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Peggy

Yes, it was an attachment because I have it in a Word folder & I don't know any

other way to send it.

PLEASE READ

, I could`d read whatever you sent because it was an attatchment.

PeggyOur Message Boardhttp://www.voy.com/21568/Check out these great Molds!!http://soapwerks.com/martinworld.htmMember Kae's Site... Awesome oil Prices!http://www.olivetreesoaps.com/All posts to this list are copyrighted by post author. They may NOT be forwarded, copied, or used in anyway without the permission of the post author with the exception of answering posts to this list. Posts are personal opinions only.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest guest

hi peggy,

i do think that the level of ur illness has slowed down your

response as u guessed.(+ between ur book , groups,lists, and everything u are

well versed in this illness)

someone had me on some bovine celluar material (not sure how it compares to

fetal bovine growth factors that cheney uses) .This altenative md told me at

the beginning that i was so badly sick, too many years, my repsonse time

would take double or triple the time of the less sicker patients ....( am

hard core, long term treatment resistant patinet )

furthermore, i would need to be on some kind of maintenace dosage of

it for a few months every year for the rest of my life even if i got

appreciablty better....

unfortunately, he never did have time to correct my overwhelmingly Th2

response thinking that the bovine celluar material would ultimately do that.

.... and he isnt practicing anymore so i am lost who or where to go

to...cannot go to dr cheney ...

but maybe i will follow his stuff thru his videos and the transcrips online

....

dont know too many cfids mds doing this kind of stuff ..

** anyone u can suggest other than dr cheney?

keep on trying... if u been really badly sick many years, gonnna take

extra time to unravel /correct this mess.(i know it sounds obvious)

thanx for all ur wonderful additions to this list ..hope ur book sold well.

somish

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  • 6 months later...

Peggy

That's great that your husband does it. I am SO sick of all the junk

mail that I get. I am definitely going to start doing this and give these

companies a taste of their own medicine.

The other idea she had forwarded was for telemarketing sales calls.

It said when you get them to just say " Hold on one second " and set

the receiver down and don't come back to the phone until you hear

the sound that they've hung up and your phone is off the receiver.

I'm going to pull that one, too. I don't get as many as I used to since

I signed up for that list in NYS that is supposed to keep you off the

telemarketing lists. But still some sneak through and it irritates me.

Re: What a great idea

, my husband does this all the time! Hecrams as much junk mail as

he can into the post-paid envelopes and mails them back. Our name is

no where on it so they don`1t know who sent it!

Peggy

> My daughter forwarded this to me and I loved it. In fact, I think

I'm going to start

> doing it. What do you think?

>

>

>

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  • 2 months later...

>>>I lived in a place with Lyme disease when I got sick, and was even dating

someone with Lyme then, so I have always thought about it, but tests have

been negative thus far.

Thanks --

Peggy>>>

Where did you live? There are places where lyme exists and places where its

really epidemic. If you lived somewhere where there's a lot of it; like New

York, Jersey, Ct, or some other places like parts of northern CA even if

tests are negative you might want to try abx; but definitely from an LLMD or

someone who who has experience with chronic lyme. Its a hard decision to

make. its all experimentall at this point.

best wishes...

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  • 3 weeks later...

That is a sad one Peggy. You are right though, no matter what country,

state, province, municipal system, things are much the same.

I got my annual Christmas laugh again this year thanks to Canada Post.

Hazel received the annual " thank you for your hard work during the year "

form letter again. I break out laughing every time.

+Dave

---

Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.

Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).

Version: 6.0.443 / Virus Database: 248 - Release Date: 10/01/2003

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  • 1 month later...

Thanks for that info, Peggy. Where did you buy yours from,

just out

of curiosity? I hunted for hours on the internet and ended

up buying

mine from Chandlers Soaps. It was the cheapest price I could

find plus

she only charges $6 S/H no matter how much stuff you order.

Re: Labeling question

, I sell 2oz. malibu tubes of lotion and scrub and there is

plenty of room for labeling. I use the smallest font on my program

but you can still read it!

Peggy

>

>

>

>

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  • 1 month later...
Guest guest

,

Thank you for your support, I kind of feel like April 21st is almost

like finding out the destiny of her life, it's pretty scary.

On Saturday, April 5, 2003, at 11:39 PM, Falconer wrote:

> Hi Peggy, here catching up on my emails. I've just read about

> your two little ones and thought how similiar they are to my own two,

> in that the eldest is IgA deficient , and the second child is a more

> complicated case.

> Hope you get some answers from the blood work results you are waiting

> on,

>

> , mum to (7) and (5), both with pids

>

>

>

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  • 1 month later...
Guest guest

- If you could have seen him, you would have thought it was a

miracle that he could eat anything that day. He could no longer talk,

only way to communicate with him was to look directly into his face and

watch for his nod or shake to indicate Yes & No. He couldn't feed

himself any longer - the breakfast was hand fed to him by the caregiver.

Yes, he had a special diet specified by Dr. - modified

vegetarian using organic foods - and he adhered to it 100% until the

last hospitalization. His bile duct was blocked and he had to have a

shunt put in - thus the reason for hospitalization the last week of his

life. I don't think it would have mattered what he ate at that point.

Dr. thought the procedure might allow him to get back on the

regimen again and still held out some hope for it to work. The

conventional doctors had been telling us for months that he might die at

any time - we were used to disregarding what they said. So in spite of

the evidence right before our eyes that he was dying, his actual death

was still a shock. We believed in the protocol that much.

We've looked back many times and wondered if it was the right course to

take. But with pancreatic cancer, there was really no one offering

anything else.

I'm sorry you lost your friend and at such a young age. One thing about

people like my FIL and your friend, they leave a legacy behind, their

influence remains and even in their absence, we find comfort for having

known and loved them.

God help and bless us every one....

Peggy

szukidavis@... wrote:

> In a message dated 5/12/03 9:52:33 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

> pdurant@... writes:

>

>

> > As well as one of the most

> > righteous - he didn't just preach it - he lived it. As much as he

> > suffered, he was concerned more about his caregivers than he was

> about

> > himself.

> >

> > We miss him so.

> >

>

> Peggy..Didn't Dr. give your FIL a special diet? It doesn't

> seem that

> cream of wheat, toast and orange juice would be the best breakfast for

> a

> person fighting cancer.

> I am sorry that Dr. didn't pick up on what else was ailing

> your FIL.

> From what I understand, the cleaner the body the better the chance of

> fighting cancer.

> When your FIL got an infection, something like ozone might have been a

> better

> choice than anti-biotics. Maybe they inter-reacted poorly with the

> other

> pills he was taking. I am especially curious to know what the exact

> cause of

> death was.

> >From the way you describe your FIL you were very fortunate to have

> known him

> during the time he was alive. I lost a dear friend 2 years ago to

> aggressive

> breast cancer. She was only in her 30's and she was one of those

> unusual

> people, like your FIL that touches everyone in a special way. She was

> like

> an angel on earth...and she made more of a difference in her short

> lifetime

> than most people do who live into their 80's and 90's. I feel her

> around me

> a great deal of the time. Having known her has made me a better

> person. Not

> a day goes by when I don't remember her in some way.

> It is terribly sad when people we love and respect leave us. I am

> sorry for

> your loss. If you need to " talk " then please feel free to contact me

> privately.

> Regards,

>

>

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Guest guest

- If you could have seen him, you would have thought it was a

miracle that he could eat anything that day. He could no longer talk,

only way to communicate with him was to look directly into his face and

watch for his nod or shake to indicate Yes & No. He couldn't feed

himself any longer - the breakfast was hand fed to him by the caregiver.

Yes, he had a special diet specified by Dr. - modified

vegetarian using organic foods - and he adhered to it 100% until the

last hospitalization. His bile duct was blocked and he had to have a

shunt put in - thus the reason for hospitalization the last week of his

life. I don't think it would have mattered what he ate at that point.

Dr. thought the procedure might allow him to get back on the

regimen again and still held out some hope for it to work. The

conventional doctors had been telling us for months that he might die at

any time - we were used to disregarding what they said. So in spite of

the evidence right before our eyes that he was dying, his actual death

was still a shock. We believed in the protocol that much.

We've looked back many times and wondered if it was the right course to

take. But with pancreatic cancer, there was really no one offering

anything else.

I'm sorry you lost your friend and at such a young age. One thing about

people like my FIL and your friend, they leave a legacy behind, their

influence remains and even in their absence, we find comfort for having

known and loved them.

God help and bless us every one....

Peggy

szukidavis@... wrote:

> In a message dated 5/12/03 9:52:33 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

> pdurant@... writes:

>

>

> > As well as one of the most

> > righteous - he didn't just preach it - he lived it. As much as he

> > suffered, he was concerned more about his caregivers than he was

> about

> > himself.

> >

> > We miss him so.

> >

>

> Peggy..Didn't Dr. give your FIL a special diet? It doesn't

> seem that

> cream of wheat, toast and orange juice would be the best breakfast for

> a

> person fighting cancer.

> I am sorry that Dr. didn't pick up on what else was ailing

> your FIL.

> From what I understand, the cleaner the body the better the chance of

> fighting cancer.

> When your FIL got an infection, something like ozone might have been a

> better

> choice than anti-biotics. Maybe they inter-reacted poorly with the

> other

> pills he was taking. I am especially curious to know what the exact

> cause of

> death was.

> >From the way you describe your FIL you were very fortunate to have

> known him

> during the time he was alive. I lost a dear friend 2 years ago to

> aggressive

> breast cancer. She was only in her 30's and she was one of those

> unusual

> people, like your FIL that touches everyone in a special way. She was

> like

> an angel on earth...and she made more of a difference in her short

> lifetime

> than most people do who live into their 80's and 90's. I feel her

> around me

> a great deal of the time. Having known her has made me a better

> person. Not

> a day goes by when I don't remember her in some way.

> It is terribly sad when people we love and respect leave us. I am

> sorry for

> your loss. If you need to " talk " then please feel free to contact me

> privately.

> Regards,

>

>

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  • 7 months later...
  • 1 year later...

Here's hoping that the time frame you describe will be my timeframe in 2005! So

true

about how much information is on this board -- I intend to send my MD a note

this

weekend with a copy of some of the articles -- Thanks for your feedback. I am

hearing

loud and clear that getting this treated early has a better outcome than

waiting. I am for

that.

Peggy

> Hi Peggy!

>

>

>

> Welcome to the group! I hope you are reading some back posts. They

> will give you so much information, some of which your doc may not even

> know, or share with you. Please read and take in as much as you can.

> It might seem like a lot, but it will be totally worth it!!!!! If you

> could post where you are from, someone may be able to recommend their

> team of doctors for you.

>

>

>

> I was diagnosed with A last January. I had the lap surgery Sept 29/04

> and feel sooooooo good. I can't stress it enough. I was so fed up with

> life up until that point. It was frusterating on the best of days.

>

>

>

> *1. Does anyone else have a history of Irritable Bowel Syndrome (a

> motility disorder of a different sort) and how does this disorder

> (especially flare ups) affect problems with the esophagus?*

>

>

>

> I don't have IBS. but I believe there are members who might. someone

> will reply, I am sure.

>

>

> *2. How has this disorder -- with nighttime regurg and coughing --

> impacted the quality

> of sleep and how does that impact your life? Any suggestions for

> managing energy?*

>

>

>

> I was lucky in the nighttime regurging department. I only had a few

> nights where I woke up choking. The last few weeks before my surgery, I

> slept with a " husband pillow " (as Cindi calls them!). It is that pillow

> with the arm thingy's. It seemed to help, but was not too comfortable.

> I also slept with that pillow after surgery for a few weeks. I couldn't

> lie flat right away.

>

>

> *3. Did anyone else's onset start with what appeared to be the WORST

> heartburn ever --

> such that it felt like my whole esophagus was injured? That happened to

> me several times

> -- very scarey and then swallowing difficulties slowly started

> developing over the next six months.*

>

>

>

> About 6 months (maybe more) I was having horrible " hearburn " . I went to

> the docs about it, and was told that due to my age (20 at the time) that

> there was no way it could be heartburn. He told me to watch my diet,

> and see what happens. No otc meds worked for the heartburn. Usually,

> I'd have to drink my way out of it. (with water, and milk ;)) When

> diagnosed with achalasia 6 months later. I totally had to wonder if that

> heartburn was associated with it. I am sure it is. Now, when I have

> these same pains, I know that it is " just " a spasm, and not heartburn.

> They are similar in pain for me, but more of a pressure thing, not acid.

> I never have an acid taste in my mouth, and since prevacid, pepto, and

> the like don't work, I've ruled out heartburn. My surgeon agrees that

> they are spasms, and not heartburn. Many achalasia " sufferers " have

> spasms. Many different things work for different people, usually just

> not all the time!

>

>

>

> *4. Do the women who have this disorder notice symptoms seem to get

> worse just before

> their menstrual periods and then calm down when flow starts (sorry,

> gentlemen!)*

>

>

>

> Personally, I have never linked my period with any worse symptoms.

> Again, many other women have. I can think of a few off the top of my

> head. If you wait for a while. I am sure a few of them might chime in!

> :-)

>

>

>

>

>

> I hope this can help you somewhat. If you have any other questions,

> just post! There are sooooo many other people who are in this group who

> were exactly where you are, and are here to help! Take care, and keep

> posting!

>

>

>

>

>

> 21

>

> Chilliwack, BC

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  • 4 weeks later...

Don't tell me I crack you up or I'll keep trying. I was always too

afraid to watch " Wizard of Oz " , but Peggy had said something earlier

about they were messing around with the wrong person. I visualized

the one part of " Wizard of Oz " I saw briefly when the bad witch

turned into a puddle of mud or something. Peggy shared w/ me a

letter she sent to this doctor before her appointment and I imagined

she would turn the doctor into a puddle like that witch.

Didn't our group turn into a pistol? People like that give us

strength to question our doctors.

Several years ago I told an oncologist he was a condescending SOB and

to never speak to me again that way. Then tears started streaming

down my face. Need to learn to not burst into tears afterward as

that ruins the whole effect. I heard later he often asked if I was

pleased with the referrals he had given, so maybe he learned

something as he was well known for being condescending. Hope to

never see him again, regardless.

About ice cream.... turns to luke warm froth, not even very good

after surgery. Cookies were the best when I was at my worst. Just

plain sugar cookies.

> I'm the only one my GI has ever seen with A. And I have a good

friend who

> is a surgeon and he has spoken very highly of this GI....he is the

best in

> the area.

>

> Unless he is at a swallowing disorders clinic, I think the others

are right.

> ...he has an ego as bigger than a mega-esophagus. Cindi

>

> PS - Sandy, you are cracking me up

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Let's hope he is saying " I'mmmm meltingggg.. " as he is writing my referral! He

is going to

put my referral in, says " we'll see " about what the higher authority UM says

because he

provides all these services at his practice. Thanks for all the morale boosting

-- I am

indeed empowered by this fine group of people.

> > I'm the only one my GI has ever seen with A. And I have a good

> friend who

> > is a surgeon and he has spoken very highly of this GI....he is the

> best in

> > the area.

> >

> > Unless he is at a swallowing disorders clinic, I think the others

> are right.

> > ...he has an ego as bigger than a mega-esophagus. Cindi

> >

> > PS - Sandy, you are cracking me up

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Hi Peggy,

I havn't been keeping up with all the 'A' threads so I apoligize if I am repeating info that is not important to you. Here is my story in short form: I suffered from 'A' for over 3 years before I had the Heller Myotomy with Stomach Wrap. All I can say is this..... Ever since my surgery I have gotten my life back!!!! I can eat, drink and burp again!!!! I feal so blessed. I was at a point before my surgery were I had lost 30 pounds and had to sleep in the barka lounger at night because I had started to choke on my own salavia. Sorry if this is too much info...

I finally got throught test were they put the tube through your nose and monitor your motility. When I had my surgery I had 3 doctors. 1 to perform the myotomy, 1 to perform the stomach wrap and another to use a scope looking down my throat to make sure there were no perforations.... I had all this done is sdale Arizona. If you or any one else needs good people I can easily refer them

God bless... Tom

-------------- Original message from "Peggy Cordero" <pegster@...>: -------------- Let's hope he is saying "I'mmmm meltingggg.." as he is writing my referral! He is going to put my referral in, says "we'll see" about what the higher authority UM says because he provides all these services at his practice. Thanks for all the morale boosting -- I am indeed empowered by this fine group of people. > > I'm the only one my GI has ever seen with A. And I have a good > friend who> > is a surgeon and he has spoken very highly of this GI....he is the > best in> > the area. > > > > Unless he is at a swallowing disorders clinic, I think the others > are right.> > ...he has an ego as bigger than a mega-esophagus. Cindi> > > > PS - Sandy, you are cracking me up

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Alas, no classic bird beak, thus manometry is needed. I had upper GI only --

they were

afraid to go further, for fear of further clogging me up with barium.

> Peggy - did you have a Timed Barium Swallow? If so, was there a " Bird's

> Beak Esophagus " ?

>

> If so, some doctors (once you have had an endoscopy to rule out cancer,

etc....) will NOT

require manometry. Is that what you are waiting on? Just wondering. I know it

is " gold

standard " to require manometry, particularly if your case is not " classic " . But

if you do

show the " Bird's Beak " , you are most likely " in the club " . Cindi

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Hi Peggy,

I am a bit confused [normal some days!] How can they do an upper GI and not

have the barium go into the rest of your oesophagus - and down into your

stomach? It's usually a 'one-way street ' if you know what I mean ! If they

had waited a bit and taken shots of the whole of your E it should have

showed up enough.

Is your LES so closed that nothing goes through?

Hugs,

Joan

Re: Peggy

>

>

> Alas, no classic bird beak, thus manometry is needed. I had upper GI

> only -- they were

> afraid to go further, for fear of further clogging me up with barium.

>

>

>> Peggy - did you have a Timed Barium Swallow? If so, was there a " Bird's

>> Beak Esophagus " ?

>>

>> If so, some doctors (once you have had an endoscopy to rule out cancer,

>> etc....) will NOT

> require manometry. Is that what you are waiting on? Just wondering. I

> know it is " gold

> standard " to require manometry, particularly if your case is not

> " classic " . But if you do

> show the " Bird's Beak " , you are most likely " in the club " . Cindi

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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When they took the picture, the barium filled up my esophagus, the fizzy stuff

just

complicated things and slightly dilated in the lower two-thirds of my eso, but

it took

more than 30 minutes for it trickle through my LES to my stomach enough for

" sub-

optimal " xrays of my stomach. They were going to do a video espohagram and a

barium

tablet swallow procedures as well, but were afraid the barium would get me

obstructed

since it was so slow in passing through. The radiologist asked, are you

choking? I said

nope, feels like it always feels! I could have told them what would happen

before it did.

Picture showed moderate dilation and a sharp narrowing at my LES, but no bird

beak.

When I tried to use water to flush the barium through -- I regurged every effort

for two

hours before it finally cleared my LES. I thought it would never go through.

Hope I cleared it up.

P.S. It is clear from your astute responses on this board that you are rarely

confused!

> >> Peggy - did you have a Timed Barium Swallow? If so, was there a " Bird's

> >> Beak Esophagus " ?

> >>

> >> If so, some doctors (once you have had an endoscopy to rule out cancer,

> >> etc....) will NOT

> > require manometry. Is that what you are waiting on? Just wondering. I

> > know it is " gold

> > standard " to require manometry, particularly if your case is not

> > " classic " . But if you do

> > show the " Bird's Beak " , you are most likely " in the club " . Cindi

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

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Thanks Peggy ! I now know what happened - and even though you say there was

no bird's beak I am willing to guess that you will have one in due course if

they don't sort out the LES. I can sympathise with you on the choking with

the barium story - they gave me a piece of bread soaked in barium - it was

at lest 1 and a half inches long and told me to swallow it ! I told the tech

she was mad and then had to chew it up before I could swallow any of it -

just love the taste of barium ! My LES only opens about a half an inch and

it also took long to regurge the stuff when I got home.

Oh Well - I would rather have a barium meal than a manometry so I won't

complain too much.

Joan

Re: Peggy

>

>

> When they took the picture, the barium filled up my esophagus, the fizzy

> stuff just

> complicated things and slightly dilated in the lower two-thirds of my

> eso, but it took

> more than 30 minutes for it trickle through my LES to my stomach enough

> for " sub-

> optimal " xrays of my stomach. They were going to do a video espohagram

> and a barium

> tablet swallow procedures as well, but were afraid the barium would get me

> obstructed

> since it was so slow in passing through. The radiologist asked, are you

> choking? I said

> nope, feels like it always feels! I could have told them what would

> happen before it did.

>

> Picture showed moderate dilation and a sharp narrowing at my LES, but no

> bird beak.

>

> When I tried to use water to flush the barium through -- I regurged every

> effort for two

> hours before it finally cleared my LES. I thought it would never go

> through.

>

> Hope I cleared it up.

>

>

> P.S. It is clear from your astute responses on this board that you are

> rarely confused!

>

>

>> >> Peggy - did you have a Timed Barium Swallow? If so, was there a

>> >> " Bird's

>> >> Beak Esophagus " ?

>> >>

>> >> If so, some doctors (once you have had an endoscopy to rule out

>> >> cancer,

>> >> etc....) will NOT

>> > require manometry. Is that what you are waiting on? Just wondering.

>> > I

>> > know it is " gold

>> > standard " to require manometry, particularly if your case is not

>> > " classic " . But if you do

>> > show the " Bird's Beak " , you are most likely " in the club " . Cindi

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

>> >

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So true -- manometry -- which I am facing again, is so tough.

> >> >> Peggy - did you have a Timed Barium Swallow? If so, was there a

> >> >> " Bird's

> >> >> Beak Esophagus " ?

> >> >>

> >> >> If so, some doctors (once you have had an endoscopy to rule out

> >> >> cancer,

> >> >> etc....) will NOT

> >> > require manometry. Is that what you are waiting on? Just wondering.

> >> > I

> >> > know it is " gold

> >> > standard " to require manometry, particularly if your case is not

> >> > " classic " . But if you do

> >> > show the " Bird's Beak " , you are most likely " in the club " . Cindi

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

> >> >

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  • 1 month later...
Guest guest

Hi Pegg, I guess thats what you might call denial, which I have been

trying very hard to do. But I guess I need to face reality, and

tomorrow after my second opinion I'll probably have to start facing

this head on. Thanks for your input, what you said is very true!

in WA

>

> It seems to me the tricky psychological issues of achalasia and our

efforts to

> connect to each other in this forum can be comparing and

contrasting who

> has it worse, e.g. if you have it worse, does that really mean

that I really don't

> need this surgery and can I get by with other means. Or is it

really true A?

>

> Funny how our minds and hearts work.

>

> Peggy

>

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  • 1 month later...
Guest guest

Some of the " action " they saw was my regurging the sips of water they made

me drink after the water didn't clear my esophagus and my gag reflext took

over! LOL -- Peggy AKA will they never learn....

They got a great reading and they

> were all set aflutter to see achalasia in action!

>

> This cracked me up.......more like NOT IN ACTION! :)

>

> So glad you are getting this take care of and all is going well! Keep keeping

us posted. Cindi

>

>

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  • 3 months later...

Hello Sonet,

As absurd as it was ... every night i felt that I had to TRY to eat

something solid, and of course, it resulted in frequent visits to the

bathroom. I think it is just that even we can't believe this works

like this! How can we explain it to others, when even we can't

understand!

You are not too long now. In just a few weeks, hopefully this will all

just be a nightmare ... that is over!

Kathie in Pittsburgh

>

This > disease is funny, last week I thought Oh I don't need surgery, I

am ok, and this week I feel aweful and wish it was tomarrow.

Sonet

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Thanks -- her email really struck a chord!

Peg

> > Last week I [finally] took a trip from Detroit to the Cleveland

> > Clinic and met with Dr. Falk to review my current 'A' status and

> > treatment plan.

> >

> > From the moment I confirmed my 2pm appointment and discovered that I

> > needed to arrive by 8:30am for a endoscopy followed by a manometry

> > AND a timed barium swallow, I knew the end result might not be good.

> > You see, I really just wanted confirmation that my local GI's were

> > doing the right thing for me and that I didn't have to make any

> > changes. I mean, I've had this disease for 25 years and multiple

> > dilations and Botox injections later, I am 40+ pounds over weight,

> > can eat anything I want to [before 8pm] and have learned to tolerate

> > the constant pain through my chest and back. Why change success?

> >

> > Because, it turns out, I'm NOT successful at managing this condition.

> > My E looks like a woolen sock inside my chest. It has more than

> > tripled in size since the last barium test I remember (1982) and the

> > LES pressure at fully open is greater than desired normal closed

> > pressures should be. In fact, Dr. Falk looked at me and was amazed

> > that I am as healthy as I am [read: FAT!] because he was surprised

> > any food was getting through at all.

> >

> > Long story short, he called right over to Dr. Rice's office and upon

> > discovering " TR " was in, sent me and my x-rays over for an immediate

> > consult. I'm scheduled for a " Lap w/wrap " Heller on September 28th,

> > arriving for the pre-op on the 27th and, hopefully, being released

> > from CC and allowed to go home on Friday.

> >

> > So last week I told my kids and my friends and my co-workers and

> > requested paperwork for a medical leave and thought the worst was

> > behind me momentarily. What I don't understand is WHY I cannot

> > seem to get past this and get things organized so that I can go into

> > surgery with a clean conscience. I'm convinced that this is the

> > right thing to do. I know that I'll be more tolerant of the surgery

> > now than when I am older. I know that I'd like to prolong my E as

> > long as possible and TRY to keep it forever, even if it is JUST a

> > CHUTE.

> >

> > Logically, I know it's not my fault that my GI wanted Botox, he's the

> > expert, not me. I know that it is not his fault that I have found

> > this group and learned of other medical professionals more

> > experienced than him in dealing with A. But I cannot seem to get

> > past the feeling that I have some how failed myself in not getting

> > this treatment sooner. I cannot concentrate on work, help prepare for

> > the garage sale that is starting Thursday in MY GARAGE(!), enjoy the

> > new hot tub which was filled for the first time yesterday, or support

> > my daughter who is leaving for her freshman year in college in 11

> > days. I'm a wreak.

> >

> > I read the posts on this site and know that there are so many of you

> > who have and do suffer much more than I ever have. I know that I am

> > lucky. But I still feel like there is a cloud hanging over me. AND I

> > feel terribly about wantaing/needing to whine about it.

> >

> > So. Thank you for letting me vent.

> > For sharing your experiences and for encouraging me to stay the

> > course and hang on until the 28th.

> > Thank you for NOT saying 'I told you so' on the Botox thing (I really

> > DID think it was working for me).

> > For sending me your personal advise on what I really need to know

> > about the surgery, recovery and getting through the next seven weeks.

> > And Thank you for the reference to TCC because without that

> > information, I wouldn't be taking this next step to long-term E

> > survival.

> >

> > , Michigan

>

>

>

>

>

>

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  • 1 month later...

In a message dated 9/23/05 10:55:25 AM Mountain Daylight Time,

SSRI medications writes:

> He was literally writhing in his chair

> working himself up into a sexual frenzy. He thinks its perfectly OK

> to fantasize about this women but have sex with me. If I reject him

> this just justifies why he should be with her.

GET AWAY!!!!!!!

" All the truth in the world adds up to one big lie. "

~ Bob Dylan ~

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