Guest guest Posted October 3, 2006 Report Share Posted October 3, 2006 There was a woman beaten to death in my kitchen. I hear weird stuff all the time. My dog hears it. My mother even heard it when she visited. Don't know what that says about me - I've been here 5 years - I guess it says I don't have money to move!!!! LOL ; ) Willow --- Charlotte Robbins <TaintedTears102@...> wrote: > Just in case you have forgotten the " rules " for a > safe and > Happy Halloween. This hysterical!) : > > 1. When it appears that you have killed the > monster, > NEVER check to see if it's really dead. > > 2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, > even as a joke. > > 3. Do not search the basement, > especially if the power has gone out. > > 4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any > other > language which they should not know, shoot them > immediately. > It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. > However, it will probably take several rounds to > kill > them, so be prepared. > This also applies to kids who speak with somebody > else's > voice. > > 5. When you have the benefit of numbers, > NEVER pair off and go it alone. > > 6. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that > open > portals to Hell. > > 7. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or > crypt. > This would apply to any other house of the dead as > well. > > 8. If you're searching for something which caused > a loud > noise and find out that it's just the cat, GET THE > HELL > OUT! > > 9. If appliances start operating by themselves, do > not > check for short circuits; just get out! > > 10. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead. > > 11. If you find a town which looks deserted, > there's > probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look > around. > > 12. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology > unless > you're sure you know what you're doing. > > 13. If you're running from the monster, expect > to trip > or fall down at least twice. Also note that, despite > the > fact that you are running and the monster is merely > shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to > catch up > with you. > > 14. If your companions suddenly begin to > exhibit > uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, > fascination for > blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so > on, kill > them immediately. > > 15. Stay away from certain geographical > locations, > some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm > Street, > Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you > recognize > this one), the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town > in > Maine. > > 16. If your car runs out of gas at night on a > lonely > road, do not go to the nearby deserted looking house > to > phone for help. If you think that it is strange > because you > thought you had half of a tank, shoot yourself > instead. > You are going to die anyway, and most likely be > eaten. > > 17. If you find that your house is built upon a > cemetery, now is the time to move in with the > in-laws. This > applies to houses that had previous inhabitants who > went > mad or died in some horrible fashion, or had > inhabitants > who performed satanic practices in your house. > > > Medicine is sky high. I got one prescription that > says, > " Take one capsule as often as you can afford it. " > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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