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Re: hey, I'd stick up for any one of you all -- Support Groups

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I'd also like to remind everyone that words in print naturally come across

" harder " than in speech. When we write an opinion we are " hearing " ourselves

saying the thing. Readers don't have the benefit of hearing the implied

tone.

A little while back, I learned in a seminar on listening that most of our

communication is done with our eyebrows and other facial expressions. The

next most important tool is the tone -- the WAY in which the words are

spoken. Lastly, are the actual words.

If you then add that: 1.) some people (like Francine) have English as a

second language and 2.) we're often dashing out the door and can't check our

words and 3.) we become so interested in making our point that we lose the

gentle nature of our purpose and 4.) maybe most important, we're all sick

(and frustrated!) here.

It just seems we ought to give everybody the benefit of the doubt, kindly

" read between the lines " . The most important thing for a Support Group

message board is to be Supportive. Especially with a subject of digestive

disorders and depression, this is a place where people who are shy or

reluctant to speak up should be able to, above all, feel totally comfortable

asking questions they can't ask others in their social circle. And writing

skills shouldn't need to be stellar to be understood in the best possible

light.

We're not always at our best here on this board. Sometimes I wish the words

I write could scream into space with the frustration I feel about being

sick. I assume others feel that way and that's why this board is such a

loving place.

~Robin

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On Tue, 27 Jul 2004, Robin Reese wrote:

>

[snip]

> If you then add that: 1.) some people (like Francine) have English as a

> second language and 2.) we're often dashing out the door and can't check our

> words and 3.) we become so interested in making our point that we lose the

> gentle nature of our purpose and 4.) maybe most important, we're all sick

> (and frustrated!) here.

>

[snip]

>

> We're not always at our best here on this board. Sometimes I wish the words

> I write could scream into space with the frustration I feel about being

> sick. I assume others feel that way and that's why this board is such a

> loving place.

>

> ~Robin

That's for sure. I've been on my restricted diet for just about 4 months

now. At first, I didn't think I could stand to stay on it very long; now

I'm actually getting used to it. And I'm starting to do better but still

feel I have a ways to go and that gets frustrating a bit. You definitely

need patience with a malady like candida.

I still get frustrated with the " brain fog " . I never needed to use a list

when going to the grocery store before. Last night, not only did I feel I

needed a list to remember what I needed from the store, I left a couple

things off the list and forgot them anyway. Grrr! :-)

I have an aunt who recently had cancer. She went to stay with one of my

cousins halfway across the country. I understand that while she was in

the hospital, she was a terror. I've never known her to be that way.

Fortunately, she's recovered for now and is coming back to this area soon.

Zack

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Dear Zack,

>>>>I still get frustrated with the " brain fog " . I never needed to

use a list when going to the grocery store before. Last night, not

only did I feel I needed a list to remember what I needed from the

store, I left a couple things off the list and forgot them anyway.

Grrr! :-)

===>I hear ya Zack. It's very frustrating. I think I started

my " infamous lists " 18 years ago when I had candida. I got into the

habit and now I don't have to use my brain to remember (it's much

less taxing so it may have benefits in the end). I make lists for

everything. Just as long as I can find my lists. lol! :)

>>>>I have an aunt who recently had cancer. She went to stay with

one of my cousins halfway across the country. I understand that

while she was in the hospital, she was a terror. I've never known

her to be that way.

===>I've heard of that happening to others who are suffering. They

go totally out of character. I think it is quite okay to be a terror

at a time like your aunt had. She was fighting for her life and

probably being manhandled by the doctors and nurses. It's tough to

be ill. That's when we need understanding and a safe place to vent

our frustrations without fear of reprisal or of being judged.

>>>>Fortunately, she's recovered for now and is coming back to this

area soon.

That's great she's recovered Zack.

Take good care,

Bee

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Y'know I used to be afraid of being stopped for shoplifting. Wandering round a

shop knowing I had come for something in particular, not knowing what the divil

it was.Being a lady of a certain age as well added to this. Now I always write

it down.

Lesley

[ ] Re: hey, I'd stick up for any one of you all --

Support Groups

Dear Zack,

>>>>I still get frustrated with the " brain fog " . I never needed to

use a list when going to the grocery store before. Last night, not

only did I feel I needed a list to remember what I needed from the

store, I left a couple things off the list and forgot them anyway.

Grrr! :-)

===>I hear ya Zack. It's very frustrating. I think I started

my " infamous lists " 18 years ago when I had candida. I got into the

habit and now I don't have to use my brain to remember (it's much

less taxing so it may have benefits in the end). I make lists for

everything. Just as long as I can find my lists. lol! :)

>>>>I have an aunt who recently had cancer. She went to stay with

one of my cousins halfway across the country. I understand that

while she was in the hospital, she was a terror. I've never known

her to be that way.

===>I've heard of that happening to others who are suffering. They

go totally out of character. I think it is quite okay to be a terror

at a time like your aunt had. She was fighting for her life and

probably being manhandled by the doctors and nurses. It's tough to

be ill. That's when we need understanding and a safe place to vent

our frustrations without fear of reprisal or of being judged.

>>>>Fortunately, she's recovered for now and is coming back to this

area soon.

That's great she's recovered Zack.

Take good care,

Bee

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Dear Lesley,

>>>>Y'know I used to be afraid of being stopped for shoplifting.

Wandering round a shop knowing I had come for something in

particular, not knowing what the divil it was.Being a lady of a

certain age as well added to this. Now I always write it down.

===>I know what that's like. It can make one look suspicious eh? I

have even absentmindedly walked out of the store with something in my

hand and didn't realize it. When it has happened someone was kind

enough to ask whether I intended to buy it, rather than just

arresting me. lol!

Bee

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