Guest guest Posted August 18, 2000 Report Share Posted August 18, 2000 The following letters are reportedly taken from an actual incident between a London hotel and one of its guests. The hotel ended up submitting the letters to the London Sunday Times. > > > > > > Dear Maid, > > Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my > bathroom > > since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six > > unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and > another > > three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way. > > Thank you. > > S. Berman > > > > > > Dear Room 635, > > I am not your regular maid. She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from > > her > > day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you > > requested. The six bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put > on > > top > > of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. This > > leaves > > only the three bars I left today which my instructions from the > > management > > are to leave three soaps daily. > > I hope this is satisfactory. > > Kathy, Relief Maid > > > > > > Dear Maid - I hope you are my regular maid. Apparently Kathy did not > > tell > > you about my note to her concerning the little bars of soap. When I > got > > back to my room this evening, I found you had added three little > Camays > > to the shelf under my medicine cabinet. I am going to be here in the > > hotel for two weeks and have brought my own bath-size Dial, so I won't > > > need those six little Camays, which are on the shelf. They are in my > way > > when shaving, brushing teeth, etc. > > Please remove them. > > S. Berman > > > > > > Dear Mr. Berman, > > The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this morning that > you > > called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid > > service. I > > have assigned a new girl to your room. I hope you will accept my > > apologies > > for any past inconvenience. If you have any in future please contact > me > > so > > I can give it my personal attention. Call extension 1108 between 8AM > and > > 5PM. > > Thank you. > > Elaine Carmen > > Housekeeper > > > > > > Dear Miss Carmen, > > It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for > > business at 7:45 AM and don't get back before 5:30 or 6PM. That's the > > reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night. You were already off duty. > > I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those little > > bars > > of soap. The new maid you assigned me must have thought I was a new > > check-in today, since she left another three bars of hotel soap in my > > medicine cabinet, along with her regular delivery of three bars on the > > > bathroom shelf. In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little bars > of > > soap. > > Why are you doing this to me? > > S. Berman > > > > > > Dear Mr. Berman, > > Your maid, Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your > > room > > and remove the extra soaps. If I can be of further assistance, please > > call > > extension 1108 between 8 AM and 5PM. > > Thank you, > > Elaine Carmen, > > Housekeeper > > > > > > Dear Mr. Kensedder, > > My bath-size Dial is missing. Every bar of soap was taken from my > room, > > including my own bath-size Dial. I came in late last night and had to > > call > > the bellhop to bring me four little Cashmere Bouquets. > > S.Berman > > > > > > Dear Mr. Berman, > > I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen, of your soap problem. > I > > cannot understand why there was no soap in your room since our maids > are > > instructed to leave three bars of soap each time they service a room. > > The situation will be rectified immediately. > > Please accept my apologies for the inconvenience. > > L. Kensedder > > Assistant Manager > > > > > > Dear Mrs. Carmen, > > Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room? I came in last > > night > > and found 54 little bars of soap. I don't want 54 little bars of > Camay. > > I > > want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial. Do you realise I have 54 bars > of > > soap in here? All I want is my bath-size Dial. > > Please give me back my bath-size Dial. > > S. Berman > > > > > > Dear Mr. Berman, > > You complained of too much soap in your room, so I had them removed. > > Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing, > so > > I > > personally returned them. The 24 Camays which had been taken and the > > three Camays you are supposed to receive daily. I don't know anything > > about the four Cashmere Bouquets. Obviously your maid, Kathy, did not > > know I had returned your soaps, so she also brought 24 Camays plus the > > > three daily Camays. I don't know where you got the idea this hotel > > issues bath-size Dial. I was able to locate some bath-size Ivory which > I > > left in your room. > > Elaine Carmen > > Housekeeper > > > > > > Dear Mrs. Carmen, > > Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory. > > > As of today I possess: > > - On the shelf under the medicine cabinet -18 Camay > > in four stacks of four and one stack of two. > > - On the Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in two stacks of four and one > > stack of three. > > - On the bedroom dresser - one stack of three Cashmere Bouquet, one > > stack of four hotel-size Ivory, and eight Camay in two stacks of four. > > > - Inside the medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in three stacks of four and > one > > stack of two. > > - In the shower soap dish - six Camay, very moist. > > - On the northeast corner of the tub - one Cashmere Bouquet, slightly > > > used. > > - On the northwest corner of the tub - six Camays in two stacks of > > three. Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the > > stacks are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that > stacks > > of more than four have a tendency to tip. > > May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make > an > > excellent spot for future soap deliveries. One more item, I have > > purchased another bar of bath-size Dial which I am keeping in the > hotel > > vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings. > > S. Berman > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 19, 2000 Report Share Posted August 19, 2000 Hi Lee I have seen this so many times before, but had no idea it actually did take place. I always thought it was a joke! I hope it wasn't from a TOP London Hotel. ICQ - 53662031 AOL Instant Messenger (Screen name: crohn) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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