all I will say for now, anyway I do hope you will keep writing to us, because we do care about you, and many of us understand what you are going through, we have been, and are going through it, and we are here to love you, and to love one another, and to support one another.

Now I am going out with my 2 year old grandson, Lucas. I take care of 3 grandchildren every day for my daughter, who works. My son Marty is sitting in his chair playing with his shoe laces, he does not get up and run around the house anymore tearing it up, and I praise God for that, his school years are long behind him, I took him out at age 18, had enough of school by then. He is on a food tube, big decision there, but he is much healthier now, his seizures are way down now, he wears depends now.

Who would have thought he would ever be like this, he cannot get up alone now, has no balance, doesn't talk, but he is so handsome, looks like his dad, and I love him so much every day it would be impossible to explain with words. He speaks so much with his eyes, they are beautiful eyes with so much expression, so much love radiating from him, from me, though us......

So all we can do is thank God for our lives I think, and take it one day at a time. Please keep writing sis.

Much love,

Carolyn in Oregon, beautiful fall day, and we are heading out now to do something, me and my grandson. will stay with Marty.....

ABOUT ME AND MY SON WITH ASPERGERS

HI MY NAME IS TAMMY ... MY SON IS ALEX AND HE IS 6 YEARS OLD .. I HAVE ALWAYS ACCEPTED ALEX AS ALEX .. BUT HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN DIFFRENT BUT THEN ALL KIDS ARE .ALEX ATE BABY FOOD TILL HE WAS 3 .. ALEX DIDNT GET POTTY TRAINED TILL HE WAS 5 ..ALEX ONCE CLIMBED UP ME TO GET AWAY FROM DIFFRENT KIND OF TILE ON THE FLOOR AND SCREAMED ..ALEX ALWAYS HAD ONE CERTAIN TOY IN HIS HAND AND WOULD SCREAM AND CRY IF YOU TOOK FROM HIM ...YOU COULD GET RID OF THE REST OF HIS TOY BUT NEVER EVER THE ONE TOY HE OBSESSED WITH .. RIGHT NOW IT IS A MAGNA DOODLE ..HE WANTS TO TAKE IN TO GROCERY STORES ..RESTRAUNTS .. INTO THE BATHROOM ..

ALEX DID HAVE A FRIEND BUT HE WOULD GO OVER AND PLAY OVER THERE BUT NOT WITH THE LITTLE BOY .. HE WOULD PLAY SEPERATLY OR A VIDEO GAME HE WOULD PLAY WITH THE BOY ..ALEX TENDS TO RUN IN PLACE OR IN CIRCLES .. AND HE FLAPS HIS HANDS .. YOU KNOW LIKE AFTER YOU WASH YOUR HANDS YOU FLING EM ARROUND TO DRY THEM THAT IS WHAT ALEX DOES . HEALSO USES LOTS OF HAND GESTURES WHICH MEAN NOTHING TO ME ...HE HAS A EYE TICK AND RAPID BLINKING ..ALEX IS HARD TO TALK TO .. YOU HAVE TO PULL TEETH TO GET HM TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND SOME WONT EVEN GET A RESPONCE .. PEOPLE WILL SAY HI ALEX AND HE IGNORES .. I THOUGHT WHY IS ALEX RUDE ? WHEN HIGHLY NERVOUS NO EYE CONTACT BUT HE WOULD HUG AND KISS ME AND HIS DAD .. SO WHEN A NURSE AND A FRIEND WHO IS A PARA SUGGESTED HE HAVE SOME FORM OF AUTISM OR TOURETTES I THOUGHT THEY WERE CRAZY .,. MY SON IS NOT LIKE RAINMAN AND THAT IS ALL I KNEW ABOUT AUTISM ..I FELT INSULTED HOW DARE SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY SON ..ALEX USED TO WASH HIS HANDS 20 OR MORE TIMES A DAY .. HE WONT EAT MOST FOODS .. CHEESE PIZZA .. CHICKEN NUGGETS ...HE WOULD ONLY EAT BABY FOOD WHEN HE WAS A BABY . SO HIM BEING PICKY HAS BEEN NOTHING NEW .. HE WONT EAT ANY VEGGIES ..AND IF WE TRY TO GET HIM TO .. HE STARTS ACTING LIKE HE IS GONNA VOMMIT .. HE WONT SIT STILL AT A MEAL HE IS UP RUNNING ARROUND IN CIRCLES OR WASHING HIS HANDS ..IF HE GETS DIRT OR FOOD OR ANYTHING ON ONE OF HIS TOYS HE IS DISGUSTED AND WILL THROUGH ACROSS THE ROOM...HE IS NOT VIOLENT .. BUT HE WHINES AND CRYS .. ALOT .IF WE GO SOMEWHERE . HE REPEATS CAN WE GO HOME NOW CAN WE GO HOME NOW .. UNTIL WE GET HOME .. THREATS WONT EVEN GET HIM TO STOP .. HE WANTS TO BE WITH ME ALL THE TIME .. AND MY OTHER SON HAS ACCUSED ME OF PLAYING FAVORITES CUZ ALEX WONT LEAVE ME ALONE .. AND I THINK THERE IS JEALOUSY BUT WHAT TO DO ? DO I TELL ALEX TO GO AWAY ? NO SO I TRY TO MAKE EXTRA SPECIAL TIME FOR ME AND MY OTHER CHILDREN .ALEX STUTTERS AND THIS YEAR ALEX IS IN 1ST GRADE .. AND AT 12 NOON EVERYDAY ALEX SAYS CAN I GO HOME NOW ... AND TEACHER TELLS HIM NO . AND THEN HE REFUSED TO DO SCHOOL WORK.. WONT TALK AND NO EYE CONTACT PERIOD ...THE TEACHER SAYS HE IS NOT ACCPETED BY THE GROUP .. HE IS PICKED LAST AT EVERYTHING BY HIS PEERS .. DOESNT HAVE FRIENDS AND DOESNT SEEM TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS .. I HAVE SIGNED PAPERS FOR EVALUATION AND IN THE PROCESS .. PRINCIPAL AND SCHOOL PSYCHOLOGIST ARE DRAGGIN THERE ASSES AND NOT HELPING ...THEY HAVE TOLD ME HE EVEN WITH ASPERGERS MAY NOT QUALIFY FOR A IEP ...HIS PSYCHOLOGIST .. SAYS HE HAS ASPERGERS IN AUTISM SPECTRUM DOESNT HAVE A MOOD DISORDER ..BUT SENSORY INTEGRATION ISSUES ..AND DELAYS .. AND POSSIBLY HE WILL BE RX WITH PDD IN 6 MONTHS ..ALEX DOESNT LIKE TO WEAR CLOTHES .. WHEN HE GETS HOME HE STRIPS DOWN TO BOXERS .. HE WEARS CLOTHES INSIDE OUT .. UNLESS I MAKE HIM CHANGE ..HE WEARS SHOES ON THE WRONG FOOT AND IS NOT BOTHERED BY IT ...MY SON HAS POOPED OUTSIDE IN THE FRONT YARD HE HAS NO MANNERS NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES WE TELL HIM HE POOPS OUTSIDE .. OR HE ANNOUNCES LOUDLY IN RESTRAUNT HE FARTED OR POOPED .. I HAVE OFTEN SAID TO MY FRIENDS .. I CANT SEEM TO TEACH HIM MANNERS OR ETIQUETTE ..HE ONLY LIKES TO TALK ABOUT HIS VIDEO GAMES .. YOU CANT INISIATE A CONVERSATION HE IS JUST NOT INTERESTED ... HE CAN TELL YOU THE NAMES OF ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE GAME .. BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANIAMALS OR ANYTHING ELSE .. MY FAMILY MY MOTHER IN LAWS HAVE COMPLAINED IT IS HARD TO BOND WITH HIM .. WHICH I FIND INSULTING .. HE IS THE CHILD THEY NEED TO INISIATE THE BONDING ..I CANT FIND A PSYCHIATRIST TO SEE HIM THIS YEAR THERE ALL BOOKED .. OR NOT TAKING NEW PATIENTS .. MY SON HATES SCHOOL .. AND GETS UPSET ON FRIDAY ABOUT HAVING TO RETURN TO SCHOOL ON MONDAY .. HE SAYS EVERYONE HATES HIIM , AND SOMEONE TOOK SCISSORS TO HIS BACKPACK ..HE CAME HOME . AND GOT HOME AND ROCKED BACK AND FORTH FOR A HOUR .. CRYING ABOUT THE BACKPACK .. THEN DIDNT WANT IT AFTER A HOUR .. SAID IT WAS RUINED ANDWANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT ...HE CRIES AND WHINES ALL THE TIME ... HE WANTS THINGS JUST SO ... AND IF I DONT GET HIM CHOCOLATE MILK HE CRIES AND WHINES .. IF HIS 2 YEAR OLD SISTER DOESNT SLEEP WITH HIM HE CRIES AND SCREAMS .. IF THE HALL LIGHT AND NITE LIGHT AND BATHROOM LIGHT IS NOT ON HE SCREAMS ..

EVERYONE HAS THERE OPINIONS .. I HAVE TRIED TO FIND OUT WHAT I NEED TO DO FOR HIM ..EVERYONE SAYS HE NEEDS OT ... WELL WHERE THE HELL DO I GET OT ? I HAVE TALKED TO AUTISM 1800 LINES AND THEY TELL ME IT IS REALLY MERCURY POISONING AND GET MEDS TO TAKE MERCURY OUT AND HE WILL BE FINE .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO GET REFRIDGE BOX AND PUT HIM IN IT WHEN HE SCREAMS .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO RUN MY HOME LIKE A DRILL CAMP ... WHAT TO DO I DONT KNOW ...

I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO A MOM OF A CHILD ... WHO HAS HAD WHAT MY SON HAS AND TO SEE WHAT SOLUTIONS AND THINGS I NEED TO DO .. I HAVE CALLED EVERYONE AND MY SON IS STILL TORMENTED TO GO TO SCHOOL ... I DONT KNWO WHAT TO DO .. I TRY TO ENCOURAGE HIM .. I LOVE HIM AND NO ONE SEEMS TO GET HE IS TRAMATIZED GOING TO SCHOOL BUT I HAVE BEEN TOLD .. IF HE DOESNT GO .. I WILL NOT GET THE HELP HE NEEDS ..

SO PLEASE EMAIL ME .. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE .. I WILL GIVE NUMBER IF YOU EMAIL ME THANK YOU .. A CONCERNED MOM TAMMY

[Guest guest]

Dear Carolyn and Tammy,

I read both your letters, every word.

My daughter is 38 and I couldn't have taken one step without God's help. I got wonderful Guidance right from the beginning, without even asking Him.

Love,

Francine

[Guest guest]

Tammy, My son is also called , he has aspergers. I really do sympathize with you. My son is 4 and I took him out of nursery as he is bullied I now teach him at home. He still wears nappies at night and for a poo and he has a bottle and has to play with my hair whilst he drinks it. He finds it hard to mix as people don't get him. He wee's outside in front of people and swears and loses his rag if things are not quite right. He also loves his magna doodle and spends ages colouring in the whole thing. If anyone touches it he goes mad. My other children also think I favour , it is really hard. Especially when you have to give the child more attention. also speaks like an adult sometimes things he comes out with like "This is a beautiful sky tonight" he is just so gifted in some ways. His computer skills are great and so is his art work. I try to concentrate on

these things. It is hard with the behaviour. I know there is no way to get round things and a lot of people just think it is bad parenting. My mother in law won't accept that there is anything wrong with at all. It is really hard. If you would like to write to me again please do. We have an appointment on the 10th October with another paediatrician hopefully we can get more help. Take care Dawn, WalesM Strahlendorf <pgnsht@...> wrote: Consider

getting a private evaluation outside of the school. Get an independent phsycologist to run a battery of tests to determine your childs needs. Not cheap but worth it. We had to do that for our son. To the tune of $3000. But to get my child the right education it was a small price to pay. Schools tend to be a bit biased. I would still get their eval but get one of your own as well. You will discover how different the 2 evaluations can be. Also hire an advocate. I just recommended this to someone else. Go to this website www.taskca.org They can help steer you in the right direction. BTW aspergers is legally classified as a disability. Hire an advocate. The school cannot bully you if you have one present to help reperesent you. Good Luck!!!! in Lancaster, Ca tamsexyred34aol wrote: HI MY NAME IS TAMMY ... MY SON IS ALEX AND HE IS 6 YEARS OLD .. I HAVE ALWAYS ACCEPTED ALEX AS ALEX .. BUT HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN DIFFRENT BUT THEN ALL KIDS ARE .ALEX ATE BABY FOOD TILL HE WAS 3 .. ALEX DIDNT GET POTTY TRAINED TILL HE WAS 5 ..ALEX ONCE CLIMBED UP ME TO GET AWAY FROM DIFFRENT KIND OF TILE ON THE FLOOR AND SCREAMED ..ALEX ALWAYS HAD ONE CERTAIN TOY IN HIS HAND AND WOULD SCREAM AND CRY IF YOU TOOK FROM HIM ...YOU COULD GET RID OF THE REST OF HIS TOY BUT NEVER EVER THE ONE TOY HE OBSESSED WITH .. RIGHT NOW IT IS A MAGNA DOODLE ..HE WANTS TO TAKE IN TO GROCERY STORES ..RESTRAUNTS .. INTO THE BATHROOM .. ALEX DID HAVE A FRIEND BUT HE WOULD GO OVER AND PLAY OVER THERE BUT NOT WITH THE LITTLE BOY .. HE WOULD PLAY SEPERATLY OR A VIDEO GAME HE WOULD PLAY WITH THE BOY ..ALEX TENDS TO RUN IN PLACE OR IN CIRCLES .. AND HE FLAPS HIS HANDS .. YOU KNOW LIKE

AFTER YOU WASH YOUR HANDS YOU FLING EM ARROUND TO DRY THEM THAT IS WHAT ALEX DOES . HEALSO USES LOTS OF HAND GESTURES WHICH MEAN NOTHING TO ME ...HE HAS A EYE TICK AND RAPID BLINKING ..ALEX IS HARD TO TALK TO .. YOU HAVE TO PULL TEETH TO GET HM TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND SOME WONT EVEN GET A RESPONCE .. PEOPLE WILL SAY HI ALEX AND HE IGNORES .. I THOUGHT WHY IS ALEX RUDE ? WHEN HIGHLY NERVOUS NO EYE CONTACT BUT HE WOULD HUG AND KISS ME AND HIS DAD .. SO WHEN A NURSE AND A FRIEND WHO IS A PARA SUGGESTED HE HAVE SOME FORM OF AUTISM OR TOURETTES I THOUGHT THEY WERE CRAZY .,. MY SON IS NOT LIKE RAINMAN AND THAT IS ALL I KNEW ABOUT AUTISM ..I FELT INSULTED HOW DARE SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY SON ..ALEX USED TO WASH HIS HANDS 20 OR MORE TIMES A DAY .. HE WONT EAT MOST FOODS .. CHEESE PIZZA .. CHICKEN NUGGETS ...HE WOULD ONLY EAT BABY FOOD WHEN HE WAS A BABY . SO HIM BEING PICKY HAS BEEN NOTHING NEW .. HE WONT EAT ANY VEGGIES ..AND IF WE TRY TO GET HIM TO .. HE STARTS

ACTING LIKE HE IS GONNA VOMMIT .. HE WONT SIT STILL AT A MEAL HE IS UP RUNNING ARROUND IN CIRCLES OR WASHING HIS HANDS ..IF HE GETS DIRT OR FOOD OR ANYTHING ON ONE OF HIS TOYS HE IS DISGUSTED AND WILL THROUGH ACROSS THE ROOM...HE IS NOT VIOLENT .. BUT HE WHINES AND CRYS .. ALOT .IF WE GO SOMEWHERE . HE REPEATS CAN WE GO HOME NOW CAN WE GO HOME NOW .. UNTIL WE GET HOME .. THREATS WONT EVEN GET HIM TO STOP .. HE WANTS TO BE WITH ME ALL THE TIME .. AND MY OTHER SON HAS ACCUSED ME OF PLAYING FAVORITES CUZ ALEX WONT LEAVE ME ALONE .. AND I THINK THERE IS JEALOUSY BUT WHAT TO DO ? DO I TELL ALEX TO GO AWAY ? NO SO I TRY TO MAKE EXTRA SPECIAL TIME FOR ME AND MY OTHER CHILDREN .ALEX STUTTERS AND THIS YEAR ALEX IS IN 1ST GRADE .. AND AT 12 NOON EVERYDAY ALEX SAYS CAN I GO HOME NOW ... AND TEACHER TELLS HIM NO . AND THEN HE REFUSED TO DO SCHOOL WORK.. WONT TALK AND NO EYE CONTACT PERIOD ...THE TEACHER SAYS HE IS NOT ACCPETED BY THE GROUP .. HE IS PICKED LAST AT EVERYTHING BY HIS

PEERS .. DOESNT HAVE FRIENDS AND DOESNT SEEM TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS .. I HAVE SIGNED PAPERS FOR EVALUATION AND IN THE PROCESS .. PRINCIPAL AND SCHOOL PSYCHOLOGIST ARE DRAGGIN THERE ASSES AND NOT HELPING ...THEY HAVE TOLD ME HE EVEN WITH ASPERGERS MAY NOT QUALIFY FOR A IEP ...HIS PSYCHOLOGIST .. SAYS HE HAS ASPERGERS IN AUTISM SPECTRUM DOESNT HAVE A MOOD DISORDER ..BUT SENSORY INTEGRATION ISSUES ..AND DELAYS .. AND POSSIBLY HE WILL BE RX WITH PDD IN 6 MONTHS ..ALEX DOESNT LIKE TO WEAR CLOTHES .. WHEN HE GETS HOME HE STRIPS DOWN TO BOXERS .. HE WEARS CLOTHES INSIDE OUT .. UNLESS I MAKE HIM CHANGE ..HE WEARS SHOES ON THE WRONG FOOT AND IS NOT BOTHERED BY IT ...MY SON HAS POOPED OUTSIDE IN THE FRONT YARD HE HAS NO MANNERS NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES WE TELL HIM HE POOPS OUTSIDE .. OR HE ANNOUNCES LOUDLY IN RESTRAUNT HE FARTED OR POOPED .. I HAVE OFTEN SAID TO MY FRIENDS .. I CANT SEEM TO TEACH HIM MANNERS OR ETIQUETTE ..HE ONLY LIKES TO TALK ABOUT HIS VIDEO GAMES .. YOU CANT

INISIATE A CONVERSATION HE IS JUST NOT INTERESTED ... HE CAN TELL YOU THE NAMES OF ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE GAME .. BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANIAMALS OR ANYTHING ELSE .. MY FAMILY MY MOTHER IN LAWS HAVE COMPLAINED IT IS HARD TO BOND WITH HIM .. WHICH I FIND INSULTING .. HE IS THE CHILD THEY NEED TO INISIATE THE BONDING ..I CANT FIND A PSYCHIATRIST TO SEE HIM THIS YEAR THERE ALL BOOKED .. OR NOT TAKING NEW PATIENTS .. MY SON HATES SCHOOL .. AND GETS UPSET ON FRIDAY ABOUT HAVING TO RETURN TO SCHOOL ON MONDAY .. HE SAYS EVERYONE HATES HIIM , AND SOMEONE TOOK SCISSORS TO HIS BACKPACK ..HE CAME HOME . AND GOT HOME AND ROCKED BACK AND FORTH FOR A HOUR .. CRYING ABOUT THE BACKPACK .. THEN DIDNT WANT IT AFTER A HOUR .. SAID IT WAS RUINED ANDWANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT ...HE CRIES AND WHINES ALL THE TIME ... HE WANTS THINGS JUST SO ... AND IF I DONT GET HIM CHOCOLATE MILK HE CRIES AND WHINES .. IF HIS 2 YEAR OLD SISTER DOESNT SLEEP WITH HIM HE CRIES AND SCREAMS .. IF THE

HALL LIGHT AND NITE LIGHT AND BATHROOM LIGHT IS NOT ON HE SCREAMS .. EVERYONE HAS THERE OPINIONS .. I HAVE TRIED TO FIND OUT WHAT I NEED TO DO FOR HIM ..EVERYONE SAYS HE NEEDS OT ... WELL WHERE THE HELL DO I GET OT ? I HAVE TALKED TO AUTISM 1800 LINES AND THEY TELL ME IT IS REALLY MERCURY POISONING AND GET MEDS TO TAKE MERCURY OUT AND HE WILL BE FINE .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO GET REFRIDGE BOX AND PUT HIM IN IT WHEN HE SCREAMS .. I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO RUN MY HOME LIKE A DRILL CAMP ... WHAT TO DO I DONT KNOW ... I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO A MOM OF A CHILD ... WHO HAS HAD WHAT MY SON HAS AND TO SEE WHAT SOLUTIONS AND THINGS I NEED TO DO .. I HAVE CALLED EVERYONE AND MY SON IS STILL TORMENTED TO GO TO SCHOOL ... I DONT KNWO WHAT TO DO .. I TRY TO ENCOURAGE HIM .. I LOVE HIM AND NO ONE SEEMS TO GET HE IS TRAMATIZED GOING TO SCHOOL BUT I HAVE BEEN TOLD .. IF HE DOESNT GO .. I WILL NOT GET THE HELP HE NEEDS .. SO PLEASE EMAIL ME .. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE .. I WILL GIVE NUMBER IF YOU EMAIL ME THANK YOU .. A CONCERNED MOM TAMMY Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Small Business.

All new "The new Interface is stunning in its simplicity and ease of use." - PC Magazine

[Guest guest]

Hi tammy,

I dont know how much it helps but first, you are NOT ALONE. there are

many of us out here just like you and have children just like your

alex. My daughter Miranda is the same age, she started first grade

aug 20th and we have been experiencing about 80 percent of the

issuses you listed in your post. so how does that help? I'm not

sure, but know on those times when you feel like you aren't making

sense or making a difference there are those around you can reach out

to, to vent with, and sometimes even learn from. I would echo the

sentiment of Carolyn that the primary thing that keeps me centered

and positive is my relationship with Christ. when miranda was first

diagnosed naturally we prayed that she would be healed, that the

doctors would find some quick remedy(chelation etc.) that would make

her " right " . however I listened to a speaker, who is a missionary

whose mission field is individuals with disabilities and their

families, give a recount of his personal story with their daughter

who is severly disabled. He had done like me, as we are both

charismatic pentecostals by faith, and taken his daughter to prayer

services etc. then he recounted an afternoon in his office where he

was just thinking about his daughter and praying that she would be

healed and made perfect, and suddenly in that quiet voice that God

uses when we are really listening God asked him " WHO TOLD YOU SHE

ISN'T PERFECT NOW? " . this testimony moved me greatly and changed my

focus from how to " fix " my daughter to how to empower her and educate

myself and others about her and the wonderful gift that she is.

Unfortunately while asperger's being in the dsm-IV makes it a

disability and in as much as possible the school must make

accomodations for your son however the school only has to provide

enough services to allow your son to get an appropriate education at

no cost to you(other than worry and hassle). I am fightng the exact

same battle as you right now with the school and as i find leverage i

will certainly pass it on. What state do you live in? I live in

florida, we moved here from Massachusetts.( we did not know miranda

had aspergers when we moved or we would never have done it). Florida

is in many ways like living in a third or maybe a second world

country. the medical care except at one of about 3-5 hospitals is

substandard for a developed country. oops there i go ranting about

the very people I need to help my daughter. being a survivor is an

excellent testimony but in Christ we are more than conquerors and I

CAN do all things through christ who strengthens me.

we will be praying for you

[Guest guest]

Hi, I was wondering what state you are in? In California we have

Regional Centers where we can receive free assessments and free/low

cost therapy for qualifying individuals. Also many states have local

Resource Centers for Families to get information and support.

Be careful where you receive your information from the internet.

There are many sites that try to sell you " treatments " that have been

unproven and some can be dangerous. However, there is a wealth of

information from the sites:

www.autism-society.org

http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/ (which is known as OASIS)

http://www.feat.org ( has links to other states)

http://www.nichcy.org/

http://www.childpsychologist.com/

http://www.yellowpagesforkids.com/ (a must for every parent)

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=philcommander (I added this site

because this father is so inspirational to me)

Don't forget to go to your states website and check out their

information on disablities.

The trick to researching all these sites is when you find a site you

like or a link you want to go back to, put it on your favorites list.

I go back to these sites again and again.

Also all this information can make your head spin, so take it one day

at a time and remember to take care of yourself...

Good luck and keep your head up!

J.

[Guest guest]

PLEASE LETS TALK SOMETIME MY SON IS 6 ALSO .. AND FUNNY ALEXS MIDDLE NAME IS JONAH .. AND ALL PRAYERS ARE APPREICAITED ... IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE LET ME KNOW .. I WOULD LIKE TO COMPARE NOTES WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A SON THE SAME AGE AS MINE ... ALEX IS 6 BUT IN 1ST GRADE AND NOT DOING WELL .. THERE EVALUATING HIM NOW .. TO SEE IF HE CAN GET A IEP .. AND THE PRINCIPAL AND PSYCHOLOGIST OF THE SCHOOL ARE NOT ON MY SIDE BUT THE TEACHER IS THANKS .. TAMMY DAVIS I LIVE IN KANSAS

[Guest guest]

PLEASE LETS TALK SOMETIME MY SON IS 6 ALSO .. AND FUNNY ALEXS MIDDLE NAME IS JONAH .. AND ALL PRAYERS ARE APPREICAITED ... IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TALK ON THE PHONE LET ME KNOW .. I WOULD LIKE TO COMPARE NOTES WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A SON THE SAME AGE AS MINE ... ALEX IS 6 BUT IN 1ST GRADE AND NOT DOING WELL .. THERE EVALUATING HIM NOW .. TO SEE IF HE CAN GET A IEP .. AND THE PRINCIPAL AND PSYCHOLOGIST OF THE SCHOOL ARE NOT ON MY SIDE BUT THE TEACHER IS THANKS .. TAMMY DAVIS I LIVE IN KANSAS

[Guest guest]

Tammy, you can call me anytime. If it's not good, I'll let you know and call you back when it is.

Love,

Francine.

[Guest guest]

I have to jump in here all, sorry! My 6 (almost 7 yr old) was just diagnosed PDD nos on Friday. Which the doc tells me means, he has all but 1 or two key symptoms/indications of AS but since he does not have those, he does not "fit" the AS diagnosis. ANYWAY, my son is also in first grade and his writing is bad. He is particularly bad with writing 3's backwards I have noticed. He is stuck on his reading and is in Title I reading (extra help, not special ed) because in his mind, vowels can only make 1 sound, not short and long or however I can explain it better verbally. It seems that whatever vowel sound he picked up on first is the sound the vowel makes, that is the rule. You told me it makes this sound so it can't make another!!! (this is my interpretation of what is going on, that it is not logical to him that the same letter makes different sounds at different times.) Just wondered if anyone else is going through this or has and if there are any suggestions. I am

not sure how to approach the school re all of this either so I would appreciate any input. God Bless! DeeDeetamsexyred34@... wrote: WE SON CANT WRITE .. AND THEY SAID HE CANT GET HELP TILL HE HAS A IEP .. HE CAN WRITE .. BUT IT IS MESSY AND ALL HIS NUMBERS ARE BACKWARDS ... BUT HE IS 6 WITH ASPERGERS

Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

[Guest guest]

According to Regional Center, my daughter is a dx of PDD, mainly because through a lot of work we have been able to stop the tippy toe walking and hand flapping. Unfortunately, at this point - with my husband getting out of the Navy and regional center saying she doesn't qualify because they don't think that she has autism (because her symptoms have abated thru our hard work!) she will be getting zero therapy unless we can find a government job for dh - I make 32 a year with no benefits - soooooo....d corbin <jdcorbin_2000@...> wrote: I have to jump in here all, sorry! My 6 (almost 7 yr old) was just diagnosed PDD nos on Friday. Which the doc tells me means, he has all but 1 or two key symptoms/indications of AS but since he does not have those, he does not "fit" the AS diagnosis. ANYWAY, my son is also in first grade and his writing is bad. He is particularly bad with writing 3's backwards I have noticed. He is stuck on his reading and is in Title I reading (extra help, not special ed) because in his mind, vowels can only make 1 sound, not short and long or however I can explain it better verbally. It seems that whatever vowel sound he picked up on first is the sound the vowel makes, that is the rule. You told me it makes this sound so it can't make another!!! (this is my interpretation of what is going on, that it is not logical to him that the same letter makes different sounds at different times.) Just wondered if anyone else is going through this or has and if

there are any suggestions. I am not sure how to approach the school re all of this either so I would appreciate any input. God Bless! DeeDeetamsexyred34aol wrote: WE SON CANT WRITE .. AND THEY SAID HE CANT GET HELP TILL HE HAS A IEP .. HE CAN WRITE .. BUT IT IS MESSY AND ALL HIS NUMBERS ARE BACKWARDS ... BUT HE IS 6 WITH ASPERGERS Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min. A great teacher never strives to explain his vision - he simply invites you to stand beside him and see for yourself.... The Rev. R. Inman Children are likely to live up to what you believe of them -

Lady Bird Treat a child as though he already is the person he's capable of becoming - Haim Gnott

Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Small Business.

[Guest guest]

I have one son with Aspergers and the other has dyslexia. The

schools have a hard time teaching reading more then one way. We

used an Orton gillingham trained tutor twice a week and found great

success. We ultimaley transfered him to a school for children with

reading disabilites and in 6 months he made a years progress in

reading using these methods. You may not want to totally rely on

the school, they tend to believe that kids need more practice and

will learn versus changing strategies to help.

Good luck,

in Minnesota

> WE SON CANT WRITE .. AND THEY SAID HE CANT GET HELP

TILL HE HAS A IEP .. HE CAN WRITE .. BUT IT IS MESSY AND ALL HIS

NUMBERS ARE BACKWARDS ... BUT HE IS 6 WITH ASPERGERS

>

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls.

Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

>

[Guest guest]

Tammy - Your son sounds like my son when he was 6, but now he is 9 and in 4th grade and after therapy and lots of learning he is now completely mainstreamed and his new teacher can't understand why he was labeled as aspergers with an IEP. The beginning of this journey can be frightening and an emotional roller coaster. Your strength and love are what will help him and the rest of your family.

I know your message is weeks old but I would be happy to speak with you and give you the benefit of our experience. Email me off line at ljohn96625@....

The school just told me my son is the poster child of their program. I thank God for all the people who gave me the benefit of their experience at the beginning of our discovery period!