Ian and Pathfinder

[Guest guest]

Hi,

He's there now. We took him on Wednesday, spent some time with him getting

his stuff unpacked and his room in order, showing him where his things are

and all his new things. Then we walked with him to the school, where he met

his teacher and his four classmates. It was almost lunchtime, and they were

breaking to walk over to the dining hall. Ian didn't want to go, because he

knew that's when we would say goodbye. We walked with him part of the way,

but when we passed his house, he ran into it. We went in to say goodbye to

him there, and left.

I cried all the way home. I cried all night. They told us that the first

night would be the worst, and it was. In the middle of the night, I went to

his room and wrapped myself in his blanket, just so I could smell his smell,

and I sobbed. The next day, I kept myself very busy, but when I wasn't

busy, I couldn't think of anything but him.

We've spoken with his aide, his house manager, the social worker, the

teacher, the principal, over the course of these two days. He's okay. He's

had some sad times, mostly at night, but he's participating, he's behaving,

he's eating, he's talking. So far, so good. I've sent him email and a

package, and I get to see him on October 4th.

This is truly the most difficult thing I have ever gone through, and that

includes the deaths of my father and best friend. I have to keep telling

myself that this is the best opportunity for *him*, and that my pain isn't

as important as his future. I'm a grownup, and I can deal with it. Isn't

this what parents do -- put themselves out to benefit their children?

Two days down, 27 to go.

CK,

Mom to Ian (2/89),

(9/90),

and Rose (6/94)