O.T. Dana/Anyone...

[Guest guest]

everyone of my dd friends have finally left her. sometimes she comes

out of her little world and says " mom, nobody calls me " ... but most

times she shows no sadness or emotion. the only real emotion i ever

see is anger, or running. i am constantly shopping around for some new

friends for her, but I think i am more sad than her. when i finally

find some; she can't seem to build a realationship or she gets mad, if

she is having a bad day. does anyone relate to this pain, and do you

have some suggestions?

[Guest guest]

>

> everyone of my dd friends have finally left her. sometimes she comes

> out of her little world and says " mom, nobody calls me " ...

As a general rule, I tend to be straight with my kids. If this was my

child, at the times when she said that to me, I would tell her the

truth. So something like " they never call you because you don't play

nice " or whatever the reason is. I then teach my kids how to correct

the problem.

If I know my child is trying, and the other child is generally nice,

many times I will talk to the other child. Something like " thanks for

being my child's friend. Sometimes he has trouble being nice [or

talking, or whatever] but he is trying and he really likes you and

wants to be your friend " .

Dana

[Guest guest]

>

> everyone of my dd friends have finally left her. sometimes she

comes

> out of her little world and says " mom, nobody calls me " ... but most

> times she shows no sadness or emotion. the only real emotion i ever

> see is anger, or running. i am constantly shopping around for some

new

> friends for her, but I think i am more sad than her. when i

finally

> find some; she can't seem to build a realationship or she gets

mad, if

> she is having a bad day. does anyone relate to this pain, and do

you

> have some suggestions?

>

I pulled my kids out of school and homeschooled them. I worked first

and foremost on them having a positive relationship with me and with

each other. I used to sometimes stress about their " lack of

friends " . Then my oldest began telling me to essentially butt out

and mind my own business.

Excerpt from http://www.kidslikemine.org/aspie.shtml:

" My oldest son's social life is primarily online at the moment. He

and his brother have one close friend who practically moved in with

us a couple of years back. They have a few acquaintances who come

over occasionally. Once in a while, I try to fix this problem he has

of " not having a social life " and he says " I have a social life. I

have a lot of friends. They are just online friends. " And when I

say " But normal people.. " he says " Your social life is mostly

online. How is that different? Why is this a problem? "

So, here are my thoughts on why I should quit having a problem with

him living much as I live and being happy with it even though I,

personally, would prefer more face-to-face (local) friends but I am,

in fact, basically happy and I am getting my needs met better these

days than ever before because I now have a lot of friends, even

though they are mostly online friends. "

Michele

http://www.healthgazelle.org

http://www.kidslikemine.org