Re: Re: DONNA - Brought the baby home...

[Guest guest]

Anela, you are not asking too much of your hubby when you ask for help - it's his responsibility to pitch in. When I had my first and second children, my macho hubby took 1 - 2 weeks off to help me with the babies. He really enjoyed changing diapers, etc.

Tell your hubby he can relax when you are in better shape! Sorry I have an edge in this message, but you are the one that needs to relax during your surgery recovery period!

{{{Hugs}}}

Kathy

Re: DONNA - Brought the baby home...

Aloha Donna,There are times that he does help me with the baby, he feels that I should take care of the baby more than he does. Don't get me wrong, he does help out with the baby, just that when he doesn't want to be bothered, I have to leave him alone. I still continue to ask for help no matter what, but I know that it gets annoying at times, which he does show that he is annoyed when I ask for help too much. I have gone to the hospital to check up on my pains. My doctor said that I'm doing okay, that most of the pain is normal healing pain. But there is a slight rip in my incision that is slowly healing. I've been going to the hospital for that and have to continue my visits until it's fully healed. I know that I'm not reading too much into his body language. He does complain to me about him having to do too much right now. That he doesn't like when I constantly ask him for help. That he needs time for himself to just relax. I just wish that I could let him do that, but I do need the help and I know that I'm being too much of a bother. I just wish that I was in better shape so that I would be able to do things on my own, without having to get my husband upset at me, for asking him to help me out with things. Well I'd better run, it's very early in the morning and I need rest for yet another long day ahead of me. You take care and god bless.much aloha, Anela> Hi Anela,> Take a baseball bat out and hit your husband over the head! He NEEDS to > help you, you just had major surgery, please don't feel like you're > bothering him, if he acts like he's being bothered just ignore it and > continue to ask for help. Birth is hard enough to recover from and a > c-section/surgery is even harder!! Also, please check out your incision > pain -- I made the mistake after my daughter was born of ignoring a growing > and severe case of mastitis (breast infection) and it turned into a MAJOR > deal. I was inches away from being hospitalized and put on IV antibiotics > ---as it was I had to have outpatient surgery to clear out the infection --- > it was AWFUL. So better safe then sorry.> > (((((HUGS))))))) to you and best wishes for a speedy recovery and a happy > holiday season!!> > Donna> >> >> >Aloha Donna,> >> >I am trying my best to relax, it's just that there are times when my> >husband doesn't find that I need the help. He feels as if I'm good> >enough to do the normal things that I have been doing before our> >sons birth. When I ask him to help me, I can see it in his body> >language that he doesn't want to help me at all. So I feel that I> >don't want to ask him, because I don't want him mad at me for> >asking. I feel like going to the hospital and saying please, I'm> >not feeling good(which I'm not right now, I've been having a lot of> >pains around my incision). Then maybe they'd admit me and I'd be> >able to heal properly. Though I know that I can't just do that to> >my family...I'd feel really bad...but it seems as if I'm not healing> >the way that I should. Other than that, I do try my best to rest as> >much as I can and when my husband says "go relax, I got it."> >Okay, before I do write too much, thanks for the encouragement. I> >do appreciate everyone being supportive. I hope that you have a> >great christmas. Take care and god bless.> >> >much aloha, Anela> >