Re: Re: my treatments - Missy-jenny

[Guest guest]

thank you so much for your caring advice, it means so much to me that i have caring friends in here! i will keep you all posted on how im doing,

thank you all so very much for being here for me,

love missy

From: Crouch <lucky2b916@...> Sent: Fri, November 12, 2010 4:48:44 PMSubject: [ ] Re: my treatments - Missy

Missy:I haven't been posting in awhile because I've been taken off the meds for the second time -- and I'm having computer issues at home so my access is limited to work. But your story prompted me to take the time to respond (while I'm at work).1. Listen to the others; love should never hurt like that. I've been through it all -- get out as soon as you can and don't look back. You have to think about you now and getting better -- and that man is going to do nothing but drag you down at a time when you are going to need all your strength just to survive. Yes, we do hurt when we love when there are reasons to hurt like serious illness, death, job loss, etc. But we should never, never, hurt because someone loses control of their emotions.2. You are 42. My sweet, young thing ... you have so much more life to live. Like Don, I am 60 and alone. I (we) adopted three children from Russia when I was 44. Life was good. But then I had to make a

decision five years ago to divorce my husband because he loved alcohol more than he loved me and the children -- and losing us was not enough to make him change. He lost everything and then he lost his life. Yes, it is scary to be alone but living in hell is much worse than being alone. I was finally beginning to feel like myself again after the years of abuse -- I have even met a guy who I thought I might could spend the rest of my life with -- when I was diagnosed with Hep C. Fortunately, because we live very far apart and I don't see him often, and because I'm not sure what I am facing with possible treatment -- I haven't had to tell him about the Hep C. I will cross that bridge when/if I have to. Right now, I'm grateful for the distance. And if it isn't meant to be with him, there may be someone else -- or I may find that I am perfectly happy being with my friends.Believe me, there is life after divorce/separation, and love can be found at

any age. I have been ready to tackle this dragon for almost a year now, because I have the mental capacity to it. I am physically strong and work out regularly when the meds aren't slowing me down, but apparently internally by body isn't ready for the war. So I don't know what may lay ahead with treatment. I'm trying to get with another doc in Nashville who may have another approach. In the meantime, I'm doing what I can with herbs, good foods and trying to stay physically strong. I may have to live with Hep C for awhile -- which may scare away potential partners -- or it may not. But you need to be able to fight this battle both mentally and physically and the relationship you are in will not allow that. Please listen. Even if you were not sick, the advice would be the same. Do not stay in a hurtful relationship. Yes, they always say they are sorry and act remorsefully -- but until they do something to change themselves, they are not going to change.

You cannot change him -- only he can make that decision. And right now, he is more concerned about himself that he is you. Take care of yourself. Pack your bags, move in with your loving daughter and never look back ... you have a lot of living left to do ...Been there, > > > From: Kasselman <magick_willow@...>> Subject: [ ] my treatments + controlling husband> > Date: Thursday, November 11, 2010, 9:18 PM> > > > > > > > > > > > > hello group,> sorry i havent wrote for a while, well i've deceided to leave my abusive husband and go stay with my daughter and her husband while i go through treatment, I thought long and hard about

it and i know it's for my best interest in leaving my husband behind. i still love him an might always love him, but however he has clearly not shown me real love, not the kind of love a person deserves, he would tell me loves, be all lovey dovey and i'd start to become very happy with us and life, then baaammmm! he'd do something to knock me down and make me cry everytime! damn him i was so angry at him tonight because he will belittle me, then get me upset in tears the whole nine yrds over this past weekend, then he comes home from work everynight acting like nothing happen, he doesnt talk to me though but he'll call his buddies and be laughing and carring on, and talken about getting together this weekend with them, he doesnt even bother to come up to me and tell me> he's sorry, he simply dont give a shit, he knows i'm getting my liver biopsy next week and i'll be starting treatment soon, but he is so selfish and self centered all he

cares about is himself and it hurts so much because i always would fall for his fake phoney love he would pretend to give me. just last weekend he was so great, passionate, romantic and very helpful around the house and telling me that he wants to take care of me while i go through treaments, i dont understand how someone can be so cruel. i've been sleeping in the living room! can u believe that? and i pay the damn rent too! have been since we moved in in april, he didnt have a job at the time, now he has a job but blows his money doesnt give me any for the damn rent and bills, talk about a low life scum, then he has the nerve to kick me out of MY bedroom! he says it's his apartment, yet i pay for everything! I just cant do this anymore, i have to be emotionally right be before i> start treatment, so i'm going to forefit my apartment and go live with my daughter, they are very supportive and love me very much, i am so happy to have such a loving

daughter and son n law to help me through this. although it sadens me to think about my husband not being there for me, i dont understand why it hurts me so much the things he does to me i mean why do i still care for this man? he's been physically abusive and verbally for yrs now, how could i still love a man for choking me? and holding me down on the bed and shoving his middle finger up my nose twisting it until it popped and blood gushes out? what in the hell is wrong with me, i should have left him a long time ago, now my self esteem is so damn low, i feel like shit, like my chances for love, true love is lost forever, i'm 42 and i fear i'll be by myself for the rest of my life. with this damn illness who knows how long life's going to be!> i am so sad and confused, i just hate feeling like this guys, i feel like a little girl again, it really sucks, i want to love myself and take care of myself >

missy>