Guest guest Posted April 15, 2000 Report Share Posted April 15, 2000 Hi Pam, I had heard or read those statistics, as well, and thought of the the incredible blessing that those who chose to terminate their DS pregnancy missed. Whenever I talk about angels with Sara, she says she is one...I agree. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings...mine are the same. Marcia Mom to Sara (DS) and 5 and Lucas 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 15, 2000 Report Share Posted April 15, 2000 Hi Pam, I had heard or read those statistics, as well, and thought of the the incredible blessing that those who chose to terminate their DS pregnancy missed. Whenever I talk about angels with Sara, she says she is one...I agree. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings...mine are the same. Marcia Mom to Sara (DS) and 5 and Lucas 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 15, 2000 Report Share Posted April 15, 2000 Perhaps due to my pregnancy I am overly emotional, but the thought that only 3% of children like ours are born is making me cry. No one could look at my Maggie and think she shouldn't have been born! Aborting babies with DS Hi Friends, The last I read on this subject these were the percentages. I also heard it on a news program. It's97 or 98 % of babies with DS that do not have a chance to be born in this world. Just a small 3% get to be born. How can mothers decide this? I don't understand. I really don't. I know someone now struggling with knowing her unborn baby has DS. I wish so much she would reach out to me. I think if she were around the girls just for a day she would make up her mind quickly. They are all such sweet angels. Just think when we all get to heaven how many of them (DS Angels) will be there. Have you ever noticed how the old pictures and paintings you see of angels all look like they have DS? In some country, I can't remember which one, the people there really believe they are angels. hmmm... I don't know what do you think??? : ) Do you think A higher Being sent us these children for a reason and purpose? I know mine have changed my life for the better so much and I love them more than anything in this world. Pam mom to Hannah and identical twins age 4 almost 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 15, 2000 Report Share Posted April 15, 2000 , I didn't mean for you to cry but it is sad. I remember when I first heard this awful news it really made me mad but mostly I just felt sorry for all the mothers who were too scared to at least try. I know for most that is a very hard decission to make. There are alot of thinkgs to think about. But I feel strongly women who are pregnant with DS children should have to or want to spend a week or so with someone with DS. I know several grown up DS people who work and lead a pretty normal life. They have a right to make it in this world just the same as us. I know one thing for sure, if there were more people in this world who had DS this place would be a better place to live! : ) Pam mom to Hannah and identical twins age 4 Dean Stauffer <Sandds@...> wrote: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 15, 2000 Report Share Posted April 15, 2000 Hi Pam, I know my little guy is n angel! And I have never been around a person so sweet, loving, hugable!,ect.... has changed my life and those in my family also. When I became pregnant with and Tyler my dr. was strongly suggesting I have an abortion because of the increased risk of downs. (I thought this guy was out of his mind ) Like I told him, I believed I was pregnant fo a reason (and not just because I love to fool around with my husband) but because it was meant to be. I didn't care if I had a child with downs and am so happy to have . I would love to have 20 of them! I don't understand how anyone could end a pregnacy because of this and those who do, wouldn't have been fit to be their mother. Kelli.... wife of Greg, mother to ,Greg,April,Ash,(ds)and Tyler(age4), friend of Dena,daughter to Lynda, sister to Viki, Trasi,Rick and Jon. The End Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 Well said !! Amber : ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 I'm jumping in on this one.....I think part of the reason for such a high rate of women choosing to terminate their pregnancy is because the medical community, in general, pushes the fact that this is a problem. Down syndrome is an abnormality that they want to rectify. And since there is not a cure, termination is looked upon as the solution to the problem. I feel this way very strongly. Even in my own family. There is a subtle pressure, even when I was younger, after I'd had the boys, that I was not to reproduce again. Really. Just comments, and you didn't have to be paranoid to get the meaning. " Be happy with what you have. " " You have your hands full " . " You have a nice little family. " " You'd be crazy to have another " Sometimes when I'm with Danny people give me funny looks, sad looks, annoyed looks. I used to think they were being judgemental, but now I realize, they may have made a decision to terminate a baby with Ds and it's painful to confront the dream that was taken from them. I strongly feel that it is the medical community that should be educated about the humanity of people with Ds, not women. There is too much pressure on them already, and being morningsick and tired and hormonal and possibly under pressure from family, husband, doctors, they're not in a position to be strong and hold onto their pregnancies. They might think they're being selfish to keep the baby. I have women call me through the hospital's genetic counseling program. They ask me question after question. I answer them, and try to make them and their pregnancy seem very important and very valuable. I do not pressure either way, although I have my definite feelings about terminating. To me it has a name. Genocide: the systematic EXTERMINATION of a race or cultural group. In my mind Danny is not an angel. They are a separate creation of God. Spiritual beings created as pure spirit. Children with Down syndrome are humans, created differently, and born to this world presenting challenges to a generally spoiled and indulged society. They are a reality check. They have lessons to teach for those open to learn. Patience. Acceptance. Overcoming medical crises. And if raised in love, the love they are so talented in giving back is the best I've ever encountered in my life. But so much is lost in this throw away society. There are groups you can join on the net for this issue. We have our children so obviously we made a choice to accept or were surprised with the birth of a different child. But among us there may also be people who chose differently on another occasion. I never judge. I just beleive in encouraging women to see their pregnancy as theirs. And no one has a right to take it away. Jean n and Danny's mom (age 7) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 > To me it has a name. Genocide: the systematic EXTERMINATION of a race or > cultural group. > In my mind Danny is not an angel. They are a separate creation of God. > Spiritual beings created as pure spirit. Children with Down syndrome are JEAN: OMG...where did you come from??!!! You are truly AMAZING and INSPIRING with you choice of words. Are you a author??....if not, you should be. WOW!!!....you write thing so beautifully and I feel like I know you so well because you look upon so many of the issues that I do in the same way. I do not feel that is an angel either or that all (maybe some are but certainly not all) mothers are chosen to be mothers of " special " children, if that were true there would be no such thing as giving your child up for adoption, abuse, or even the extreme of murdering your own child. , mom to twins Nicala & ,ds (3) and (1) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 Hi Your messages are well-written, articulate, and I have to say " Amen " to what you have written. To expand on your comment, " Life in this world is hard for women " . Last week at the Congress I attended, one of the seminars I went to was presented by Rohr, entitled from " Boys to Men " . He spoke for an hour and a half, but one of the things he said that made a lot of sense to me was that women are more powerful in the areas of relationship and spirituality because of the pain and suffering they endure in this life. In some countries, boys are initiated to manhood by inflicting pain upon them at about 13 years old...it is like a rite of passage and what the intent to teach the boy is that (1). life is hard, (2) his mortality is made real, (3)that he is not the almighty boy he might think he is (4) that he is not in control and (5) that his life s not about him. Rohr, made it clear that those rites would not fly in the U.S., but he can really see the change in the boys when they go through these rites, as he has traveled extensively to other countries and has seen it first hand. According to Rohr, women learn the above lessons through childbirth, loss of children, etc. So what I gleaned from this message is that as a result of life being difficult for us, as women, we are transformed for the better. Marcia Mom to Sara (DS) and 5 and Lucas 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 No, I'm not an author, but I've always been able to organize my thoughts. I come from a life that has been filled with many extremes of sadness and joy. My main beleif is that the world and everything in it was created out of and for love. Love is pure and therefore accepts everything without protest, true to it's nature. That's why evil can exist. Love could eradicate it but it does not because destruction is against it's nature. So I can accept that bad things exist in this world, and remain loving, and try to stay balanced with that in mind. I read " When Bad Things Happen to Good People " (didn't everyone recommend that one to us?), and that helped me feel that I was not singled out or was not being punished for the difficulties that were part of my life. I love " Desiderata " , " The Prophet " , and the writings, rites and rituals of my formal religion. Have always had it, and am passing it on as a gift of love to my children as my mother did for me. I enjoy the music and lyrics of Browne, Bruce Springsteen, and Denver. Don't beleive in anything superstitious, fatalistic, or anyone or anything that claims it can predict my future. I steer clear of cliches. I've been a rotten person and a good person. But most of all I am a person who can choose how I react to all the things that have happened. I choose to take the high road. No matter how hard, it eventually brings peace and gives answers. In time. I try really really really hard not to judge. And it's hard. I don't call women who choose to end a pregnancy any name. I know women who have had the experience, and my heart has broken right along with theirs. I know women who have given up a child for adoption, and my heart has broken right along with theirs. I know women who have opted to have " selective reduction " , and I know at night they cry for the triplet or quad or quint that is not there. I know a woman whose son died before he weighed enough to have the life saving surgery he needed. I know a woman who lost triplets at 22 weeks, and this same woman went on to have 28 weekers. Her daughter died, her son lived. How is she supposed to feel on his birthday? Life is hard for women in this world. Always has been. It will never change. I have twins I love. I am alive. I am healthy. I am free. I am so lucky. Jean n and Danny's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 Wow I sure am glad I am moving to your neck of the woods. I try to remain positive and the easiest way I find is to always look to the future. This to shall pass. For instance, I was totally stressed not long ago about moving and now things couldn't be better. The company is paying for everything, sending a moving truck to pack my house, shipping one car...no insurance worries. I do believe in a power greater than myself and hope " it " will take care of me and my family. Thanks for the inspirational message. Re: Aborting babies with DS No, I'm not an author, but I've always been able to organize my thoughts. I come from a life that has been filled with many extremes of sadness and joy. My main beleif is that the world and everything in it was created out of and for love. Love is pure and therefore accepts everything without protest, true to it's nature. That's why evil can exist. Love could eradicate it but it does not because destruction is against it's nature. So I can accept that bad things exist in this world, and remain loving, and try to stay balanced with that in mind. I read " When Bad Things Happen to Good People " (didn't everyone recommend that one to us?), and that helped me feel that I was not singled out or was not being punished for the difficulties that were part of my life. I love " Desiderata " , " The Prophet " , and the writings, rites and rituals of my formal religion. Have always had it, and am passing it on as a gift of love to my children as my mother did for me. I enjoy the music and lyrics of Browne, Bruce Springsteen, and Denver. Don't beleive in anything superstitious, fatalistic, or anyone or anything that claims it can predict my future. I steer clear of cliches. I've been a rotten person and a good person. But most of all I am a person who can choose how I react to all the things that have happened. I choose to take the high road. No matter how hard, it eventually brings peace and gives answers. In time. I try really really really hard not to judge. And it's hard. I don't call women who choose to end a pregnancy any name. I know women who have had the experience, and my heart has broken right along with theirs. I know women who have given up a child for adoption, and my heart has broken right along with theirs. I know women who have opted to have " selective reduction " , and I know at night they cry for the triplet or quad or quint that is not there. I know a woman whose son died before he weighed enough to have the life saving surgery he needed. I know a woman who lost triplets at 22 weeks, and this same woman went on to have 28 weekers. Her daughter died, her son lived. How is she supposed to feel on his birthday? Life is hard for women in this world. Always has been. It will never change. I have twins I love. I am alive. I am healthy. I am free. I am so lucky. Jean n and Danny's mom ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Whatever you want, chances are you'll find it at one of the hundreds of sites in The PointClick Network--like Disney.com, eCost.com, FogDog.com and many more. You get paid as you shop and an additional 10% off any purchase, anytime. 1/2994/1/_/598201/_/955910918/ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://DSyndrome.com/Multiples Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 You're welcome, . I'm glad you're moving up to my neck of the woods, too. Now I've gotta go out and play in the dirt. Have to move those gorgeous Siberian Irises to a spot where they'll get the acclaim they deserve. :>) Jean Bren and Danny's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 > My main beleif is that the world and everything in it was created out of and > for love. Love is pure and therefore accepts everything without protest, > true to it's nature. That's why evil can exist. Love could eradicate it > but it does not because destruction is against it's nature. Jean; There you go again.....your amazing!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 16, 2000 Report Share Posted April 16, 2000 Marcia You know, it's so true what you say about the five points. Those were the EXACT things I learned through the death of my first child. It was the beginning of growing up for me. I vowed not to overprotect my boys after being so unprepared myself. I was so sheltered from the realities of adult life as a child. It's handicapping. n and Danny will have a lot to deal with. By giving them the truth in simple terminology I am empowering them. I answer what they ask. If they're old enough to ask, they're old enough for the true answer. I think being transformed for the better is definitely a matter of choice. Usually it's how I've dealt with things. In the movie Dances with Wolves, the name of the woman who refused to give up in difficult times was named " Stands with a Fist " . That's me. It's probably all of us in a sense.....it's like " Oh yeah, what are you going to throw at me next? Rather than hiding or running away or backing down we draw ourselves up to our full height and raise our fist to the next challenge. It's kind of interesting to me that one characteristic of children with Ds is that they are smaller. It signifies to me our need to stand even taller to protect and promote this child in the world. Jean n and Danny's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 17, 2000 Report Share Posted April 17, 2000 Kelli, I can't beleive your doctor suggested you to abort. Was this when he found out you were having twins and the age factor or had you had a test done. I guess I am in such shock because my OB Gyn Team are all so pro life. When they asked me if I wanted an amnio and I declined they said if anything would be wrong they wouldn't suggest for me to do anything about it anyway. When problems arose in an ultrasound later on they offered me an amnio but suggested that it was such a risk at that stage and these two babies would be born etc etc etc and an amnio wouldn't change the outcome anyway. They also prayed for us throughout my pregnancy. I always felt that they thought that everyone was here for a purpose, which is my exactly how I feel. Thank God I chose the team of compassoinate doctors that I did to get me through that pregnancy. I don't think I could have made it without them. mom to Landon (Ds) and Ashton 22 months hectichouse@... wrote: > Hi Pam, I know my little guy is n angel! And I have > never been around a > person so sweet, loving, hugable!,ect.... has > changed my life and > those in my family also. When I became pregnant with > and Tyler my > dr. was strongly suggesting I have an abortion > because of the increased > risk of downs. (I thought this guy was out of his > mind ) Like I told > him, I believed I was pregnant fo a reason (and not > just because I love > to fool around with my husband) but because it was > meant to be. I didn't > care if I had a child with downs and am so happy to > have . I would > love to have 20 of them! I don't understand how > anyone could end a > pregnacy because of this and those who do, wouldn't > have been fit to be > their mother. > > Kelli.... wife of Greg, mother to > ,Greg,April,Ash,(ds)and Tyler(age4), > friend of Dena,daughter > to Lynda, sister to Viki, Trasi,Rick and Jon. The > End > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 17, 2000 Report Share Posted April 17, 2000 I think this was beautifully said! I cannot agree with you more!!!!!!! And I couldn't have said it better myself. Sara --- scottjeanroberts <scottjeanroberts@...> wrote: > I'm jumping in on this one.....I think part of the > reason for such a high > rate of women choosing to terminate their pregnancy > is because the medical > community, in general, pushes the fact that this is > a problem. Down > syndrome is an abnormality that they want to > rectify. And since there is > not a cure, termination is looked upon as the > solution to the problem. I > feel this way very strongly. > Even in my own family. There is a subtle pressure, > even when I was younger, > after I'd had the boys, that I was not to reproduce > again. Really. Just > comments, and you didn't have to be paranoid to get > the meaning. " Be happy > with what you have. " " You have your hands full " . > " You have a nice little > family. " " You'd be crazy to have another " > Sometimes when I'm with Danny people give me funny > looks, sad looks, annoyed > looks. I used to think they were being judgemental, > but now I realize, they > may have made a decision to terminate a baby with Ds > and it's painful to > confront the dream that was taken from them. > I strongly feel that it is the medical community > that should be educated > about the humanity of people with Ds, not women. > There is too much pressure > on them already, and being morningsick and tired and > hormonal and possibly > under pressure from family, husband, doctors, > they're not in a position to > be strong and hold onto their pregnancies. They > might think they're being > selfish to keep the baby. > I have women call me through the hospital's genetic > counseling program. > They ask me question after question. I answer them, > and try to make them > and their pregnancy seem very important and very > valuable. I do not > pressure either way, although I have my definite > feelings about terminating. > To me it has a name. Genocide: the systematic > EXTERMINATION of a race or > cultural group. > In my mind Danny is not an angel. They are a > separate creation of God. > Spiritual beings created as pure spirit. Children > with Down syndrome are > humans, created differently, and born to this world > presenting challenges to > a generally spoiled and indulged society. They are > a reality check. They > have lessons to teach for those open to learn. > Patience. Acceptance. > Overcoming medical crises. And if raised in love, > the love they are so > talented in giving back is the best I've ever > encountered in my life. > But so much is lost in this throw away society. > There are groups you can > join on the net for this issue. We have our > children so obviously we made a > choice to accept or were surprised with the birth of > a different child. But > among us there may also be people who chose > differently on another occasion. > I never judge. I just beleive in encouraging women > to see their pregnancy > as theirs. And no one has a right to take it away. > Jean > n and Danny's mom (age 7) > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Win $1000 at eGroups! > Enter " $1000 Fridays " at: > 1/2862/1/_/598201/_/955897803/ > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > http://DSyndrome.com/Multiples > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 17, 2000 Report Share Posted April 17, 2000 , After I had April and Ash (my first set) he said it would be a good idea to concider not having anymore children. It was a real hard pregnancy and I had a hard time with delivery. Which at that time was fine was fine with me. I already had 4 children and didn't want anymore. I was quite surprised when I found out I was pregnant with the boys, As a matter of fact I had took a pregnancy test after all the kids and my husband left for work that day. I really thought I was going through early menopause or something but in the back of my mind I had a nagging feeling that ,that was not the case. When I took that test and it showed I was pregnant I must have sat in the bathroom for hours just crying. I was 36 and April and Ash were 11. I didn't want to do the baby thing again. I wasn't getting along with my husband real well and was thinking at that time of asking him for a divorce, then this,I never belived that new babies helped a failing marriage. I told my husband a couple weeks later. He was so excited and I was so scared to do it again. My dr. put me on home mointering and bed rest for the last 5 months. (it was awful). My husband was great through all of it and he has been a wonder ever since. We were real shocked about all the medical problems with the boys at first but you do get into the swing of things real quick! Especially the hospital runs...I'll never understand why my dr. suggested aborting but that wasn't a choice for me. After I delivered a few other dr. came in and told us they were testing for ds.My dr. came in that evening to see how I was feeling and I told him about . He said to me, I'm so sorry to hear that............I have never went back to him since or another one for that matter. i sometimes have a problem with what is it that everyone is so sorry for? I'm so glad now that I did get pregnant and didn't ask my husband for that divorce, he's my best friend and the boys are great little guys,they are so cute. Well so much with all my writing. Take care Kelli.... wife of Greg, mother to ,Greg,April,Ash,(ds)and Tyler(age4), friend of Dena,daughter to Lynda, sister to Viki, Trasi,Rick and Jon. The End Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2000 Report Share Posted April 18, 2000 scottjeanroberts wrote: > > > No, I'm not an author, but I've always been able to organize my thoughts. I > come from a life that has been filled with many extremes of sadness and joy. > My main beleif is that the world and everything in it was created out of and > for love. Love is pure and therefore accepts everything without protest, > true to it's nature. That's why evil can exist. Love could eradicate it > but it does not because destruction is against it's nature. > So I can accept that bad things exist in this world, and remain loving, and > try to stay balanced with that in mind. > I read " When Bad Things Happen to Good People " (didn't everyone recommend > that one to us?), and that helped me feel that I was not singled out or was > not being punished for the difficulties that were part of my life. I love > " Desiderata " , " The Prophet " , and the writings, rites and rituals of my > formal religion. Have always had it, and am passing it on as a gift of > love to my children as my mother did for me. I enjoy the music and lyrics > of Browne, Bruce Springsteen, and Denver. Don't beleive in > anything superstitious, fatalistic, or anyone or anything that claims it can > predict my future. I steer clear of cliches. I've been a rotten person > and a good person. But most of all I am a person who can choose how I react > to all the things that have happened. I choose to take the high road. No > matter how hard, it eventually brings peace and gives answers. In time. > I try really really really hard not to judge. And it's hard. > I don't call women who choose to end a pregnancy any name. I know women who > have had the experience, and my heart has broken right along with theirs. I > know women who have given up a child for adoption, and my heart has broken > right along with theirs. I know women who have opted to have " selective > reduction " , and I know at night they cry for the triplet or quad or quint > that is not there. I know a woman whose son died before he weighed enough > to have the life saving surgery he needed. I know a woman who lost > triplets at 22 weeks, and this same woman went on to have 28 weekers. Her > daughter died, her son lived. How is she supposed to feel on his birthday? > Life is hard for women in this world. Always has been. It will never > change. > I have twins I love. I am alive. I am healthy. I am free. I am so > lucky. > Jean > n and Danny's mom > > OK, wait a minute. you are soo articulate, I love to read your words. You are very uplifting to me! And I always seem to be so low these days. Can you write for this group once a week? I'm not kidding! Maybe I'm asking for selfish reason's, or maybe I'll just keep this post right here in front of me for a while. Wish I was as strong as you, I'm mush these days Gail ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Whatever you want, chances are you'll find it at one of the hundreds > of sites in The PointClick Network--like Disney.com, eCost.com, > FogDog.com and many more. You get paid as you shop and an additional > 10% off any purchase, anytime. > 1/2994/1/_/598201/_/955910918/ > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > http://DSyndrome.com/Multiples Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2000 Report Share Posted April 18, 2000 Gail I'm going to have to be strong again, I think. I'll write once a week. Sure. I think I may bore people, so I am a reluctant writer. but once i get going, sometimes i can't stop. thanks for your nice compliment. you guys keep me going. Jean B & D's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 18, 2000 Report Share Posted April 18, 2000 Gail I'm going to have to be strong again, I think. I'll write once a week. Sure. I think I may bore people, so I am a reluctant writer. but once i get going, sometimes i can't stop. thanks for your nice compliment. you guys keep me going. Jean B & D's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 19, 2000 Report Share Posted April 19, 2000 I agree in everything you said and also agree with all the comments the other moms made about you. That's why I like this list and even I don't have a lot to share because I haven't experience all those ones most of you have, is nice to know we make are part of that small and brave percent who love and care very much about our beautiful down syndrome kids. Once I read I was very upset and cried for all those kids who didn't make it because of their parents but then I think about this list and our kids and that was is more important. Mabel, mom to Carolina, Cristian, a-ds 13 months >From: " scottjeanroberts " <scottjeanroberts@...> >Reply-Multiples-DSegroups ><Multiples-DSegroups> >Subject: Re: Aborting babies with DS >Date: Sun, 16 Apr 2000 11:11:51 -0400 > >I'm jumping in on this one.....I think part of the reason for such a high >rate of women choosing to terminate their pregnancy is because the medical >community, in general, pushes the fact that this is a problem. Down >syndrome is an abnormality that they want to rectify. And since there is >not a cure, termination is looked upon as the solution to the problem. I >feel this way very strongly. >Even in my own family. There is a subtle pressure, even when I was >younger, >after I'd had the boys, that I was not to reproduce again. Really. Just >comments, and you didn't have to be paranoid to get the meaning. " Be happy >with what you have. " " You have your hands full " . " You have a nice little >family. " " You'd be crazy to have another " >Sometimes when I'm with Danny people give me funny looks, sad looks, >annoyed >looks. I used to think they were being judgemental, but now I realize, >they >may have made a decision to terminate a baby with Ds and it's painful to >confront the dream that was taken from them. >I strongly feel that it is the medical community that should be educated >about the humanity of people with Ds, not women. There is too much >pressure >on them already, and being morningsick and tired and hormonal and possibly >under pressure from family, husband, doctors, they're not in a position to >be strong and hold onto their pregnancies. They might think they're being >selfish to keep the baby. >I have women call me through the hospital's genetic counseling program. >They ask me question after question. I answer them, and try to make them >and their pregnancy seem very important and very valuable. I do not >pressure either way, although I have my definite feelings about >terminating. >To me it has a name. Genocide: the systematic EXTERMINATION of a race or >cultural group. >In my mind Danny is not an angel. They are a separate creation of God. >Spiritual beings created as pure spirit. Children with Down syndrome are >humans, created differently, and born to this world presenting challenges >to >a generally spoiled and indulged society. They are a reality check. They >have lessons to teach for those open to learn. Patience. Acceptance. >Overcoming medical crises. And if raised in love, the love they are so >talented in giving back is the best I've ever encountered in my life. >But so much is lost in this throw away society. There are groups you can >join on the net for this issue. We have our children so obviously we made >a >choice to accept or were surprised with the birth of a different child. >But >among us there may also be people who chose differently on another >occasion. >I never judge. I just beleive in encouraging women to see their pregnancy >as theirs. And no one has a right to take it away. >Jean >n and Danny's mom (age 7) > ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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