Re: Question about emotional fragility

July 7, 2006

Hi Sherry,

I think you quite eloquently answered your own question. I have

tears in my eyes as I type but I am also laughing. Your post made

me decide that I am going out tonight. It is my best mate's

birthday and he has invited me out. I usually don't go because I

know what's going to happen and I will suffer. But suffer I will

because I aint gunna give up living, well, not until tommorow, when

I'll be suffering from a different type of emotional fragility. LOL

I'm sure there's a song in that somewhere. A few sherbuts and a

Ruby Murray to finish off with. (Beer and a curry) At least

something will be hot tonight, if not me. I feel like a teenager

again, better check I haven't broken out in spots.

Keep the light shining,

Ian.

>

> Is it common for PA to affect the emotions, and not just from a

> depression standpoint? I find myself very teary during flairs.

> Just having someone, even a doctor, ask how I'm doing makes me

burst

> into tears.

>

> I'm not typically that fragile. I've reared 2 children to adulthood

> very successfully, owned and run a successful business, written a

> regular newpaper column, etc. At least, that was the " old " me.

> Yeah, during my adolescence and childbearing years, I used to get

> emotional during PMS time, and yeah, I had bouts of emotionalism

> during menopause, but this feels different and just seems to come

> out of nowhere.

>

> I say " not just from a depression standpoint " because this feels

> different from depression. I've been depressed before, once to the

> point of needing anti-depressants for 2 years, but that felt

> different. Then, I just wanted to sleep all the time, didn't feel

> like getting dressed, didn't want to be around people, didn't take

> joy in what usually gave me pleasure.

>

> This isn't like that. Yes, I am sleeping a little more - maybe one

> extra hour at night and a 20 minute nap in the afternoon when I get

> drowsy. I think that is just side effects from the naproxen. I

> still want to go and do things, still want to be around people,

> still enjoy my normal pleasures (when physically possible) - it's

> just that I cry at the drop of a hat!!!!

>

> Just curious to see if anyone else has the same experience...

>

> regards,

> sherry

>

> [Editor's Note: Yes, Sherry, it is very common with any chronic

disease. PA wears us down physically and causes extreme fatigue and

depression because your body is so busy fighting itself and you are

in more or less constant pain. Even the cheeriest among us gets

down now and then. One of our members, Betsy, gives herself 7

minute pity parties and uses a cooking timer to signal when to

stop. I allow myself slightly more than that to wallow in my misery

and then I kick myself in gear and get involved with something (or

someone) else and I also play mind games where I concentrate on

something wondrous and beautiful in my life. You might need a boost

from a pill - but in any case you should certainly let your rheumy

know that you have these feelings. Kathy F.

>

July 7, 2006

Ian,

Do-re-mi... " This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine... "

Not exactly broadway - more like Sunday school - but it makes me

smile and I sing it every time I read your sign-off!

I hope you have a wonderful time tonight with your mates. Some

things are worth a little suffering, yes? I'm getting thirsty for a

Guinness myself. I'll see if I can talk hubby into taking me out

tomorrow. Thanks for the good cheer.

sherry z

>

> Hi Sherry,

>

> I think you quite eloquently answered your own question. I have

> tears in my eyes as I type but I am also laughing. Your post made

> me decide that I am going out tonight. It is my best mate's

> birthday and he has invited me out. I usually don't go because I

> know what's going to happen and I will suffer. But suffer I will

> because I aint gunna give up living, well, not until tommorow,

when

> I'll be suffering from a different type of emotional fragility.

LOL

> I'm sure there's a song in that somewhere. A few sherbuts and a

> Ruby Murray to finish off with. (Beer and a curry) At least

> something will be hot tonight, if not me. I feel like a teenager

> again, better check I haven't broken out in spots.

>

> Keep the light shining,

> Ian.

>

July 8, 2006

Hi Sherry:

I haven't felt depressed but somedays I'm just more emotional and the

tears flow easily. I talked to my family doc and he put me on

Pamelor. He said it would also help me with the pain.

Unfortunately, my system did not like the drug so I was switched to

Zoloft and this has really helped me.

A few years ago a disc jokey from a local radio station was talking

about his mom and how crippled she was from arthritis. She was wheel

chair bound and he said she never complained. He said she was his

hero because most older people complain all the time about their

health. Since that day I decided to stop complaining about my pain.

I always think of her and I tell people that there are a lot of

people in the world who are a lot worse off than me. When the pain

is really bad I call my mom and vent to her. Everyone handles things

differently but this is what works for me. Good luck!

[Editor's Note: I think this list can be a great place to vent so that we don't

have to keep venting at the people who help us the most. My way of coping is to

briefly mourn the things I can no longer do and then celebrate often all the

things I still can. By re-directing my focus on what I still have rather than

on what I have lost, I realize that there is lots of joy to be had every day -

even though each day brings its challenges and pain. Kathy F.]

Alison

> Is it common for PA to affect the emotions, and not just from a

> depression standpoint? I find myself very teary during flairs.

> Just having someone, even a doctor, ask how I'm doing makes me burst

> into tears.

>

July 9, 2006

Hey...I've wondered too Sherry....I seem to cry a little more these days. Like

after each injection...and it's not that painful. I cried when my primary care

doc gave me a gentle talking to about what I was doing for myself other than

taking care of and cleaning when she was at her Dad's. He once fixed me

up with a friend of his. It was so sweet of him and he was embarrassed to ask if

he could but he's been my doc for 8 years so we have been through much together.

I was so touched that he would be concerned with all aspects of my life that I

sat there and cried. I cry sometimes when I see someone I have not seen for

months and months due to the PA because I end up telling them what has been

going on and when I tell the whole story in one breath like that it gets to me.

I don't think I fully realize what I've been through over the past 6 months

until I voice it. I have told myself that as long as I am crying over legitimate

things and as long as I get over it shortly

that it's ok and normal. I did not have much to cry about before. Ok...I did.

Scratch that. But this has been alot. Maybe we are ok. I think we should watch

ourselves though.Depression IS supposed to be part of this disease at times. I

agree with you though that this feels different for me...not like a time that I

WAS depressed about 20 years ago and could not get out of bed. There was a

reason for that too and it was just something that was too hard for me to bear.

I got treatment and therapy and have done well ever since. We should keep in

touch about it. -Betz

Betsy Jack itsbetsy@...

[ ] Question about emotional fragility

Is it common for PA to affect the emotions, and not just from a

depression standpoint? I find myself very teary during flairs.

Just having someone, even a doctor, ask how I'm doing makes me burst

into tears.

I'm not typically that fragile. I've reared 2 children to adulthood

very successfully, owned and run a successful business, written a

regular newpaper column, etc. At least, that was the " old " me.

Yeah, during my adolescence and childbearing years, I used to get

emotional during PMS time, and yeah, I had bouts of emotionalism

during menopause, but this feels different and just seems to come

out of nowhere.

I say " not just from a depression standpoint " because this feels

different from depression. I've been depressed before, once to the

point of needing anti-depressants for 2 years, but that felt

different. Then, I just wanted to sleep all the time, didn't feel

like getting dressed, didn't want to be around people, didn't take

joy in what usually gave me pleasure.

This isn't like that. Yes, I am sleeping a little more - maybe one

extra hour at night and a 20 minute nap in the afternoon when I get

drowsy. I think that is just side effects from the naproxen. I

still want to go and do things, still want to be around people,

still enjoy my normal pleasures (when physically possible) - it's

just that I cry at the drop of a hat!!!!

Just curious to see if anyone else has the same experience.. .

regards,

sherry

[Editor's Note: Yes, Sherry, it is very common with any chronic disease. PA

wears us down physically and causes extreme fatigue and depression because your

body is so busy fighting itself and you are in more or less constant pain. Even

the cheeriest among us gets down now and then. One of our members, Betsy, gives

herself 7 minute pity parties and uses a cooking timer to signal when to stop. I

allow myself slightly more than that to wallow in my misery and then I kick

myself in gear and get involved with something (or someone) else and I also play

mind games where I concentrate on something wondrous and beautiful in my life.

You might need a boost from a pill - but in any case you should certainly let

your rheumy know that you have these feelings. Kathy F.

July 10, 2006

Betz - I've made up a name for it. " Sadness-not-depression. " Haven't

cried for several days now. For one thing, I'm reminding myself that

it just takes too darn much energy and I've got none to spare. Or,

too many " spoons " as the wonderful spoon theory would say.

And I never cried for more than 7 minutes, anyway!!!

There are some really inspiring stories over at www.flakehq.com about

people who have found love in spite of P or PA. Makes you realize

that anything is possible!

best to betz,

sherry z

>

> Hey...I've wondered too Sherry....I seem to cry a little more these

days. Like after each injection...and it's not that painful. I

July 12, 2006

Sherry...I love the spoon story and analogy too and I don't CRY for

7 minutes...sometimes I take the plastic bags I save from the

supermarket, throw them up in the air and then kick and punch the

crap out of them. I end up laughing before the timer goes off. I

learned how to move when I'm mad from my daughter. I was afraid to

be " actively angry " or upset for a long time because there is a

history of physical abuse in my family. But now I know it can be a

great release. I'm always alone when I have my Pity Party. I have to

schedule time to be upset. How funny is that. I doubt I'd have time

for " love " either right now. lol. It's been awhile since I've felt

the urge to do that surprisingly enough. I AM doing alot of things

to keep me moving forward. We now have in home help coming for my

daughter so her therapy is being bumped up a notch and that is a

GOOD thing. I think you are right though....it is ok and natural for

us to be sad about our situation...as long as it does not become

overwhelming and disabling. -Betz

, " S. Zorzi " <szorzi_1999@...>

wrote:

>

> Betz - I've made up a name for it. " Sadness-not-depression. "

Haven't

> cried for several days now. For one thing, I'm reminding myself

that

> it just takes too darn much energy and I've got none to spare.

Or,

> too many " spoons " as the wonderful spoon theory would say.

>

> And I never cried for more than 7 minutes, anyway!!!

>

> There are some really inspiring stories over at www.flakehq.com

about

> people who have found love in spite of P or PA. Makes you realize

> that anything is possible!

>

> best to betz,

> sherry z

>

July 12, 2006

oh my Lord. I need to proof-read. The sentence " It's been awhile before I felt

the urge to do that " was not supposed to be after the sentence about love. lol.

That sentence was supposed to be about having Pity Parties. lol. Of course, it

would not matter either way I suppose because the last time I had a date I think

we listened to an 8-track. -Betz

Betsy <itsbetsy@...> wrote: Sherry...I love the spoon

story and analogy too and I don't CRY for