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Denial vs Acceptance

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Beth,

Your talk of commuting anywhere while you are in such a delicate state of recovery after having such a huge surgery is just ludicrous.  I don't know how you were able to make it home.  I was amazed at how many detailed/descriptive responses that were directed at you to slow down & rest.

They even helped to remind me of just how intricate our procedures really were & how even at nearly 4 months, it is difficult & exhausting healing - trying to grow bone.  It really hits you right between the eyes & forces you to slow down.

My appointment with Dr Rand went well.  He was concerned & stunned  when I told him of your travel troubles.  He was also surprised to hear you hadn't reported the theft.  My incision continues to improve and the X-rays showed that everything was where it was supposed to be.  He said he wants to see me in a month.   After that we could go to three months.  At least that is easier than the weekly car trips into Boston!  Then we could go 6 months.  At around a year, he said we would get a CT Scan to see how the fusion was coming along.

The old scars over both hip crests continue to cause pain which is probably caused by the nerve endings.  Also, I continue to have problems with leg/ankle edema.  Pain is definitely my motivator to keep it slow and take it easy.   My new PCP is managing my post-op and fibromyalgia/arthritis/chronic pain, and so far (aside from the travel distance) I am quite happy with him.  I still require the walker to stabilize my walking.  I know when I have overdone it.   My body gets so stiff that I can hardly move and I just fall asleep while trying to read/write an email.

I too have trouble with sleep patterns.   When I got home from rehab,  I was sleeping better than I had in a long time. Then the honeymoon was over.  I was up every 2-3 hours again.  I think we Just have to stop trying to over-analyze everything.   No one ever died from a lack of sleep.  But I think we would be pretty miserable if we had gone through all this only to find that the fusion hadn't healed and we needed more surgery.

I don't think the pain doc cutting your meds so soon helped with your sleep problems or your post-op pain management.  I believe that's the only reason you were able to make it home.

We are not alone in this journey.  Though our revisions may be slightly different,  we have similar experiences & are here to support and help each other.  I was doing my mall walk with my husband & it wasn't going well when you left the voicemail.  I am sorry I missed your call.

Don't forget, I am usually up till at least midnight (sometimes 2am) so if you ever need to chat...

Don't worry, everything will be OK, it just takes time & prayer.

Rest easy and often, Robin

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