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RE: Backsliding

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I have backslided badly since last Friday and have been eating the

exact fatty crappy foods that caused Carl to get sick in the first

place. I can't quite grasp why I'm doing this

Fatty foods are often known to be "comfort foods" and it makes perfect sense why you would be bingeing on them right now. I don't think you should beat yourself up over it. It's temporary and you won't be doing that forever. You simply need to heal emotionally and adjust to all these changes going on in your life.

Gloria

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Tracey, ;You'll get back on track - don't be yourself up over it right now... I will be wire transferring you soon.. am waiting on 1 or 2 more checks. Suzirainbowegret <egret.09@...> wrote: Hi EveryoneJust thought I'd let you all know that I'm doing OK for the situation I'm in. Have some good and hard times and I'm not sleeping really good have trouble going to bed. I get really tired but just can't go to bed I suppose after having someone there for 10 years you've got to except that. Carl and I are Soul Mates so it will take some time.Kids are doing OK too but they are becoming a big handful for me they are mucking up a lot and making a mess too.We are looking for another house closer to Carl's family because I have been spending a

fortune on petrol to go see them a few times per week. Found a house am just waiting for an answer and my current landlord has to let me break the lease we have here.I have backslided badly since last Friday and have been eating the exact fatty crappy foods that caused Carl to get sick in the first place. I can't quite grasp why I'm doing this. I know I'm doing it and I keep saying we have to stop but we are stuck in a vicious cycle that hopefully I can come out of very soon before I put on weight again and do myself damage.BlessingsTracey

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Tracey sweetheart don't be so hard on yourself. You are eating comfort foods and it is understandable. Can you try just once a day to make a substitute for a healthier choice? Just one time will do for a start. Yes, gas (petrol) is a horrible expense here too. It seems all the expenses add up so fast.

Can you try sleeping in another location? Moving the bed to another spot? Change something so it will be a little different. Carl will always be there, but you need to find a way to break the mold so it is not a crushing pattern for you.

Blessings to you too. I have been worrying about you.

Gayla Always Enough RanchAcampo, Californiahttp://bouncinghoofs.com/alwaysenough.htmlBill Barnhill is our Rainbow Example!aeranch@...

----- Original Message -----

From: Suzanne

health

Sent: Wednesday, August 16, 2006 7:32 PM

Subject: Re: Backsliding

Tracey,

;You'll get back on track - don't be yourself up over it right now... I will be wire transferring you soon.. am waiting on 1 or 2 more checks.

Suzirainbowegret <egret.09@...> wrote:

Hi EveryoneJust thought I'd let you all know that I'm doing OK for the situation I'm in. Have some good and hard times and I'm not sleeping really good have trouble going to bed. I get really tired but just can't go to bed I suppose after having someone there for 10 years you've got to except that. Carl and I are Soul Mates so it will take some time.Kids are doing OK too but they are becoming a big handful for me they are mucking up a lot and making a mess too.We are looking for another house closer to Carl's family because I have been spending a fortune on petrol to go see them a few times per week. Found a house am just waiting for an answer and my current landlord has to let me break the lease we have here.I have backslided badly since last Friday and have been eating the exact fatty crappy foods that caused Carl to get sick in the first place. I can't quite grasp why I'm doing this. I know I'm doing it and I keep saying we have to stop but we are stuck in a vicious cycle that hopefully I can come out of very soon before I put on weight again and do myself damage.BlessingsTracey

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Hi Gayla

Thanks Gayla I'm doing OK I'm a pretty strong person Carl always told me and others that I was the strongest woman he knew and my friend said that I am a mirror of Carl and he was a very strong man.

It's only been 3 weeks tomorrow and I know that my strong sense of spirit is helping me heaps. Carl is around just need to adjust from the physical to the spiritual connection. I know we are forever linked spiritually it will just take time to heal the initial trauma of his sudden death.

I'm still eating fruit everyday and I always start the day with fruit and end with fruit and smoothies. It's just the in between times that I slip.

Trying to get myself away from the fatty stuff and just have steamed veges and rice, pasta etc when I want cooked foods.

I have alreaady put on 7 lb in a week all my new summer clothes I just got out of laybye will not fit me soon if I don't stop <g>.

I don't want to move or change anything. I don't think about not wanting to go to bed but I am getting a few solid hours each night. I will be alright.

Hugs

Tracey

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I have faith in your strength Tracey. Just remember it is not disloyal to go on with your life. You are an incredible person. I am glad to have had the opportunity to know you a little.

((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))) from across the ocean.

Gayla Always Enough RanchAcampo, Californiahttp://bouncinghoofs.com/alwaysenough.htmlBill Barnhill is our Rainbow Example!aeranch@...

----- Original Message -----

From: Rainbow Egret

health

Sent: Thursday, August 17, 2006 5:14 PM

Subject: Re: Backsliding

Hi Gayla

Thanks Gayla I'm doing OK I'm a pretty strong person Carl always told me and others that I was the strongest woman he knew and my friend said that I am a mirror of Carl and he was a very strong man.

It's only been 3 weeks tomorrow and I know that my strong sense of spirit is helping me heaps. Carl is around just need to adjust from the physical to the spiritual connection. I know we are forever linked spiritually it will just take time to heal the initial trauma of his sudden death.

I'm still eating fruit everyday and I always start the day with fruit and end with fruit and smoothies. It's just the in between times that I slip.

Trying to get myself away from the fatty stuff and just have steamed veges and rice, pasta etc when I want cooked foods.

I have alreaady put on 7 lb in a week all my new summer clothes I just got out of laybye will not fit me soon if I don't stop <g>.

I don't want to move or change anything. I don't think about not wanting to go to bed but I am getting a few solid hours each night. I will be alright.

Hugs

Tracey

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This too shall pass; after my dad died I don’t

know what I ate the first few weeks honestly. You never get over a loss like

this, but in time the sad and despairing thoughts turn to happier ones. Keep

plugging away and do the best you can. You and the kids will be OK.

Janet

From: health [mailto:health ] On Behalf Of rainbowegret

Sent: Wednesday, August 16, 2006

5:58 PM

health

Subject:

Backsliding

Hi Everyone

Just thought I'd let you all know that I'm doing OK for the

situation I'm in. Have some good and hard times and I'm not sleeping

really good have trouble going to bed. I get really tired but just

can't go to bed I suppose after having someone there for 10 years

you've got to except that. Carl and I are Soul Mates so it will take

some time.

Kids are doing OK too but they are becoming a big handful for me

they are mucking up a lot and making a mess too.

We are looking for another house closer to Carl's family because I

have been spending a fortune on petrol to go see them a few times

per week. Found a house am just waiting for an answer and my current

landlord has to let me break the lease we have here.

I have backslided badly since last Friday and have been eating the

exact fatty crappy foods that caused Carl to get sick in the first

place. I can't quite grasp why I'm doing this. I know I'm doing it

and I keep saying we have to stop but we are stuck in a vicious

cycle that hopefully I can come out of very soon before I put on

weight again and do myself damage.

Blessings

Tracey

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