Guest guest Posted January 7, 2006 Report Share Posted January 7, 2006 SERENA EDWARDS <pushcrash@y...> wrote: > I think you totally missed my point. I was comparing the poor judgement and failure to operate a modicum of survival skills to certain facets of addictive behavior. The commonality isn't addiction. It's the inability to distinguish a threat to one's survival and to act accordingly because a toxin is acting on one's body and altering one's ability to sense and reason. > Yes! As you describe, the phenomenon of idiopathic denial is so peculiar as to be quite noticeable. Even people with vast options refuse to exercise them and act in counterproductive ways that seem to have no explanation. I suspect this is because mentally accepting the reality of the situation is such a paradigm shift that it is a loss comparable to the death of loved one. The way people move through this process of variously acting in accordance with the needs of the situation and then backsliding into former behaviors is exactly like the stages of Grief - with a small steps moving forward and then regressing through levels of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. It takes a lot of mold slams before arriving at " acceptance " of this crap. - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 7, 2006 Report Share Posted January 7, 2006 , I agree with you and Serena. In addition to the stages of grief for losses, I also see an often frantic attempt to adjust to an abrupt alteration of reality. The frantic part is usually a sudden and strong denial of any change. Think about the fundamentals of reality. They include what is safe, what is secure, what can be relied on to SURVIVE. When reality shifts " too much " so what is assumed and not thought about has to now be thought about, how does one know they aren't actually crazy? Especially when everyone around them says their experience is the same as always? Isn't this the basis for horror movies and the old Mission Impossible TV shows? This is an incredibly complex issue. When the overall impact is great enough it goes straight to the core of what we believe is safe and what is not. While in that transition, we are extremely vulnerable because the old is no longer strong enough to protect us (by denial) and the new is still to weak to prevail. Carl Grimes Healthy Habitats LLC ----- > SERENA EDWARDS <pushcrash@y...> wrote: > > > I think you totally missed my point. I was comparing the poor > judgement and failure to operate a modicum of survival skills to > certain facets of addictive behavior. The commonality isn't addiction. > It's the inability to distinguish a threat to one's survival and to > act accordingly because a toxin is acting on one's body and altering > one's ability to sense and reason. > > > Yes! > As you describe, the phenomenon of idiopathic denial is so peculiar as > to be quite noticeable. Even people with vast options refuse to > exercise them and act in counterproductive ways that seem to have no > explanation. > I suspect this is because mentally accepting the reality of the > situation is such a paradigm shift that it is a loss comparable to the > death of loved one. The way people move through this process of > variously acting in accordance with the needs of the situation and > then backsliding into former behaviors is exactly like the stages of > Grief - with a small steps moving forward and then regressing through > levels of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. > > It takes a lot of mold slams before arriving at " acceptance " of this > crap. - > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2007 Report Share Posted September 3, 2007 Carol, I don't have any background in psychology or its related fields....but it just seems so clear that these are the stages most of us go through, one way or another. (I also have come to think if you skip a stage you will probably still have to do it eventually.) I just have wondered how the process of grieving for a loved one relates to accepting this huge challenge for a second time in our lives? Is it grief or mourning for some aspect of ourselves that is not to be....a physically well human being? Is it the same when someone deals with the reality of a new debilitating condition arising? Is it worse for us because we already stood at the " brink " as teens and then were told we were " fixed? I know that in the end it may not matter ....perhaps it's just an interesting aside. I just know that in our years here together the hallmarks of these two types of journys have struck me as uncannily similar....it would be nice to know more about what it means for our mental well being as patients. Looking back I think that DrRand knew when I first saw him that I was somewhere between denial and bargaining and knew enough to build some time into my decision. At the time I thought I was getting a little patronizing doctoring....you know.... " go educate yourself about the condition, this isn't an emergency... " because on one hand I would have loved it at that moment if he had just said " you need surgery ASAP and you will good as new the day after " . Alas, we all know that getting your mental game ready is as much as the physical preparations.....but would I have been served better if my surgeons had just said so? Don't know...but I think it is one role that this group has taken on for it's members and I think it's very helpful. So, thanks for sharing what you found. Take Care, Cam Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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