Guest guest Posted March 15, 2006 Report Posted March 15, 2006 , I KNOW EXACTLY how you feel! My daughter is 13 and her need for contact (on her terms only of course!) is overwhelming much of the time too. Between she and her younger brother (now six and needing less thank goodness) they often make me want to scream, please just quit touching me and let me breathe by the end of the day. I have been known to just throw my hands up and say PLEASE, let me have some space. I am ALL about my kids but I have NO privacy/space 90% of the time. Not even in the tub or restroom! I also want to give her what she needs but not sure what is a good compromise for the two of us in this area. I am only 5'3 " and 150# and she is 5'0 " and 120# now and still wants to sit " on " me all the time etc. It is hard. Glad to hear someone else feels that way, if anyone out there has any suggestions, I am sure we would appreciate it. God Bless! DeeDee --- <Luvourlives@...> wrote: > Does anyone else here have a child with a high need > for physical > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so > fantastic I think > there are days where if he were reevaluated he may > not even carry that > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, > some sensory needs. > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem > more pronounced. He > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing > to be touching me > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on > his shoulder etc). > Now I should not be complaining that he still sits > with me or needs > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he > isn't defensive to > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he > weighs about 60 lbs > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he > sits on my lap he > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that > I swear he feels > like he weighs more than that. Last night his head > on my shoulder > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a > whiner. But at the end > of the day I just get so tired of having someone > that close to me and I > want to scream. > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type > activity?? Not > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be > confined so I can't > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his > little brother. Any > thoughts. > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have > such an extreme > need, but I know the need is still there and realize > it is time to add > to my bag of tricks. > > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote
Guest guest Posted March 15, 2006 Report Posted March 15, 2006 It sounds like he is craving some deep pressure. What type of sensory diet does he have at school? He is missing that being home and using your body to get that proprioceptive input. http://www.sensorysmarts.com/diet.html Does he have a weighted vest at school he wears? My son did in preschool and then in K-1 the OT lent the classroom a swish disk for him to sit on. Now they add some books to his backpack and have some tape around a section in the classroom for him to walk laps. Also the class runs around the playground a few laps before or after circle time. Do you have a bouncy ball, a weighted lap pad or quilt to use at home? Is there a swing in the yard? http://www.thegraycenter.org/sensoryinfo.cfm These links should give you ideas on what to do at home. Use a blanket to wrap him in and push pillows into his body for pressure. They sell at Toys R Us those socker boppers you blow up and put in the hands, good for punching and also they have punching bags you can put up or that kind that you add water or sand and blow up. Play some kids music songs and dance around. They also have those keyboards you can dance on that light up and make music. Bonnie Sayers http://autismspectrumdisorders.bellaonline.com ========== <Luvourlives@...> wrote: Does anyone else here have a child with a high need for physical contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so fantastic I think there are days where if he were reevaluated he may not even carry that diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, some sensory needs.He has has been sick this week so his needs seem more pronounced. He kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing to be touching me or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on his shoulder etc). Now I should not be complaining that he still sits with me or needs hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he isn't defensive to touch. But he is not a small child. I think he weighs about 60 lbs (weight is an issue for another day) and when he sits on my lap he lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that I swear he feels like he weighs more than that. Last night his head on my shoulder really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a whiner. But at the end of the day I just get so tired of having someone that close to me and I want to scream.Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type activity?? Not sure what activities I should do. He hates to be confined so I can't wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his little brother. Any thoughts.Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have such an extreme need, but I know the need is still there and realize it is time to add to my bag of tricks. Quote
Guest guest Posted March 16, 2006 Report Posted March 16, 2006 My son has always been like this. We found that having him do things that are "heavy work" really helps. We try to make a game of it but do things like jumping on a trampolene, push ups, carrying things, arm excercises with my pilates bands. We also found that brushing and doing joint compressions really helped. Also doing "squishing" with bean bags or wrapping him in a blanket (burrito) help. I also find that when he is sick he is more "sensory". We find that when the yeast in his body is too high that he is too tactile as well. This is one of the things that is hardest for him because he is often in appropriate with the other kids and teachers at school. Hope this is a few ideas. I certainly understand the need for space! When was little there were days when I thought I would go mad. lj Quote
Guest guest Posted March 16, 2006 Report Posted March 16, 2006 I agree! It is fabulous to not be alone in this. I can be very guilt provoking to want to scream when your child hugs you for the 20th time. I hope you find some answers soon too! > > > Does anyone else here have a child with a high need > > for physical > > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so > > fantastic I think > > there are days where if he were reevaluated he may > > not even carry that > > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, > > some sensory needs. > > > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem > > more pronounced. He > > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing > > to be touching me > > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on > > his shoulder etc). > > Now I should not be complaining that he still sits > > with me or needs > > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he > > isn't defensive to > > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he > > weighs about 60 lbs > > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he > > sits on my lap he > > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that > > I swear he feels > > like he weighs more than that. Last night his head > > on my shoulder > > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a > > whiner. But at the end > > of the day I just get so tired of having someone > > that close to me and I > > want to scream. > > > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type > > activity?? Not > > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be > > confined so I can't > > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his > > little brother. Any > > thoughts. > > > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have > > such an extreme > > need, but I know the need is still there and realize > > it is time to add > > to my bag of tricks. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote
Guest guest Posted March 16, 2006 Report Posted March 16, 2006 Same problem here, but my 11 year old is 5'3'' and weighs 170 lbs. Talk about crush-cuddling! Tracey Re: Get off me, already!! , I KNOW EXACTLY how you feel! My daughter is 13and her need for contact (on her terms only ofcourse!) is overwhelming much of the time too. Betweenshe and her younger brother (now six and needing lessthank goodness) they often make me want to scream,please just quit touching me and let me breathe by theend of the day. I have been known to just throw myhands up and say PLEASE, let me have some space. I amALL about my kids but I have NO privacy/space 90% ofthe time. Not even in the tub or restroom! I also wantto give her what she needs but not sure what is a goodcompromise for the two of us in this area. I am only5'3" and 150# and she is 5'0" and 120# now and stillwants to sit "on" me all the time etc. It is hard. Glad to hear someone else feels that way, if anyoneout there has any suggestions, I am sure we wouldappreciate it. God Bless! DeeDee --- <Luvourlives@...> wrote:> Does anyone else here have a child with a high need> for physical > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so> fantastic I think > there are days where if he were reevaluated he may> not even carry that > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately,> some sensory needs.> > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem> more pronounced. He > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing> to be touching me > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on> his shoulder etc). > Now I should not be complaining that he still sits> with me or needs > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he> isn't defensive to > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he> weighs about 60 lbs > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he> sits on my lap he > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that> I swear he feels > like he weighs more than that. Last night his head> on my shoulder > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a> whiner. But at the end > of the day I just get so tired of having someone> that close to me and I > want to scream.> > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type> activity?? Not > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be> confined so I can't > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his> little brother. Any > thoughts.> > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have> such an extreme > need, but I know the need is still there and realize> it is time to add > to my bag of tricks.> > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote
Guest guest Posted March 17, 2006 Report Posted March 17, 2006 I am right there with ya. My son (aspie) is 12 and my daughter is 5 so I even have the same age difference! -Charlotte Re: Get off me, already!! , I KNOW EXACTLY how you feel! My daughter is 13 and her need for contact (on her terms only of course!) is overwhelming much of the time too. Between she and her younger brother (now six and needing less thank goodness) they often make me want to scream, please just quit touching me and let me breathe by the end of the day. I have been known to just throw my hands up and say PLEASE, let me have some space. I am ALL about my kids but I have NO privacy/space 90% of the time. Not even in the tub or restroom! I also want to give her what she needs but not sure what is a good compromise for the two of us in this area. I am only 5'3 " and 150# and she is 5'0 " and 120# now and still wants to sit " on " me all the time etc. It is hard. Glad to hear someone else feels that way, if anyone out there has any suggestions, I am sure we would appreciate it. God Bless! DeeDee --- <Luvourlives@...> wrote: > Does anyone else here have a child with a high need > for physical > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so > fantastic I think > there are days where if he were reevaluated he may > not even carry that > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, > some sensory needs. > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem > more pronounced. He > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing > to be touching me > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on > his shoulder etc). > Now I should not be complaining that he still sits > with me or needs > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he > isn't defensive to > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he > weighs about 60 lbs > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he > sits on my lap he > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that > I swear he feels > like he weighs more than that. Last night his head > on my shoulder > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a > whiner. But at the end > of the day I just get so tired of having someone > that close to me and I > want to scream. > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type > activity?? Not > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be > confined so I can't > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his > little brother. Any > thoughts. > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have > such an extreme > need, but I know the need is still there and realize > it is time to add > to my bag of tricks. > > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote
Guest guest Posted March 17, 2006 Report Posted March 17, 2006 What is it with the hugging? I feel like such a jerk. Most mothers would kill for their 12 year old son to hug them all the time but I swear every time I turn around, there he is!! And he's as big as me! Re: Get off me, already!! I agree! It is fabulous to not be alone in this. I can be very guilt provoking to want to scream when your child hugs you for the 20th time. I hope you find some answers soon too! > > > Does anyone else here have a child with a high need > > for physical > > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is doing so > > fantastic I think > > there are days where if he were reevaluated he may > > not even carry that > > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, > > some sensory needs. > > > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem > > more pronounced. He > > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or needing > > to be touching me > > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand on > > his shoulder etc). > > Now I should not be complaining that he still sits > > with me or needs > > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he > > isn't defensive to > > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he > > weighs about 60 lbs > > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he > > sits on my lap he > > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way that > > I swear he feels > > like he weighs more than that. Last night his head > > on my shoulder > > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a > > whiner. But at the end > > of the day I just get so tired of having someone > > that close to me and I > > want to scream. > > > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure type > > activity?? Not > > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be > > confined so I can't > > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with his > > little brother. Any > > thoughts. > > > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't have > > such an extreme > > need, but I know the need is still there and realize > > it is time to add > > to my bag of tricks. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote
Guest guest Posted March 17, 2006 Report Posted March 17, 2006 better hugging than kissing. all my son wants to do is " kiss me " on the cheek. everytime i turn around there he is or i wake up and he is standing next to my bed giving me a kiss. carrie --- Charlotte <scottdesigns@...> wrote: > What is it with the hugging? I feel like such a > jerk. Most mothers would > kill for their 12 year old son to hug them all the > time but I swear every > time I turn around, there he is!! And he's as big > as me! > > Re: Get off me, > already!! > > I agree! It is fabulous to not be alone in this. I > can be very guilt > provoking to want to scream when your child hugs you > for the 20th > time. I hope you find some answers soon too! > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone else here have a child with a high > need > > > for physical > > > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is > doing so > > > fantastic I think > > > there are days where if he were reevaluated he > may > > > not even carry that > > > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately, > > > some sensory needs. > > > > > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem > > > more pronounced. He > > > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or > needing > > > to be touching me > > > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand > on > > > his shoulder etc). > > > Now I should not be complaining that he still > sits > > > with me or needs > > > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he > > > isn't defensive to > > > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he > > > weighs about 60 lbs > > > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he > > > sits on my lap he > > > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way > that > > > I swear he feels > > > like he weighs more than that. Last night his > head > > > on my shoulder > > > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a > > > whiner. But at the end > > > of the day I just get so tired of having someone > > > that close to me and I > > > want to scream. > > > > > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure > type > > > activity?? Not > > > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be > > > confined so I can't > > > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with > his > > > little brother. Any > > > thoughts. > > > > > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't > have > > > such an extreme > > > need, but I know the need is still there and > realize > > > it is time to add > > > to my bag of tricks. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > > Quote
Guest guest Posted March 19, 2006 Report Posted March 19, 2006 , sooooooooo sweet............... I know it can be frustrating though. Trust me I know... my son does the same thing but I always try to remember that in a few years he is not going to want anything to do with me and the kisses will stop.... I know I will miss it.... in Lancaster, Cacarrie stapp <carriestapp@...> wrote: better hugging than kissing. all my son wants to dois "kiss me" on the cheek. everytime i turn aroundthere he is or i wake up and he is standing next to mybed giving me a kiss. carrie --- Charlotte <scottdesigns@...> wrote:> What is it with the hugging? I feel like such a> jerk. Most mothers would> kill for their 12 year old son to hug them all the> time but I swear every> time I turn around, there he is!! And he's as big> as me!> > Re: Get off me,> already!!> > I agree! It is fabulous to not be alone in this. I> can be very guilt > provoking to want to scream when your child hugs you> for the 20th > time. I hope you find some answers soon too!> > > > > > > > > > Does anyone else here have a child with a high> need> > > for physical > > > contact?? Alonzo is 8, diagnosed HFA. He is> doing so> > > fantastic I think > > > there are days where if he were reevaluated he> may> > > not even carry that > > > diagnosis. But there are still, most definately,> > > some sensory needs.> > > > > > He has has been sick this week so his needs seem> > > more pronounced. He > > > kept asking for hugs or sitting on my lap or> needing> > > to be touching me > > > or be touched (leaning on me or putting my hand> on> > > his shoulder etc). > > > Now I should not be complaining that he still> sits> > > with me or needs > > > hugs. Certainly it could be worse... at least he> > > isn't defensive to > > > touch. But he is not a small child. I think he> > > weighs about 60 lbs > > > (weight is an issue for another day) and when he> > > sits on my lap he > > > lands very hard and just sinks into me in a way> that> > > I swear he feels > > > like he weighs more than that. Last night his> head> > > on my shoulder > > > really hurt it was so heavy. Gosh I feel like a> > > whiner. But at the end > > > of the day I just get so tired of having someone> > > that close to me and I > > > want to scream.> > > > > > Anyways I think it is a needs for deep pressure> type> > > activity?? Not > > > sure what activities I should do. He hates to be> > > confined so I can't > > > wrap him in a blanket like I do sometimes with> his> > > little brother. Any > > > thoughts.> > > > > > Thankfully when he is feeling well he doesn't> have> > > such an extreme > > > need, but I know the need is still there and> realize> > > it is time to add > > > to my bag of tricks.> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________> > Quote
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