A Year and a Month

[Guest guest]

I haven't written an update in awhile, so it seems a natural time to

capture my last check-up with Dr Rand and close out the year.

If you have been reading along you know that I have had a good

recovery so far (if you haven't, and are interested, the log from

the last year is in the files section). I am not experiencing any

pain, at least no pain that I attribute to my surgery specifically.

I am turning 50 this June, so of course I have various parts of my

body that resist my attempts to maintain my weight and

figure….walking, swimming…anything that can challenge my muscles and

joints can make them ache or be sore…but generally it's what I

consider nuisance pain and it goes away in a day or so. There is one

spot along my spine where I can feel a hard spot that can make the

overlying muscle a little tender when I am active and I have to

reach around and give a little massage to ease the tension. Dr Rand

says it is possible that over time the muscle can kind of work away

from the implant and they can become more prominent….but at this

point it is not something that rises to the level where we would

even think about doing anything about it. Good. So far no trouble

with the sacral implants…if one gets a little tender is has always

resolved after a rest.

I did ask Dr Rand why he thought I have had less pain than others.

Although he says there may be something to attitude and the way I

deal with pain, he says that generally he sees the best results when

dealing with straightforward degenerative discs… basically that the

decompression gets the pain. So I guess I understood that stenosis

or more significant scar tissue may play a role in the ability to

really clear up residual pain. I guess I should count my lucky

stars, right?!!

I had the usual x-rays as well as a CAT scan at this visit. The scan

is done to better assess how the bone is growing in. Dr Rand thinks

the fusion is nice and solid, but did say we have to await the

radiologist report. It is kind of hard for me to see what he is

talking about looking at the films to be honest…I can see the shades

of grey where he says the fusion is coming together….but to me…well,

it reminds me of looking at a baby's ultrasound….I can never detect

things like arms or legs on them….

At this point Dr Rand says it is unlikely that I could pull an

implant out and can continue to work on strength and flexibility a

bit more aggressively. I have been a little nervous up until now

that I could do more harm than good by going the extra little bit…

but now I will be a bit more confident while doing my exercises.

In general, looking back, the surgery has been all I expected. Not

really better/easier or worse than I had been led to believe…but

certainly having the understanding and mindset that this really is a

year to a year and a half of recovery has been very helpful in not

expecting too much too soon. Yes, it is possible to go back to work,

take care of the kids, go to events fairly early on….but it was a

good long while until I felt strong and comfortable in my own body.

Now, the things that I had to think through have become second

nature. It doesn't surprise me anymore that I stop and evaluate the

necessity of getting something low or on the ground. I consider

before I try to get down if I can consolidate the jobs I need to do

while I am there…for instance…if I am going to get on my knees and

reach into cabinets, is there also a spot on the floor nearby that

needs wiping up?...if so I will grab a towel before I get down so I

can get a " twofer " . I pack grocery bags so that they are not so

heavy that they will pull me forward while I carry them.

Slowly, my stretch and reach has improved. I can shave with a little

extension on the blade. I can attend my own feet. I can balance and

step into pants without much trouble.

I can drive and have gotten much better at using mirrors than I ever

did before. Lifting my left leg when getting into the drivers side

has almost returned to normal, although I can still detect a

weakness in the muscles. In short, I feel like I am now way ahead of

where I was even 6 months ago…so it is really true that you

shouldn't get disappointed to early with your progress.

I have continued to set goals. Right now I am focusing on continuing

my swimming program and I would like to increase my distances from ½

mile 3 times a week to closer to a mile, also 3 times a week. I

probably can't up my distance too much until my retirement this June…

but it is a goal. My other goal is to continue to increase my

stretching ability. I feel so much better when I swim and then

stretch that I am encouraged to feel I can do more. Of course, I

love looking at the pictures of Ellen Kiley with her leg 45deg. from

her body. Sure, it is unlikely I will ever get " there " , but I know

if I never try, I definitely will never accomplish more. So. You

gotta set goals.

My life is my own. My scoliosis does not own me or define me,

although it certainly has created challenges and learning

opportunities that my family and I have had to deal with.

For me, they are easier challenges than many people have had to deal

with in many ways. I still have all my limbs and organs and for the

most part…they are all working. I have had an early preview of " old

age " and have had the chance to learn how I must arrange my life so

it can accommodate the loss of flexibility and mobility almost every

person must deal with. So yes, it is a kick in the pants to remember

that " use it or loose it " is the order of the day… maintaining

fitness must be a big part of my life plan. So too with maintaining

a good weight. So does living in a home and area that are

accommodating to my specific needs. An easy floor plan in my home

with spaces arranged to minimize lifting and bending are and will

always be important. No complaints. There is no sign that I have

been singled out for a particularly arduous life…just one that has

the same joys and sorrows as most people I know.

It's a year and a month, and I guess I have survived.